Chapter 16
Spence didn’t think he’d ever heard the term “traumatic shock” before, and he certainly had never heard of “hypovolemic shock.” He had heard Dr. Masters say something about an overwhelming inflammatory response, in turn causing acute respiratory distress, and heard about the possibility of something called MODS—multiple organ dysfunction…
syndrome, he thought—but he wasn’t really processing all the words.
All he was certain of was the doctor’s grim expression and the words, It doesn’t look good right now.
Even the woman’s assurance that if Spence hadn’t done what he’d done so quickly, this could have happened out in the cave and he would have had only a body to bring home, didn’t help much.
“But she was…fine. Hurting, but fine,” he finally said, feeling more than a little lost. And a lot guilty.
How could he have left Hetty and gone off with the cops while she’d been fighting for her life?
It didn’t matter that she’d seemed fine when she’d gone in, she’d been shot and he should have stayed with her.
How had he not realized how seriously injured she was? How could he have just watched them wheel her away and then take off for essentially a chat in the park?
“It happens,” Dr. Masters said. “Adrenaline and other reactions to being under stress, as you two obviously were, can keep someone going beyond what we’d expect.
But then when the crash comes…” She hesitated.
“We’ll have to watch her very carefully.
She’s in serious condition, Mr. Colton. The next several hours are critical. ”
“Can I see her? I…need to see her.”
“Not just yet. When we get her settled in ICU with all the monitors we need, we’ll let you know.”
It wasn’t until the doctor walked away that Spence realized his father was staring at him. He must have sounded as desperate as he felt.
“I know going through something like this is…intense,” Dad said very quietly. “But…is there something else going on here, Spence?”
Like what? That we both confessed during the night that we’ve always had feelings for each other? Since eleventh grade? And now she’s in there fighting for her life. Should I have kept my stupid mouth shut? I should have—
His father’s arm around his shoulders cut off the runaway train of thought. An image from long ago, when he’d been a kid, flashed through his mind, of his father explaining why the Colton family motto was Believe.
Your aunt Caroline deserved to be believed, Spence, and because she wasn’t, she ended up murdered, along with our parents.
A high price to pay for a lesson we’ll never forget.
If you have a problem, if something’s wrong, tell us.
If you can’t tell me or your mom, tell your uncle or aunt.
And do it knowing we will first and foremost believe you.
He could talk to Mom about it. Maybe not Dad, who seemed to be on a “When am I going to get grandchildren?” binge of late.
And that was something Spence wasn’t ready to deal with.
He wasn’t sure he ever would be. But then, he had been certain he could never be honest with Hetty, either, yet last night he had been.
He gave a shake of his head. It seemed much longer than mere hours since he’d finally admitted his feelings for Hetty.
He opened his mouth to speak but closed it again. They had been so wrapped up in the revelation that they’d both been hiding how they’d felt about each other for so long, they’d said nothing about where things would go from here. Nothing about future plans.
And now Hetty might not have a future.
“Later, Dad,” he said finally. “When I’m sure she’s going to be all right.”
Because if she wasn’t, there was no point. To anything.
“All right, son. Just know that we love you and whatever you decide, we’re with you.”
Spence wasn’t sure he understood what his father meant, because there was no way he could know what had happened up in that cave. He shoved it aside for now, because only one thing mattered.
The ICU nurse was kind and gentle, but Spence suspected she could be tough as nails. He’d encountered the kind side first when she’d let him stay in the room with Hetty while she went about her business.
He found he could only watch Hetty for so long before he got twitchy because she wasn’t moving. Hetty being still was a rare occurrence; she was always on the verge of motion. Seeing her lying motionless only pounded home to him how bad this really must be.
His mind was whirling as if it could make up for her stillness by racing in all directions at once.
Was life really this unfair that it would take her away the moment they’d admitted the surface tension between them had always been just that, on the surface?
That it had masked something else they’d both thought had to be kept hidden?
So—what?—they realized it, admitted it, and then it was yanked away?
Or was it that they had to go through this?
Was it that nothing less than some kind of near-death experience was what it took to blast through the decade-thick barrier they’d built between them, Spence mostly with flippancy, Hetty with biting sarcasm?
Maybe it took this to shatter those two solid facades?
But why her? Why not him? Spencer wished it had been.
Not because he thought he was tougher than she was—he wasn’t at all sure of that—but because he hated to think of her in such pain.
Hated to think of her hanging on the edge like this.
He’d rather it was him than to be sitting there watching her like this.
He should have realized. He should have known how badly she was hurt, never mind that she’d kept saying she was all right. He should have known by the way she had opened up and talked, if nothing else. Hetty never did that. Not with him, anyway.
Had she known? Had she somehow realized this was going to turn bad on her? Was that why she’d opened up last night, why she’d admitted that he hadn’t been the only one feeling attraction since all the way back in high school?
That idea jabbed at him worst of all. Why wouldn’t she have told him if she was feeling that bad? He would have figured out a way to get her out of there sooner if he’d known she was going to crash like this. Somehow. Even if he’d had to carry her every step of the way.
Spence would have sworn the clock over the door had somehow been piped through a loudspeaker because he could hear every ticked second as if it echoed off the walls.
Every second that went by that she didn’t move, didn’t wake up.
The nurse glanced at him now and then, smiling in understanding, and he wondered how she could stand this kind of work.
People weren’t nearly appreciative enough of individuals in this profession, until it came to hellish times like this.
He’d muted his phone an hour ago, when he’d first come in to sit at her bedside.
Out of the need for distraction he pulled it out and saw a screen full of missed calls and texts.
He knew Hetty’s brother Troy was out on an oil rig so he wasn’t surprised that there wasn’t anything from him.
Every other sibling she had, which meant five, had all texted.
Then there was Dad, checking back in, and Mom, saying she’d be there in an hour.
Hetty’s mom, who was out of town, had left a voice message saying she was on her way back.
His cousin Lakin, who was very close to Hetty, had also texted she was on her way.
And at the end of the list, a brief text from his cousin Eli, only saying he’d see him soon. So he probably had been assigned the case of the body they’d found. Something Spence was having a little trouble caring about at the moment.
A quiet whisper of his name came from the doorway and he looked up to see Parker standing there. He got up and walked over to him, and they stepped outside the room, although Spence made sure he was standing where he could still see her.
“How is she?”
“Not great.” He couldn’t help the grim tone in his voice.
“She’s as tough as she needs to be, Spence. She’ll pull through.”
She has to. She just has to.
He didn’t say it aloud, afraid it would come out as nothing less than a whine.
“Let me know if anything changes, will you?” Parker asked. “I’m going to head out with Chuck to see what can be done about the plane.”
“Okay.” Then, as his brain woke up to what his cousin had actually said—that he and the RTA mechanic were going to the campsite where it had all happened—he added sharply, “Hey, wait, we don’t know if that guy is still out there.”
Parker’s mouth quirked. “Aw, cuz, you care.”
Something hot and sharp welled up inside him. “Don’t joke around when Hetty’s lying in there possibly dying.”
Parker looked startled then thoughtful. “Well, well,” he murmured.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing,” his cousin said almost cheerfully. He turned to go then looked back. “Except it’s about time.”
Spence stared after his cousin. What was that supposed to mean? And when had that become the question of the day?
For a moment he just stood there, feeling a little stunned. Was he wearing a freaking sign or something? First Dad, hinting that he’d known something was brewing. Now Parker, acting like he’d known all along that all the sniping and poking at each other was a cover.
He let out a compressed breath, shoved all that aside, too, and went back into the room where the only thing that really mattered right now lay so very, very still.