Chapter 44
Forty-Four
The morning drills had been brutal.
She’d pushed Delilah hard, maybe harder than usual, harder than her elbow liked, that was for sure. But Delilah hadn’t complained. She’d taken every ball, every correction, with her jaw tight and her eyes bright.
Cassie had just handed her a towel when she caught the shape at the edge of her vision. Standing on the next court, arms folded, sunglasses perched in her hair, barking at a twelve-year-old girl to get the dropshot sorted. Petra.
It brought back memories. Some good, some bad.
But Cassie didn’t let her expression shift. She nodded once at Delilah, who was now guzzling water like she’d been dragged through a desert.
‘Cool down. Foam roll after. I’ll meet you at the mess hall.’
Delilah gave a half-salute with the bottle.
Cassie turned away and walked toward the far end of the court, towards the dining hall. She didn’t realise Petra was following until she was in step with her. ‘She’s not a tennis player.’
Cassie didn’t answer. She kept walking.
‘Cass.’
Cassie span to Petra. ‘Don’t call me that.’
Petra smiled. ‘Come on. You know what I mean. I’ve been watching. Who is she? Why would you bring her here?’
Cassie came to a stop and turned to Petra.
‘It’s none of your business.’
Petra tilted her head, a wry smile on her lips. ‘Oh, I think it might be. This is my place, and your being here is a favour.’
Cassie sighed. ‘Then kick us out.’
Petra pretended she hadn’t said that. ‘Since when do you play mentor, anyway? You walked out of the game after… I thought you were done.’
‘What do you care how done I am?’ Cassie said, trying to stay cool.
‘I’ve been keeping tabs on you,’ Petra told her. ‘You coach amateurs now, right? Is that what she is? Maybe some rich girl who wants to play at being Serena?’
Cassie had forgotten this way of talking that Petra had. The way that always made Cassie feel two steps behind, like she was about to lose a point in a game she hadn’t even realised they were playing. She didn’t miss it.
‘Why do you care?’ Cassie asked her. It was the only way to put her on the back foot. Accuse her of emotion. Petra didn’t like to be caught feeling things.
Petra shrugged, too casual. ‘Maybe I’m just curious.’
‘She’s someone trying to be better. That’s all you need to know,’ Cassie told her flatly. She wouldn’t give Petra anything more than that. You never knew how she’d use information.
Petra gave her a long look. ‘OK, Cassie.’
Cassie looked away. In the distance, Delilah had moved to the side of the court, head down, working on stretches like she was trying to make herself invisible.
‘Is that it? Are you done with this interrogation?’
‘You think that’s what this is?’ Petra’s voice was softer now. ‘I just wanted to talk to you. It’s been a long time.’
‘Whose fault is that?’ Cassie asked.
Petra exhaled. ‘Cassie—’
‘Don’t.’
Petra moved in a step closer, something flickering in her eyes. ‘Are you seeing anyone?’
Cassie laughed. ‘Seriously? You want to know who I’m seeing?’
Petra’s expression quickly shifted into something emptier. ‘I’m just—’
‘Concerned?’ Cassie cut in. ‘Don’t be. You made your feelings pretty clear when you dumped me the minute I wasn’t useful anymore.’
Petra almost flinched. ‘I didn’t dump you because you weren’t useful,’ she said quickly. ‘You were… Christ. Things were changing. You were so fucking angry. I didn’t know how to talk to you anymore.’
Cassie shook her head. ‘You didn’t try. You saw my career ending, and you got out early. That’s what happened.’
Petra looked down, arms folded over her chest. ‘That’s not what happened.’
‘It’s not?’ Cassie’s voice rose, but not loud. In the back of her mind, she wanted to ensure this did not reach as far as Delilah. ‘You were my coach. You were my partner. And the second my career was over, you were gone. No warning. No conversation. Just a voicemail and then you blocked me.’
‘I was overwhelmed,’ Petra admitted.
‘So was I,’ Cassie said. ‘I’d lost everything I’d worked for. And then I lost you.’
They stood there for a moment, the silence heavy with all the things neither of them had ever gotten to say. Petra’s arm twitched, like it wanted to reach out. Cassie took a step back.
‘If you’re here to stir up shit, don’t. I’ve got better things to do.’ She turned and walked away, not looking back once.
Cassie kept walking, her steps heavy, deliberate, until she reached the edge of the property where the courts gave way to a narrow, overgrown trail. She ducked into the shade of the trees, where the sun barely touched the ground, and finally let herself slump against the trunk of a gnarled oak.
Her hands shook slightly as she pressed them to her face.
She wasn’t crying for Petra; she didn’t want her back.
No, it was everything: the career cut short, the loss of control, the years of discipline and sacrifice that had amounted to nothing.
She was supposed to be something, and it wasn’t… this.
Tears came, and she let them fall. She let herself feel the grief and hurt and disappointment for once in her life. It hurt like hell.
Then a voice broke in. ‘Cassie…’ Delilah said softly and tentatively.
Cassie lifted her head, shocked, wiping at her cheeks. ‘It’s nothing,’ she said.
Delilah shook her head. ‘It’s not nothing.’
Cassie didn’t know what to say. But then Delilah sat down next to her. She didn’t say anything else. They sat like that for a long minute. Cassie let herself lean back into the trunk again, a little less rigid. Not comforted, exactly. But not alone.
Delilah reached out, hand hovering near her shoulder, then settled it lightly on the tree. Still, she didn’t say anything.