Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Cassidy
“ O h, my goodness, do you know what time it is?!” Lynn whisper-yells into the phone.
“I don’t give a rat’s ass what time it is! You set me up with a lunatic!” I whisper-yell back.
“Why are you whispering? Is he still there?”
“No! I’m whispering because you are. Is Chase asleep?” I’m sitting in my armchair, staring at the couch where, just a few minutes ago, I was making out with Mr. Country Charm.
“Yeah, we were watching a movie and he passed out. Hold on, let me move so I don’t have to whisper.” I can hear her rustling around on the other end of the line and then some mumbling. She must have woken Chase up when she was moving around. I feel bad for being the reason he’s waking up, but this phone call couldn’t wait.
“Okay.” Her voice fills the phone at a more standard volume but is still softened.
“Okay?! No, not okay! That was a total fucking mess!” I can feel my face heating as I blush. It could be because I’m embarrassed, or turned on, or frustrated. All I know for sure is my face is becoming more red than pink now.
“Really? When you guys left the bar, I saw you two holding hands, so it looked like it was going pretty well. It was all smiles after you texted me that I was a cow, and you were selling me to his ugly brother. And I got a look at that man Cass, ugly isn’t in those genes.” The realization hits me.
“You were at the bar?!”
“Of course, I was, you idiot. What if he was a serial killer!”
“I asked him if he was, and he said no!”
“Serial killers don’t advertise that they kill people for fun, you loon.” I’m stunned at her words. They practically echo Hunter’s.
“Well, he wasn’t a killer. He was a prude.” I feel bad for even saying it because the man did kiss, fondle, and get me off on our first date. First blind date because Lynn pranked me. He mooed in my ear!
“A prude? Really? Damn, I imagine a man like that knew his way around a bedroom. Guess I was wrong,” she says disappointedly.
“You’ve thought about him like that?” Jealousy surges through me. Irrational? Yes, but she’s married!
“Sweetheart, did you get a good look at that man? He’s built like a Viking! I just imagined he burned a lot of his calories in the bedroom.”
Of course, I got a good look at him, and I thought the same thing, but apparently, he didn’t feel like burning off the burgers we had just eaten. I look back over to the couch and let out a heavy sigh.
“Yeah, I saw him. He’s handsome, I’ll give him that. He just didn’t feel like having a night of fun with old Sassidy. Way to kick off my thirtieth year on this earth, as a dried-up, old has-been. I remember being twenty-nine when guys would kill for a night of no-drama, no-strings, good sex with me. Now, it’s not so easy. Avoid this birthday at all costs Lynn, who knows what will happen to your and Chase’s sex life.” I throw a dramatic arm over my forehead, even though she can’t see. It feels good being a bit dramatic right now. I’m wallowing in dramatic self-pity. Maybe I seem a bit spoiled for not getting my way, but I really put myself out there!
“Chase will probably still be trying to get it in when we’re in a nursing home. I’m not too worried,” she says lightly. I just roll my eyes. “Did you offer him a night of no-drama, no-strings… uhm, fun?” I can tell Lynn is blushing, and it brings a smile to my face.
“Yeah, I most definitely did.”
“Well, shit Cass, maybe he wasn’t looking for a one-night stand!?!” she barks at me.
“What else would I offer a country boy who lives over an hour away? I have not, and do not, want a boyfriend, Lynn. It’s okay, I like my life the way it is. I don’t need you trying to set me up with long-term guys. Things will just end up like they did tonight.”
I stand and start cleaning up the mess from the food Hunter and I ate. I plan on sleeping in late tomorrow, so I don’t want to have to clean it up in the morning, or afternoon, depending on when I wake up.
“Okay, Okay. Jeez. Sorry. Was the moo part funny?” I can hear how excited she is. That’s Lynn, excited over planning a prank. I find it more humorous that it ended up being cute rather than embarrassing.
“Yes, I was about to knock his block off. He kept rambling on and on without making any sense to me. If he wasn’t so hot, I probably would have smacked him.” I roll my eyes; the man is just so effin’ hot.
After cleaning up my mess I turn out my living room light and blindly make my way to my bedroom. I can hear Lynn giggling on the line.
“Well, I’m glad it was funny. I can’t wait to tell Georgie and Mary! You looked pissed, and then you looked like you wanted to jump him.” She’s too proud. I’m regretting calling her suddenly.
“Remember Lynn, your birthday is only a few short months away. I’ll remember you took over my prank this year.”
I hear silence. No giggling or shuffling around.
“Remember what I’m capable of,” I play-threaten.
“The bunny…” she whispers, and I grin.
Dropping myself into my bed, I throw an arm behind my head.
“Just kidding, babe. I’d never do that to you again. Moos or not,” I tell her sweetly. “I love you too damn much.”
“I love you too. Sorry he didn’t get your rocks off, and that you didn’t like him more.” I can tell that she’s a little sad with the outcome, but that’s Lynn. My eternal good girl.
I could tell her that he did technically get my rocks off, we just didn’t seal the deal. I also could tell her that I liked him a lot. Neither of those things would be productive though; if anything, she would take more victory in it.
I, Cassidy Walker, just happen to be a sore loser.
“It’s okay. Go get that husband of yours and get some sleep.”
“Will do. Love you, girl,” she closes.
“Love you moo.”
I undo my bra and pull the straps out and off so I can get more comfortable. Climbing further up my bed I lie in the middle, just how I like. I wish Hunter would have stayed, we seemed so physically compatible. It’s not often you meet someone and just click with them. I had that with this guy. He didn’t get annoyed by my blabbering. He didn’t think the girls and my pranks were dumb. His kisses weren’t that initial awkward kiss, like he’s trying to be too forceful or lacking in confidence.
The way he was massaging my feet. The way his fingers played with the skin of my breast. The man has skills, and I wanted more of them. I can imagine that he is a generous lover.
I reach over to my nightstand and pull out a large book. Except it’s not really a book. It’s a keepsake box, which holds a close friend of mine. My dear Wanda. She and I have great plans tonight. Plans that don’t physically involve a sexy cowboy, but we can sure think about one together. I recall the skills Hunter had displayed tonight and imagine how the rest of the night would have gone had we not stopped.
Wanda keeps me company for fifteen minutes before my body pulls me toward a deep and much-needed sleep.
Damn you, Country Charm.
I wake up the next morning, or at least I thought it was morning, to a handful of texts. After looking at my phone, I confirm it is technically the afternoon since it’s after twelve.
Lynn: I’m sorry, but not sorry. Love you.
Interesting .
Poor Lynn, she probably feels a handful of guilt over last night.
Unknown: Good morning beautiful. I woke up thinking of you.
Unknown: Image Attached.
I drop my phone and my hand covers my mouth. The image attached is a faceless one, but I have a feeling I know who it is. It shows a body under a plain white sheet, clean might I add, washboard abs, half of a perfectly sculpted pec, and a healthy and even slightly detailed tent. I shamelessly zoom into the picture and am able to see a thick outline and a plump head.
Those two texts were sent at five-thirty. Who wakes up at five-thirty on a Sunday?! With a boner, no less. If I woke up at an hour like that it would be because my fire alarm was going off and I needed to evacuate my building, or because one of the girls had an emergency. Needless to say, in either of those situations, I would not wake up in that kind of mood.
Another text came at about nine.
Unknown: So, in case you get pics like that regularly, and it might look like the abdomen of one of those piss pore excuses of a man they have in the city… It’s Hunter
Unknown: If this is not Cassidy Walker, I apologize. I am in the middle of a prank circle between this girl and her group of friends, so I may have been given your number as part of that.
I bark out a laugh. That would actually be quite hilarious. I’ll jot down the idea of giving a wrong number on purpose to one of the girls as a prank. Old boyfriend? Old boss? In-law? Oh, the possibilities are endless.
Me: I don’t know who you are! But my wife does not want pics of your package! If I ever find you, I'll kill you!
I start laughing all over again. There is probably a special place on this earth for people like me. Comedy Island? Is that a thing? I change the name on the phone from an unknown number to a name. My phone buzzes immediately. I roll over onto my stomach and perch myself up on my elbows.
Country Charm: I swear I do not know your wife! I am looking for a girl I’m interested in. I met her on a blind date set up by her friends and I didn’t get her number! My sincerest apologies. My mama would be smackin’ me upside the head right now.
Me: I should be smacking you upside the head!
I feel a small warmth grow inside me at the idea of getting my ass smacked in punishment for this little prank on Hunter. Is he the spanking type? I’m not heavy into it, but a good ass smack has merit.
Country Charm: Again, I apologize.
Hmmm, I can see what type of man Hunter is.
Me: You can start apologizing by smacking my ass.
Country Charm: I’m sorry?
Me: Instead of me smacking you upside the head. How about I come by and lay across that impressive erection and you smack my ass?
I see three dots appear and disappear. To be safe, I should probably cut it out, or he might block me.
Me: I’m joking Hunter, it’s Cassidy.
Country Charm: How can I know for sure? I have no doubt that the evil side of Cassidy is completely capable of this, but how can I know?
Me: Because it’s me.
Country Charm: Why didn’t you answer sooner?
Me: Normal people like sleep on Sundays.
Country Charm: That sounds like something Cassidy would say, but I’m still not convinced. Pic?
I mull it over. I stripped all of my clothes off last night during those few great rounds with Wanda and then tossed on a fresh spaghetti strap tank and panties to sleep in. Hell, there are probably worse pics of me out there and country boy doesn’t seem the hazing type. I arch my hips a little and make sure my hair isn’t a complete disaster. I snap a quick pic, look it over, and hit send.