Chapter 21
I just want to speak with him.
I barely paid Talvax any attention as she rightly chastised me for ignoring her ping. She paced in front of me as I stood with my hands at my sides. Her words were meaningless in the face of what had transpired on the planet’s surface.
Wyn had claimed me.
It hadn’t been simply interest or friendship.
He’d claimed me in front of another. I wasn’t so young or naive to believe he wished to be mates right this moment—he didn’t know me well enough—but I was hopeful that possibility existed.
I was already there, but Wyn… I truly hoped one day he would wish to be my mate.
He’d said we wouldn’t work. That was simply untrue. I knew of nothing more perfect than the feel of Wyn’s lips on mine. It had been magical. Not enough words existed to describe what I’d felt in that moment. The wholeness. The rightness. The most utter certain knowledge I belonged solely to him.
Wyn was my soul, and I refused to live even one more day without him beside me.
“Do you understand me, Commander?” Talvax snapped.
I blinked. I hadn’t listened to her enough to form an appropriate response, but her tone slightly shocked me. Talvax wasn’t one to get angry easily—she’d helped care for Kalvoxrencol when he was young, for the Crystal’s sake, and he’d been a notorious troublemaker.
Nonetheless, I replied, “I understand, Captain, and offer my apologies.” I gave her my throat, and Talvax relaxed, finally taking her seat.
She gestured to one of the stools in front of her desk and asked, “Now will you tell me why you and Lieutenant Wyn didn’t respond to my ping?”
I took a seat and answered, keeping my face in its usual mask, “It’s of a personal nature. I don’t feel comfortable divulging.”
Talvax snorted, her tail wiggling. “Personal? I believe I can guess what exactly you two were so engaged in.”
I chuckled; I couldn’t help it. I was so happy.
Her eyebrows lifted. “I’m correct, aren’t I?”
“If you’re hinting Wyn and I might have been engaged in a romantic entanglement, then you’re not wrong.”
“I knew it. Of course, Urgg will claim they knew first, but I have had some inkling of your interest in him since our first voyage to Earth.”
My desire for Wyn came from much earlier than a mere three cycles ago. My thoughts raced to the stylus sitting in a place of honor in my office. I’d carried him with me for many cycles.
“What is this relationship?” she asked.
“I’m unsure. We have not discussed it yet. I know what I wish, but that doesn’t mean Wyn reciprocates it.”
She tilted her head to the side, just slightly, in concession. “How are we to handle it? You’re the commander of the Admiral Ven and his superior officer.”
Regulation didn’t allow anyone to court those within their chain of command due to the power imbalance they had over them. As a captain or commander of a vessel, you didn’t court anyone within your ship unless they were a civilian, and even then, some would frown upon it.
My care for Wyn was far too deep to allow a few raised eyebrows or regulations deter me—if I’d been afraid of such things, I never would’ve entered the navy in the first place.
No. I strove to prove I was the best commander in existence.
I had to. I had to show everyone I was worthy of being here, and that I’d made the right choice all those cycles ago.
If I had to do the same thing with Wyn, I would.
I would prove I was worthy of him, every day.
And I refused to allow anyone to tell me I wasn’t.
However, Talvax was correct; this situation needed to be handled carefully.
Wyn didn’t deserve to be whispered about or shamed for choosing me if I was indeed his choice.
Normally, someone of my family and rank would never be whispered about, but that was all people did about me: whisper, wonder, ask why the purest spiritual soul was in space instead of with the Ranks.
I needed to protect Wyn from that as much as I could.
“I believe I must turn over all matters regarding Wyn to another, so I make no decisions about him. If he is brought up on misconduct issues, then it should be handled by you and whatever officer you assign to be Wyn’s superior, same with anything in regards to his assignments.”
“That’s reasonable,” Talvax said. “And I concur. I will assign Qinlin to oversee him.”
She wouldn’t have been the person I chose, but then again, perhaps that was for the best. As the senior seeker on board, it made sense she’d be charged with overseeing Wyn’s duties or any issues that arose regarding him.
I offered Talvax my throat, and she smiled.
Standing, she placed a hand on my shoulder. “I am very pleased for you, Monqilcolnen.”
“Thank you.”
“But have a care. He’s younger than you by a considerable amount.”
“I am aware.”
“He’s also not of your station.”
“Neither am I of his. He’s following the calling associated with his soul, while I rebuked mine.”
She frowned.
“Neither is the empress,” I added quickly to hide anything she might read in my previous words. Talvax grinned. She and Aunt Vyn were old friends from childhood. They’d grown up on the same dilapidated moon.
“Indeed,” she replied, “and yet, you don’t know of her struggles because she has hidden them from you, her sons, and even Kontolmakqilnen.
Vyn doesn’t regret her choice, but it wasn’t an easy one, either.
Do not take Wyn’s acceptance of you, should he grant it, as something cheap.
He will spend his life justifying to everyone around him why he deserves you, while you will merely be seen as a generous and loving soul. ”
I wasn’t sure if that was strictly true, however, I said, “I would never take anything Wyn gives me as cheap. He is the best thing to ever happen to me.”
She didn’t reply, but rather gave me a pointed look before returning to her seat. “Let’s get on with discussing today’s issues. I would like to spend time with Urgg tonight, and I imagine you wish to see Wyn.”
I grabbed my screen as fast as possible because she was undoubtedly right.
The day couldn’t pass fast enough, but duties kept getting in the way.
It was one thing after another. I kept trying to push things off, but supervisors were reaching out to me about tardy notices or disciplinary actions.
The head of security had to update me, in person, about an incident with a vvekian and a barbarus—some cultural differences that had resulted in the vvekian’s veil being quite accidentally pulled off and leading to them being injured from the light.
Just as I finished resolving the last complaint, which had to be addressed today, I stood, glancing at Cincin to confirm she was still asleep on her tree in my office. I was about to go to my quarters when NAID said, “Captain Dontilvynsan would like to speak with you.”
I groaned. Normally, I was more than happy to speak to my cousin, but at the moment, I wanted to get ready to see Wyn. However, I sat back down and accepted Dontilvynsan’s link on my screen. When his face appeared, I greeted him. “Captain.”
“Monqilcolnen,” he said, his deep voice even. Dontilvynsan had been called “Captain” for far longer than he’d been in the Planetary Navy, let alone a captain. Hallonnixmin had given him the endearment for how he liked to boss us around as well as to protect everyone.
“What do you need?” I asked, trying to speed this along.
Dontilvynsan cocked an eyebrow, and I refused to quake under his silent rebuke.
My cousin was the largest of all of us, in height and bulk, with deep black scales, rich purple hair, and bright green eyes that matched all of his brothers except Kalvoxrencol.
For all his intimidating size, as well as his perceptive inner fire of reading minds, he was rather soft and kind.
Between him and his mate, I would rather face Dontilvynsan over Vince, even though the human was puny.
“Are you in a rush?” he inquired, crossing his arms.
“Why would you think that?”
He didn’t bother to respond and continued to stare at me.
The silence ticked in my brain, winding me tighter and tighter the longer it went. “Captain, what do you want?”
“You could answer my question. You seem in a great hurry. Have I interrupted something?”
“Yes,” I forced out, trying and failing to keep my expression calm.
“I pinged to speak with you. I didn’t mean to bother you.”
Before I could respond, a loud snort sounded, and I closed my eyes. Oh no. Suddenly, a tiny human with pale skin, black hair, eyes so dark they nearly matched his hair, and sharp cheekbones sat in Dontilvynsan’s lap. My cousin curled his arms around Vince’s waist while the human glared at me.
“You bother him, Donny?” Vince snapped, his eyes narrowed. “Unlikely.”
Vince wasn’t the calmest person I’d ever met, to put it lightly, but he was viciously protective of Dontilvynsan and kind to him, so that endeared him to me, even when I found his personality grating.
“Vince,” I greeted.
“So what bug climbed up your ass?” he demanded. “And why are you being rude to Don?”
Even without NAID’s translation, I knew “ass” meant butt. Vince liked to swear. A lot. I replied, “Nothing is wrong.”
“That cannot be true,” Dontilvynsan said, his chin hooked over his mate’s slim shoulder.
The sight of the two of them twisted my gut.
Wyn was larger than Vince, but he had the same delicate appearance, and Dontilvynsan and I were nearly the same size.
Nine cycles separated them—a greater than usual distance, much like Wyn and I.
I wanted what the two of them had, but with my Wyn.
“Wyn kissed me,” I said in a rush.
Vince broke into laughter. “Finally.”
I blinked. How did he even know of Wyn?
“Haven’t the two of you been dancing around this since Kal, that fucker, kidnapped Seth?” Vince asked. His hatred of Kalvoxrencol knew no bounds.
“Little Warrior,” Dontilvynsan whispered, then he looked at me. “But Vince is correct.”