Chapter 14
Gazing into her eyes, I lose myself in her. There’s nothing but pleasure and the need to bury myself in her—never to come out and be found again. I am sheathed in paradise.
She wraps her legs around my back, her fingers digging into my arms. I am teetering on the edge of something I have never experienced before—unbound pleasure.
“What does my girl want?”
Mine , fuck me. Her light and beauty keep all my demons at bay, taking over my insides until she is all I bow to.
“You.”
That one word pierces my chest, and I intertwine our fingers. There’s not an inch of skin that isn’t touching, yet it’s not enough. I want to fuck myself so deep in this woman that I corrupt her every cell until she’s mine and mine alone.
We’re connected physically—limbs entangled in carnal bliss—but there’s more. Something visceral I can’t pinpoint. I don’t know what’s happening or why she feels so different—so good.
I am giving her something I’ve given no one else: permission to touch and free rein over my body. But she’s not content with only that, my greedy girl. She arches her back, pushing me even deeper inside her. I am going to take full advantage of tonight, fucking her until I fuck her right out of my system.
A deep moan escapes her lips, and I can’t abstain from tasting her succulent mouth. I’ve kissed her so many times I could recreate the shape and fullness of her lips with my eyes closed.
“You feel so good inside of me. So good…” she says, all sultry, a flush coloring her face.
I don’t want this night to end, and I try to prolong the inevitable, but I have no control when it comes to her. She’s the only other woman I’ve ever come for. The difference is I want to come inside of her and give her everything in me.
We have just one night when I want to take her in every way humanly possible. Or I could give in and hide that part inside of me, just like I have done for years. But she’ll dig deeper. I gave in not even one hour after she proposed I take her virginity. She’s the war I can’t win. My demons retreat in the back of my mind, knowing her innate power to chase them away.
My mouth traces down her neck, nibbling the sweet spot of her pulse. Then I bite into it, sucking gently while her nails trail down my back, marking me just as I do her. I have taken her missionary, on her tummy, on her side. Touched, kissed, and licked every inch of her. I’ll do it again and again all night long.
Our bodies move in perfect synchrony, her every thrust matching my own intensity. There’s a frenzy as we come together, both chasing that same high.
“So fucking beautiful, so fucking perfect, kitten. How are you holding up?”
A sheen of sweat covers us both, but she hasn’t asked for a break. When girls realize they can’t make me come, they just give up eventually.
A soft smile grazes her lips, and then she seeks my mouth while her body undulates under me. I roll us over, and she’s on top of me—the view is mouthwatering. From her shiny hair cascading down her back to her slender neck and a round handful of tits, topped by two sweet pink nipples, down her narrow waist to the apex of her thighs, she captivates me—a goddess, bearing pure life and my salvation.
She grinds on top of me, moving her hips and watching me—wanting to give me pleasure. She does. I never even believed I could experience it.
Tugging at her nipples, I pinch them, testing her and punishing her for wrecking my composure. A shiver runs through her as she palms my chest, holding on to me. She likes it, maybe because there’s an undeniable truth: she’s my unraveling. I can fight it all I want, but that won’t change the fact.
This position might be the one to undo me. I still have a bit of cum left in me, but I’m saving that until I can’t control myself any longer.
With my hands splayed over her tiny waist, I lean over to suck on her nipples, and then her walls squeeze me. Her head falls back as she comes. She says my name so reverently and low that emotions punch at my chest. I can’t stop drinking her up—a painting of sunshine and feminine grace.
Gripping her waist, my entire body pulls taut as my release shoots out of me and straight into her cunt—filling her up.
A possessiveness like no other grips me in its merciless tentacles, poisoning my head with the impossible. I want to be the only one for her. I need to be the only man she’ll ever have.
I fall back, spent, and pull her to me, caressing down her back. Both of us are breathing heavily, and she bites into her lip, looking unsure. I brush away some strands of hair sticking to her cheek, gazing into her sparkling aquamarine eyes.
I smirk. “Thoroughly corrupted.”
“Yeah, so thoroughly I don’t know how I’ll walk tomorrow.”
Chuckling, I place a gentle kiss on where her neck meets her shoulder, incapable of stopping myself. As if my kiss was an invitation, she rolls onto her stomach and rests her chin on her arm over my chest. This feels so natural—a familiarity I have no idea what to think of. Even if this is the first time we’re lying naked, all she has done is uncover me, layer by layer, until here I am—completely at the mercy of her desires.
It’s too much intimacy, and panic sets in—I slip out from under her. She scoots into a sitting position, her face scrunching up for a second.
I look down at my cock and notice blotches of red glistening with our combined releases. Her first. I was her first. My thoughts go on a rampage, pulling me in opposite directions.
I walk into her bathroom and wet a washcloth. She hasn’t stopped watching me. I don’t like that look—like she knew exactly how I would react and accepted it without a fight. It’s not her fight, anyway. It’s mine. I gave her what she wanted, and we established from the start that this would be a one-time thing. Even in my head, it sounds like a pile of bullshit. My feet stay rooted in place as if I am physically unable to leave her side.
Moving between her thighs, I push them apart.
She scoffs. “You don’t have to do this. Wouldn’t want it to make it even more of a chore than it already is.”
There it is, that sass again.
“I broke your pussy. I will tend to it,” I say, brooking no argument.
“Such a gentleman,” she mumbles.
“Maybe I should fuck you again. There was no sass, only moans and my name coming out of your mouth when my cock was plowing your cunt. And I certainly like that more.”
“We wouldn’t want you to break your holy rules.”
Holy . She’s so damn adorable. I bow down and place a soft kiss on her pussy, wishing for so many things—all of them impossible. When I finish cleaning her, I take a step back.
Every fiber in my body demands to get back in bed with her while I shove my legs in my pants and leave. Her sigh follows me, pouring more torment on my mind.
I am about to slip into my bedroom when Celine places a hand on my back.
“Don’t. I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I am getting used to that…”
Maybe I should just move away and put some distance between us. Secrets have a nasty tendency to come to light, and in close proximity, it’s bound to happen.
“I’m fine,” I grit out and walk into my all-black bedroom. Leaning back on my door, I slide down and put my face in my hands.
I am so bloody fine I want to burn my skin and escape the clutches of this dirt clinging to me.
Fuck you, Alice!
Fuck you!
***
Tossing and turning in bed, my mood gets worse with every damn hour I chase rest until my alarm rings, and I can stop the sham of sleeping.
I take my sweet time showering and getting dressed. I’m trying to avoid Bailey, not to face what she does to me.
When I go downstairs, the guys are in the kitchen, eyeing me intently. “What?”
“Someone is in a good mood,” Kaden says sarcastically.
“Not even fucking helps this guy.” Dane shakes his head. He has no filter, and I can’t even deny it. Fuck these walls.
I look around when Kaden says, “The girls accompanied Bailey to classes.”
Good. One less worry.
Blake pins me down with a hard stare. “If you hurt her, I’m going to bury you alive.”
“Spare me the big brother bullshit, will you?”
The nerve of this guy is astounding.
I get to the coffee machine and pour myself a cup, snatching the last muffin my sister baked just to piss Blake off.
I munch on it, staring outside the window. It’s a stormy, cloudy day, a perfect reflection of my inner world. Spring does whatever it wants—warm one day, then cold the next: sunny, then rainy—thoroughly indecisive.
My phone pings with a message from Bailey.
Can’t make it today for training.
Why?
I don’t need to give you an explanation.
The fuck she doesn’t.
I shove my phone back in my jeans and head to class. I am good at one thing, and that is what I am going to do for the Family. However, we must also uphold a societal position, which means leading companies. Studying business is just a means to an end. I’ve been juggling between what I present to the world and what I do in the shadows for so long that it’s become a part of me. This duality makes me who I am.
I take my seat in the last row as the economics professor walks in and starts the lecture.
Spring break is coming soon, and Cassandra will send us on a vacation. While I have been against that, maybe some days off will do me good, so I don’t have to watch Bailey all the time.
She is never far from my thoughts, but I can’t think straight now that I’ve experienced how she feels against me. I need to improve my mood, or I am going to explode.
At the end of the classes, I hop into my Audi R8 and drive to the shooting range. I am a regular, so everyone greets me as I go in. Grabbing ammunition, a Glock, and a rifle, I step into the soundproof room. Releasing all my frustration, I fire the gun, each pop pop followed by a whoosh as the bullets slice through the air. I keep going until the target is ripped to shreds. I don’t feel any better, though. Hours blur together as I try to purge my weakness. But it’s all in vain.
When I return to the house, silence greets me. Knowing Bailey, she’s huddled in her room and watching those screens. Just to make sure, I go upstairs and peek inside her room. As expected, she’s at her desk. Her head whips to me, and she purses her lips.
“I’m alive. Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.” When the kitten shows her claws, it does things to me I can’t even begin to comprehend.
“Are you sore?” I ask, stepping inside when I should fucking leave.
“No idea what you’re talking about,” she says hostilely, returning her attention to the screens and cutting me off.
I am sick to my bones, a walking contradiction—unsalvageable. Even though I asked that we never talk about what happened, it doesn’t sit right with me.
“Then why did you skip our training lesson today?”
She sighs, and there she is again—the Bailey who oozes vulnerability. She shrugs. “I just need some space, okay? I also was behind on a project.”
“Until Felix is caught, I can’t slack off with your training. Afterward, I’ll stay the fuck away.”
“I’m sure you can’t wait.”
Her phone rings with a text notification, and she shows it to me. “Look, my boyfriend is messaging me.”
“Don’t you bloody call him that.”
“He’s the only one I’ve got.”
She’s not sweet or innocent. She’s a seductress playing games, a very dangerous one, corrupting the fabric of my being.
“Could I have some privacy?” she even bats her lashes at me.
Curling and uncurling my hands at my sides, I plop on the edge of the bed, gesturing for her to go on.
She types a reply, and I ask. “What the fuck did he want?”
“To go over to his place.”
“What did you reply?”
Eyes locked, neither of us ends the staring battle. Meanwhile, I do a breathing exercise to calm down.
“What happened to your date?” she asks. She wants to play this fucking game? Let’s do it.
“Waiting for me to call her.”
“Such a lucky guy, aren’t you? Having all the girls get on their knees for you.”
“Jealous, kitten? Want to get on your knees for me?” I should have shot myself in the head when I had the chance.
“Would you like me to?” she rasps, and I swear every syllable drips with seduction.
Retreat. Bloody retreat.
“Stop.”
“You started it.”
Yeah, call me out on my idiocy. I deserve it.
She tilts her head, lost in thought. “Maybe we should do that after Felix is caught. Go on dates, live our lives.”
I crack my neck. A murderous energy courses through my veins—I could uproot the world and throw it off its axis.
“That’s a fabulous idea.”
“We’re going to be friends after all,” she says in a meek voice, her smile not genuine.
“We don’t have to be friends, Bailey. We are what we are…”
She nods, and I know I should leave. Instead, I rub my temples. A headache pulses behind them again.
She stands up and comes to me, moving between my spread legs. She places her hands on my cheeks and tips my head up. “What’s wrong?”
“I slept like shit and have a headache. At times, it’s too much…”
She hugs me, and I give in, pressing her to my chest tight enough to mold her to me. Her soft touch as she caresses my temples instantly soothes me.
“Do you want to sleep here? Maybe we can help each other, sleep I mean.”
“That’s not a good idea.”
Why the fuck don’t I leave already? I stay rooted in place as she walks into her bathroom and returns with a white pill and a glass of water.
“For the headache.”
“I trust you. If you kill me, who would you annoy this much?”
She snorts a laugh, stretching out her hand to me. I wash the pill down and return the empty glass to the bathroom.
Leaning against the bathroom door, she shifts on her feet but never breaks eye contact. I knew taking her virginity was a bad idea. One I will never regret, and while I can’t offer her much, I can fucking man up and be there if she needs me.
Pulling my shirt off me, I jerk my chin toward the bed. “Get in.”
The smile grazing her lips is so radiant she appears almost ethereal.
In just my boxer briefs, I climb into bed with her.
“Do you want to watch something?” she asks, chewing on her bottom lip.
“You pick.”
“Okay,” she says and opens her laptop, starting a wildlife documentary, her eyes fully riveted on the screen.
“Didn’t expect that.”
“It’s really interesting watching the animals’ behavior in their natural habitat, following their instincts. There’s no shame or judgment.”
We watch as a lioness rips into an antelope, and Bailey doesn’t even flinch, but she sighs deeply. “That’s the cycle of life.”
Not even a few minutes later, she’s bawling at the sight of cubs left alone with a hyena lurking nearby. She’s so stiff next to me that I mumble, “Of course you can’t sleep if you watch stuff like that.”
“Shh. Oh my god. Where is their fucking mother?”
I have never heard her swear. Her eyes flicker across the screen, hand clutching her chest.
“What was that about the cycle of life?”
She waves a hand in a shushing motion, but I lace our fingers together, and she squeezes mine whenever anticipation gets the better of her. While she’s absorbed in the documentary, I watch her instead. She’s so captivating and expressive.
After the documentary ends, she shuts the laptop’s lid and places it on her nightstand.
Her back is pressed against my chest, and my arm is wrapped around her belly. Holding her to me, I experience an odd sense of peace. Inhaling her strawberry scent with hints of vanilla and magnolia, I flick a strand of hair and rub my nose against the small hickey on her neck. I could beat my chest like a caveman. No wonder the Neanderthals didn’t survive in the long run, ruled by animalistic instincts to fight and mate.
“Don’t leave,” she says my name in a sleepy voice.
Even if I wanted to leave, I doubt I could—she feels like my custom-made home.
This night will be the last. Surely, it’s the remnants of my guilt. I should have stayed with her last night after I took her virginity instead of leaving.
When I drift to sleep, Alice grips my chin between her red nails, whispering to me, “Does she know what a good boy you are? Does she know you will always be mine?”
I try to break free, but I am bound, completely at her mercy. I put all my strength into escaping. For the first time, the binds break. I push her off, only to hear the softest voice pulling me back from the brink of despair—Bailey’s.
My eyes shoot open to find her on top of me, her palms cupping my cheeks. Breathing heavily, I scoot up, sweat drenching my chest.
“Shh, I’m here. It was just a nightmare.”
No, it bloody wasn’t.