12 Saleuk
The moment I heard sound, I knew I was waking up. I let the noises sink in for a bit. The drip of water on stone made a soft rhythm, echoing off someplace enclosed. Then I heard the smooth hum of a breeze through a narrow opening. It was all very soothing except that the last thing I remembered was the look of panic on Sam’s face.
Sam.
I peeled my eyes open to see a cracked stone roof above me with plant roots webbing out like sutures to stitch the fissures back together. Beams of orange light bled into a shaded enclosure with four walls and a space where a door would have been had it still been intact. I was lying on the hard ground with a thin layer of spongy moss against my back and my pack under my head.
My limbs were stiff, but not so stiff to be useless. I pushed myself up on my hands and looked around to find Sam’s pack sitting against the old metal frame of a sleeping pod. On the sleeping pod was the symbol for Sylos Orimos, the research company that built the base on Phesah in the first place.
So we were at the research compound. Or, we were in the ruins of it anyway.
I listened for Sam’s presence as I lurched to my feet. A lingering pain pulled at my hip as I stood. Looking down, I saw two layers of white bandaging wrapped around my midsection. Lifting it, I saw a large black leaf pressed against my skin. Under that was a layer of damp mud over where the kilor had managed to stick its little hairs in me. The punctures themselves looked dried out. There was no bleeding or oozing or swelling.
Soft footsteps approached the opening into the building and when I looked up, there she was, staggering through the doorway with a certain slouch to her shoulders like she was barely awake. She had a jar in her hand filled with red seeds, but when she saw me, her tired eyes lit up.
“Saleuk,” she exhaled, stumbling toward me.
I rushed forward, putting my hands on her arms to steady her.
“Sam?” I said, concerned.
“I’m just tired. But you’re awake. Thank God.”
I smelled blood and it wasn’t mine. I searched her body to find her hand wrapped in layers of bandages, but that didn’t stop the red from soaking through. I lifted her hand in front of me, turning it over.
“What’s this?”
“One of those fucking bugs jabbed me with his little pokey thing.”
“Bugs?”
“Yeah. There were tons of them. That’s why I brought you here instead of staying on the bank.”
“You brought me here? Sam, I’m more than twice your size. How’d you bring me anywhere?”
“Used the water.” She gestured with her hand in a weird, wavey motion. “We just sort of drifted along. But, um… I’m so tired now. I got these.” She showed me her jar of seeds. “You guys use them for medical stuff. I was thinking it might help with whatever it is I’m feeling.”
“What are you feeling?”
“Out of breath,” she shrugged. “Dehydrated. Cold. All the things.”
“That’s because you probably got stung by a nuk nah.”
“A nuka what?”
“A nuk nah.”
“Am I dying? Is a nick nack bad?”
“No, but their venom keeps your blood from coagulating for a while.”
“Shit, why is every creature here so pokey and poisonous?”
“Venomous.”
“Whatever. Oh! Except for that big monkey giraffe thing.”
“The what?”
“It was tall with a long face and it walked on its knuckles.”
“A kri’kal tal?”
“I don’t know what the words are that you say, Saleuk. It was a big thing with big eyes and it climbed a tree.”
I chuckled at her. The way she spoke so freely was something that hadn’t changed in the time we’d been apart and after seeing her behavior with the researcher, I thought she might have lost that fire. I was glad to see she hadn’t.
I led her over to a slab of stone that was probably once a shiny bench and sat her down. Sitting beside her, I unwrapped her tight bindings to look at the wound on the top of her hand. It was smeared with blood, but no longer bleeding, thank the stars. As pale as she looked, she probably didn’t have much more blood to give.”
“This works on smaller animals to make them bleed out so the nuk nah can feed, but thankfully, you’re not a smaller animal and you’re not bleeding anymore.”
“Oh good. Should I eat these?” she asked, holding up her seeds.
I snatched them away. “No. Unless they’re processed right, they’ll give you a high you probably wouldn’t enjoy. What you need is food and water and rest.”
“I have protein bars. But I’m out of water.”
I nodded. “I’ll get you some. Lay down.”
“But shouldn’t I help—”
I stood and gently pushed her down on the bench, lifting her pack to use as a pillow.
“Rest, Sam. I promise I will be back.”
Groaning, she curled up on her side and shoved her hands between her knees as if to keep them warm. I shrugged my jacket off my shoulders and draped it over her body. On me, zipped up entirely, it was skin tight. On her, it was practically a small blanket. It nearly covered her whole length and with my residual heat still inside the lining, she moaned with comfort.
That sound went straight through me and I stepped back, cocking my head.
“Uh, you just relax,” I said, heading for the door.
Taking a canteen from my bag, I stepped out to retrieve some water. The streams were filtered and fresh, but as an extra precaution, I put a couple drops of purifier into the canteen and let it sit while I ventured further out to look for something in particular. A fruit. One Sam had eaten before when she was with us on Sylos. Maybe being more familiar with the food would help her state of mind.
Kalaha grew on thin trees and hung like little green ornaments from the thinnest branches. It was a treat for small animals, but the twig-like trees didn’t support the weight of larger creatures. I had to hike out a bit to find some, but when I did, I was relieved. I came upon a tree full of ripe green teardrops, but I first skimmed the ground for fallen ones. If they weren’t bug-eaten, they’d be the ripest. I found three in the grass and plucked a couple more from the trees just in case, rinsing them thoroughly in the water before heading back.
Inside the little stone building, I found Sam shivering under my jacket. I knelt in front of her with the canteen and the fruit in my hands.
“Sam,” I whispered, setting the canteen down so I could slide my hand under her head.
Her cheek was cool and clammy and at the sound of my voice, her eyes only fluttered.
“Sam,” I said again.
“Hmm,” she hummed.
“Wake up and eat.”
Her big eyes slowly opened, showing me a glimpse of rich, earthy brown with specks of fruit green, a detail I’d never seen before. She stared at me for a long second before blinking to full awareness and slowly sitting up. I opened my hand to show her the fruit.
“You know these. You ate them on Sylos.”
She nodded and took one in between her fingers, raising it to her lips. It was small enough to pop the whole thing in her mouth, but she took a bite instead. The moment her teeth broke the skin, sweet juice rolled down her chin. I watched her chew slowly and then sigh with relief like I’d just applied balm to a burn. After eating the rest of it, she took another. I couldn’t stop staring at her lips. I had to force myself to look away and put the canteen on the bench beside her.
“Drink. The water’s clean.”
“Thanks.”
She flipped the cap off the canteen and took a few swigs. My eyes escaped me again and I couldn’t help watching the way her throat bobbed with each sip.
What was wrong with me? She was frail and weak and there was no worse time to suddenly start noticing those things about her.
Wiping her lips with the back of her wrist, Sam capped the canteen and set it aside, suddenly realizing the jacket I’d draped over her.
“Oh,” she said, noticing next that I hadn’t put the top of my suit back on.
It would have been more comfortable to do so since it had temperature regulators built in and the humidity wasn’t very pleasant, but I had intended to wash off the wound she’d dressed. Sam took the jacket off and held it out to me.
“You must be cold. Take it back.”
“Keep it,” I said. “It’s not cold. Only you are cold because of blood loss. Eat the rest of the fruit. They’re high in sugar. You need the energy.”
I swiped the dial on my thermo-suit’s hub and the material quickly reformed to the top half of my body, covering my bare skin down to my wrists. I could have covered my hands, too, but I wanted them free to measure Sam’s temperature.
Of course, Ilisa gave me medical supplies. There was probably a proper scanner in in that would have been much more efficient than my hand.
Sam slowly slid her hands into the oversized jacket and then drew her knees up to her chest. Her skin was ashen and her lips looked dry and those damn shadows under her eyes were only getting worse.
“Have you slept before just now?”
She shook her head. “This place is too scary to sleep.”
“You should sleep. I will watch over you.”
She smiled weakly, shaking her head. “So you’re stuck taking care of me because I’m sick again. Is that why you don’t like me?”
“You’re not sick. You just need rest.” I stopped for a moment, rubbing my forehead. “And I like you just fine. Now lay down and go to sleep.”
“Where will you be?”
“Here.”
Her eyes were practically closed already when she reached out and gripped my hand with the tips of her fingers. I stepped closer to her and she only adjusted her grip so she was holding onto me. Then she curled onto her side, nuzzling her head against her pack again, and closed her eyes.
“Promise,” she mumbled.
I crouched down in front of her and when I did, she just hugged my hand to her chest and tucked it under her chin. I watched her body go still. I watched every muscle sag and relax and felt her hand gradually release mine. It would have been easy to free myself from her, but I got distracted. Distracted by the fullness of her lips. The way her pulse thrummed against my knuckles. The scent of her was potent in that place, even amongst the smells of the wilderness.
I couldn’t take my hand away. I couldn’t leave her side. Not yet. I just watched her, somehow flattered at how she closed her eyes and surrendered to a deep slumber so easily with me there. It meant she felt secure with me and that fed my ego in a way I didn’t think I needed.
Either that or she was so exhausted she literally passed out. I wanted to think it was the prior, though, because suddenly I imagined I would do anything for her. For all the griping and complaining and arguing we had done before, the woman in front of me was so much the same and yet different and I admired it. I wanted to protect her. I’d wanted to protect her back then, too, but she was so good at pushing me away. I wanted to wrap her in my arms and make sure she got whatever she needed. I wanted to…
A painful pressure in my chest made me wince. With a hiss, I drew back my hand and pressed it to my chest.
“Sjek,” I swore under my breath. It was like someone had hit me with a hammer and knocked the wind out of me.
I stood, pacing to the opposite side of the room. Bracing one hand on the wall, I took long, steady breaths and rolled my shoulders a couple of times to relieve some strange amount of pressure behind my ribs. When I was able to stand up straight again, I felt that my heart was beating in an irregular rhythm and worried I might be having some sort of delayed reaction to the kilor quills.
Until it hit me.
I paused, focusing on my breathing again only to discern two different heartbeats working in tandem with each other. Two of them.
I hadn’t felt my paetal since before I went into stasis. Its awakening was jarring and painful, but I was overjoyed to know it could still function. That it was not just some useless organ that would never work again. But Vahko had proven that a valerian’s dormant paetal could start beating again, even after the Thinning, and mine had done just that.
I slowly turned back around and looked at Sam sleeping so soundly on that bench all curled up in my jacket. It wasn’t as if we hadn’t spent many days with each other before. Why hadn’t my paetal responded then? Why hadn’t I felt a surge before? It made no sense.
And then I considered how out of sorts she was. How ill she’d become and how stressed she was. All those things combined could create an environment that wasn’t fitting for any biological reaction to happen.
At least, that was my theory because I had no other ideas as to why I didn’t surge with her before.
There was even a part of me that had wanted to the first time I saw her…
My heart thumped hard against my sternum, filling my skin with heat. It had been a long time since I’d felt my need overtake me. The only way for men to get any sort of relief since the Thinning was with artificial means and they were tedious. My own hand sufficed from time to time, but the drive to even do that was not very urgent. Now, with my paetal reminding me it existed, years of neglect suddenly seemed to catch up to me.
I turned and left the building, in need of some fresh air where Sam’s scent wasn’t flooding my nostrils. I stood against the outer wall of the building, basking in the way my skin was burning with excitement. Arousal. Need. Every bit of it went straight to my cock, which was straining against my suit.
I swore at the whole situation, needing relief. But I wouldn’t dream of even mentioning the prospect to Sam. Alien things already made her uncomfortable. If I told her my body wanted me to mate with her on top of it, she might eject herself into space. Judging by the way she acted toward me before, the last thing she saw when she looked at me was attraction.
I couldn’t go back in there with an erection trying to tear through my suit.
Groaning, I turned around to face the wall and braced one hand against it.
Stars above, the universe chose a great time for me to surge. With Sam half dead inside and me recovering from kilor venom, it was perfect.
I rolled my eyes and slid my other hand down past the belt of my pants. I felt for my cock and I hissed when my hand found it. It was already so sensitive and hard it almost hurt to fist it. But I needed relief. The whole thing came on so suddenly, I felt like I was unraveling from the tension.
I bit back a moan as I pulled my cock out to stroke it. One pump and I was trembling. Two pumps and Sam’s scent somehow drifted out into the warm air and surrounded me. I groaned softly and started to work myself, closing my eyes only to find Sam there in my waking dreams. Small. Feminine. Soft. I bit my lip, imagining it was hers.
The tension built until I was choking on another moan, forcing myself to completion just to relieve the pressure.
“Sam?” I rasped, feeling a wave of release explode through my core. “Really?”
I pumped myself vigorously, my head falling back as I imagined how tight Sam’s body would squeeze me if I were inside her. It was torture. Sweet, insane torture. Her cries of ecstasy were a dream and the idea of her shaking around me as she rode out her own orgasm made me come so hard I nearly shouted.
But I didn’t. I swallowed the sounds of my release and then pressed my head to the rough stone wall. My cock was still hard, but at least I’d taken the edge off. I slammed my fist against the stone and huffed my frustration.
I’d wanted to surge for so long. I’d wanted a woman to protect. To bed. To love. But I was at a loss when it finally happened.