17. Hollis
A smarter man would have waited, but I never claimed to be one.
Not when it comes to someone I care about.
Il Padrone looks so…defeated. The despair in his blue eyes has me wincing, and I almost take a step back, but I hold my ground.
Dropping my hand from his shoulder, I square mine, ready to face the consequences of my actions.
The cucciolo deserves better from me than waiting until what’s convenient to me. Especially since there’s no such thing as the “right” time to tell someone something like this.
“I love him,” I say simply, not flinching under that burning gaze.
“You love him,” Il Padrone says slowly, pain and disbelief in his tone.
“Yes,” I reply. “I won’t apologize for it. He is…amazing.”
“Why are you telling me this now ?” There’s a bite to his words, but if I’m supposed to feel chided, he’s going to learn that doesn’t quite work with me.
Some sleep, food, being able to see Ten this morning, and a night spent with my other two lovers, it has all invigorated me.
Maybe Benjamin was too hasty in giving me a wakeup call. I’m sure if he knew this would happen, he would have hesitated. Or maybe not. After all, he only ever has Emilio’s best intentions at heart.
“Because you deserve honesty,” I tell him simply. “And so does the cucciolo.”
Il Padrone raises a brow at my words. I’m sure he never expected his Death to be called a “little puppy”. “I can’t deal with this right now,” he finally says, shaking his head and looking back to the boy on the bed.
“I’m sorry, but it couldn’t wait. He is too important to me.”
“Am I supposed to be grateful for your honesty? Or that you touched something that isn’t yours?”
“No, I’d kill first and ask questions later if I were you. But…you know who Emilio is, far better than anyone else. Remember that while you’re plotting my demise.”
Casting another look at Emilio, I desperately wish I could stay, but I know I’ve already worn out my welcome.
Coming in here was a risk, one I needed to take, but staying, as much as I desperately want to, would be a death sentence.
Taking a chance, I reach out and run my fingers gently over Emilio’s cold ones, vowing that if we live through Il Padrone’s punishment, I’ll let him touch me all over, the next time we’re together—demand it even.
“I’ll leave you be now. And…I’m sorry. Not for falling in love, but for telling you like this. If it could have waited, if there were any other way, please believe that I would have told you differently.”
“How generous of you,” he says coldly.
“I do respect you and your position, Padrone. So does Emilio. He did the best he could, given the circumstances.”
One last brief touch to Emilio’s hand, and I move away. Before leaving the room, I stop by Tennant’s prone form. Desperately wishing he was able to hold me through this, but I agree with Doc’s choices, as hard as they are. Tennant wouldn’t have allowed himself to properly heal if he was awake.
Bending down, I press a kiss to his forehead. “I need you, Love.”
Straightening, I don’t look back as I leave two-fourths of my heart behind.