16. Wyatt
16
WYATT
Little changes in the week leading up to our supposed honeymoon. Matthias goes to work. I spend my days in the garden, Corbin silently assisting me as needed. Jules keeps me fed with all my favorite foods from my childhood on a steady rotation.
My daily check-ins with Jackson keep me sane. They remind me of why I’m doing this.
Really, nothing changes. But somehow, everything has.
It has because Matthias won’t tell me what he was dreaming about, nor why he sleeps with a weapon underneath his pillow.
Because he’s not sleeping in bed with me.
For all his insistence that we have to be seen “keeping up appearances”, he seems to have had a change of heart. I don’t know where he’s laying his head these days, but it’s sure as shit not on the pillow beside mine.
I don’t know why it annoys me. I should be reveling in the extra space, satisfied I’ve gotten my own way, and relieved I don’t have to share a bed with someone I hate.
But I don’t. Most of all, because I’m not sure I hate him. Not as I once did. Everything that happened the night of the gala opened my eyes to how many secrets Matthias has been keeping from me. To the demons that haunt his sleep.
To the danger he believes himself to be in.
Add in my unexpected reaction to the kiss, and what happened in the shower…yeah. I don’t think I can say I hate Matthias anymore.
Doesn’t mean I particularly like the fucker. But there’s no denying that it’s cracked open the vault I’ve kept him in all this time. It hasn’t opened the door, but it’s enough . Enough to have me questioning everything.
There hasn’t been a repeat of the shower incident. What’s more, Matthias seems to be going out of his way to avoid me. There’s been no more teasing. No more flirting. No playing games of any sort.
No more dares.
I should be happy about it because it seems like I’ve won, but I’m not happy. Without the hate, without the games, I don’t know where I stand. I don’t know what this is.
I know what it’s supposed to be. A fake marriage. A solution for both our problems.
I just wish I could stop thinking about him. How his lips felt against mine. Why it felt so right to push my leg between his. The sense of power I got from him watching me with desperation and need.
All in all, I’m strangely relieved when the honeymoon rolls around. Mostly because Matthias can’t escape me on a private island. Maybe spending more time with him will straighten out the fucking chaos going on in my brain. Maybe I can get some explanations as to what’s been going on with him.
Maybe I can reconcile the boy I once knew with the man he’s become.
One can only hope, anyway.
“You have a private jet? Of course you do,” I murmur as the car pulls into the airport tarmac. Rain patters on the roof of the car, matching my cynical mood. I went searching for him last night and didn’t find him. It put me on edge. Even my dreams were filled with images of him.
“I share it with my brothers,” Matthias explains as we step outside, water hitting my face immediately. It’ll be nice to be somewhere in the tropics where the sun actually shines. Perhaps that will put me in a better mood, or at least illuminate what’s going on with me and Matthias.
We never fought as kids, never got into arguments, or even disagreed.
And yet here we are—quiet, avoiding one another.
The driver pulls our bags out of the trunk and then wheels them toward the plane. My hand moves up to my face to clear the rain from it, but I don’t say anything else. I just walk beside Matthias under his umbrella, the sound of the rain hitting the nylon matching the rhythm of my heart.
Matthias looks tired today. Dark circles sit under his eyes and his hair isn’t as neatly combed as it usually is. He still looks put-together, but I can tell that something is wrong.
Something has not been right since that night. Apparently, Matthias’s way of dealing with it is to just…not.
Figures. He ghosted me over a decade ago when shit hit the fan. Why was I expecting different behavior this time?
Without a word, we walk up the stairs to the plane and are immediately greeted by a flight attendant—a beautiful woman with long black hair and bright blue eyes.
“Welcome, Mr. Buckingham and Mr. Buckingham,” she says.
Matthias nods, tucking the umbrella under a seat, and then he peers over at me when I look a little too long at her. Damn, she looks familiar. Like someone I met in another life. Or maybe we ran into one another years ago. It’s nothing more than that. I just want to know why I recognize her. And because of that, my eyes sort of seem to stick on her and hers on me. Maybe she recognizes me too.
My gaze flicks down to her name tag. Clarissa. But that doesn’t ring a bell. I honestly can’t place her.
“You can stop staring,” Matthias says hotly as he takes a seat, buckling himself in and folding his arms across his chest.
“What? I wasn’t staring,” I reply, my cheeks heating. I mean, I might have been, but it wasn’t intentional. It was just…I sigh as Clarissa interrupts my thoughts.
“Can I get you anything? Champagne? Water?” she asks.
I sit down opposite Matthias and nod. “Anything stronger than wine?”
Clarissa smiles, her eyes flashing over to Matthias, who is glaring at her. “Of course. What would you like?”
“Whiskey?”
“And you, Mr. Buckingham?”
“Water,” he says, finally looking away. He turns his gaze out the window, his jaw clicking.
When Clarissa leaves to grab our drinks, I knock his foot with mine. “What’s wrong? Seriously, what’s up with you?”
He doesn’t look at me, just pulls his foot back toward him, tucking it under his seat so as not to come into contact with me.
“Oh, come the fuck on. Are you just going to ignore me the entire honeymoon?”
He peers over at me and then back out the window, not giving me a response.
Well, fuck him then , I think as I huff in annoyance. He can pretend I don’t exist. It’s not like I’m not used to that from him. It’s fine. I don’t want to be in this stupid marriage anyway.
I wish I could believe that, but with every second that ticks by, the urge to make him talk grows stronger. When Clarissa brings me my drink a few minutes later, I gulp it down before she can even step away. It burns as it goes down and settles uneasily in my stomach.
“Another. Please,” I murmur, and she thankfully says nothing about my mood shift or my sudden need for more alcohol. Instead, she takes my glass and steps away to do as I asked.
“Seriously, Matthias. Stop being a dick. Tell me what’s wrong? Why are you avoiding me?” I ask when he continues to ignore me. It’s making me itch, making me squirm.
It’s been a fucking long week with him like this.
“Isn’t that what you wanted?” Matthias finally asks, sipping his water, trying to regain his composure, but I see the fissures, the cracks. He’s splitting wide open.
“I mean…” I catch myself with a frown. “Yeah, I guess it was.”
“There you go then.”
I glower at him. “That’s all you have to say?”
He doesn’t respond and doesn’t turn my way the entire trip. I end up sleeping for some of it, tossing and turning in my seat, trying to push Matthias from my mind, but it’s hard.
Fuck him for coming into my life and then stepping right back out, like he couldn’t be bothered with me. Just like he did all those years ago. He consumed me before leaving me hollow and broken.
Infuriating is what he is. Unfeeling and unkind.
I’m kicking myself for letting him back in a little, only for him to do it all over again.
When the plane finally lands on the island, my mood has completely plummeted. I’m angry, frustrated, and more than a little hopeless. Not to mention, I’m tired and slightly nauseous from the turbulence. But as soon as I step from the plane, the warm sun greets me and I feel myself perking back up.
“Fuck yes,” I murmur, enjoying how the rays feel on my exposed skin.
“Told you you’d like the sun,” he says as he passes me by and then without another word, makes his way toward the car waiting for us, leaving me to trail after him like some kind of pet. I hate it.
But this is what I wanted, right? I wanted him to pretend I didn’t exist. And he is.
Not sleeping in our bed, not meeting my gaze, not speaking to me. I’m a fucking ghost of his past.
Just like I wanted.
Why can’t I accept that?
I pout as the car door closes behind us and the driver makes his way toward our final destination. The entire drive is marked with silence, the only sound coming from the vents above us, blowing cool air onto my face. It is warm here, my body growing overheated.
With a yank, I pull my sweater off and toss it aside, catching Matthias’s gaze. It flicks toward me before moving back to the window. But I see the flush on his cheeks, the way he inhales shakily.
Something moves through me.
That delicious little thrill I get when I make him cave.
For some reason, the competitive streak inside of me makes me want to get him to look at me.
Don’t be silly. Look at me, Matt.
I want his attention, damnit. I shouldn’t, but I do.
The car pulls up a long driveway, palm trees and banana plants line the drive, and a minute later, we arrive at a large house sitting right on the edge of the beach.
“We’re here,” Matthias says unnecessarily as the car rolls to a stop.
I don’t wait for the driver to open the door for us. I just step out and inhale the salty breeze. Fuck, this is nice. I can’t believe I argued against this, that I didn’t want to go on a honeymoon to a tropical island.
This is so fucking nice. When was the last time I was able to just relax?
It’s been ages. So damn long.
I tilt my head back and feel the sun on my face once more. As I do this, I can feel his gaze on me the entire time, watching me intently. But I don’t look his way, just let him ogle his fill until he finally turns around and walks away.
In the distance, I hear the front door open and close and I let out a long breath.
He can fucking run but he was always terrible at hiding. I always found him.
And this time is no different.
* * *
The villa is expansive, everything beach-themed and luxurious. All of the rooms are open and bright. Alive. Exotic flowers sit on end tables, and windows look out to the ocean beyond. It’s beautiful. Everything about this is picturesque. It’s exactly what I imagined it would be.
My gaze travels around the space and I realize Matthias is nowhere to be found. Of course he’s hiding. It’s what he likes to do when things get hard.
I move through the living room, kicking off my shoes and unbuttoning my shirt as I go, letting the warm air hit my exposed skin. Shit, that’s nice. So much better than the rain and cold of the Pacific Northwest.
Matthias would love this, but he’s not around.
I should just enjoy my time here on this island alone. If Matthias wants to ignore me, then he can. But that hidden part of me that rose up on the way here appears again. This time stronger.
Defiance.
I won’t let him ignore me.
The game is no fun if he’s not a participant.
And to be honest, I’m lonely. A part of me remembers how we were ages ago, when we were just children, how good it was, how fun. I miss that.
I miss who we were.
And yet I know we can’t go back. There are too many new feelings. Too many things have changed.
Still, I can’t help myself. I don’t understand the part of me that covets his attention, and I’m tired of trying to. There’s no way to analyze it that makes it make sense.
The only thing I’m sure about is I want him to look at me.
Make him see me.
I step outside but he’s not there. Instead, lush plants cover the garden—bird of paradise, hibiscus, yellow elders. It’s the perfect spot to relax in. Heaven.
I spot the infinity pool and groan loudly. It’s overlooking the ocean, the sunshine sparkling on the surface like glitter. I’ve never seen a more inviting sight.
Part of me wants to strip down and just sink into it, to just let the water wash it all away.
No one is around to see me if I do. Matthias sure as hell isn’t.
Fuck it.
My hands move to the bottom of my shirt and I tug it off, letting it flutter to the ground. Next, I unbutton my pants and then I’m kicking them off as well.
And without even trying to talk myself out of it, I’m naked.
My feet carry me to the edge of the pool, my cock and balls swinging between my legs, and without another thought, I plunge in, letting the lukewarm water wash over me. My ears pop as I sink to the bottom of the pool and my eyes open, everything blurry before me.
Bubbles float to the top of the water as I emerge, gasping for breath. And then I sink again, drifting to the edge of the pool which looks out over the horizon.
The sun glimmers over me as I emerge. The blue sky lightens my mood and some of the tension I’ve been carrying slips away.
That’s when I hear a throat clearing behind me.
Turning to look over my shoulder, I see Matthias standing there, looking as put-together as always.
But he’s looking at me. Finally. His attention is on me .
And that’s where I want it to fucking stay.
I turn all the way around and spread my arms out behind me, resting them on the edge of the infinity pool.
Matthias’s eyes travel down my exposed chest and he shifts on his feet. He’s silent, just as he has been all week.
“You going to join me?” I smirk. “Or stand there and watch me? Again.”
I can see the muscle in his jaw twitch and he turns his gaze away.
“No. I just wanted to let—” His words trail off, and I cup a hand behind my ear.
“Hm? I can’t hear you.”
His eyes narrow, and I bite back a smirk. But I don’t move, don’t concede, just stay where I am, wanting him to come to me.
“You’ll have to come closer,” I say loudly, and his eyes shut, nostrils flaring as he takes a few steps forward.
“Better?”
“Nope. Still got nothing.”
“You’re a liar. And a bad one at that.”
I shrug and then he steps up to the edge of the pool, his suit impeccable, not a wrinkle in sight.
“Come here, Wy.”
I eye him and then dip under the water, swimming toward him, emerging right at his feet. His shoes look fancy up close. I shake my head and send water dripping over them.
Better.
“Can you hear me now?” he asks, looking down at me. He looks so domineering, so angry.
A strand of his dark hair falls over his forehead as I smile up at him.
“Perfectly clear. What did you need?” I ask innocently.
His tongue peeks out and he wets his mouth. “I just wanted to let you know I’m going to be doing some work this week.”
I cock my head. “Do you ever not work?”
“I have business I need to attend to.”
“On our honeymoon?”
“A sham of one,” he says softly, and something inside of me cracks. Fuck him. Fuck him and fuck this marriage. Fuck him for ignoring me and not sleeping with me and not even looking in my eyes when he speaks.
My arms suddenly wrap around his legs and I yank. His entire body shifts forward and a moment later he splashes into the water. His shoulder knocks into mine as he falls on top of me and we both sink, his arms wrapping around me. I stare at him under the water, our gazes holding for a long second before we both emerge. His eyes are wide with shock as he gulps down air, and I can’t help the laugh sputtering out of me.
“What the fuck?” he growls.
“What? You asked for it. And really, you need to loosen up,” I reply, shoving at his shoulders. He’s still in his suit and it sticks to his skin, to his defined muscles. They look even bigger now.
His gaze darkens and then he moves toward me, dragging me toward him. His fingers dig into my biceps as my legs knock into his.
“You ruined my suit. Do you know how expensive this was?”
“Good. I hope it shrinks,” I spit out, and his eyes drop to my lips. I wet them and his nostrils flare.
And then I’m lurching forward and biting onto the side of his jaw.
His intake of breath doesn’t deter me. It just spurs me on. My tongue slips out and drags across his skin, making his fingers flex against me.
When he doesn’t react, I do the same thing to his ear, biting on the lobe with force, making him grunt in response.
Good. I want him to hurt.
Like I do.
“Wy,” he warns.
“Why don’t you fucking stop me?” I egg him on.
My teeth bite on his ear again and he inhales sharply. And before I know it, I’m spun around and pressed against the side of the pool, his body against mine, my legs wrapped around his waist.
“Don’t toy with me.”
“But you like it,” I whisper and then nip at his cheek. His hand clasps my jaw and wrenches my head back, exposing my neck.
“Do I?”
I arch my hips and drag my groin against his hardening cock.
“Yes.”
As I swallow, I feel the drag of his lips against my Adam’s apple. A growl grows inside of him, moving through his chest and into mine as he slides his mouth up my neck to my chin. It hovers over my lips as our eyes clash.
“Do it,” I rasp. “I dare you.”
Those pupils dilate and then his lips sink against mine, warm and lush.
My entire body combusts, my hands move from the side of the pool into his hair as I pull him closer. He slants his head and my tongue delves into his mouth. A low groan rumbles from him as I taste him. I swallow it down, my cock thickening between my legs as I do.
Fuck. Fuck .
I arch my hips up again and I feel him tremble against me as I drag my dick across his.
He’s just as hard as me.
Just as needy.
I suck on his tongue, and he bites mine, a war of sorts until we’re both moaning, hands grasping, bodies thrusting as we try to find relief.
But then suddenly he wrenches himself away from me, his chest heaving, his cheeks pink.
“Wha—” I begin, but he stops me with a swipe of his hand through his hair.
His lips twitch in anger, his gaze turned away from me.
“This what you wanted?” he finally asks and huffs in frustration. “You happy now? You win. You fucking win , Wy.”
And then without another word, he pulls himself out of the pool, water sluicing off his soaked clothes and onto the ground as he stalks toward the house.
I can do nothing but watch him go, my mind reeling. What the fuck?
I lean against the side of the pool as something desperate pushes through me. He’s always fucking leaving me.
No. Not this time.
My fingers curl on the cement and I pull myself out of the pool, walking so quickly into the house that I almost slip and fall on the wet tile. But I catch myself as the adrenaline spurs me forward, striding toward the hallway that I assume holds the rooms.
Without hesitation, I push open the doors to the rooms one by one until I find the one Matthias is in. He’s stripped down to his boxers, his eyes surprised when he sees me stalking toward him.
“What are you doing?” he asks, his cheeks flushed.
I don’t say a word in response, just continue toward him, my hands landing on his chest and pushing him roughly against the wall. His head knocks against the plaster as I lean into him.
“Wy,” he whispers as my fingers sink into his hair and pull .
“Shut up. Just don’t fucking speak.”
My lips slam onto his and he groans as our bodies twine together, his hands sliding to my ass and pulling me against him. Closer. So close. I can feel the beat of his heart against my chest, the way his cock thickens in his boxers.
Mine is already hard, rutting against his as I thrust my hips against him. Over and over. More. Give me fucking more .
He moans as I fuck my tongue into him, licking my way around his mouth. Our teeth clash and I swallow the filthy sounds he’s making. My own groans are slipping from my throat, telling him exactly how much I like this.
How much I want this.
Oh fuck. Oh fuck . This… this …
His fingers curl into my ass cheeks as the two of us grind against each other, wet and desperate.
I can feel my cock leaking, can feel my balls hard and drawing up.
His moans, the way he tastes.
I kiss him harder, and he whimpers. Needy.
Matthias Buckingham needs me.
I grind into him harder, pulling him toward the edge. And who am I kidding? I’m teetering right there with him, ready to fall, to let him fucking destroy me just like all those years ago.
Tearing me apart, piece by piece.
My lips pull away from his and I stare into his eyes, our gazes locked as I continue to move against him.
“Wy,” he breathes, and I lean forward, brushing my lips against his earlobe, feeling him tremble.
“You gonna come, Matt?”
He groans, and then I feel it, his body shaking, tensing. And the knowledge I made him come lights something inside of me. My cock aches for release, but he’s still tumbling over that edge, his orgasm long and intense. Finally, he sags against me, his forehead hitting my shoulder. I can hear him breathing, rasping as he holds on to me.
“Oh my god,” he murmurs. “I can’t—that happened. Oh god.”
I don’t move, just stand there, waiting.
And then without warning, without a word, he falls to his knees and his nose drags up my bare cock. I watch as he opens his mouth and engulfs me. The sensation, warm, tight.
It’s too much.
My eyes roll back in my head and my fingers curl into his hair as he pulls me into him.
I glance back down and his eyes are on my face, those dark irises lighting up when he sees the way I want this.
Oh fuck.
This. Is. Everything .
My hand tugs him closer, feeling my dick tunnel down his throat, and when it contracts, I let out a filthy groan as I unload directly into his stomach. He swallows over and over, his moans traveling through my groin and settling in my thighs. I quiver, shake, and nearly collapse as my orgasm rolls through me.
And then, when it’s over, I sag slightly, trying to catch my breath as he releases me and falls backward, cum lingering on his lips.
I stare down at him, completely and utterly ruined.
There. I finally caught him. He’s on his knees before me.
But the question is—now what?