Chapter Seven
Mia
We’d only been seated a few minutes when I noticed two women come in and request a table near us. Had they not pointed to Jackson, I wouldn’t have thought much of it. Except, now they were talking about me, low enough they could pretend it was a private conversation, but loud enough I could hear every word.
“Do you know them?” I asked him.
“Hmm?” He glanced their way before focusing on me again. “Yeah. They’re barrel racers. Anna and Lily. The blonde is Anna. I’m sure you’ve seen them around before.”
Had I? It was hard to remember. I’d never paid attention to that particular event. It was the bronc and bull riders who held my attention. Even team roping wasn’t bad. All right. Maybe what I’d really paid attention to were all the men in jeans and boots.
“Guess I don’t remember them,” I said. He glanced over the menu and I tried to do the same.
“Can you believe her?” Anna muttered, the bitterness evident in her voice. “She just waltzes in here and suddenly she’s the center of his world.”
Lily scoffed, folding her arms across her chest. “I know, right? It’s like he’s forgotten we even exist.”
Jackson froze and looked over at them. The look in his eyes made my stomach twist into knots. Exactly how well did he know them? Had he dated them? Or… No. He wouldn’t cheat on me, right?
“Something needs to change,” Anna said. Lily nodded in agreement, her gaze boring into us.
Jackson leaned down to murmur in my ear. “Ignore them. They’re being jealous and petty. You’re my wife and the only woman I want. You know that, right?”
I forced a smile and nodded, even though I felt a little inferior to the other women. They weren’t going to cause trouble, were they? Jackson didn’t seem the least bit interested in them. Surely they’d give up?
* * *
“Hey, Mia!” Anna called out to me the next morning. Her smile seemed forced. What rotten luck! Why did we have to be in the same motel? “You are Mia, right? Jackson’s wife?”
“Yes, I’m Mia. Just getting some fresh air.”
“Great, great,” Anna said. “You know, I was just thinking… It’s such a shame that Jackson doesn’t spend as much time with us anymore. You guys are always together.”
I shifted uncomfortably. “Well, we’re married. That’s kind of how it works.”
“Of course,” Anna agreed, nodding knowingly. “But it’s just… he used to be so close with Lily and me, you know? We were practically inseparable. And now we barely see him at all. And it’s not like being married means he has to be chained to you all the time, right?”
“Wait. Are you saying it’s my fault he doesn’t hang out with you anymore?” I asked.
“Hey, I didn’t say that,” Anna replied, holding up her hands in a gesture of innocence. “But it does make me wonder if he feels like he has to choose between us and you. I mean, rodeo life is difficult enough without feeling torn between friends and a wife, right?”
I frowned, wondering if she could be right. Did Jackson feel like he had to pick between being with his friends or spending time with me? Was I holding onto him too tight?
Glancing toward the motel office, where Jackson was extending our stay a few days, I saw Lily strut her way over to Jackson with a sweet smile plastered on her face. I couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy as she approached him, chatting away like they were old friends. They probably were, before I came into the picture. My heart ached at the thought of somehow ruining their friendship. But was that really all they had between them? They seemed… cozy.
I inched closer without even realizing it. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust him, but… I wasn’t sure I trusted her.
“Jackson,” Lily drawled, her southern accent thick and syrupy. “You know I’ve always cared for you, right?”
“You care for me? Seriously? Lily, you make it sound like we’ve dated or something, and last time I checked, we haven’t. We’re acquaintances and nothing more. I wouldn’t even consider us friends, even though you’ve certainly made it clear you want to be friends with benefits, so… what do you want? Just spit it out already.”
“Well, it’s just…” She hesitated, biting her lip in a practiced display of concern. “I can’t help but worry about you, darlin’. This whole thing with Mia… Are you sure she’s really the one for you?”
My pulse quickened, my ears straining to hear every word as I pretended to be looking elsewhere. The way Jackson had just spoken to her gave me hope, but her words… I had to admit that made me feel lower than low.
“What do you mean by that?” Jackson asked. “And make sure you’re real clear or we might have a misunderstanding.”
“Y’all are just so different,” Lily continued, her voice soft and caring. “The age difference, for one. And with a baby on the way… I hate to say it, but it might just be too much for someone your age to handle. I mean, is it even your kid? Everyone knows she was all over Carter.”
“Are you serious right now?” Jackson’s tone was incredulous. “How the hell could you say something like that? What did Mia ever do to you? You say you’re only concerned, but it doesn’t come across that way, Lily.”
“Look, I’m just saying what everyone else is thinking,” Lily insisted, giving his arm a comforting squeeze. “I want you to be happy, Jackson. But maybe happiness doesn’t have to look like this.”
As the conversation unfolded, my insecurities began to fester like an untreated wound. I couldn’t help but wonder if there was some truth to what Lily was saying. Was I really what Jackson needed? Was it possible I was making him miserable?
My heart felt heavy with doubt and fear. I hurried back to our room, and when he returned, I wasn’t sure how to act around him. I’d heard something I shouldn’t have. Now I wasn’t sure what to do. My emotional withdrawal did not go unnoticed by Jackson. His usually bright eyes clouded with confusion as I averted my gaze when he entered the room.
“Hey, is everything okay?” he asked softly, reaching out to touch my arm.
“Fine,” I muttered, barely able to look him in the eye. “Just tired.”
“Are you sure?” he pressed, concern etched into his handsome features.
“I’m fine,” I repeated, more forcefully this time. We both knew it was a lie, but I hoped he’d ignore it and leave things as they were. I didn’t deserve to be happy by his side. And I was too much of a coward to tell him I’d just heard everything said between him and Lily.
Jackson reached out and cupped my cheek with his rough palm. “I don’t believe you. Mia, we can’t have a happy future if we aren’t honest with each other. I genuinely care for you, and I hope you know that.”
I swallowed hard. He really was such an amazing guy. “I care about you too.”
It was the closest I could get to admitting my true feelings. I hoped one day, if I was still by his side, I’d be able to tell him I’d fallen for him. Although, there were times I couldn’t even admit it to myself.
He leaned down and pressed his forehead to mine. “Don’t let them get to you, darlin’. Their opinions don’t matter. Only mine and yours do.”
I smiled at him, feeling warm inside.
* * *
Four days later, we were still at the motel, and thankfully, so was my friend Bella. We’d quickly become friends after meeting at two different rodeos. Now we hung out whenever we ran into each other. I was so glad she’d ended up going to this particular rodeo. Even though she was closer to Jackson’s age, we got along pretty well. She didn’t treat me like a child, which I appreciated.
“Jackson’s amazing, but I can’t help but feel like I’m holding him back,” I admitted, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. “He deserves so much better than me, Bella. You should see the women who flirt with him. I’m nothing compared to them. And if it weren’t for me and the baby, he’d probably not have even thought about quitting the rodeo. I can’t help but feel like it’s all because of me.”
I hadn’t told anyone about my past. Not Jackson. Not Bella. They had no idea what sort of trash I came from. I worried how they’d see me if they knew. Although, there were times I thought Jackson might suspect. Maybe not everything, but enough to know I came from a very poor family.
“Hey now,” she said, taking my hand in hers and giving it a reassuring squeeze. “You are more than enough for him. Don’t let anyone else’s opinions or insecurities make you question what the two of you have together. He married you, didn’t he? And I’ve seen the way he watches you, how he can’t keep his hands off you.”
I wanted to believe her words, but the seeds of doubt had already taken root. And as they grew, our relationship began to crack under the weight of my silent uncertainty. I’d felt a coldness between the two of us the last few days.
“What do I do?” I asked. “I told you about my relationship with Carter. That’s all the experience I really have. It wasn’t like I had boyfriends before him. I’m not sure it counts.”
“Well, I have to agree that what you had with Carter couldn’t be considered an actual relationship. You were aware he was sleeping with other women, right?”
I nodded. Once Jackson had found out, he’d taken me to a clinic to get tested. Thankfully, I hadn’t caught anything from Carter -- except a baby. He’d even asked them to confirm the pregnancy.
“I wasn’t at the time, though. I found out later.” I put my head in my hands and sighed. “What should I do, Bella?”
“Be honest with him?” She patted my shoulder. “Look, you’re both adults. You’re married and have a baby on the way. If you can’t talk about this now, it’s only going to get worse. The number one thing that can make a marriage, or any relationship work, is communication.”
“But it’s so hard,” I muttered.
“I say this with love, Mia, but if you’re grown up enough to have sex, get married, and have a baby, then you’re enough of an adult to talk about your problems and fears with your husband.”
I knew she was right, but it didn’t make it any easier. Right now, Jackson was over at the fairgrounds helping out with the horses they’d brought in for the kids to ride. It wasn’t far from the diner where I’d met Bella, so I decided to head over and see if I could find my courage.
I saw him standing near a corral, three horses trotting around inside. The smile on his face made my knees weak. He really was a beautiful man, and he looked genuinely happy right now. Before I could convince myself to wait, or put it off indefinitely, I called out to him.
“Jackson!” He turned toward me, and I waved at him, moving closer.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked softly, his hand reaching out to touch mine. “You look stressed.”
“Can we talk?” The words came out more strained than I intended, but there was no turning back now.
“Of course,” he replied, guiding me to a quieter spot near the picnic tables. “What’s on your mind?”
I took a deep breath, steeling myself for what I needed to say. “I’ve been hearing some things, Jackson. From Anna and Lily. They’re saying you don’t really want to be with me… that I’m holding you back.”
His face darkened, anger flashing momentarily before he collected himself. “Mia, listen to me, I’m committed to you and this baby. None of those rumors are true. I don’t know why they’re doing this, but don’t let their lies come between us.”
“So, there’s nothing going on?” I asked.
“No. Even before we got married, I’d never slept with either of them. Easy women like them don’t really do it for me.”
I felt the blood drain from my face. Right. I really didn’t need to tell him anything about my past. Carter hadn’t been my first. Not by a long shot. The first time I’d had sex was when I was fifteen. I’d been the class whore, sleeping my way through all the boys who’d look my way. Would he be disgusted if he found out? I hadn’t dated them. Never had a boyfriend before Carter, and looking back, I wasn’t sure I could even call him that.
I forced a smile. “Okay, I trust you.”
“Good,” he murmured, pulling me into a tight embrace. “Just ignore them, and they’ll give up. I promise I haven’t encouraged them.”
I left him to his work and went back to the motel, but the whispers along the way made me want to run as far away as I could get.
“Did you hear?” a male voice whispered as I walked by. “Apparently, Jackson’s only with her because he feels obligated. Poor guy.”
“Such a shame,” another chimed in. “He had so much potential, before her.”
Their words stung like salt in an open wound, and my heart ached with each vicious remark I heard. From the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Anna and Lily. The smirks on their faces told me they were proud of the chaos they’d caused. I didn’t understand why they were doing this to me. What had I ever done to them?
Jackson said he’d stop going to rodeos. It didn’t seem right. Maybe those women were on to something. Would he have given it up if it weren’t for me? I doubted it. He clearly loved it.
As if suspended in a nightmare, I watched Jackson walk toward Anna and Lily with a determined stride. Had he heard what everyone was saying? Was he going to confront them? My heart pounded in my chest, fearing what might happen next.
“Anna, Lily,” Jackson said, his voice firm but calm. “We need to talk.”
I could see the surprise on their faces, but they quickly masked their emotions and feigned innocence.
“Talk about what, Jackson?” Anna asked sweetly. Did she really think he was going to believe her little act? The look in his eyes clearly said he was done with her antics.
“About the rumors you’ve been spreading about me and Mia,” he replied.
“Us? Spreading rumors?” Lily gasped dramatically, placing a hand on her chest. “Why would we ever do that? We care about you so much, Jackson. You know that, right?”
My fists clenched at my sides, wanting nothing more than to storm over there and call them out on their lies. But I held back, watching as Jackson tried to mediate the situation without escalating it further.
“Look, I don’t know what your problem is with Mia, but whatever it is, it needs to stop. Now.” Jackson’s expression hardened, frustration clear in his eyes. “She’s my wife, and you will show her the respect she deserves.”
“Jackson, we were just looking out for you,” Anna insisted, reaching out to touch his arm. “We’re your friends. We care about you.”
“Friends don’t sabotage each other’s relationships,” he countered, shaking off her touch. “Now, I’m asking you both, to stop this. I’d tried to be friends with you, but it was clear that wasn’t enough. I need you to leave me, and my wife, alone.”
“Fine. If it means that much to you, we’ll stop,” Lily agreed reluctantly, though I knew better than to trust her words.
With a final warning glance, Jackson turned away from them and headed toward me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that his efforts had only added fuel to the fire, stirring up more trouble than he’d resolved. They didn’t seem like the type of women to back down when they wanted something… and it was clear they wanted Jackson.
“Why did you do that?” I asked quietly as Jackson approached me, my eyes never leaving Anna and Lily’s retreating forms.
“I think they got the message,” he replied, trying to sound reassuring. “I couldn’t let them do that to you, Mia. You’re my wife, and it’s my job to protect you.”
The sincerity in his words was comforting, but I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that their interference was far from over. Were we destined to keep trading one problem for another? First Carter, now those women. Would someone else try to ruin the life we were trying to build together?
Or worse, would our pasts come back to haunt us? There was still so much I hadn’t told him. Things I hoped he never discovered.
What would he think if he learned about my dirty past? Or about my parents? If he no longer looked at me with such a warm look in his eyes, or touched me gently, it would probably break me. Being with Jackson was unlike anything I’d felt before. Kissing him made my toes curl, and the feel of his hand in mine always made me remember the way those rough palms felt running over my skin. Even now my pulse quickened at the memories of being with him. I had to wonder if I’d met him before Carter, would I have chased after him instead? Everything about him turned me on, and he had the best smile ever. I couldn’t think of a single thing I didn’t like about Jackson.
With these thoughts swirling in my head, I held on tighter to Jackson. I’d already started falling for him. If anything happened to tear us apart, I wasn’t sure I’d survive it. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me.