Chapter 9
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The village feels like more and more like my home with each passing day, I think as I bandage a young man’s hand where he burned it on a heated sword handle in the smithy this morning. The realization hits me not as a thunderclap, but more like a rolling fog coming down from the hills.
My days are still spent training with the fae, and although the time with them is difficult, it isn't impossible, and I've noticed that my body feels even stronger.
I'm not so tired afterward, and, in the evenings, when Voss snarls that we can go, Jak is usually waiting and we go to the healer's rooms to spend a bit of time learning his art and helping people with their ailments.
As a result, many of the villagers have begun to get to know me. They say my name and speak to me. They nod at me and greet me in the street.
The side-eyes and the whispers that followed in my wake before have all but disappeared, and it seems as if they're finally accepting me, much to Jak, Morgan, and even Locke's clear delight.
Jak was right.
Or, perhaps I should say, Locke was right.
Working in the healer’s rooms really is starting to change the perception of me as an untrustworthy Dark Realmer to a woman who isn’t dangerous, and one who could be an asset here.
The later evenings after the healer's rooms are pleasantly spent in either Jak's or Morgan's beds, along with their skillful and very pleasurable hands. Sometimes with just one, other times with both. I fall asleep between them sated and safe every night.
I thought the Light Realm might be a false hope when I first came to Halsford, but I think that I can see myself settling here properly, making a life in this place, perhaps even with Jak and Morgan.
I don’t know about Locke. He still doesn't speak to me much. I always seem to see him out of the corner of my eye when I'm walking through the village, though, and he watches me often whenever we’re at home in the evenings.
He thinks I don’t notice.
I haven't spoken much to him either. I’m not sure what to say.
I'm still angry about what he did, but over my time here in the Light Realm, he's been different.
Although he still seems to be the leader of the group in some ways, he hasn't ordered anyone around, nor made any decisions for all of us, even if he disagrees with the others over something.
And, to my utter annoyance, I’ve begun to find myself looking for him. Wondering where he is when I haven't seen him in a while.
The mantra that I was saying to myself stopped working days ago.
These fae males have wormed their way into me somehow.
Whether it's this ritual, or just that I’m getting to know them as one of the freefolk, I’m not sure.
Perhaps it's just the camaraderie we've begun to share.
It mirrors that which I felt when we were in the Dark Realms journeying to Merediea, but now without the dark cloud of my status as a slave following me.
Being free agrees with me. I no longer feel the urge to look to anyone for orders.
I even help Morgan cook our meals along with the others without being asked.
We do things for each other. It feels as if we are a unit, dare I say the beginnings of a family.
It should terrify me, but it doesn't. It feels natural, like this was how it was always supposed to be with them.
It’s not perfect here, of course. There are still some in Halsford who don't like me. Tavish himself seems content to ignore me now. I don’t know if Dawn, his wife, ever told him that she sought my help, but his men in particular give me angry looks, and a wide berth.
Though, after the incident in the alley, I go nowhere near any of them alone. Even when I’ve gone to the Trading Post with one of the others, the men’s comments to me have ranged from righteous anger to sneering, whispered innuendos that I don’t quite hear, but unnerve me, nonetheless.
I thought I noticed two of them trailing after Jak and me one evening while we made our way to the healer’s rooms after my training, but I’m not certain they were actually following us, or just going home.
Perhaps I’m paranoid, but they make me feel uncomfortable. I’m very glad that Morgan and Locke have been teaching me better fighting techniques. I can use a knife with some finesse now, and my foot work is some of the best Locke has ever seen, I overheard him telling Morgan yesterday.
I’ve also tried countless times over the past few days to make something happen, to wield Fate as a weapon, but still haven't been able to do anything on purpose, so I can only assume that what happened in the alley, and with the egg were coincidences. I can’t rule out that I’m completely misremembering setting the goblin on fire, too.
After all, I was in a haze, and I don't quite recall any of that night properly.
For the moment, I’ve stopped attempting it. I don’t have time for fanciful imaginings.
My days are filled with exertion. My fae cohorts don’t give me much trouble, thankfully, but it’s clear that they neither like nor trust me.
They rarely speak to me directly. I hear them whispering and giving me looks of disdain, though, and Voss always refers to me as ‘slave’, which I hate.
I never give him the satisfaction of appearing bothered, but I’ll be glad when I no longer have to train with them.
I never thought I’d be impatient to go back to the Dark Realms, but the sooner I can help take down the Underhill’s enemies, the sooner they’ll leave me be and I can focus on being a healer.
When he’s not calling me names, Voss now locks me outside the ward when I'm not careful to stay close to at least one of the fae students.
I'm forced to wait until another fae passes by, or for Voss to deign to let me in. Last week, I stopped to get a stone out of my boot and was last. He left me outside the ward until they were finished for the day and took great delight in ensuring that I knew that I’m not as good as his kind.
In the Dark Realms, being stuck in the forest without protection would be a death sentence.
Gods only know what creatures would get me and I don’t feel much different about the Light.
In truth, I have no idea what monsters live out in the forests here.
Are there any Dark Realms beasts lurking in the dark trees ready to unfurl and grab me?
If there were, would the fae help me, or laugh and leave me to die?
I hear hard footsteps coming up behind me and I move to the side of the path, bracing in case any of the fae try to elbow me out of the way.
This has happened several times, and, although I’ve not been hurt, I’m afraid I will be and Fate will retaliate.
None of them bar Voss seems to know what I am and I aim to keep it that way, fearing that they’ll use it against me the way Ogdan and Sio used to, the way that Warrior would have. At least Voss hasn’t done that.
Three fae males run by, choosing not to look at me.
I chance a glance behind me and see two others a few paces back.
I ensure I never finish at the front, choosing to check my pace and keep to the middle so as not to invite jealous ire nor Voss’s complete attention.
But I think that, if I put in full effort, I would outpace most of them, now.
None of them seem particularly strong or possessed of great stamina like Morgan, Jak, and Locke, though perhaps it’s because these fae are young and untried.
I've gleaned that the rest of the group has been training in the Underhill for months and that their days in the Light Realm are the final phase for them before they can begin protecting the Underhill. They’ll be placed at various fae outposts in the Dark after that.
I still think it's odd that they don't seem to know very much about the Dark Realms, but it’s nothing to do with me.
I get to the end of the final run of the day and stop by the path that leads to Halsford just outside the ward as Voss sometimes orders us to do. The enforcer is nowhere to be seen. It’s just me and the three fae who passed me.
I keep a wary eye on them, standing apart as we wait for the rest to catch up.
I think about getting home, eating whatever hearty meal Morgan has prepared, going to the healer’s rooms with Jak, being taken to one of their beds later. A small smile plays on my lips as I anticipate a pleasant evening ahead.
Jak is going to show me how to make a different salve for bites and stings using springtime ingredients, and, afterward, I’ve been promised a long bath with him and Morgan. If they’re feeling particularly spiteful toward Locke, they’ll make him watch while they both fuck me.
Again.
They’ve done this three times now, and Locke, for whatever reason, is increasingly irate. I don’t really understand why. There are plenty of women, and likely fae females too, who would have him.
I frown at that thought. I don’t like the idea of him with another.
But he’s not mine.
Do I want him to be?
Confused and still ruminating on Locke, I watch idly as two of the others catch up. The fae form a small group and I watch as one of them ambles off into the trees, likely for a piss.
The others are speaking in low tones, glancing at me with disdain. I let out a small sigh, hoping Voss gets here soon and lets us go back to the village on time.
I press my arm against the slight bulge in my tunic on one side where a knife that Morgan gave me resides in a sheath. Just in case.
The one who went off returns, but he looks a bit disturbed. He goes to the others and starts gesturing to the wood, muttering something about a boy.
I look to where he’s pointing, drifting closer to hear what they’re saying, my heart beginning to thud in my chest.
Surely no one from the village would be outside the locked wards.
‘What is it?’ I ask.
One of them looks over his shoulder at me with a sneer.
'Yoriel says he just saw a boy from the village.'
My eyes snap to the trees.