17. Zurmani
Two Weeks Later
"How's it going over there, girl? I can't believe you popped out with a man and a baby in a matter of months. You having a two-month-old baby is tripping me out," Jamaica comments.
"Girl, I'm still fighting the urge to pinch myself from these changes in my life. Things are going well, though. I'm working on wrapping up some things with work, and then I'll go on maternity leave for eight weeks. What's been going on with you?"
"Uh, that's actually why I'm calling. I need to apologize because my actions since you've been with Jawaan have been uncalled for. The truth is, I've been struggling with the events in my life, and bitterness has prevented me from being your best friend."
My hands pause from fastening Jalil's diaper when Jamaica's voice lowers and becomes shaky. I honestly see Jamaica's opposition about Jawaan as her way of making sure another man didn't cause me the pain Aldis did. I also have been so wrapped up in Jawaan and Jalil that I haven't been keeping up with Jamaica or Evie like normal. I didn't want to become one of those women who started dating and pushed everyone to the side. Yet, Jawaan and I have been balancing a lot of different factors than most relationships, so there has only been time for us to focus on each other. I feel terrible that I sprung Jawaan and Jalil on my parents, brother, and friends, but things moved faster than I had time to prepare.
"What's been going on? I apologize for my distance. Life has been tossing me to and fro, but it doesn't excuse my neglect."
"I've been sneaking and messing around with a man who has been filling my head with so much confusion until I could be a walking billboard of warning signs. He wined me, dined me, fucked me but has never committed to me. I met him on one of those dating sites and fell into his web of deceit. I found it difficult to believe that you could meet a stranger, and it go beyond the toxicity Jawaan initially was coming with."
A creak in the floor causes me to see Jawaan entering the room with his sights on Jalil. A lazy smile collides with the warmth flowing through my body upon seeing Jawaan winking at me and securing Jalil's diaper before picking him up and leaving the room without a word.
My man is so damn fine. Whew. God, I didn't see Jawaan coming but thanks for seeing fit to add to my life with his presence.
"Girl, I wasn't prepared for Jawaan's toxic ass either, but I will say that his public persona and private actions are vastly different. He's the most attentive and loving man I have ever been with."
"Trust me, it's something to savor because these niggas ain't shit. My lover had me sucking his toes just to get him to rub my back. Now, that nasty shit is toxic, and I can't believe I lost myself trying to secure a relationship. I blame my wack-ass daddy for not instilling real love into me. Damn."
"Hold up, you were doing what?" A deep frown twists my lips, and my nose scrunches like the smell of chitterlings is suddenly permeating the air.
"The worst part is that ain't the worst thing the nigga had me doing. I ate so many groceries from that nigga that I should be able to maintain my size the rest of the year, although I enjoyed pegging that ass. The power I got from watching him moan from me pushing big black in and out of him was whew... magical." Jamaica laughs.
"Ewe. Nope. I'll pass on all that. Show me a man who enjoys pegging, and I'll show you who prefers dick no matter who it's attached to."
"Period. I will say it's addic?—"
"Wait, you're still messing with this man after all that? Say it ain't so," I cut Jamaica off, and my eyes stretch while my right hand rests on my chest.
"Mhm. Now you understand my jealousy because while you're being dicked down and on your way to happily ever after, I'm settling for pegging from a man who refuses to admit he's not into women."
"Wow." I'm at a loss for words to communicate, leaving me nearly speechless.
"I know. Sorry for every negative reaction to the great things happening in your life. You deserve to receive all of it, and I will no longer put my bullshit on you. You have always been a supportive friend, so the least I can do is reciprocate what you've always given. Now, how is my nephew?"
Ten Minutes Later
"What was that for?" Jawaan asks when I kiss him before sitting next to him and Jalil, who is resting comfortably on Jawaan's chest.
"I just realized that I love you and am where I'm supposed to be. I never saw myself overcoming the sting of a horrible relationship that ended after a miscarriage, but then God sent you. Volunteering in an area where I never saw myself being a direct participant in had to be in God's plan for my life. It's crazy that I didn't realize the moment my pain had been healed because this little one had gotten all of my attention. Do you know I was trying to avoid going to the hospital because I was growing too attached? It hurt to know he wouldn't be going home with me once he got better," I confess, running my fingers through Jalil's curls.
"My attachment is why I did keep going. I couldn't see myself missing a minute of being in his presence. I'm grateful that God chose us to be his parents. Y'all have become my reason not to hide behind a mask. Everyone sees me as this jokester who can smile my way through everything. Yet the truth is, it's what I did to prevent showing the tears, the fears, and the devastation I feel behind my closed doors."
Jawaan's calm timbre while speaking his truth has my breath hitching because I had only recently concluded his self-coping methods. My man is someone who doesn't reveal his burdens to the world, so most will overlook his scars. Yet, I'm grateful that God has allowed me to be the woman Jawaan can be soft, raw, and open with. It's a privilege I will never understand or take lightly or for granted.
"When you are weak, I will be strong," I confidently reassure him.
"You already are, and it's one of the reasons I love you."
"I did want to ask you a question, though."
My heart rate accelerates when Jawaan's golden orbs peer into me while his hand caresses Jalil's back without breaking his stride.
"What's up?"
"How did you take paternity leave before me? Don't you have things to get straight at work?"
A low chuckle escapes Jawaan's mouth, causing my pussy to thump, and I fight the urge not to moan or close my eyes from the sexy sound.
"I'm a boss, which means I don't need anyone to approve my time off. I also have people in place to continue getting work done."
Oh shit! What does Jawaan do for work and how the hell didn't I know before now?
"A boss," I repeat with my brows hiking, unable to ask the question echoing in my mind.
"It's crazy that you've ridden my dick before learning my profession... do better, Tigress." Jawaan smirks.
"I know. I feel so bad." Disconnecting our eyes, I hang and shake my head.
The worst part is that it really doesn't matter to me what Jawaan does, but I will keep that to myself.
"I'm the proud owner of Young's Custom Cyber. The great thing about what I do is I can perform my tasks from anywhere in the world. Cybersecurity is something I appreciate having the knowledge of because sometimes people can get beside themselves in this virtual world we live in."
"Hold on, I've seen your logo on some things at work. Do you handle organizations through the state?"
"I handle any organization with the ability to pay my rates. I would be a fool to turn down money when people depend on me to take care of their households. Until now, I didn't have mouths to feed like my employees, but everybody still has to eat, so we handle whatever comes in unless our plate is full."
"How have you been managing work with us and Jalil?"
Jawaan's smirk has my lips stretching into a bright smile before he responds to the question.
"Proper delegation and open communication. Speaking of which, when are you done with work?"
"Today."
"Good. I want us to take a trip. It'll be our babymoon and a chance for the three of us to bond without interruptions from the outside world."
"W—
Ding. Dong.
Woof. Woof.
The sound of the doorbell causes Cleo to bark while running toward the front door, instantly cutting off what I was about to say. Cleo has been slightly more friendly toward me since I have been staying here. Yet, she has been completely receptive to Jalil and has even been lying near his bassinet every night. It's cute to see Cleo protecting Jalil because I was nervous about how her moody butt would react to him.
"This is why I want us to go away somewhere. We need family time," Jawaan says, pouting while standing with Jalil heading to the door. "Cleo, home."
Laughter bubbles to the surface when I enter the foyer and see Cleo sit on her back legs before her head shifts to me and then the door. I have never seen a dog with so much personality like Cleo.
"Sorry to drop in like this, but we brought food and some things for our grandson," Mom explains, entering the house with Dad on her heels.
"It's not a problem, Mrs. Coates. Come on in. What's in the bags?" Jawaan asks.
What happened to you pouting about our unannounced visitors?
Jawaan's face transforms into a happy countenance while his gaze is on the bags in Dad's hands.
"I made some enchiladas, cheesy Mexican rice, guacamole, and salsa. I figured we could share a meal while we visit with this handsome cutie," Mom says, leaning in to kiss Jalil's head.
"Bet. Let me go put on a shirt, and I'll be right back. I'll get Little Man ready, too," Jawaan voices.
Like his dad, Jalil isn't company-ready since he's only wearing a diaper and some booties on his little feet. Jawaan has continued skin-to-skin care with him every day since he's been home with us. Jawaan is wearing joggers and slides but no shirt, although Mom doesn't seem to pay attention to his bare chest one way or another since her focus is on the baby.
"Hey, you two. Come on, we'll get everything set up in the dining room while Jawaan gets him and Jalil situated," I urge, smiling.
"Hey, Nae. How are you?" Dad asks, entering my space to kiss my cheek before he and Mom follow me.
"I'm perfect. Adjusting to my new normal, but I'm terrific. Jawaan makes parenting easy."
"He seems to be a natural at being a father," Mom says.
"I know. Jalil has been spending most of the time with Jawaan while I wrapped up last-minute things before taking my maternity leave."
"Your father was the same way when I had you and Zion. Some days, I slept so well that I forgot I even had a baby. Kerry would somehow get to you or your brother within minutes of hearing your little cries. Most would say that women are hard-wired to hear their children crying, but in our case, it was Kerry. I slept like a bear," Mom admits, laughing.
"Which hasn't changed even after all these years," Dad interjects.
"Then I am my mother's daughter because a few times that has been me. Jalil's little cries haven't become common for me yet."
"Wait until he realizes that all his needs are tied to the funny-looking people constantly cooing and drooling over him," Dad says, smirking.
Or when he decides that his parents don't need to have sex.
"If I can get him to not int?—"
"Jawaan," I say, cutting him off before he can complete the statement that I'm positive mimics the one in my mind.
Jawaan enters the room appropriately covered, holding Jalil, who is now wearing a light blue sleeper.
"I'm holding him first, Michaela," Dad insists, and his eyes light up while twinkling at seeing Jalil squirming in Jawaan's arms.
"What happened to the age-old rule... ladies first?" Mom asks.
"It was upheld the first day we met our grandson. All bets are off now." Dad leaves the room with Mom's crestfallen face, inciting my giggles that I quickly try to cover with my hand when Mom shifts in my direction.
"Is something funny, Zurmani Coates?" Mom's right hand rests on her waist, and her eyes are devoid of humor.
"No, ma'am. I was?—"
"Cruising for some act right. Don't worry, Mrs. Coates, I'll get her together for you," Jawaan interjects with a sneaky, sensual promise shining in his orbs.
"See, this is why I like you already. They don't treat me right, and I need an ally. Now, why don't you help me out bef?—"
"All right. Grandpa is ready for some loving from his grandson." Dad reenters the room, cutting Mom off, and my uncontainable laughter surfaces when Mom's frown appears.
Seeing Mom and Dad's excitement over becoming grandparents in the most unorthodox way either could have imagined has my chest pinching and jumping. While I didn't know how they would react to the news, which made me do it in the presence of Jawaan's family, I'm happy that neither Mom nor Dad rejected my baby. For two weeks, Jawaan's house has been a steady stream of family, which is why he's talking about a getaway for the three of us.
"See why a babymoon is necessary? Our family is gonna have us vying for time with our son, and I ain't feeling sharing him yet," Jawaan says, wrapping his arm around me while we watch Dad talk gibberish to Jalil with Mom standing guard.
"Mhm. Where are we going?"
"You worry about packing for you and Little Man, and I'll take care of everything else."