CHAPTER 17
COLT
R uby had toothpaste all over her chin, and she was making eye contact with me in the mirror, scrunching her nose as she made silly faces and grinned around her toothbrush.
She spit, making a mess, before she rinsed her mouth and turned to face me. “Daddy, when’s Blaire coming home?”
I leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, ignoring the unease twisting in my gut. “She’ll be back soon. I’m pretty sure she went to dinner with Miss Maggie.”
“I don’t like it when she’s not here.” Ruby’s voice shrank, the words hitting me square in the chest.
I could barely look at her as I reached for the towel, gently scrubbing at her chin while my mind raced between what I should say and what I wanted to be true.
I dabbed at a spot of toothpaste near her lip, buying seconds while my hands betrayed me with their slight tremor. I opened my mouth to warn her that Blaire was temporary, that people always left eventually, but looking into those trusting eyes, the words died somewhere between my chest and tongue.
“Me neither,” I said, my voice catching.
I forced a smile that felt like a grimace, searching her face while something inside me twisted between wanting to shield her from disappointment and needing to prepare her for it.
I pushed her hair back from her forehead, then ruffled the damp strands, letting my hand linger a moment.
Scooping her up, I carried her to her bedroom and dropped us onto her mattress with a huff, sending stuffed animals flying and Ruby into a fit of giggles.
Ruby threw her arms around my neck, squeezing tight, then flopped backward onto her mountain of unicorns, cats, one battered, stuffed blue dog, and Blaire’s Duke sweatshirt that was tucked under her pillow.
“Bedtime, baby girl.” I pulled back her covers, but she hopped down and scurried to her bookshelf.
Her tiny finger ran along the spines as she deliberated which book would send us off to bed, and I watched her with a smile, though I could feel my pulse throbbing at my temples.
The house had never felt this empty before Blaire, not in all the years since it was just Ruby and me.
Now her absence echoed through the rooms because I’d carved space for her in our routines.
Against every instinct screaming caution, I’d invited her into the fragile rhythm we’d built.
And now, with her gone for just one evening, the silence was deafening.
I checked my phone. No notifications. I should’ve put it away, but my thumb found Blaire’s name anyway. I typed out a message, thumb hovering, before I deleted it. My thumb froze above the screen, caught between the gravity of missing her and my pride, but then I hit send.
Colt: You okay?
Ruby pulled a book from the shelf before she climbed back into the bed with Where the Wild Things Are clutched to her chest.
“Classic,” I said as she wriggled under the covers, and I took the book. Just as I settled in, my phone vibrated against my chest. I snatched it up and stared down at the screen.
Blaire: Yes.
That was it. One word.
I glowered at the screen until Ruby started kicking her feet impatiently at my side. Then I set the phone down and opened the book. I read the story with Ruby’s head on my chest, and I was about halfway through when her sleepy eyes looked up at me.
“Is Blaire mad at us?”
She was watching me with a seriousness I wasn’t used to seeing on my little girl. I remembered her mother’s last days, and the confusion that lingered in Ruby’s gaze for months after. She had been so young, but Becca had still been her mother. It was a look I never wanted to see on her face again.
My jaw tightened. “Of course not, baby. She’s spending time with her friend.”
“I’m her friend.” Ruby’s nose scrunched, and fuck, I wanted to protect her from the world. I wanted to shield her from getting her heart broken if Blaire decided to leave again, though part of me knew I was just as terrified for myself.
“That’s true, but Maggie is her boring friend and sometimes grown-ups need to talk about boring stuff for a little while.”
Ruby nodded as if what I’d said made complete sense, and her eyes went heavy with sleep again. “Will you ask her to braid my hair before school?”
“I will,” I whispered, and stayed like that for a while, listening to her shallow breaths and the occasional soft snore.
I set the book aside, careful not to disturb Ruby’s loose grip on my arm and reached to click off the lamp. The room fell into darkness except for the moonlight sneaking through the gap in her curtains, splashing a pale glow across her cheek.
The house was quiet, leaving me with nothing but my thoughts and an uneasiness I couldn’t shake. I grabbed my phone again, and the screen lit up my face. My thumb hovered as I typed out a dozen different messages and deleted every single one.
The memory of Blaire’s face at the bakery this morning haunted me.
Her brown eyes had widened when she saw me, enough that I could see the fleck of gold in her irises before they’d clouded with hurt.
She’d rushed out after Chelsey leaned into me and asked about our playdate, and she hadn’t even glanced back when I called her name.
I didn’t have a date with Chelsey Leland. Christ. My stomach turned at the thought. Sure, she was pretty, but whenever she smiled at me, all I could hear was her voice bouncing off metal lockers, that vicious nickname for Blaire spreading through the halls like poison.
“Brother fucker.”
The memory still made my teeth grind together. Back then, I’d wanted to stand in front of Blaire, shield her from those whispers with my body. And if I’m honest, some irrational, possessive part of me couldn’t stand hearing her name linked to anyone but me—not then, not now.
Even if it was my brother.
But Mia, Chelsey’s daughter, and Ruby were inseparable at school, and I couldn’t deprive my daughter of that friendship because Chelsey’s hand lingered too long on my arm whenever we talked.
I’d done nothing wrong, so why did I feel so guilty?
I dropped the phone on my chest, hoping the weight would pin me down and keep me from doing something stupid.
Ruby squirmed in her sleep, rolled over, and mumbled something I couldn’t understand.
I brushed hair from her forehead, wishing I could keep her world simple and untouched by all the adult shit that kept me up at night.
The silence pressed in until my thumb was back at it, scrolling up and down the chat, searching for a less pathetic thing to say, but nothing came.
Colt: Ruby was asking for you. She misses you.
I hit send, knowing it was a cop-out to hide behind my daughter, but Blaire replied almost instantly.
Blaire: Tell her we’ll hang out before school in the morning.
I glanced at Ruby’s sleeping form, her chest rising and falling in the dim light, then back to the screen.
Colt: You got a shipment of labels in. They look good.
Colt: But what the hell is Saddle Up Strawberry Jam?
I’d opened the box this afternoon, not realizing it was hers, and I couldn’t help but laugh at the pretty pastel label covered in little red strawberries all wearing a ten-gallon hat.
Blaire: June’s Jams- Cowboy Collection. ????
Blaire: Saddle Up Strawberry, Buckle Bunny Berry Blend, Rodeo Raspberry, Cherry Wrangler, and Giddy Up Grape.
I snorted as I read the lineup. This was the same girl who’d once set off the smoke
alarm making boxed mac and cheese, standing on a chair to wave a dish towel while cursing like a sailor. But when Blaire believed in something, she got this look in her eyes, like she could see straight through to what mattered.
I carefully climbed from Ruby’s bed with my phone clutched in my hand. I looked back at my girl one last time before I quietly closed the door.
Colt: Are you making this up?
Blaire: No! We already have preorders!
Blaire: Also, June says y’all are modeling for our marketing.
Blaire: Go ahead and prepare yourself, cowboy.
A weird pang of nerves hit me. I didn’t know if she was needling me, but the idea of her thinking about my body at all made my pulse quicken.
Colt: I’m almost 30. I’m not sure anyone wants to see that.
The text bubbles appeared as she typed, and fuck, it felt good to talk to her like this.
Blaire: Oh, yes. I’m sure no one wants to see a single daddy cowboy with abs.??
Colt: How do you know I have abs?
Blaire: I don’t. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you naked.That would be a sad day if they were gone.
Her words caught me off guard. A warmth spread through me that made me shift my weight and lean against the counter. I swallowed hard, suddenly aware of every inch of denim against my skin.
Blaire: Maybe I could ask that one cowboy I met at The Dusty Spur?What was his name?
My blood went hot, burning through every rational thought. She was baiting me, and damn her, it was working.
Colt: That’s not fucking happening.
Blaire: That’s not really up to you.
Her next text came so fast I didn’t have a chance to respond to the first.
Blaire: Though I should probably see him naked too. What kind of businesswoman would I be without quality control.
I wanted to drive straight into town and throw her over my shoulder and carry her home. Instead, I clenched my jaw and sent another text.
Colt: Blaire Wilma Monroe, don’t fuck with me.
Blaire: Colt Oliver Calloway, don’t tell me what to do.
My neck cracked as I rotated it, trying to ease the tension coiling inside me. It was a futile attempt to quiet the hunger I felt for her and that mouth that knew exactly how to push every one of my buttons.
Colt: You going to be home soon?
Blaire: Why? Do YOU miss me?
My heart jumped in my throat, a surge of hope I immediately tried to strangle. God, she had to know that I did. But before I could decide whether to answer her honestly or play it safe, the next message came as if she regretted giving me the opening at all.
Blaire: I’m at dinner with Maggie. I’ll be back soon.
I paced through the living room, my free hand raking through my hair.
Colt: Tell Maggie I said hi.
Colt: And yes, I always miss you.
I stared at what I’d sent, my pulse hammering so hard I could feel it in my fingertips. Those words burned on the screen like a confession ripped from me that I couldn’t take back.
The three dots appeared, disappeared, and appeared again. I felt like I couldn’t breathe while I waited for her response.
Blaire: If you needed company, you should’ve taken Chelsey to dinner.
“Fuck,” I swore under my breath, turning to stare out the windows where moonlight spilled across the lake.