6. Margot
SIX
Margot
PRESENT TIME
“Margot, come on. Let’s get you up. I think your knee is bleeding,” Josie instructed as she tried to tug me to my feet.
“My knee is always bleeding,” I muttered, dragging myself to standing. That was something about the marina I had gotten used to. I tended to cut myself whenever I wasn’t paying attention. There were too many hazards. Broken boards. Slippery steps. Rusted doors. Uneven gravel. For someone as uncoordinated and as clumsy as me, it was a constant effort not to hurt myself every day.
The screened door closed with a heavy thwack, and Josie followed me to the kitchen. I was dazed and unsure of how I moved my feet. It felt like more of a shuffle.
“We don’t know anything,” she reported with a quiet voice. “I wish I could have said that before you even opened the door. Maybe I should have texted you first, so you wouldn’t panic.”
I looked at her. “What do you know?” I hadn’t pieced together how or why she was here, only that her presence meant something terrible had happened to Caleb. I felt it, and that was all I needed to know.
She moved the envelope aside, Dean had left on the counter, and sat at the bar. “I was at my parents’ house. They live next to the O’Connors,” she explained. “I saw one of the Coast Guard trucks pull into their driveway. Lights flashing. The whole thing. Mom and Dad did, too. We headed outside to see what was going on.”
My stomach lurched to my throat. I had to grab the counter to keep myself from throwing up.
“And?” I barely whispered.
“Listen to me, Margot. We don’t know anything. Okay? But this is what he said.” She kept an unwavering lock on my eyes as if she worried I’d pitch over at any second.
I wasn’t going to pretend like any of this was okay or that I was in good shape. I wanted information.
Josie continued, “Caleb and Gabe were on patrol together. Someone called in a distress signal on a boat a few miles out. Neither one came back. The Cutter appears to be abandoned.”
If I weren’t holding on with such force, I would have slid to the floor in another puddle.
“What do I do?” I glanced at her. Something inside me shifted. There were no tears. Everything felt empty and cold. “What do I do?” I repeated.
“Do about what?” the deep voice came from over my shoulder.
Shit. I had forgotten Ethan was here.
He strolled into the kitchen. “What’s going on?” he asked.
“Margot, who is this?” Josie pointed at Ethan. She stared at him.
I sighed. “Josie, Ethan. Ethan, Josie. He’s my… ex,” I admitted. There was no reason to lie to her. “He was just headed back to New York. He’s been here on a vacation, I guess.”
“What happened to your knee?” Ethan bent down to scan the blood dripping to my ankle.
“It looks worse than it is.” I was irritated that we were off track. I needed Josie to tell me what was being done to find Caleb.
Ethan grabbed a paper towel and wet it under the faucet, pressed it to my knee, and held it steady.
“Josie, tell me what else did the officer say?” I begged.
She leaned over the counter and glanced at Ethan, tending to my knee. She shook her head as her eyes traveled back up to meet mine. “I thought you should know there is a search crew looking for him. Everyone is out. The whole squad.”
“Shit. He’s missing?” Ethan mumbled. “Caleb?”
I spun around, nearly knocking Ethan on his butt, and grabbed my wallet and keys from the kitchen desk. “Okay, then let’s go. I want to be there when he gets back.”
“Hey, you’re still bleeding,” Ethan announced.
“Whoa. Whoa.” Josie put her hands in the air. “I thought I’d wait here with you in case there is any news. We can’t get on base. I came over for support. So you aren’t alone.” She glared at Ethan. It felt like a warning shot in his direction.
“Someone can get us on base. And you know everyone on this damn island,” I argued. “We aren’t going to sit here.”
She blinked. “They aren’t going to let you anywhere near a rescue mission. Or me, for that matter, no matter who I know. We have no IDs and definitely no military clearance.”
I let out a ragged breath. “Then I’ll wait at the gate until someone lets me in.”
Josie shook her head. “I don’t think that’s a great idea either. How about I find some food? We can wait here. I told Jacob to text me as soon as he has news. No matter what it is.”
“No matter what?” I glared at her. “You mean if he’s d-dead? Is that what you’re trying to say?”
She didn’t answer.
“Fuck,” Ethan whispered.
I shouted at her. “Is that why you’re here? They think he’s already dead!”
Ethan jumped between us. It was a shock that he was here. Even more of a shock that he was intervening.
“Listen to her, Margot,” he pleaded. “She sounds like she knows what she’s talking about. Stay here and wait it out like she said.”
I glared at him. “You don’t even like Caleb,” I snarled. “Why do you care? Why would I take your advice?”
I barreled past them, headed toward the door.
“Margot! Wait.”
I was in the gravel driveway, hopping behind the wheel of my car. I didn’t care what the US Coast Guard said. I was going to be there when he got back. I would be there even if no one else were.
Josie’s hands landed on the passenger side door and yanked it open. She ducked her head inside. “At least let me drive.”
I considered it and then made an awkward climb across the console. Ethan tapped on the passenger side window.
“Should I stay here?” he asked. “You know in case… I don’t know. But would that help you?”
Help me. Ethan wanted to help. I couldn’t wrap my head around anything right now.
Josie nodded. “Yes. Thank you, Ethan. That would be great. Stay here and just stay. For now.”
“I will. Margot has my number if I can do something else.” He opened the door, letting muggy air into the car. “I hope they find him and he’s okay.” He pressed his thumb to my cheek, something he used to do before he left for work. I couldn’t look at him. He shut the door and stood back from the car.
I strapped on my seatbelt. “Hurry.” Was all I said.
Josie led us out of the marina drive and onto the main road on Marshoak Island.
“What else do you know?” I questioned. “How was there an accident? The weather is perfect.”
I thought about all the rescues Caleb had told me about. They always involved storms, nor’easters, and epic flooding. Boats trapped out on the ocean at night during high winds. Today had been beautiful. This morning I had finally spoken to John, the fisherman who knew my Uncle Walt. I had sipped coffee and tried to cast a line past the pelican on a nearby pier. The surface was so calm I could count the ripples the hook made when it hit the water. How did Caleb, the most elite swimmer in his squad, go missing on a perfect day?
Josie slowed as we neared some of the island shops. The speed limit took a quick dive to twenty-five in the most congested part of the island.
“Not much more than they have all boats on patrol looking for Caleb and Gabe. They responded to a call. Reported in. They haven’t been heard from since. That’s when someone at the base rode out to see the O’Connors. I don’t know if that’s standard or because Caleb’s dad was stationed there for so long.”
I tried to absorb the information and think through the possibilities. He was an excellent swimmer. Top of his class. He couldn’t have had an accident in the water. It wasn’t possible. No matter what I told myself, I felt the dread coat the underside of my skin.
“What did his dad say? What was his reaction?” I asked.
Josie took a left on the beach road that led to the Coast Guard base.
“I think he was trying to keep it together for Stella’s sake. Jacob saw me standing there, and we decided I should head to the Blue Heron to tell you what was going on. Why do you want to know about Adam?”
“Because, if he thought his son was in danger, he would react differently.”
“True.” She pressed her lips together.
“So, was he acting like this was serious?” I pushed her for more details.
Josie hesitated. “He acted like he couldn’t sit still. He got his truck and followed the officer back to base.” Before I could say anything, she interrupted, “But he has clearance and can still get on base.”
“Thank you for telling me the truth.” If Caleb’s dad was on the base, then it was bad. It meant I needed to be there too. There was nothing I could do at the Blue Heron, except worry in silence. Apparently, now Ethan was there to worry instead of me. I didn’t like the idea of him at the cottage, but he seemed like he had a genuine interest in helping.
Josie veered the car toward the main gate. The crossbars were down, and one of the guards walked toward the open window of the driver’s side.
“ID?” he asked.
She shook her head. “Hi, Charlie. It’s me. Josie?”
He ducked lower to peer inside the car. “Oh, hey, Josie. Couldn’t see you inside the car. What are you doing here?”
“Well, I brought Caleb O’Connor’s girlfriend. She knows he and Gabe are missing. Can we wait here for him to get back?”
He shuffled back and forth on his feet. “Josie, I can’t let you in without a pass. You probably know that, though.”
I lunged across the car, grabbing the steering wheel. “Please. I’ll go anywhere you ask. I’ll sit at the docks. I’ll wait in his room. Please. I can’t stay home if he’s out there.”
Josie tried to push me back into the seat. “Shh. Let me talk to Charlie, okay? I’ve got this.”
Charlie stared at us. “I’m real sorry, Josie. I can’t let you on base. It’s the law. I can’t break the law even if it’s for you.”
“It’s for me,” I screeched. “And Caleb. I need to be here when he gets back.”
He twisted his lips to one side and then the other. “I get it. I do, but it’s a military law. I can’t let a car on base.”
Josie threw the car into park. “Can we talk for a second, Charlie? Just us?” She opened the door, and I saw him step aside and allow her enough space to exit. What the hell was she doing?
I needed to get through the gates. The only thing keeping me from being where Caleb needed me to be was Charlie.
Josie started to ask him about whom he could call at command. They went back and forth. She pivoted and he turned. Now, his back was to the car, and I had a chance.
I stepped one foot out of the car and then another. Then I made a run for it.
“Margot, no!”