FRANCIS Kennington Park Road
FRANCIS
Kennington Park Road
I knew my little fox wouldn’t make things easy for me, but now that I’m holding him close and can feel his reaction pressing against mine, his eager hands pulling me towards his lips, and beneath the scent of sugar, cocoa, and raspberries, I catch something even sweeter, even more enticing, something that’s pure Jack…
I realise he hasn’t just made things difficult. He’s made them impossible.
I give in to him, let him take the lead in the kiss, because I want him to be in full control. I want him to have the freedom to pull away at any moment, if that’s what he wants, but of course, he doesn’t.
On the contrary, he deepens the kiss until I feel his tongue in my mouth, small and soft, teasing and insistent as he tastes me with unrestrained hunger, one I can’t help but match, kiss for kiss.
Before I even realise it, we’re grinding desperately against each other, seeking friction, chasing relief, but just before things go too far, I find the strength to pull back. Still holding him tightly in my arms, I break the kiss so I can look him in the eye.
But before I can say a word, Jack gets there first. Eyes flashing, he launches into one of his trademark tirades.
“If you’re about to bolt again, Starkey, don’t even think about it. I’m not letting you off the hook this time, and I’m definitely not…”
I do the only thing I know will shut him up.
I lean in and kiss him again, slow, lingering, until I feel him relax against me. Only then do I rest my forehead against his and try again.
“I’m not going anywhere, little fox. Like I said, that ship’s already sailed. But I do want you to take a moment to think this through. Ask yourself if being with a grumpy, constantly overwhelmed doctor with a kid and, well, someone a bit older than you is really what you want.”
I pause, then add softly, “And for the record, those weren’t all excuses last time.”
Jack gives me a proper death glare for a second, so I quickly try to fix it. “Okay, fine, some of them might’ve been bullshit. But the part about your future, your talent, your career, that still stands. And so does the part about Adele.”
I exhale. “We both have a lot to lose by getting into something like this, but I trust you, and I trust your judgement. And if you’re really sure you want to give this a shot, then I’m willing to try. Hell, I’m even ready to talk to Ian… and your parents, if you think that’s necessary.”
He stares at me, eyes wide, mouth open, his classic ‘shocked Jack’ face, then throws himself at me again, grabbing my face in both hands and kissing me like he means it.
He only pulls back when he’s clearly run out of oxygen, and says, breathless, “I don’t need time to think, Starkey.
I’ve been thinking about this for months and the answer is yes, of course I want a chance with you.
Just tell me what changed your mind. The other day you seemed so set on walking away…
I honestly didn’t think it would be this easy to get you to cave. ”
“Oh, so you admit it. You were trying to make me give in!” I tease, starting to tickle him. He squirms and laughs, but somehow still manages to gasp out, “That’s not fair, you haven’t answered me!”
“You’re right…” I stop, and after pulling him into another hug, I bury the tip of my nose in his hair.
“Let’s just say I would’ve gotten there eventually anyway…
I can’t seem to stay away from you, little fox, you must’ve noticed.
But yes, a friend gave me a bit of a push. Helped me reflect on a few things.”
“Let me guess, it was Remi,” he says, eyes gleaming mischievously.
“How did you know?” I ask, genuinely surprised.
He shrugs. “It wasn’t that hard to figure out. He’s pretty much the only person I’ve ever seen you actually listen to.”
“Okay, okay, I can’t deny it…” I admit with a laugh, then go on, “So if we agree to keep seeing each other, consider yourself fired.”
“What, wait, what?” Jack blinks, startled in my arms, and not wanting to see him upset for even a second, I rush to explain.
“As it happens, Remi’s already found someone qualified to take over your job.
If you’re going to be my boyfriend, you can’t keep being my babysitter too.
And besides, this schedule wasn’t going to be sustainable much longer anyway, I know you’ve been exhausted, and that’s not okay.
It’s time you took that position at the dance school, the one that’s been waiting for you. ”
“H-How do you even know about that?” he asks, wide-eyed, and his adorable innocence makes me burst out laughing again.
“Did you really think anyone in the Blackbird group is capable of keeping a secret? They’re the biggest bunch of gossips I’ve ever met, don’t tell me you hadn’t noticed?”
“Uhm… maybe I’ve still got a lot to learn about your friends…”
“They’re your friends too now… and they care about you. They respect you and trust you. Don’t ever forget that.”
“I won’t,” he says, with a soft smile, one that dims almost immediately, like a cloud passing over the sun.
“And Adele?” he asks hesitantly. “What am I going to do without her? What is she going to do without me? We’re used to seeing each other every day and…”
“You can come and see Adele whenever you want, Jack. Even if I’m not home, don’t worry. I know you love her, and she loves you too. That’s not going to change. But it’s time you started looking after yourself again, too.”
I pause, making sure he’s really listening.
“You’ve done so much for us these past few months, and whatever happens, I’ll always be grateful for that. But now it’s time you start focusing on your own life again. And if you’ll let me, I’d like to be there for you too. I’m not planning on letting you go, McAvoy.
And don’t worry, the new babysitter comes with excellent references. We’ll handle the handover gently, so Adele can get used to her gradually, okay?”
“Okay…” Jack nods, his gaze locking onto mine, those big amber eyes steady and searching. “You’ve really thought of everything, haven’t you?”
“Yeah...” I admit quietly, “Whatever might’ve happened between us, I knew I had to do the right thing, for you.”
“And that’s exactly one of the reasons I like you, Dr Starkey,” Jack murmurs, his voice soft but teasing. “Because underneath that infuriating exterior, I know you’re a good man.”
“Hmm... infuriating exterior, is it?”
“Yeah. Though, in all fairness... it’s a rather attractive one.”
He cups my face in his hands and kisses me again, and as I pull him close, I’m suddenly overwhelmed by this impossible sense of lightness, like I’m floating. Like I’m happy. Happier than I’ve been in... probably ever.
Then I glance around the room and reality crashes back down. In just a few hours, this house will be full of guests and not only is the place a complete mess, but we don’t even have a cake.
“So… what now?” Jack asks, following my gaze around the chaos we’ve left behind.
“Um… I guess all that’s left is to clean up and then run out to buy a cake,” I reply, brushing the tip of my nose against his.
“That’s not what I meant…” he sighs, sounding like something’s genuinely weighing on him.
“What I meant is, what do we do about the others? Do we tell everyone straight away that we’re seeing each other?
I’m not sure I’m ready yet to be bombarded with questions and teasing about us.
And it’s Adele’s first birthday party, her first Christmas with us…
I think the focus should really stay on that. ”
“You don’t need to explain, little fox,” I murmur.
“We’ll go at your pace. I’m not in a rush to become Blackbird gossip either.
But you’ve probably figured out by now, secrets don’t last long in this group.
So just know that sooner or later, we will have to tell them.
But until then, you can count on my… discretion. ”
I wink at him, expecting to feel him finally relax in my arms, but clearly, there’s still something bothering him. After a brief hesitation, he starts speaking again.
“There’s… there’s one more thing…”
He lowers his gaze, suddenly flustered, and his cheeks flush in the most adorable way.
“Go on, sweetheart, I’m listening…”
It’s the first time I’ve used something that affectionate with him, and he looks almost caught off guard. But then he takes a breath and finally confesses what’s been weighing on his mind.
“I… I’ve never had a boyfriend before. Not even a girlfriend, actually. And I’m not… I don’t really have any experience, you know…”
“Well…” I reply gently, trying to sound encouraging, “I had a feeling.”
“You did?” he says, surprised. “Am I that awkward?”
“No, no…” I chuckle. “Not at all. It’s just that Ian already warned me to keep my distance because you were still a bit… inexperienced.”
“He did what?” Jack tenses immediately, jaw clenching. “How dare he say something like that?”
“You know what he’s like…” I wave a hand dismissively. “But don’t worry. When we talk to him, we’ll make it perfectly clear that we’re both serious about this.”
“I’m not worried about that...” he says, lowering his voice again, his tone hesitant.
“Then what are you worried about?” I ask gently. “I thought we’d already gone through all the possible issues that could come up and figured out there’s nothing we can’t handle. What is it, my little fox?”
I lift his chin softly between my thumb and forefinger, guiding his gaze back to mine. “You know you can tell me anything, Jack. There’s nothing, nothing, that would make me change my mind about us, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
He lets out a heavy sigh and finally says it, in one breath:
“I… I’m still a virgin, Francis. And honestly, I don’t know when I’ll be ready for that. You’ve had so many experiences, and I’m scared that one day you’ll get tired of waiting.”
“Don’t even joke about that,” I cut in firmly, but without anger.
“Choosing to give this a chance wasn’t easy for me; it’s actually one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
I’m placing my heart in your hands, Jack.
And I’m not telling you that to pressure you, but so you understand just how much I want you.
And not just physically. Of course I’m attracted to you.
God, every time I see you in those black leggings you always wear, I want to do things to you that…
” I catch myself and smile. “But it’s so much more than that.
I want all of you. And I’m willing to wait as long as it takes.
And when you do feel ready, we’ll only do what you feel comfortable with.
What you want. Until then, I swear, there won’t be any pressure or expectations from me. None.”
In response, he simply rests his forehead against mine and murmurs, “Alright, Starkey, I trust you.”