Chapter Twenty-Nine
Wylder
Silence roared louder than the wind and rain beating against the terrace door windows. Emily stared up at him, uncomprehending his words.
“You expect me to have your heart but not give you mine in return?” she whispered, her voice trembling. “I cannot bear that, Wylder. It-it would hurt far too much. If we cannot be together, then you must let me go.”
Wylder’s breath in his throat caught like a man dragged back from drowning. His grip tightened on her hand, keeping her prisoner as every stone constructing the walls within him crumbled into dust.
He’d told himself for years to stay away. To honor her brother’s wishes. But he could no longer ignore the fire clawing at his insides. Her plea that he should let her go, her eyes wet with unshed tears and lips parted as if to take those damned words back, broke Wylder’s will.
“I cannot do it,” he growled, his voice rough. “I cannot hide from the world that you are everything I want. You, my sweet, stubborn minx, own me. Do you understand that? You own me.”
Emily’s breath hitched as his words crashed over her, but still, Wylder did not stop with his confession. He careened into it full force, eyes wide open to the possibility Emily might reject him regardless of his sincerity.
“I love you. Dear God, Emily. I ache incessantly for you. And Simon is right… I’m not worthy of you, but none of that matters when you look at me.
None of it matters when you smile at me.
I’d fight him, fight the whole damned world, if that’s what it takes to have you for my own.
” He spoke against her lips, pressing her hand harder against his heart while inhaling her sweet scent.
“Every breath, every drop of blood within me, it’s yours.
Every filthy, depraved piece of me belongs to you.
So, if you think I can stop loving you, you are wrong.
You are the only thing keeping me alive.
The only thing in my life worth living for. Worth dying for.”
“Please, don’t do this.” Emily’s lower lip trembled, but she did not pull away. “Do not toy with me, Wylder.”
The gossamer-thin thread of mistrust in her voice shattered him, and the last vestiges of his fragile restraint snapped free.
With a low, guttural sound, he cupped her face in the palm of his hand.
“I tried so damn hard to stay away from you. God knows I’ve tried.
But it’s impossible.” Hungry and desperate, his mouth crashed down upon hers in a fierce kiss.
And the sweetness of her lips was a reminder that he’d been starving all of his life, and now a taste of true paradise lay just within reach.
Emily moaned in response, and Wylder deepened the kiss, his lips and tongue devouring and claiming her as his own. When her hand clenched around his fingers, holding onto him tighter as if she was afraid to let go for fear the moment would evaporate into the mist, he shuddered with need.
Finally tearing his mouth away, he leaned into Emily, pressing his forehead against hers.
“Tell me you love me, Emily,” he whispered, raw and anguished.
His free hand curved around her face, careful of the tender bruise that marred her cheek.
“Tell me you love me and I’ll never let you go again.
Not for your brother. Not for your parents nor my own. Not for the world.”
“Then don’t let me go, Wylder,” she said in a soft voice, tilting her head back and staring up at him with heavy, molten blue eyes.
“You know I love you with all of my heart.” Her pale face glowed in the dimness of the room, her hair a dark, curling mass of silk cascading over her shoulders.
Wylder’s heart twisted with yearning for this woman.
She was so beautiful… so very sweet and soft. And now, she was his.
Well, not entirely his. It would still require sliding a ring onto her finger before he could truly claim her as his own. He wanted to call Emily Blackthorne his wife as soon as possible. He’d already waited too long.
“Will you marry me?” he asked softly, still unsure of her answer, but he needn’t have worried overmuch. Emily giggled and nodded, pressing a kiss against his lips.
“I will, Wylder. But only if you can promise this is not a laudanum-induced dream? That you are truly here and holding me?” Her lilting, breathless question was half-serious, half-teasing.
“If it were not for your injury, I would do more than hold you,” Wylder murmured.
Shifting Emily over, he slid down on the bed until he was reclining on his side and facing her.
His arms wrapped around her body, carefully positioning her wrist so that it was protected from any further injury.
Resting his head on the pillow beside hers, he kissed the tip of her nose.
Emily sighed in contentment and snuggled closer.
“I have no objections, my lord,” she whispered. “To anything you wish to do with me.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, my little minx. And in doing the things I wish to do, I would unintentionally cause you the wrong kind of pain. I am content to simply hold you and dream of the day I may call you my wife.”
“But, Wylder, when will that be?” Emily bit her bottom lip, her eyes now brimming with sudden apprehension. “What if—”
“If you are worried that I will change my mind, I won’t,” Wylder interrupted with an index finger laid across her plump lips.
“You will be my wife, Emily. And with obscene haste, once I have secured a special license. I do not doubt that, given the influence of myself, my father, and yours, one will be issued without delay. And should the archbishop refuse my request, I will carry you away to Scotland and make you my bride in Gretna Green.” He nibbled at her lips with a languid seduction, enticing her to kiss him back as he swallowed any further questions she might have asked.
“Now, be still and let me kiss and caress you until you fall asleep.”
*
Wylder lay with Emily for a long while. They whispered of plans and dreams, of what their future would bring until she shifted within the circle of his arms, a whimper of discomfort escaping her.
Although she stubbornly protested that she was not in great pain, he convinced her that she must take a half dose of laudanum.
Soon, she was drifting off into sleep while Wylder stroked her hair and murmured endearments in her ear.
He dozed off until Emily muttered something in her sleep, waking him at once.
Turning toward him, she drowsily buried her face in the crook of his neck and threw an arm around his neck.
Her soft breath feathered his chin, reminding Wylder of the numerous kisses they’d shared over the last few hours.
But the interlude had come to its end. If he did not make his exit soon, there was the possibility of being discovered in her rooms when the maid came to stoke the fire.
Using great care, Wylder rose from the bed while repositioning Emily’s head so that she lay cradled in the pillow’s downy softness.
She slept soundly, the only sign of disturbance evident in the slight furrow marring her brow.
Wylder relished the odd pang of tenderness piercing his heart as he gazed down at her.
Leaving her was difficult, but necessary.
Moving away from the bed, he straightened his rumpled clothes and glanced toward the terrace doors.
It was nearing dawn. Now that the rain had stopped, the sky was a lovely mix of dark and light blue colors, the puffy clouds illuminated with swashes of gold, pink, and purple, and fading stars.
Bending low, he pressed a kiss to the top of Emily’s dark head. “Sleep well, my sweet love.”
He slipped out of her bedroom, gently closing the door behind him.
For a moment, he stood there, contemplating how much his life and Emily’s would change now that he had succumbed to his love for her.
Things were going to be so different from this point on.
Smiling to himself, he anticipated the chaos that would come from making Emily his wife.
Intending to make his way back to his room he immediately drew up short at the sight before him.
Simon stood in the corridor, blocking the way with his arms crossed and eyes blazing with blue fire.
“I suspected you would be here, Wylder.”
Wylder sighed heavily, leaning against Emily’s door and observing Simon from beneath hooded eyes. “I merely came to check on her… to ascertain for myself her recovery. Once she agreed to become my wife, I did nothing more than hold her until she fell asleep.”
“You just couldn’t stay away from her, could you?
After years of swearing that you would not touch her…
that you would not pursue her… you betrayed our friendship.
” Simon’s accusations stung like gunshots, and he glared at Wylder as if he wanted nothing more than to execute his friend right there on the spot.
“I tried staying away, Simon. It proved an impossible task.” Wylder did not look away. He met Simon’s furious gaze with a calm strength. “But, regardless of your feelings on the subject, your sister and I will be wed.”
“You cannot possibly love Emily as she deserves to be loved,” Simon scoffed. “You don’t even know what that emotion is. Your sole interest lies in treating her as if she’s just another one of your whores. Or maybe you pursue this union because it’s an easy way of covering your father’s debts?”
Wylder’s anger ignited in a blaze. Pushing off the wall, he rushed toward Simon and, before his friend could react, he punched him square in the jaw. “Speak of my future wife with such disrespect again,” he snarled, “and I will knock your teeth out and serve them to you in a soup.”
Simon wobbled on his feet but did not go down with the force of the blow.
Gritting his teeth, he swung wildly in retaliation, landing a glancing blow to Wylder’s midsection.
The impact knocked Wylder back a few steps, which opened some space between them.
The two men stood silently, facing one another.
Two best friends finding themselves at odds over a woman they both cared deeply for.
“Do you truly love her?” Simon heaved, brushing a hand over his busted lip. Worried anguish for his sister made his voice harsh. “Do you love her, goddammit?”
Wylder raked a hand through his disheveled hair, glancing back at Emily’s bedroom.
Hopefully, she’d slept through the brief ruckus right outside her door.
“Yes, you hardheaded jackass. I love her. I love her with every drop of blood in my body. I love her more than you can possibly comprehend.” He regarded Simon with more than a bit of sympathy.
“You cannot understand it until you experience it, Simon. I don’t care what happens to me.
I don’t care if the world ends as long as Emily is with me when it happens.
” His laugh was self-deprecating. “Lucien was right, after all. This is like nothing I’ve ever experienced or will ever experience.
I suppose it’s true. When a rakehell falls in love, it’s all-consuming. ”
“Have you compromised her?” Simon choked out, his face red with embarrassment at the intimate question. It competed with the darkening bruise beginning to bloom across his jawline. “Your life depends on your answer, Wylder.”
Wylder stared at Simon, unsure if he should take the threat seriously. But he answered slowly and truthfully. “She is untouched, Simon. I never allowed the situation to go too far.”
Simon slumped, relief evident as he leaned against the wall for support. “Then there is still time to talk some sense into her. To stop her from making the greatest mistake of her life.”
“If you think you can talk Emily out of it, you do not know your sister very well,” Wylder drawled, striding past Simon in dismissal of his words. “And if you think you’ll stop me from taking her as my wife, then you must know the only way of accomplishing that is if you manage to kill me.”
“As you wish, Wyldewood.”
Wylder turned, mildly surprised by the conviction in Simon’s tone.
“Think upon your words carefully, Simon. I entered into a marriage contract for your sister’s hand with your father’s enthusiastic blessing.
It is binding in the eyes of English law.
You cannot stop this. You shouldn’t want to stop this.
I love Emily. I will be a good husband to her, and she will never want for anything as my wife. ”
Simon’s features were carved from stone. “And your… proclivities? Will you continue visiting places like The Scarlett Petticoat? Because if you do, you most certainly will be unfaithful to her. And that is unacceptable.”
“I’m not discussing intimate matters regarding my future wife with you, Simon.
Suffice to say, I’ve no intention of becoming a philandering husband, nor will my particular brand of desire go unsatisfied.
” Wylder walked back to Simon and gripped his friend’s shoulder in subtle warning.
“Either we continue from this point as enemies or as brothers, old friend. I hope like hell it is as brothers, but this decision is yours to make. Not mine. But, and mark my words well, Simon, Emily will be my wife. Your father is hopeful to announce our engagement tomorrow evening. I’m leaving immediately for London where I shall apply for a special license from the archbishop. ”
Simon jerked free of Wylder’s grip. “I told you once, long ago, that if you ever laid a hand on my sister, I would demand that you answer for it. And now that day has come. I don’t give a damn if you obtain a special license.
I don’t care if you obtain a marriage contract.
I don’t even care that my sister loves you or that you say you love her.
This is a matter of honor to be settled between the two of us, and settle it we shall.
When you return, be prepared to meet me in Cedar Alley, where we shall put this to rest. I suggest you locate a second willing to stand with you as I intend to ask Lucien to serve as mine. ”