Chapter 2
Some things can't be avoided.
I’d successfully avoided Monqilcolnen for almost the entire time we were docked at the station, besides glimpses of him in the canteen or spotting him in the corridors before fleeing in the other direction, but Seth and the rest of the royals were boarding tomorrow to begin our journey to Earth.
Before then, we had to take our skills tests and medical exam.
The Planetary navy required tests every three months on hand-to-hand combat, blaster proficiency, and a physical. The physical and grappling tests I wasn’t worried about; I was perfectly healthy and excellent in hand-to-hand combat. What I couldn’t do was fire a blaster to save my life.
Nine cycles after joining the navy, I still couldn’t hit the target with any skill.
I’d enrolled in the academy at fifteen, once entering the first phase of adulthood, on the recommendation of my government-appointed guardian.
It had been the best choice of my life, except for the star-begotten blasters.
I’d gotten eye exams, reflex tests, and anything else I could think of to explain my bad scores, but I was physically fine.
I was just the worst shot in the entire navy.
Even Seth was better than me, and he’d first held a blaster three cycles ago. Even Caleb, who said he didn’t believe in blasters—which made no sense to me as they existed, so how could you not believe in their mere existence?—could shoot better than me.
When I failed my upcoming test, and I would fail, I’d be required to take remedial classes.
Who taught the class? Why, the commander of the ship, of course.
Once a week for the entirety of the trip, I’d have to attend his class, because I would fail every retest. There would be no escaping him, no hiding from him.
Urgg clapped a hand on my shoulder, making my scales burn, but I remained standing, not even flinching.
The massive barbarus grinned at me, exposing the two tusks curling out of their mouth and over their top lip.
Their bristly black hair stuck straight up from the amount of times they’d run their fingers through it.
Urgg’s bulging arms were covered in the black swirling tattoos all barbarus had, though how the spirals curled depended on the clan as did the beaded leather armlet they wore.
“Are you excited for the exam?” Urgg asked, their voice loud and booming in the mostly silent training room. “Maybe someone will bleed or break a bone?”
I swallowed a whimper. Barbarus, much like us drakcol, had been a warring species prior to joining the Coalition of Planets. Like their fellow species members, Urgg loved fighting, drinking, and spilling blood. According to them, those things, plus vomit, bonded people together.
“Hopefully not,” I replied.
They slapped my back again, making my scales sting. Urgg never realized how strong they were. “Come on, it’ll be fun. Tomorrow Seth will be here, and we’ll all drink.”
That made me smile. Captain Talvax’s duties often took Urgg away, and Seth was becoming busier with human affairs, but for the next year or so, it would be like old times.
“We will.”
Urgg grinned, showing off their peg teeth. When the door opened, they glanced over their shoulder and said, “Oh, it’s Monqilcolnen. Do you think he’ll still call you ‘Ensign Puke?’”
A frown pulled on my lips at the dreaded endearment.
Three cycles ago, I’d gotten drunk in the canteen with Seth and Urgg and puked not once, not twice, but three times on Commander Monqilcolnen, then when I’d gotten sick on the planet Vx-98, I’d puked on him again.
The endearment had followed me for my entire stay on the Admiral Ven and after.
Any time one of my colleagues from the Admiral Ven saw me, they would call me Ensign Puke, and I would cringe.
The popularity of the story was Monqilcolnen’s fault.
He’d told everyone, and I had no idea why.
The commander wasn’t much of a talker as far as I knew, but he’d shared this one story over and over again.
And each time, it was like a claw to my self esteem, which normally wasn’t so fragile, but where the commander was concerned, I wanted to curl up and hide whenever he was near.
Urgg went to greet Monqilcolnen. They were close; they did travel together often, after all. This was without mentioning Captain Talvax’s close friendship with Empress Vyn, Monqilcolnen’s aunt.
Every time I heard the empress’s name, I wanted to shake my head.
Vyn. A single letter, like me. She came from the lowest social class and had lived on a small moon.
When Emperor Kontolmakqilnen, who’d been crown prince at the time, had sought the Crystal, it had sent him to Vyn.
Their love story seemed almost mythical to me.
I wasn’t sure what was fact or fiction. All I knew, it was hard to believe that Vyn, a one letter name with no social standing, was empress.
An elbow rested on my shoulder, making me flinch, and I shifted away. Camden smiled at me, not remarking on my movement.
I liked the human well enough, but we hadn’t discussed permissions, and he frequently touched me.
Humans touched indiscriminately; it was common among friends, family, and lovers to touch however the person wanted, whereas drakcol discussed what was welcome or not in every relationship.
Some people didn’t care to be touched, and I was one of them.
I didn’t mind a touch here and there, but not with the frequency Camden did.
When Seth boarded, I planned to ask him how to discuss permissions with Camden without hurting his feelings.
The human had been damaged in the past, though I wasn’t privy to the extent or even how, but his time on Xome couldn’t have been without trauma.
I didn’t want to add to any strain he might be experiencing.
“Urgg and Monqilcolnen know each other?” Camden asked.
“Yes.”
Urgg smacked a young ensign’s shoulder, and the blonde drakcol went sprawling to the mat.
Camden chuckled. “He doesn’t know his own strength.”
“They,” I corrected. “Urgg is non-gendered.” Barbarus were a mono-sex species, but they identified under three genders: male, female, and non-gendered.
“Oh, thanks for letting me know,” Camden said. “They don’t know their own strength. Urgg sent me crashing into a wall last night.”
That happened frequently. The only person Urgg was careful with was Seth.
They had accidentally hurt him in the past, and Prince Kalvoxrencol had gotten angry about the bruise left behind.
Now, Urgg was careful because Seth wouldn’t speak up for himself most of the time, though he was getting better about voicing his needs.
Monqilcolnen moved to the front of the training room, standing on one of the three grappling mats in the long room.
Blue and black targets lined the wall behind him—blaster targets.
Their glowing lights almost seemed to mock me with every little shift or wink in color.
I wasn’t going to pass, and I was going to have to attend this class non-stop, facing Monqilcolnen every single week.
“Let’s begin,” Monqilcolnen said. He and Urgg were assessing who met muster and who did not. The exams would be done in groups over the next few days, then staggered in the future to not cause any issues around duty shifts.
When Monqilcolnen motioned for me to join him, I swallowed, tail twitching. I’d hoped for Urgg.
“Lieutenant Wyn,” he said when I remained in my spot half-hidden behind Camden.
I offered him my throat. Thank the Crystal, he hadn’t called me Ensign Puke. That was a small mercy.
We faced off, and I took a calming breath.
This was something I could do. I had always excelled at hand-to-hand combat, even before I’d joined the academy and received formal training.
The small moon I’d grown up on hadn’t been the most pleasant place, and I’d had to defend myself more than once, though most of the situations had been of my own making.
I hadn’t always been so calm or rule-following as I was now.
I countered every move he made, dodging blows while keeping my eyes on his tail. Our tails were far stronger than they appeared. He punched, and I knocked his arm away, hitting him in the side. I’d pulled my hit, as the intention of this wasn’t to injure anyone.
He smiled, just slightly, and I paused. I’d never see him smile. Not once. And if I had, it had never been directed toward me nor had it made much of an impression. Not like right now. With him right in front of me. The sight of the little quirk made my soul tumble over itself.
His tail latched around my ankle and threw me to the ground. My breath whooshed out from the hard hit, and needles pricked my lungs. It had been entirely my fault for getting distracted by a mere smile.
Monqilcolnen moved on top of me, pinning me in place, and I froze, my soul pounding so loudly it drowned out all the sounds of feet dragging on the mats or Urgg’s boisterous laughter or the thump of someone smacking into the floor.
No, all I heard was my own soul racing. Monqilcolnen’s solid weight pressed into me, and the strands of his hair that had escaped his bun brushed my cheek, tickling me in a distracting manner.
I stared into his gold eyes, and my thoughts drifted away.
The moment seemed to stretch on forever, and I had no desire to move, nor did Monqilcolnen.
His eyes roved my face, and his breath turned as harsh as mine, all while his weight settled more fully on me.
He was so much larger than me, but I wasn’t concerned in the slightest. Rather it felt nice, grounding, to have him press into me. Almost as if I was perfectly safe.
What exactly was happening?
With a low grunt, I forced myself to move. A shove and a twist later, I was free. I maneuvered behind Monqilcolnen to put him in a choke hold. He patted my arm, not trying to get free, and I swallowed at the feel of his warm scales on mine. I released him instantly, scuttling away.
His face reverted to the peaceful expression I was used to seeing. “Excellent as usual, Lieutenant Wyn. You pass as expected.”
I offered him my throat, and he dismissed me with a wave, then called another person forward.
My tail coiled around my ankle and my wings fought to escape the confines of my shirt, but they couldn’t.
I had one harnessed, so it was impossible for them to slide out of the slits in my shirt.
With deep breaths, I attempted to calm my pounding soul.
I couldn’t say what had happened, but I didn’t care for it.
Nothing good could possibly come from whatever had just occurred on the mat, and it was much better to simply forget about it.
Camden sidled up to me. “You’re as good as everyone says.”
“At fighting? Yes. I’m not as gifted with blasters.”
“Could you teach me? I learned the basics back on Prince Dontilvynsan’s ship, but I want to be able to defend myself.” His aspect darkened, and his hands curled into tight fists, shaking.
My eyes roved his tight muscles. Unless he chose to tell me, I would never know what happened to him on Xome. However, the xoi weren’t known for being kind, and slavery was never free of pain, suffering, or trauma.
“I would be honored to teach you. Seth was one of the first people I taught, and he is decently talented.”
“I asked him to teach me,” Camden said, “but Seth’s not comfortable with me yet. And I think he’s peopled out after he takes care of the necessary stuff.”
Seth didn’t care for people as a whole. The individual person? Yes. People in groups? No. Too much time with others would tire him. Besides, he was busy with his new kit as well as his mate, without even discussing the responsibilities of being the leader of the humans.
“I can teach you,” I said.
“Thanks.”
I smiled but remained silent. My eyes shifted to Monqilcolnen again.
He was attractive. Of course he was attractive, with his long nose, full lips, and strong chin, all resembling the princes’ features, but he was uniquely lovely for the roughness of his aspect.
His tapered ears were pierced to the tip with gold studs, and a gold stud pieced his right nostril.
He wore no other jewelry, which wasn’t unusual for being on duty, but it was odd for someone of his station.
He was nobility, even if he wasn’t part of the royal family.
Our different stations were as obvious as the lengths of our names. I had only one letter; he had four.
Once everyone had been assessed in hand-to-hand combat, Monqilcolnen called me forward to the range on the back of the wall.
I, along with four others, raised my blaster.
We had ten shots. To pass we had to hit the three inner rings eight out of ten times.
I lined up as best as possible and fired.
My score would appear on Monqilcolnen’s screen.
He stood in front of me. “Four out of ten.”
My head ducked. Fail. I’d known it was coming, but it frustrated me. I went to a range twice a week to practice, and I wasn’t getting better at a normal speed. I was up from my usual of two out of ten, but it had taken years to get to four. I would never make it to a proficient state.
“I will see you in class,” he said, moving closer.
Swallowing, I swore I felt his breath on the sensitive tip of my ear. “You will.”
I returned to the back wall, and Urgg clapped my shoulder while Camden gave me a pitying smile.
“You’re getting better,” Urgg said.
“Not truly.”
“You are. Celebrate the small successes, Wyn.” Urgg nudged me. “Want to go drink?”
“It’s the morning, and I have duty.”
“Fine,” Urgg grunted. “Meet me for lunch?” They glanced at Camden. “Both of you?”
“Of course,” I replied, fighting a smile.
Urgg and their strays. They seemed to find people who needed them most and latched on, not giving them a choice in receiving their friendship. I should know; I was one of them.