Chapter 21
TWENTY-ONE
KENNEDY
It’s been the worst few weeks. Daylen’s words have cemented themselves into my head. I can’t escape them. Am I choosing misery over happiness? I’m certainly miserable now.
He’s been cold as ice to me. We meet as scheduled at the park to work on my vertical skills, but it’s all very robotic and formal.
There’s no playful banter. No intimate touches.
At a minimum, he used to find creative ways to touch my boobs which he thought were slick, but I always knew and let it happen. He’s not even attempting that anymore.
I think I may have made a mistake in pushing him away.
I miss him, and I miss the way we were with each other.
The look of devastation on his face when we were in the club bathroom hasn’t left me.
Why has the big doofus gotten under my skin so much?
Why am I so damn emotional lately? I cry every night in bed while downing a pint of ice cream, too tired to go out.
Per his idea, I wore a tight, leather Black Widow costume as my gameday walk-in outfit for my first game back. It. Was. Genius. The internet flipped.
After that, every designer on the planet reached out about dressing me for my gameday outfits. I basically have my choice of anything I want to wear, and it’s sent to me immediately for free. Some even pay me to wear their clothes.
I texted him about it to thank him, and he responded with a thumbs-up emoji, which is basically more of an FU emoji than the middle finger one. I suppose I can’t blame him, given the way I treated him, but it still hurt. I wanted to share it with him. To celebrate with him.
I’ve done my best to put my head down and focus on basketball. I’m having a career season. I’ve never played better. Our team chemistry is off the charts, and we’re on a collision course to make a run for the championship this year.
Kam is a fucking animal. She’s gotten me endorsement deal after endorsement deal.
I’ve never had this much money in my life.
I’m thinking about buying a house. Initially I thought I’d buy something near Sulley, but she barely lives in her house anymore.
She’s had some issues with crazy fans, so she sleeps at Vance’s almost every night.
Even though she insists it will never happen, I know it’s only a matter of time before she moves in with him.
I’ll wait until my off-season, but I’m ready to buy, and I couldn’t possibly be more proud or excited that I’m finally in a position to do so.
I’m stopping by Kam’s office on my way to practice this morning.
She said she may have a huge makeup endorsement opportunity for me and wants me to meet the head of marketing for the company.
I have no idea which one it is. She said she had to sign an NDA, and I would meet them in person after I signed one too.
But to say I’m excited about working with a makeup company would be the understatement of the century.
This is my lifelong dream. I’ve been fantasizing about the possibilities since she mentioned it.
I make my way up to reception, where a woman named Shannon greets me warmly. “Good morning, Ms. Jeffries. Ms. Hart is in her office in a meeting.” She slides over what appears to be a two-page contract. “She asked that you review this, sign it, and then join the meeting.”
I don’t know what the fuck I’m looking for. Shannon must sense my trepidation because she offers me a small smile. “Ms. Hart has reviewed it on your behalf. She said you should feel comfortable signing but should always review anything you sign as a matter of practice.”
I nod. “Thanks.”
I take a seat and pretend to read it for a few minutes. My head is too jumbled to comprehend anything. If Kam says it’s fine, that’s good enough for me. I sign it and hand it back to Shannon.
“Wonderful. You can head right in. They’re expecting you.”
I offer a quick knock before opening the door.
When I do, I notice two other people sitting in her office.
One is Jordie McNamara. I recognize her right away.
She’s the star of the new women’s football league.
She’s beautiful, with a wavy blonde ponytail and eyes that remind me of Fallon and Harper’s in their unique blue shade.
She looks like she’s a little younger than me, which makes sense because I think she recently graduated from college.
The man is remarkably attractive. He’s probably around Daylen’s age, but not nearly as big as my man.
Nope, Daylen’s not my man. My husband, yes. My man, no.
The stranger has stylishly messy dark-brown hair, blue eyes, and the cutest dimples you’ve ever seen that frame the huge smile he has on his face as he stands to greet me.
Holding out his hand, he warmly says, “Kennedy Jeffries. I’m so excited to finally meet you.
I have a little girl who watches your games.
My name is Phoenix Hale. Please call me Phoenix.
I’m the director of marketing at Hale Cosmetics. ”
Taking his hand in mine, I do everything I can not to scream with excitement like a lunatic. Hale Cosmetics is the top cosmetic company in the world. This is the gold medal of endorsements. If I could pick one endorsement, this would be it.
I look at Kam, and she grins widely. “I’m good at my job, aren’t I?”
“The best. Whatever they’re offering, I accept,” I immediately reply.
Kam’s face falls as she shakes her head and mumbles something about me being a terrible negotiator.
Phoenix barks out a loud laugh. “I think we’re going to get along just perfectly. Kennedy, do you know Jordie McNamara?” He points to her.
Jordie stands, and I realize she’s just as tall as I am. “No, it’s nice to meet you, Jordie. I’m excited to watch you play.”
Her face lights up. “Oh man, I love watching you. Are you sure you’re not better suited to play football? I’ve seen you take down quite a few players. You could be a linebacker.”
I shrug. “My father always said I’d make a great football player.”
She nods. “I think you would. I’m a huge fan of your dad’s too. I used to watch him as a little girl. It must have been cool growing up going to his games.”
Not as cool as you’d think, Jordie. Of course I don’t say that out loud. I pretend that having a superstar of a father was as fun as everyone assumes it would be.
Phoenix’s gaze toggles between me and Jordie.
“You were right, Kam. Both their eyes are uniquely gorgeous in totally different ways. And both have such full lips,” he admires, but not in a creepy way.
“I have a million ideas churning through my head right now. This campaign is going to be special. Two talented superstar female athletes with model good looks? The possibilities are endless.”
Jordie cowers under the praise. I look at her in bewilderment. Phoenix notices and sighs. “She doesn’t love the cameras or wearing makeup, but we let her help create and find makeup that makes her comfortable. We even let her name it.”
I gasp. “Do I get to name it too?”
He chuckles. “I suppose I walked into that one. Absolutely. Why not?”
I’m internally doing cartwheels while trying to maintain a cool demeanor.
We sit and chat for about an hour about a few concepts. I’ve probably never been more excited about anything in my life. My melancholy mood of late is immediately lifted.
After they leave, Kam and I talk for a few more minutes. “Don’t fucking cockblock me in my negotiations,” she jokes. “Play it a little cooler moving forward.”
I giggle. “Crap, sorry. My bad. You should have told me who it was beforehand so I had time to calm down. I was flipping my shit when he introduced himself.”
She nods. “I understand. It’s a big deal. Fortunately, you and Jordie will get the same deal, which is very good.” She shows me the number, and I nearly faint. In fact, I actually get lightheaded, and she forces me to sit while Shannon fetches me a glass of water and a protein bar.
For the first time in weeks, I’m genuinely happy as I walk into practice. Sulley looks at me skeptically. “Why are you so happy? It’s weird.”
“Me? I’m always cheery.”
She raises an eyebrow. “Hmm. Seriously, you’re awfully smiley. Oh, you must have been with one of your Tinder guys. I’ve been calling you for, like, an hour. Now I know why you didn’t answer.”
“Calling me? I hate when people call my phone. I don’t use it for that. Text like a normal person.”
She giggles. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Why were you calling?”
She shrugs. “Just checking in on you. You’ve been kind of distant. I know I’ve been spending a lot of time with Vance, but I…umm…don’t want to lose our friendship. I’m just a little afraid to be in public right now with all the stalker crap going on.”
I throw my arm around her. “I know. We’re good. Honestly? I haven’t gone out at all lately. I’m trying to stay focused on our season and staying out of trouble.”
And I’m always exhausted and a little heartsick.
She wiggles her eyebrows. “Lots of Tinder guys coming by?”
Did I really used to spend so much time with Tinder men? I suppose I know the answer to that.
I shake my head. “Nah. No men and no liquor. I’m off all of it.” I thump my head. “I’m going for clear-headedness this year. Men and liquor fog the brain.”
Shay overhears us. “What? No men and no liquor for Kennedy? Has hell frozen over? You’ve been like a zombie lately. Are you sure you’re okay, sausage jockey?” she jokes.
I cross my arms. “Sausage jockey? Hmm. I kind of like that name.” Knowing they need me to be more like my normal self, I ask, “Speaking of liquor, how does a lesbian control her liquor?”
Shay bites back a smile. “How?”
“By her ears.”
The two of them laugh, and all is normal again.
I appreciate that they’ve noticed my off demeanor of late and were checking in on me, but I’m keeping things bottled up for now.
My therapist in Maine would disapprove, but that’s what I need to do for my own self-preservation.
It’s the only way I know how to handle things.
After practice, I’m in the training room with Fallon. She’s kneading and stretching my lower back. It’s been bothering me for a few days.
“Does anything else hurt?” she asks.
I move around a bit, testing my body. “Not right now. When my back flares up, I occasionally feel something between a shooting pain and numbness down my legs. It’s like pins and needles at times.”
“Oh,” she says knowingly, “it’s probably sciatica. It’s a nerve inflammation in the lower back that can impact the nerves down your legs. Lie down and put your legs straight out. I’m going to raise them one at a time. Tell me when the pain gets bad.”
After doing a few physical tests on me, she’s confident it’s sciatica.
“We’ll start with ice and then move to heat.
I’ll give you a few exercises which should help.
We don’t want to lose you for the playoffs.
I’d prefer you sit for a week or two sooner rather than later.
If it gets worse or moves to another part of your body, please tell me right away. ”
“I will. What causes it?” I ask.
“It could be a bunch of things. It’s not a lack of core strength for you, but it is for some. Same with obesity, which is obviously also not the cause for you. It could be overuse. Are you still doing those extra workouts?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“It’s probably that. I used to get it all the time when I was pregnant with Harper. Pregnancy is a known cause, but I assume it’s not that,” she says in a jovial tone.
And that’s the moment it hits me like a lightning bolt.
I haven’t gotten my period in a while. In fact, we’re over six weeks into the season, and I haven’t had it at all.
Never since I got my first period at age thirteen have I been anything but perfectly on schedule. Did I fuck up my birth control pills?
I practically leap off the table and grab my bag. Rummaging through for my cosmetic case, I pull out my pills and open them. No, everything is in order. Did I miss one? No, I didn’t. I never do.
Did I get drunk and throw up my pill? No, I haven’t been wasted since Vegas.
And then I remember the night with my brother and Booster. We all got a small bout of food poisoning. I was sick that night, and the next day was the day I had sex with Daylen. We didn’t use a condom for a few minutes.
Fallon walks over to me and notices the birth control pills in my hands. “Kennedy, could you be pregnant?”
I think I’m in shock. It takes me a while to respond, but when I do, I say, “I…I…I think I might be.”
She sucks in a breath. “Oh shit. Who’s the father?”
I’m completely speechless, at a loss for words as my brain starts to spin. My breathing becomes labored.
She places her hand on my back. “Relax, sweetie. Deep breaths. It’s going to be okay. Sit down. You look like you might faint.”
She helps me to sit, and I exhale a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “I…umm…wow. I can’t believe this.”
“Keep breathing,” she instructs while continuing to rub my back.
Once the room stops spinning, I blurt out, “I need to go.”
“Tell me what I can do to help,” she offers.
I shake my head. “I don’t know. I really have to go.” I stand and look at her. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
“Of course not.” She squeezes my arm one last time. “Don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here for you. You don’t have to do this alone. You have plenty of people who care about you.”
I nod robotically, still in shock. “Thank you.”
I practically sprint to my car. Do I buy a pregnancy test first, or do I tell Daylen first?
I don’t need a pregnancy test to tell me I’m pregnant.
I know in my core that I am. Besides being uncharacteristically late for my period, I’ve had obvious symptoms recently.
I’ve been tired, my breasts are tender and bigger, I’ve had some lightheadedness, and the sciatica.
Not to mention I’ve been horny as hell. I had assumed that was because of the dry spell, but it’s very clearly the potential pregnancy. How could I have been so blind?