Chapter 7 Scrollr-Shaped Hole
I stared at the text for at least thirty seconds. Maybe more.
“Well, I’ll be a cat in a box,” I muttered. My text-door neighbor had actually responded.
Me:
What makes you think everything isn’t okay?
text-door neighbor:
No one texts their text-door neighbor without a reason
And also that was a lot about the end of the world
Like a LOT
Wait is this for a meme or something?
Am I going to end up on Scrollr?
Me:
Omg no!
Well, I got the IDEA on Scrollr
But I actually deleted Scrollr
Literally seconds ago
I dropped my phone. I was sharing too much with someone I didn’t even know. Were they a kid? An adult? Mr. Duncan would be so disappointed.
text-door neighbor:
I don’t have Scrollr either
But everyone at school does
So I hear about the memes
Ah! School. Okay, that was a good sign. But … how to ask if they meant school, as in they attended school or school as in they taught school? Apparently, they didn’t have the same hangup about asking direct questions, though.
text-door neighbor:
How old are you?
I’m 13
If you’re an adult I’m going to just wish you good night and good luck
Oh, that was good! It probably wasn’t great that I’d only just now considered that I might have texted an adult. Or a serial killer. Or a wrathful god from another universe. Clearly, I wasn’t doing my best long-term thinking this week.
So finding out my text-door neighbor was my age—that was a huge relief.
Me:
I’m 13 too, actually
text-door neighbor:
Prove it
Me:
Uhhh
Okay
But we should both prove it
text-door neighbor:
Okay how?
Me:
Write your number on a piece of paper
Put the paper on a textbook
Selfie with the textbook in front of your face
Send at the same time
In 20 seconds
text-door neighbor:
Okay go!
I dove for my backpack, pulled out a scrap of paper and my algebra book, and quickly scribbled my number. Then I held everything in front of my face and turned my phone’s camera on selfie mode. I tapped the shutter button.
The photo was not good. My hand was clearly straining to grip the ridiculously heavy textbook. But my face was covered—only my messy hair was visible—so I sent it just as my text-door neighbor sent theirs.
Their photo was very similar to mine, but they were holding an English book—the same one we used in my English class, actually—and the hand holding onto it was bigger than mine, but not an adult’s.
There were hints of brown hair behind the book.
And beyond that, a blurry bookcase and dark blue curtains over a window.
I thought about saying we had the same English book, but … probably best not to. Safety first was something Mr. Duncan said on repeat, and I was vowing right now to do better than I’d done five minutes ago.
text-door neighbor:
Phase 2: same pose, but “hello text-door neighbor” and the date and time written on a piece of paper
30 seconds from go
Me:
OKAY GO
Once again, I scrambled for my backpack, grabbing a notebook and pen. I followed the instructions as fast as I could, took the photo, and hit send.
Theirs came through, too. Really messy handwriting. But hey, mine wasn’t much better.
text-door neighbor:
I think we both passed!
Me:
Well I knew I would
text-door neighbor:
I knew I would too
So what’s up?
Are you okay?
Me:
This is going to sound pathetic, but I’m in the market for a new best friend
I know that’s a lot to ask from some rando in my phone though.
text-door neighbor:
Whoa, yeah, we just met, so BEST is a big ask
But as it happens, I’m also looking for a friend
Me:
Yeah it’s too early for the best part of our friendship but we’ve got time
text-door neighbor:
You’re awfully sure of yourself!
I don’t even know your name!
Me:
Nor will you!
But you can call me Cardinal
I’m a girl
text-door neighbor:
A good bird!
The state bird of Virginia, in fact!
Me:
Oh I am aware!
text-door neighbor:
I’ll go by … Knight Errant.
Probably Knight for short
I’m a boy
Me:
I like it
I’m updating your contact card
NOW with your full title.
Knight Errant:
Okay this works FOR NOW
But I don’t think I can call you my BEST friend until we’re at least on a first-name basis
Me:
Okay that’s reasonable
Maybe one day we’ll get there
Knight Errant:
So now that we’re beginning our glorious journey to best friendship … who are you?
Not your name. Obviously not that. But like … who are you as a person? I feel like this is something I should know. As your future BFF.
I laughed a little—something I wouldn’t have thought possible an hour ago. It was amazing that he’d just … agreed. Future BFFs. He was probably just humoring me, but still. It was kind.
Me:
I don’t know right now
If you’d asked me yesterday, I would have had an answer. At least part of one. But today it’s more complicated.
Knight Errant:
Ah, the end of the world thing makes sense now
It sucks how everything can just change like that
In one moment
And your whole identity is just … different suddenly
Okay so let’s start with the BASIC basics. What do you like doing? What are your hobbies?
Oh boy. Hobbies? In this emotional crisis?
Well, I couldn’t say recommending books to strangers at the Deer Hill library. Safety first. And aside from writing reviews with “Four Takes”—which wasn’t my hobby anymore!—what did I have?
Across the room, a small rigid heddle loom leaned on the wall.
I’d won it, plus a bunch of accessories and cones of yarn, at Winter Jolly-Days a few years ago.
It had been a donation from an estate, which meant the original owner had died and I was potentially weaving on a haunted loom.
But, haunted or not, it was my loom, and I’d woven scarves. So many haunted scarves.
And then … I’d stopped. My friends weren’t interested in handmade winter accessories and my family had more than enough. Plus, I didn’t have time to weave anymore.
Actually, maybe I did now.
I couldn’t tell Knight about it, though. Weaving was awfully specific and I didn’t know anyone else who did it.
Me:
I’ll tell you about my main hobby when we’ve known each other more than ten minutes.
Because it’s kind of weird.
Knight Errant:
Bungee jumping?
Soap carving?
Ghost hunting?
Book binding?
Collecting rubber bands?
Me:
WHAT???
Lololol
No it’s none of those
But tbh book binding might be cool
Knight Errant:
Okay so it’s none of those very reasonable hobbies
You have to give me something, though
Me:
Wait tell me what YOUR hobbies are
Now that I’m not scrolling Scrollr I think I need to find one
To replace the Scrollr shaped hole in my neural pathways
Knight Errant:
I like to read
And draw
And I have a secret hobby that I’m not telling you about yet because we just met and apparently we’re already keeping secrets
Me:
I guess that’s fair but …
I ALSO LIKE TO READ!
Knight Errant:
Was that the weird hobby??
You know reading isn’t weird, right?
Me:
No that’s not the secret one. I just forgot it’s a hobby. Because READING IS A WAY OF LIFE
Knight Errant:
When you’re right you are RIGHT!
What are you reading now?
I sent a photo of the cat page from the quantum physics book.
Knight Errant:
Uhhmmm
Is this physics???
Are you a genius?
Me:
No I’m a cat person
I got catfished into borrowing this book from the library
Because it had a cat on the cover.
But I think I like superposition too, now that I’ve read about it
I like that two outcomes can be real until the situation is observed.
It’s comforting.
Knight Errant:
I can see how that would feel safe
Me:
You said you also like to draw
You should draw a cat in a box for me
It’s what a future best friend would do
Knight Errant:
Wow okay
I can see our friendship is going to take up a lot of my life
Me:
Let’s GOOOOO
Knight Errant:
Okay okay.
But I feel like you will also owe me some kind of art.
In exchange.
I AM NOT A DRAWING FACTORY, CARDINAL
Me:
OKAY FINE
I guess …
Knight Errant:
Yes????
Me:
Yesterday, I took a photo I kind of like
Knight Errant:
New hobby to replace the Scrollr shaped hole in your neural pathways?
Can I see the picture?
I swiped over to my photo of Grayson and looked at the lights, the lines, the expression on his face. And, for a moment, I let myself think about the way I’d felt when he’d sat next to me: the flutter in my stomach, the warmth at his perfect smile, the way his knee had brushed mine.
Too bad it was that moment my life had begun its descent into chaos and ruin.
Me:
It’s of a person actually so I shouldn’t share it.
Knight Errant:
That’s fair
What about another photo?
Send that instead
I bit my lip and scrolled through other photos I’d taken, but most of them were of my ex-friends. Mental note: Delete them.
Me:
I don’t have any other photos I like as much … BUT I will take a new one tomorrow and send it
Knight Errant:
So is photography going to be your new, non-weird hobby?
Me:
Maybe!
I could give it a try anyway
Knight Errant:
That’s the spirit!
He didn’t say anything else, so I swiped around on my phone for a minute, automatically searching for Scrollr in spite of what I’d just said. My brain knew that Scrollr was gone, but the habit wasn’t going anywhere.
Next, I checked my messages. Nothing. Just the same ones I’d ignored earlier.
I tapped the Four Takes chat and skimmed, feeling sicker as I scrolled back in time.
There was one from Kat complaining that Luke had terrible taste in music and she hoped he went deaf from listening to it too loud, and one from Mary Heather announcing that she wanted to start a scroll in honor of all the losers at Deer Hill Middle School but unfortunately there were just too many.
And … I’d laughed at those.
I really was terrible.
But so were they. This was my proof. I couldn’t just get rid of it.
My phone buzzed again.
Knight Errant:
I thought about making you wait until tomorrow, but it seems like you need this now.
It’s still rough though!