Nathaniel #4
“Don’t get me wrong it’s hard because I don’t want her to be hurt.
I failed her on that once and won’t again.
” I took a bite of the sirloin bites wrapped in puff pastry.
They were like mini meat pie and one of my favorite items on the menu.
When I looked at Charmy she was giving me that puppy look again that let me know she didn’t think I’d failed but she was allowing me to be vulnerable. And damn, I really needed that.
“You can’t carry guilt over whatever his name was. I’ve heard the story and frankly he sounds like an awful man. That’s his lack of character, not yours.”
“I hear you. The way you know what to say…I don’t think twice about sharing stuff with you. That’s how I know you’re it for me.”
That bashful grin was back on her face as she rested her chin in her hand. “Just that easy?”
“When it comes to you, yeah. This relationship shit doesn’t have to be hard.
I’ve watched hard. My brother let honor prevent him from getting what he wanted, which was Yzzy.
But my Black ass would never be guilty of that.
But that’s also why he’s a better man than I’ll ever be.
People thought he was crazy but honor is a big deal around here.
It’s served us well for a lot of generations and Sampson takes that shit to heart.
He wouldn’t have been able to look at himself or love his lady properly if he didn’t come to her with clean hands.
So I understand why he moved the way he did. ”
“But you wouldn’t have.”
“Hell nah. Didn’t I just tell you he was a better man than me?
That wasn’t lip service. I’m telling you right now, I’ll send your parents a damn wedding announcement before I let you deny me for two years.
And I know a man that can get me a wedding license and a tech guy that can make that shit official.
” She was giggling because she truly didn’t understand the type of men I knew.
“You trying to put your stamp on me is precious. I’m not worrying about them questioning you or thinking I’m being rash. But if it comes down to it, I’ll be the one to explain things to them. And soon, because nobody has time for you to give my daddy a heart attack sending over a marriage license.”
“Good. The last thing I need is to be worried about my Black ass catching another body because you done hurt my feelings.” I went back to happily eating my food re-energized since she reassured me she wasn’t playing in my face.
I realized that Charmy had gone silent and looked over at her.
She was scrutinizing my face and I had no idea why she was staring at me like that. “What?”
“ANOTHER body—”
I stopped her with a raise of my hand because I wasn’t about to explain a damn thing. “Not a thing you need to know about, Fairy. Do you think your parents will think you’re moving too fast?”
Bringing them back up was the easiest way to get her mind off me and my extracurriculars. “I think they’ll question your motives and my mind honestly.”
“You being here is showing you how life will be when you’re mine.
Not to be a dick but there are plenty of women who are smart and successful and are cool with just being a booty call.
Nothing against them but they are plentiful.
And if that’s all it was there were other avenues.
But not with you. Not to me. And now that I’ve met you, you’re for damn sure not about to be that for anyone else. ”
“Possessive?” The idea clearly pleased her and it was crazy to me that Charmy didn’t understand the magnetism she possessed.
I’m sure that fuck nigga she was fake dating had a lot to do with it since it prevented her from forming any real attachments.
Good for me because it brought her into my life but I would’ve found my way to her somehow.
But for it to have stunted her growth for all of her twenties pissed me off.
“Nah. I just plan to show you even more that the person you are would never give someone who didn’t hold her in the highest regard the time of day. I’m going to love you in ways that haven’t even been invented yet so no regular degular muthafucka just offering dick would ever tempt you.”
“Because I’m special.” She danced playfully like I would refute her claim instead of bolstering it.
“Always. Especially to me.”
“I still can’t believe you’re fine with what I told you.” Charmy was so used to that bitch nigga holding that shit over her head that she truly thought I was gonna stone her or some shit for being honest with me.
“Everybody got a past. What, I’m supposed to be angry that you’ve had sex before you met me?
Only weak niggas who are worried their stroke ain’t up to par worry about some shit like body counts.
You could’ve had a hunnid niggas before me, I’m still going to end up top two and I ain’t number two.
Besides, you mad about other women I’ve been with before? ”
She grinned at my off key singing but I knew this conversation wasn’t over this easily. “I mean now that you bring it up—”
“Charmy—”
She cracked up like stressing me out was her favorite pastime. “I’m teasing. While I don’t want to think of the innumerable number of conquests that you’ve had—”
“Stop right there. You using colonizer language. I don’t conquer anyone in the bedroom.
Not like that. I’m a lover and a fighter but women aren’t people to be conquered and claimed.
Taken over and held beneath me by force.
Shit sounds rapey as fuck. Force and violence ain’t got shit to do with me and my talents in the bed. ”
“So you’re saying you won’t keep putting me through the mattress?”