Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
“Women, they have minds, and they have souls, as well they have just hearts.” ~Louisa May Alcott, Little Women
“ Y our life is like a bad romance novel.” Summer arched a taunting eyebrow.
“I know.” Nat lowered her head to the table cluttered with homemade invitations.
For this week’s takeout and movie date at the Little Red Barn, they skipped the movie to discuss her disastrous romantic entanglements while handcrafting invitations for Elle’s bridal shower.
Summer had settled into her new-found role as party planner to the Perry elite, AKA anyone in the village that would hire her. Between shifts at Cassie’s Corner Café and mommy duty with her son, Liam, her business had exploded. In addition to wedding-related festivities, she agreed to plan the village’s Fall Fest scheduled for the end of September. With no excuse needed to pull out her trusty hot glue gun, Nat volunteered to assist with all crafty needs.
“You could at least get kissed by one of them,” Summer teased, stamping a purple teacup seal on the envelope.
Nat lifted her head. “I know.”
Unbridled laughter swooshed out of Summer. “Girl, you’re a mess. You have glitter all over your face.”
“Oh, goddessdamn,” she grumbled, swiping at the glittery grains.
“Why do you always say goddessdamn instead of goddamn?”
“Because God is a woman.”
Summer’s brow creased. “What makes you say that?”
“Because women can have multiple orgasms. No way a man thought of that.”
“Sound argument,” Summer paused, her face scrunched in thought. “Have you had multiple orgasms before?”
She sighed. “Only with Henry.”
“Who’s Henry?”
“My vibrator.”
“Why Henry?” Summer’s head tilted to the right.
“For Henry Cavill.” She fanned herself with an invitation, scattering even more glitter on her face.
She’d had good sex. There had been lots of okay sex. However, there’d never been the leg-trembling great sex that Nat read about in novels or had seen when bingeing old episodes of Sex in the City . Not a single boyfriend or hookup made her scream their name and dig her nails into their shoulders, only to leave her in a puddle of jellied muscles after a mind-blowing orgasm. Let alone given her a second one.
Thank the goddess for Henry getting her through this very long dry spell. Although it was less a dry spell and more a self-inflicted convent living at this point.
“I think that is the one thing I miss about Max.” Summer frowned, referring to Liam’s dad.
Summer had been tight-lipped about all things Max. The only item she’d offered about her New York City live-in boyfriend of four years was that he wasn’t nice to her. When she discovered she was pregnant, she left.
Nat nodded, continuing to brush her face with her now-glittered hands. Goddess, I’m a mess.
“You’re making it worse.” Summer shook her head. “Stop what you’re doing.” She got up and walked to the sink. Wetting a tea towel, she moved back to Nat.
“You’re such a mom sometimes.” She giggled as Summer swiped the lukewarm towel along her face.
“I know. Maternal aptitude oozes out of me.” Summer’s grin was self-deprecating.
“You’re a good mom…one of the best. And I know good moms. You’ve met mine, right?”
Summer nodded, placing the towel on the table. “Thank you…I needed to hear that.”
“Why? What’s going on?”
It wasn’t like Summer to question her mothering skills. There were so many things she excelled at. The way she never forgot customers’ names and orders despite the chaos of the cafe. How calmness vibrated off her while coordinating an event. The steadiness of her shoulders as she supported her friends. Above all, she shined brightest with the supportive, loving, and patient nurturing of Liam.
“Liam’s struggled a lot this year. Academically he’s killing it, we’re dealing with some behavioral and social challenges. The school psychologist recommended an autism behavioral specialist in Buffalo.”
Two years ago, Liam was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder low needs. Since then, Summer devoured literature, joined mailing lists, and visited message boards to identify various resources and strategies to support his success. In a small rural community like Perry, the services were limited for children on the spectrum. That didn’t deter Summer from being focused, resourceful, and a tenacious mama bear.
“Are they taking new patients?” she asked.
“Yes, in the fall, but it’s mid-day Thursdays. So, I’ll need to take off work, pull Liam out of school, and drive up there. Round trip it will be three hours, including his appointment, which I’m fine with. I just hate taking him away from school so much. Routine is important with Liam, and this will jack his routine up.”
“There’s nobody closer that offers the same services?”
She knew the answer before the question left her lips. There were limited healthcare services in the county, let alone behavioral health ones. The Owens Family Clinic had been the village’s only primary care service for nearly one hundred years. Outside of the optometrist clinic across the street from Clayton’s vet clinic and two dentists, there weren’t any other healthcare providers in Perry.
“I wish there were more services in the county for kids. When Liam was first assessed, I had to take him up to Buffalo. There are a few other parents at the school who also take their kids to specialists in Buffalo or Rochester.”
Nat nodded.
Summer sighed, sweeping her long chestnut hair up into a messy bun. “I just want to do what’s best for him. Sometimes I think about us moving to a city, but here we have my mom and dad. I…we have support. Over the last year, I feel like our circle has gotten so big.” Her chocolate eyes glimmered with threatening tears.
“The Liam and Summer Team has a deep bench.”
Since Summer reconnected with Elle last year, a whole new social network opened up to them. During school breaks or on the weekends, Liam, a budding future vet, visited Clayton’s clinic. Carmen and Mathew adjusted the weekly story time at Cow Tales, the village’s bookstore/coffee shop, to be accessible to individuals with sensory disabilities and challenges. Noah, and sometimes Todd, met them at the park to run around with Liam.
The nine-year-old was one of Nat’s favorite board game buddies. Although she could do without him destroying her at Connect 4 time after time. He was merciless.
Despite the many things Perry didn’t have, it offered so much love and support for Summer and her little boy. It was one of the reasons Nat came home… because Perry always made up for things it didn’t have with an abundance of what it did have: love.
Summer leaned back in the kitchen chair. “When I first came back, I was still Summer Michaels, the bitchy popular girl from high school. To so many in the village, I’m still that mean girl. At least, that’s how they see me. Over the last few months, I’ve started to feel like I’m more than that. More than just the girl people were happy to see leave and even happier to see come back knocked up with her tail between her legs.”
Nat placed a hand on Summer’s cheek, repeating Noah’s words. “Fuck them.”
“Asshole!” Summer laughed, swatting her hand away. “You glittered me.”
“Just so you remember that you sparkle.” She winked.
“How are we friends?”
“Because you love me.” Nat rubbed her glittered hands all over Summer’s face, who protested despite her deep-belly laughs.
“Speaking of love .” Summer waggled her now glitter-speckled eyebrows. “Can we go back to your little love triangle?”
Nat’s gaze drifted to the yellow gardenias from Noah taunting her from the kitchen counter. “First, I don’t think I appreciate the salacious way you say love . Second, there’s not much to talk about.”
“Well, I know you’ve been gaga for Noah since before it was age-appropriate for you to have those feelings, but what about Duncan? Were you in love with him?” Summer walked to the sink and cleaned the glitter from her face.
“I don’t…” Nat bit her lip.
“So, that’s a no.”
“It was high school. I mean, who falls in love when they are in high school?”
“You mean besides your parents, my parents, your brother, and half the village?”
Her lips puckered. “Clayton doesn’t count. His love was one-sided ’til Elle came back last year.”
“You know, the irony that your soon-to-be sister-in-law and you both crushed on Noah is not lost on me. Although, her crush is past tense.” Summer patted her face dry with a paper towel.
“Back to Duncan.” She puffed out a long breath.
Noah infiltrated far too much. Tamping down his presence in her life was reminiscent of trying to keep the sunshine out of a glass house.
“You lost your virginity to Duncan, right?”
“I didn’t lose it. I gave it to him.”
The eye roll at the idea of losing one’s virginity couldn’t be avoided. As if it was half of a pair of socks that went missing in the dryer. It’s not like she woke up and misplaced her hymen. It was a decision. Perhaps not a thought-out one, but a decision she made, nonetheless.
Summer sat in the chair, crossing her legs. “I take it there were no multiple orgasms.”
Nat grimaced.
“So, there were no orgasms.”
“We were eighteen. Neither of us knew what we were doing. Plus, we only had sex once.”
“Why only once? Was it that bad?” Summer’s face contorted in apologetic lamentation.
Nat blew out a heavy breath. “No. It was fine. It’s just…it was a mistake.”
Summer’s head jerked. “Mistake? What happened?”
“No. Not like that. It was consensual. I just wasn’t in a good headspace. We dated for almost two years. There was lots of kissing and a few make-out sessions worthy of a CW show, but I wasn’t in a rush to have sex.”
“Was he?”
“No… I mean, he was a teenage boy, so he was down. He never pushed me, though. Not for sex.”
“Why’d you have sex then?” Summer’s tone was soft and coaxing.
“Evan.” She closed her eyes. “He’d died. Everything was a mess. I just wanted to feel anything but what I was feeling. It wasn’t fair to Duncan. It wasn’t fair to me. We had sex, and two weeks later I broke up with him.”
“Because of the sex?”
“No. I mean, I don’t know. He just wanted more of me than what I was able to give. The sex took the relationship to the next level. Only while Duncan and the relationship were at that level, I was still a step below.”
That day flooded her senses. Duncan’s red-rimmed eyes imploring her to stay. The things she returned clenched in his hands. The tapping of the rain on the porch roof. The squish of her sneakers in the wet grass as she left him on the porch and crossed to her car.
“He deserved better. He still does. I can’t keep letting myself get caught up with what will never be.”
Summer placed a hand atop Nat’s. “It will never be if you never tell Noah how you feel.”
“Despite what you say, my life isn’t like a bad romance novel. Noah’s not going to fall head over feet for his best friend’s little sister.”
“Who says he hasn’t already?” Summer asked smugly.
“If the people who think you’re still Regina George only knew you’re actually a cross between Marmee and Beth from Little Women .”
A bashful smile tugged at her lips. “Thanks.”
“Of course, we know I’m Amy March.” Naturally, she’d be the youngest March sister whose artistic skills matched her own craftiness.
“And Noah’s your Laurie.”
Forehead wrinkled, Nat slipped her hand from beneath Summer’s and glittered her face. It was a very Amy March thing to do, after all.