CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Frida droned on about my nutritional deficiencies and overall inadequacy but congratulated me on my optimal dopamine and oxytocin. I tuned her out while I ate my meal. I dumped the supplements into my hands, tracing the outline of each one.
Yesterday Frida claimed they had been altered to calm me. Why had the Reaper attacked the building containing them?
My oxytocin and dopamine levels were elevated, but I hadn’t taken the supplements yesterday. It didn’t make sense. What were these supplements really for? What did the rebellion know?
I turned them over in my hand as Frida finished her report.
She didn’t mention anything about my MIND going off the grid yesterday.
I breathed a sigh of relief. The lesson was another dance, but I was so distracted by what might be happening in the Underworld that I found it hard to enjoy it.
After the lesson I threw on my coat, and with it, my anxiety returned.
Lo and I sat together on the way to work; for once, she was quiet.
I wondered if that meant Gregory still hadn’t reached out, but I didn’t ask.
At work, no one in dark green barged in to take me away for going to the Underworld.
Collin didn’t message me. Hal didn’t show up.
I went home at the end of my shift, but there was no news, and my nerves were in tatters.
Lo came up, and we discussed contracts a bit before she left. She seemed distracted, but so was I. I checked my Comm Device, but still nothing.
I dreamed of a long dark tunnel with a light at both ends, eerily quiet.
I was running toward the light, yet never getting closer.
My ragged breaths were the only noises until I heard my name whispered in the darkness.
I ran harder, my footsteps reverberating through the tunnel, my name getting louder, louder—
I awoke drenched in sweat, utterly alone.
A WEEK PASSED IN A BLUR. I REMAINED IN THE DARK, NO WORD from either side, and fear was eating me alive.
Each day, I returned to my living quarters at the end of my shift, and anxiety crawled in bed with me each night.
Lo kept her distance, claiming she was tired, which suited me fine.
I was in no mood for company. Sleep provided no reprieve from my fear.
My exhausted mind urged me to bed each night only for the black tunnel to swallow me whole, my whispered name a haunting that left me reeling.
I had hardly been able to eat or even focus on pressing the delete button at work, any relief that I usually found from the art eluding me.
I could only spiral, wondering helplessly whether the Illum had been successful in their raid of the Underworld, or if the rebels had indeed been as prepared as they had said.
Even if they were, I knew the Illum would be as well.
My wrist still glowed gold, so I supposed that meant I was still in the contract, and Collin was alive.
The only deviation in the monotony of my existence had been several lessons preparing me for my menstrual cycle.
The supplements discontinued our cycle while we waited for contracts.
Once approved, our cycle returned. Frida had made its impending arrival sound insignificant.
She had been wrong. I spent my two days off huddled in a ball while my cycle’s return leveled me, the cramping in my guts unbearable.
On the sixteenth day of the tenth lunar cycle, I turned the corner to my office. I was still in the menstrual phase, no longer doubled over from cramps, thankfully.
“Hey, Moonlight.”
Starburst eyes sparkled at me. Relief flooded me, finding Hal in my chair, his dark blond locks disheveled, falling into his face. He half-smiled, revealing his dimple.
The dark cloud that had followed me all week finally lifted. I dropped my bag to the ground, moving toward him, but stopped as he gingerly made to stand, grasping my desk.
“Hal! Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” he said, but remained bent over, bracing himself on my desk.
“Sit down,” I commanded, grabbing his free arm and directing him back to the chair. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” Hal said again.
“It’s not nothing, you fucking martyr,” came an exasperated voice behind me.
I whipped around to find Barrett half hidden behind my open door, dressed in a black shirt and dark green pants.
His red hair was pulled back, exposing a fang earring.
He had stubble on his chin and dark circles under his emerald eyes.
Weapons were strapped to his legs and on a harness over his shoulders.
His golden chain necklaces winked at me.
“Hi again. You need to be more aware of your surroundings,” Barrett told me.
“I told you, Barrett, that you could only come if you kept your mouth closed,” Hal growled from the chair.
“Right,” Barrett scoffed, pushing off the wall, “and like I told you when I found your sorry ass trying to hobble all the way here, you wouldn’t make it if you didn’t have help. So you’re welcome.” He paused at the door. “Make it quick. Things aren’t like before.”
“Thank you,” I told him before he could leave.
Barrett nodded. “Don’t forget what Thea said, Hal. No physical activity at all for at least another week. Afraid you’ll have to keep this reunion more subdued than your last one.” Barrett’s eyes flashed mischievously. Hal rumbled next to me as Barrett chuckled the entire way out.
I perched on the edge of my desk, my cheeks red. “You told them?” I asked, embarrassed.
“No, Kane did,” Hal said, clutching his side and taking a deep breath, the pain evident on his face.
“You shouldn’t have come, Hal. You should have rested.”
“You sound like Barrett now,” Hal said, rolling his eyes.
“Maybe he’s right.”
“Don’t let him hear that. It’ll go straight to his head.”
“Too late” came Barrett’s amused voice from the hall.
Hal dragged his hand through his hair, huffing something between a laugh and a growl. “I thought you said you were leaving.”
“I said no such thing. I just left the room. You can barely stand. I’m not leaving you alone.
Thea is already going to kill me for bringing you,” Barrett said.
I glanced back at Hal to see his lips tugged up in a half smile.
He was in a white shirt and gray sweatpants. I couldn’t see any weapons on him.
“What happened?” I asked again, leaning toward him.
Hal rolled the chair toward me until I was between his legs on the desk.
His hand found the outside of my thigh, and warmth seeped into me, chasing away the uncertainty of the last week.
“I have been so worried. I thought . . . I thought horrible things.”
“It’s why I came,” Hal said. “I didn’t want you to worry.”
Our eyes met for a moment. “Tell me what happened, and who’s Thea?”
“Thea is our best healer,” Hal said. My brows pulled in. “A healer is someone who takes care of injured and sick people. They used to be called doctors. Majors get hurt from the manual labor a lot.”
It was strange to think of the body getting hurt. It was unheard of on the surface.
“The Force attacked the Underworld like you said they would,” he continued.
“Thankfully they don’t know the extent of the tunnel system like they think they do.
We cut all the power below. They weren’t ready for that.
Not all of them had night vision. They came during the day, thinking we were all nocturnal.
Gave us an advantage. So did you telling us about the river entrance. ”
“Really?”
“We had planned to smuggle some supplies out using the river. Our scouts saw a small Force Unit there the day of the attack. We had to scrap the plan. It’s unfortunate and puts us behind, but the supplies weren’t harmed or confiscated. We owe you.”
“Did anyone get hurt?” I asked, catching my lip between my teeth.
“More of them than us,” Hal told me, his left thumb rubbing absent-minded circles on my thigh.
“Your friends?”
“They are all okay. Gerald needed a couple of stitches. Bri, Kane, and Barrett came out unscathed.”
“Unscathed?” Barrett’s outraged voice floated in. “I dislocated my pinky finger on my trigger hand. I would hardly call that unscathed.”
“And the Reaper?” I asked.
“He’s fine.”
I paused. “And you?”
“I’m fi—”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Barrett erupted, walking back into the office.
“Your little hero here pulled some of our guys out of the way of an explosive that sent a metal barrier hurtling into him, pinning him between the barrier and the tunnel wall as they swarmed in, causing several broken ribs and internal bleeding. If Kane and Bri hadn’t been there—”
Hal had stopped rubbing my thigh as he glared at Barrett.
“No one asked for your input,” Hal barked.
“Hal, you do her no justice keeping her in the dark,” Barrett protested, and gratitude surged in my chest.
“I can decide that,” Hal said.
“I think it’s the wrong call.”
“Hal, tell me,” I said quietly.
“No.” Hal gently gripped my thigh. “I can’t tell you, Emeline. Not now. The less you know, the better. If they question you, you won’t be able to answer them. I will not let them take another thing I care for.” My heart swelled as my stomach dropped. Care for.
Barrett stood by the door, his mouth a thin line, but his eyes held a sad understanding. He didn’t push Hal.
“Hal, I told the Starlings I’d help them. I need to help.” I didn’t know how I would get through being around Collin and the Elite otherwise. How I’d be able to live with myself.
“That was before the Reaper deemed you off-limits,” he said.
“Fucking birds,” Barrett mumbled at the same time.
“Can’t you just change the Reaper’s mind?” I asked.
“I’m not willing to consider it,” Hal told me, and I looked at him, hard.
Before I could push further, Barrett turned to Hal. “We should go. We can’t stay.”