Chapter 9
NINE
KATHERINE
“What’s wrong, Aunt Kat?” Morgan asks while shoving a grilled cheese into her mouth. I grab a napkin quickly to brush off any crumbs from her lips, and Peyton laughs from the seat beside her.
We’re at a new shop that just opened this fall called Mint To Be Thyme; it’s a cute little sandwich-slash-soup type diner. She ordered a grilled cheese and tomato soup while I went with a turkey sandwich and yummy minestrone on the side. Peyton opted for a chicken and wild rice soup as big as Morgan’s head.
“Nothing, baby,” I say, focusing back on my food. Peyton clears her throat and I feel like a child under her watchful eye. She caught me.
“Really? You seemed so happy and chipper this morning, and now it feels like someone popped you like a balloon.”
Damn, she got that right. “It’s just—” I bite my lip. “I’ve been thinking a lot. Reflecting.”
“On?”
“Yeah, on what, Aunt Kat?” Morgan chimes in. She looks so much like her dad and it breaks my heart at the same time as it mends it. He lives on through her every day and that’s what all of us can ask for, really.
“On my life here. My purpose. What the hell I’m doing on this Earth.”
Peyton’s face turns serious. “Wait. Do we need to bring you to see someone? Like a professional? You should’ve called me earlier, I’m so sorry.”
I wave my hand. “Oh, no! It’s not like that, Pey! I’m serious, I’m fine. I’m just a little confused about how I’ve lived in this town for over thirty years and I’ve yet to explore the world.”
She seems to relax a bit while Morgan isn’t clued in on anything, happily munching on her grilled cheese. “Good, thank God. Just know I’ll always be here for you if that ever becomes the case. Bennett, too, I’m sure.”
“Yeah, I’m not so sure about that anymore. I don’t think that’s respectful to Camilla,” I say as best as I can with a cheerful tone.
Peyton gives me a look. “Just because he’s found someone else doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about you. We all care about you regardless of how things ended.”
I shrug. “I’m not too caught up in that, Peyton. It’s fine that he’s moved on. I’m happy about it, Camilla is lovely. But I’ll never have him cross boundaries just to make sure I’m okay. I’m not his priority anymore, she is.”
“Wow,” Peyton exclaims. She sits back on the chair and studies me. “That’s very mature of you.”
“Thanks,” I mumble. Not really something I wanted to be congratulated on.
“I’m serious. You and Bennett dealt with a lot. More than any couple should. So seeing you say this is…genuinely admirable.”
“Thanks,” I repeat, but this time I mean it. “But, yeah, I want to get out there more. Meet more people, live my life. Sure, I can stay in Alpine and keep my house, but I don’t want to be confined to this town forever. I want to visit people. Visit you .”
“We’d love for you to visit. Right, Morgan?”
She nods with a mouthful of grilled cheese and soup. I lean over again and wipe the tomato soup off her cheek. This was something that Peyton always reprimanded me and Bennett for doing. We loved to clean up Morgan’s messy eating habits. Peyton said it didn’t help her learn and actually made it harder for her to understand that she’s gotta do things on her own.
How can I stop though when she’s like a daughter to me and I get that instinct to watch over her? I don’t ever want children of my own, but Morgan is enough and gives me what I need when she’s around.
That makes me quickly think back to Lance. It’s such an odd thing, what’s been happening to us the last week and a half. Do people really get this deep into things this early on? Clearly we’re not really dating , but there’s more to it.
Him confessing that he has a bucket list yesterday morning seemed deep and personal—like he never really told anyone about that before. It felt too soon, but I wanted to tell him that I’d love to go on adventures with him and help knock off a few places from the list.
Too soon. Most definitely.
“So, how are things? Studio going well?” Peyton pulls me out of my thoughts. I nod and cross my arms over the table.
“They’re going really well, actually. My girls have a recital this Friday night and they’re nervous, but so excited.”
“That’s amazing! I bet they’re going to do so great. Do you want us to come watch?”
I shake my head. “No, you don’t have to if you already have plans.”
Peyton waves her hand. “Psh, we don’t make plans when we visit. We go with the flow. Except for Saturday, that one is planned.”
“Right, the party.” I almost whisper it and Peyton eyes me.
“You’re still going, right?”
“Please, come, Aunt Kat!” Morgan pleads with puppy eyes and tomato soup still on her lips and cheek. I laugh before leaning in to wipe again. She giggles and it makes me laugh too. Her happiness is so contagious.
“I’ll go for a little bit,” I finally say.
“Perfect, I heard it’s going to be a big one. Birdy is catering and helping decorate.”
“She’s great at that,” I remark. She really is—she’s got a knack for decorating and event planning. I’m surprised she hasn’t thought of doing it as a side hustle.
“She is,” Peyton agrees. “Bennett has also been building this little one’s home. Have you checked it out yet?”
“No, not yet,” I sigh. “I’ve been meaning to reach out to him about that, but I didn’t want to bother him with the party being so close. And Christmas in general. Busy times.” I wave my hand in the air.
“I’m sure he’d like to hear from you and see what you think of the progress that he’s made so far. We’re going to check it out later today. Why don’t you come?”
I would love to, but I don’t want to impose. It would be their time with Bennett, and he deserves that.
As if by some miracle the Universe heard my pleas for a reason to say no, my phone pings. I pull it out of my sweater pocket and see him . My cheeks burn and I quickly glance at Peyton before opening the text.
Lance
Busy tonight?
Me
For?
Lance
Lainey wants to play us a new song. And have a bonfire.
Me
Depends.
Lance
On?
Me
If there’ll be s’mores, duh.
Lance
Obviously.
I’m here at the store right now getting the ingredients.
Me
Good job, Cowboy.
Lance
I aim to please.
Me
Is that so?
Lance
six time wonder, over here. I plan to beat that record, btw.
I slam my phone down after reading his last message and I’m for sure blushing. I can feel the heat travel up my neck to my whole face. Peyton eyes me for a moment before she’s helping Morgan clean up her plate.
“Who was that?”
“No one,” I say a little too fast, “just a friend.”
“Do I know them?”
I can’t lie to Peyton, but maybe I can give her a white lie. “No, she’s a singer though. Asked me to come over tonight to listen to a new song she wrote.”
Peyton smiles. “That’s nice, you should go. Morgan probably wants alone time with Uncle BenBen anyways.”
I breathe a sigh of relief at her words. “Yeah, I don’t want to impose on Morgan and BenBen time.”
“Uncle BenBen better have my pink boots ready!” Morgan chimes in.
“He probably has a new color,” I say, wiggling my brows up and down. Morgan smiles the biggest smile ever and claps her hands with enthusiasm.
I glance back at my phone for a moment as Peyton gets up to put our used plates away.
Me
So we are fuck buddies. Good to know.
Lance
Hey, I only said it once. You’re prolonging this.
Me
I’m not prolonging anything. It’s enjoyable watching you squirm under pressure.
Lance
I don’t squirm, Darlin’.
Me
Then what do you do?
His response bubble with three dots pops up, but then disappears for a few moments and I can’t imagine what the hell he’s trying to type. Or if he’s rethinking what he truly wants to tell me.
My phone pings and the text finally appears.
Lance
I’ll show you tonight.
I close out the text thread as Peyton returns to the table. “Ready?” she asks, Morgan already jumping out of her seat. I nod and get up as well, grabbing Morgan’s hand. Peyton grabs her other one and we walk outside.
The weather is warming up a bit with the sun, but there’s a slight breeze that blows through my hair. We’re heading toward the parking spots where our cars are when Peyton turns to me, Morgan swinging our hands as she’s lost in her own little world already.
“Good luck with getting ready for the recital this week, it was so good seeing you. I’ll see you Friday night,” Peyton says, pulling me into a hug. I release Morgan’s hand and hug my friend tightly. I miss her every day, but know that New York is the best place she can be right now. Maybe one day, when she’s ready, she’ll move back to Alpine with Morgan.
Bennett is definitely hoping for that too, hence why he’s working fast to build her house.
“Love you,” I whisper into her hair as I hug her tighter. “I’ll see y’all Friday.”
I lean down and grab Morgan, wrapping her in a bear hug. She squeals from the sudden motion but hugs me back. “Love you, Aunt Kat. I’ll tell Uncle BenBen you said hi.”
“You do that, sweet pea.” I laugh, calling her the nickname that Bennett usually does, and kiss her cheek.
“Alright, honey,” Peyton calls out, starting to head toward the car. “We gotta make it back to his place to clean up before we see the progress on the house.”
Morgan gives me one last hug before running to her mom. I watch them go before I head to my own car.
There’s a newfound feeling of jitters I can’t explain just thinking about tonight with Lance. Even though I’ll be seeing Lainey too, it’s what he’s wanting to do after . God, I feel like a teenager! Like I’m a clueless virgin, unsure how to go about anything.
I whip my phone out once I’m in my car and look up some cute lingerie shops. Alpine has none and I don’t dare walk into Marla’s boutique looking for something as risqué as what I want.
There’s a shop thirty minutes away in Mason Pointe…perfect. I click the directions and start my car, pulling out of the parking spot and heading there.