Chapter 10
CHAPTER 10
A NNIE
The last few days at work have sucked.
Monday because it wasn’t a B shift, so I knew all day that Jack wouldn’t be coming in. Therefore, I couldn’t sneak a fix by discreetly checking him out.
Today, because it is a B shift, and I know there’s a good chance I’ll see him and an even better chance it will drive me crazy since I want him, but can’t let myself have him.
I realize it’s a damned if I do, damned if I don’t situation.
I’ve gone over the events of the weekend in my head a million times—especially our conversation Sunday on my porch.
It seems like I haven’t seen Jack in a week, but it’s only been two days. Remembering not just the physical—the feel of him under me as I straddled him on his couch, the sensation of his mouth on my nipple—but the man I was enjoying getting to know, I realize, with some alarm, that I’d like to keep getting to know him. If we didn’t work together.
If that isn’t bad enough, the first time I see him today is when he comes walking into my ER carrying a five-year-old little girl who’s fallen off her bike and has an open fracture of her arm. She’s crying into his chest. Fitz walks in next to him, guiding the mom and holding up the IV fluid.
Of course, today of all days, I would have the pediatric rooms as part of my assignment, making it impossible to avoid close proximity to Jack.
The little girl will have to go to the operating room for the repair of her arm, but she’s got a big gash on her forehead that we’ll need to stitch up in the ER first. She’s still crying big droplets of tears as I prepare some pain meds and the suture tray Dr. Evans will need to stitch her up.
I do my work while trying not to make eye contact with Jack.
Her mom is on one side of the bed, comforting her, and I try to relieve Jack on the other, but the little girl nearly goes hysterical when I do.
“No!” she sobs. “I want Fireman Jack. Please don’t leave me!” she cries, looking at him with giant eyes and a trembling lower lip.
My heart melts and my resolve weakens when Jack wipes one of those tears and says, “I’m not leaving. I’ll stay right here until the doctor is done and it doesn’t hurt anymore. Okay?”
Stay he does, distracting her with some story about a brave princess as he gently pushes her hair, wet from crying, back from her face.
Just as Dr. Evans is finishing the stitches, Janie pops her head in to see if we need any help.
I ask her to relieve me for a minute, saying I need to check on another patient.
That’s a lie, but I need to get away from this room before Jack does or I’m likely to pull him into our decontamination bay and agree to a million dates if he will just put his mouth on mine again .
What the hell is wrong with me?
JACK
I can’t help but stare as Annie walks out of the room. Everything in me screams to follow her, to talk about this past weekend.
She wouldn’t even look at me when she was in here helping Dr. Evans as he stitched up our patient.
Maybe I went too far with her on her porch, or maybe she thought about it and regrets what happened with us on my couch after the brunch.
When my sweet patient has stopped crying and her sutures are done, I say goodbye and leave the room to speak with Annie. She’s nowhere to be found.
Unfortunately, my efforts are interrupted by the grainy static and blaring alert of my radio. I have to abandon my efforts to find her to go on another emergency medical call.
An hour later, at six forty-five p.m., Fitz and I are back at the ER, rolling our eighty-seven-year-old confused patient in from one of our city’s local senior living apartments.
If I had to guess, I’d venture that this is a bladder infection knocking her on her butt. At least she’s pleasant.
The last time Fitz and I had to bring in an elderly patient who was confused, he was combative and bit me. I can still remember the deep ache in my shoulder from the tetanus shot I had to get because of that one.
Given the late hour, this will probably be the last chance I get to see Annie today before her shift ends. Fitz and I lift the patient from our stretcher to the ER cot, and Janie, who is her primary nurse, walks in with Annie in tow. I know she’s here to help Janie get her patient settled, but my frustration escalates when Annie refuses to look in my direction yet again.
I’m determined not to let her escape into one of the many hiding places the ER provides. This time, when I leave the patient with them, I decide to wait outside the room to get a word with her. I don’t understand why I can’t get this woman out of my mind.
She comes out of the room tentatively, first peeking down the hall to the right, and now I’m sure she’s been avoiding me.
As she looks to her left, where I am, she clearly startles. I smirk at her. “Hi, Annie.”
Trying to act like she wasn’t just trying to avoid me, she smiles politely.
“Oh, hey, Jack. How are you?” Her voice is high pitched and her speech is more rapid than usual.
I find it adorable as hell. “I’d be better if I hadn’t been here four times today, and each time it seemed like you were trying to avoid me.” I smile at her, not wanting to freak her out. “I’m hoping like hell that it’s not because you regret the weekend.”
She puts her hands over her eyes for a second, looking like she’s trying to gather her thoughts, and I panic, thinking maybe she really is going to tell me she regrets it.
When she looks at me again, she says softly, “No, I don’t regret it. I wish I did. It would make it easier.”
I move closer to her, careful not to crowd her, though.
“Listen, Annie. I meant everything I said when I dropped you off Sunday. I want to get to know you better. I want to spend time with you. I promise you I won’t do anything to mess with your work situation. I can tell your career and this position is important to you.”
She hesitates. “I don’t know, Jack… My rule…”
Seeing a glimmer of hope that she’ll reconsider, I decide to go for it. “Don’t decide anything now. Just think about it. I’ll make a deal if it helps.”
“What kind of deal?” she asks, finally looking me in the eye, eyebrows lifting toward her hairline and her curiosity clearly piqued.
“I’ll likely be captain soon, which means I won’t usually have to do the paramedic runs unless I want to. If you agree to let us spend more time together and it doesn’t work out, I promise I’ll stop coming in on optional squad runs once I make captain… if you want me to.”
She peers up, staring at me with those enormous eyes for a minute but, before she can say anything in reply, my radio goes off for another emergency call.
I wink at her. “Saved by the bell. Just think about it, Annie.” And I head out for yet another emergency run.
ANNIE
Standing outside of our ER trauma rooms, I scratch out a few notes on the scrap paper I’m using to write what supplies I need for restocking these crash carts. I flip the defibrillator on to make sure it charges correctly. It would be pretty bad if we needed to shock someone’s heart, and it wasn’t working, so we check it every day. Well, we are supposed to check it every day. Looking down at the clipboard to initial that it’s been checked, I see that it’s been five days and the last person to check it off was me. Jesus, it’s not that hard, people. Do your job.
It’s also been five days since I’ve seen Jack, and it’s nearly driving me insane. Between Jack’s days off and mine, I knew I wouldn’t see him again until at least today.
Since I had a long weekend off and needed to get Jack out of my mind, I made the trip back to Columbus to see Kelly, her kiddos, and Mom. Seeing the littles was great but having to deal with my mom’s hounding did nothing to help prevent my impending slide into insanity.
I got through it, though, and Bean and I arrived back in Elladine yesterday afternoon. I’m here at work today and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I’m itching to see a certain firefighter.
This morning was quiet enough that my colleagues and I could catch up about the goings on in each other’s lives, but it’s noon now and we’ve had four ambulances arrive in the last forty-five minutes. Around one p.m., I walk out of room seven after helping get that patient settled in and I get my first Jack fix. He and Fitz are rolling in an elderly gentleman from a car accident. I help his nurse get him hooked up to the heart monitor, sneak a few glances at Jack, then leave to get back to stocking our emergency carts as part of my ER charge nurse duties for the day.
“Darn it. Why doesn’t anyone restock these things when they use something?” I mutter to myself under my breath. Taking my list of needed supplies, I head into the supply room near the back of the ER and start collecting what I need. I’m almost done when the door opens behind me.
Before I can turn around, a familiar voice and the fresh, clean scent that reminds me of spring rain fills the room. It’s a scent that I associate with Jack, and I catch myself breathing in deeper to get more of it.
“Don’t mind me, Annie. I just need to reach above you to get a bag of IV fluid to replace ours… Then I’ll be out of your way.” He places a hand on my back as he reaches over my head.
If by “don’t mind me,” he means, ‘don’t notice the light touch of my hand on the small of your back or the flexing of my upper arm muscles at your eye level as I reach above you to get the IV fluid,’ then sure, I won’t mind him .
Having gotten what he came for, he removes his hand and turns like he is going to head out the door.
Not wanting to let him walk away, I quickly turn and squeak out, “How’s everything going?” God, I sound like an idiot.
He gives me a sweet smile and answers, “Good. How are you?”
“I’m okay.” I try to think of something to say that will help slow him from leaving. “I’ve actually been thinking…” I want to make myself say something more but can’t seem to spit anything out.
“Okay, thinking is always good. Care to share what about?” he asks with a flirty smile.
“I think we should hang out more… For the sake of the dogs,” I quickly add.
He’s quiet for a few seconds and it’s obvious he’s holding back a smile. “For the sake of the dogs?”
“Yeah, I mean, it’s pretty selfish of us to introduce them, let them become besties and then just cut them off from each other. Don’t you think? Just because I don’t date people I work with, and we do work together, doesn’t mean the dogs should suffer,” I say. God, now I’m rambling. I smile.
He’s openly smirking now. “Incredibly selfish,” he replies. I swear his eyes are laughing at me. “They’d probably hate us for it.”
I nod fervently. “I know Beanie would hate me for sure.”
Before he can reply again, his radio goes off.
“Here,” he says, handing me his cell phone. “Put your number in and I’ll text you so we can figure out when we can next get the dogs together.” His smile is huge, and I love I put it on his face.
I take his phone and enter my number before he heads out to his next call.