Chapter 28
twenty-eight
. . .
Reese
I’d spent the night at my parents’ house instead of going to the rental house. I’d cried hard to my sister, thankful she was home from her interview in the city.
I’d filled her in on our fight, and she’d grilled me about why I hadn’t told him I was meeting with Carl. I couldn’t tell her the reason either. Because Finn deserved to be told the news that I was pregnant first, whether we were together or not.
But not yet.
I wanted him to go have this experience and work on this movie without worrying about me. Which I knew he would do the minute he found out I was pregnant.
But the things he’d said to me had been so hurtful. Liv had insisted that he was just lashing out because he thought I didn’t want him anymore.
How could he think that?
She’d even come back in when she’d heard my muffled cries through the walls, and she’d climbed into bed with me.
His text made me feel a little better, but I hated the way things ended. He’d apologized, insisting he would be back and that he wanted me and only me, and I was going to hold on to that.
Maybe right now, space was what we both needed.
I had a lot on my mind. I was going to be a mama.
It was something I’d always wanted, but this wasn’t how I saw it happening.
I had a new business that required a lot of time and energy, and I was moving some of my things into Georgia and Maddox’s rental house today.
My parents were offended that I wasn’t staying with them, but Liv had quickly jumped on board and said she’d be over there often, too, and that it was important for adults to have their own place.
I made my way into the kitchen and poured myself a cup of water when I was dying for coffee. But now that I knew that I was pregnant, I needed to find out what things I could and couldn’t have. I had a little human growing inside me to care for now.
A lump formed in my throat because I was overcome with how happy I was carrying a baby. A baby that was part me and part Chewy.
In my wildest dreams, I’d never allowed myself to even think about that as a possibility up until a few weeks ago. But even then, I was afraid to think about it. To hope for it.
“No coffee?” my mom asked as she walked in with a stack of clean dish towels from the laundry room.
“Nope. I’m trying to cut out the caffeine because I’ve just been drinking it too often.”
She raised a brow. “I thought you said you can’t function without a cup first thing in the morning?”
“Yeah, well, that was before I started this health kick.”
“Did someone say health kick? Mom says I need to eat healthier,” my father said as he walked in and made his way over to the coffeepot.
I envied him. But until I did my research, I’d abstain.
“I said that you can’t be eating all that candy every night.” My mom chuckled and swatted him with a towel.
They were so cute. Ridiculously in love. They couldn’t stand to be away from one another for long, and I’d always admired their relationship.
The family they’d created together.
“You’re right.” My father wrapped his arms around her from behind. “I’ve got all the sweetness I need right here.”
Swoon.
“Oh, man.” Liv made a gagging, vomiting sound and shook her head as she walked through the kitchen. “It’s too early for all that. Plus, as your offspring, we don’t want to see that. It’s too much. Get into a fight or something. Eat some pistachios, Dad. The way you chew them always annoys Mom.”
I fell forward with a laugh and shook my head. “Leave them alone. They’re sweet together.”
“If a man told me I was all the sweetness he needed, I would junk-punch him. I don’t need to be anyone’s sweetness. Sweeten your own life, dude. Not you, Dad, but if another man said it to me, I’d be disgusted.”
My dad rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t worry about anyone saying that to you.”
My mom and I both chuckled, and Liv rolled her eyes.
I glanced down at my phone to see a text.
Chewy
I’m heading to Tokyo. Was scrolling through my phone and found this photo of the first time we flew on a plane together. Remember the summer our families went to Maui? I miss you already, Miney.
A picture of me and Finn on an airplane, when we were ten years old, came through. He was wearing a Hawaiian shirt with a baseball cap and a big grin. I had on a white summer dress, two braids in my hair, and I was rocking quite the gap between my front teeth.
“What are you looking at?” My dad took the seat beside me and glanced down at the phone.
I handed it over, and my mom and sister both took turns looking.
“That was such a fun trip. Didn’t Cage get stung by a jellyfish?” my father asked.
“Oh, yes, he did. And he did not take it well. He had an epic meltdown,” Olivia said over her laughter.
“Yes. Finn was chasing him around, telling him he needed to pee on his foot,” my mother said with a big smile on her face. “So, he’s off to Tokyo. What happens after that with you two?”
“Inquiring minds want to know,” my sister said, waggling her brows.
“We’re taking it one day at a time. I’m going to move my clothes over to the rental house today and get settled. Georgie said it’s fully equipped. They just use it now for family and friends that are visiting, but they agreed to let me rent it for as long as I need it.”
“It’s silly to pay for a place when you can live here for free.” Dad sipped his coffee.
I wasn’t going to go down this road again.
“I love you guys, but I’m twenty-nine years old, and I need my own place. Plus, they gave me the same deal they gave Brinkley, which is a dollar a month, and I pay the utilities.” I shook my head and laughed.
There wasn’t much else to say.
I’m also having a baby that’ll be here in less than nine months.
I had no idea how far along I was, so I definitely needed to go see someone and start planning for the future.
“Well, I’ll grab my truck and help you move your things over,” my father said as he pushed to stand and leaned over to kiss my cheek.
“Moving is so not my thing.” Olivia shivered dramatically. “I’ve got to prep for an interview, anyway.”
“I hardly have that much to move over. I didn’t bring a ton to Finn’s house.”
My chest squeezed at the mention of his name. It was the first day in a while that I didn’t wake up to his handsome face. To his smile. To taking a ride down to the water right after we got up and moving.
“You’re leaving Millie over there?” my mom asked.
She’d been unusually quiet since I’d come home last night, which meant she was stewing, trying not to fire off rapid questions and have me shut her down.
Or maybe Alana had told her Finn and I were taking a break.
I wasn’t offering anything up because I wasn’t totally sure what would happen over the next few weeks.
“Yep. I’ll go ride her every day before work. I’m going to head over there now and take her out. I’ll meet you there in an hour?” I asked my father.
“I’ll be there, sweetheart.”
I grabbed my keys and my coat and made my way out to my car. I drove around the corner and pulled over, letting the tears fall again.
I cried for all that was unknown about my future.
I cried because I missed Finn.
I cried because I’d made a real mess of everything.
I cried because it crushed me that he thought I’d go back to Carl.
I cried because I was having a baby with the man I loved, and I didn’t know how to tell him.
And then I reached into my purse and pulled out some tissue and cleaned myself up.
You’ve got this.
One week had passed, and it felt like an eternity. But every single day, I received a text message the minute I opened my eyes, and they continued to come in throughout the day.
Every single day, there was a photo of me and Finn at different stages of our lives.
Together.
Always together.
I hearted each of the texts as they came in, but I hadn’t responded.
I wanted to give him his time to figure out what he wanted.
I wasn’t going to tell him how much I missed him right now.
How I cried myself to sleep every night.
How my body ached for him. How I missed his touch.
His laugh. His smile. Hell, I missed the way he smelled.
How twisted was that?
I sat at my desk and scrolled through all the photos and the texts that had come through this week.
Monday
Chewy
I miss your face.
Chewy
I dreamed about you last night. About your body and the little sounds you make when you’re pressed against me, sleeping.
A photo came through of us on the first day of kindergarten.
We were holding hands, and my head was tipped back in laughter, and he was just smiling at me.
It was one of my favorite pictures of us.
I printed it on my little phone printer and set it on my nightstand with the photo that he’d sent of us on the airplane.
Chewy
The food is good here, but it’s a little spicy. I miss taking the horses out with you. I think of you every night before the sun sets. It’s our time. Always has been, always will be.
Chewy
It doesn’t matter where I am. I think of you nonstop.
Chewy
I got hit on tonight, and I let her know I was practically married. Because, in a sense, I am. You have my heart, and you always will.
He sent a selfie of him holding up his phone with the vibrant city behind him and his handsome face smiling at me. I printed it and slept with it clutched to my chest.
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Monday evening, there’d been a knock on my door and an enormous vase filled with yellow daffodils and yellow roses was handed to me.
The card read:
There are no citrine flowers, so this is the best I can do.
There are 29 daffodils and 29 roses (pending Janine at Cottonwood Blooms counted correctly).
One of each flower for every year that I’ve been lucky enough to call you my best friend.
You are that and so much more. I will love you forever, Miney.
Xo, Chewy
Tuesday
Chewy