54. TESSA
TESSA
“This is a terrible idea.” My steps dragged against the sidewalk as we approached my front porch. “I still don’t see the point.”
“We’ve been over this,” Blake’s voice carried that infuriatingly calm doctor-knows-best tone that made me want to simultaneously strangle him and kiss him.
“Even on the one in a million chance you’re correct …” I shot him a look when he dramatically clutched his chest at my lack of faith. “There’s no way we’re going to find it.”
“Stop. Your confidence is making my ego too big.”
“We’re not drug-sniffing dogs. This is pointless, and I’m worried.”
For the first time since this wild theory of his took root, Blake’s spine stiffened. Something dark flashed across his eyes, and I watched his unwavering certainty crack, just for a moment.
“You should wait outside,” he declared, placing his hand over mine on the doorknob.
“And leave you alone in my townhouse? I think not.”
He smirked, but there was steel beneath the playfulness.
“I’m not worried about me. I’m worried about you. If there’s even a chance that what you’re saying is right and you stumble across it, you could get sick. You’re a doctor; you can’t afford to get sick.”
“Let me get this straight.” Blake stepped closer, his presence making the air feel suddenly warmer.
His fingers brushed against my cheek, sweeping away a fallen strand of hair.
“Faced with the very real possibility that someone has been poisoning you, your primary concern right now is that I could find it and get sick?”
“You find that amusing?”
Blake shook his head, something soft and wondering crossing his face. “If kindness was a disease, yours would be so extreme that it’d be fatal.”
“I disagree. Don’t you remember my grade-A bitch phase when I was mad at you?”
The lock clicked open beneath my fingers, the door creaking on its hinges.
“Tessa?”
My stomach dropped. No. Not him, not now. Not when Blake was on high alert, convinced someone was trying to murder me, for crying out loud.
Last night, Blake had made me go over everyone in my life like I was the star witness in some true crime documentary. He’d even brought out a pad of paper and created two columns, methodically listing everyone who might have even the smallest reason to dislike me.
That list included:
Eric Voss. Top of the list, obviously, what with his creepy-ass letters and prior violence.
Though how he’d get poison into my system was a mystery.
Blake sent the letters to some testing facility to see if they contained poison, but so far, they hadn’t come back.
And Blake hadn’t gotten sick after touching them. But I digress.
Once Upon a Lifetime, my business competitor. Though I’d pointed out that successful companies don’t usually resort to murder to eliminate tiny competitors. Blake had written it down anyway, his doctor’s scrawl matching his determined expression.
My neighbor, or “the creeper,” as Blake dubbed him, who apparently had means, access, and a “concerning fascination” with my comings and goings.
Sure, the guy was odd, but murder? No. I think not.
Eli, my ex-boyfriend. Blake pointed out that plenty of love stories end in death. #Romance. I’d reminded him Eli was more of a golden retriever puppy. The only pit bull in my life currently was Blake.
Scarlett, my best friend, whose name I’d scratched out so viciously that I’d torn through the page. Blake had the audacity to suggest that “deep-seated jealousy can hide in the most unexpected places.” I’d nearly thrown the notepad at his head.
And after all that speculation of who might be trying to kill me (assuming someone was trying, which was still a far-fetched if) now here was Eli, standing on my porch with a pink wedding planner I’d completely forgotten about, while Blake’s entire body tensed like a guard dog spotting an intruder.
“I thought that was you.” Eli smiled, but it faltered when he caught the look in Blake’s eyes.
“What are you doing here?” I tried for surprised rather than horrified, but given Blake’s current murder-mystery obsession, I might as well have invited a cobra to afternoon tea.
“You asked me to drop this off.” Eli held up the binder like a peace offering.
“Oh, right.” The binder, once my pride and joy, filled with wedding planning ideas. In the chaos of this moment, I’d forgotten I’d asked for it back days ago. Not that I’d point out he was late …
Blake shifted beside me, his shoulders tensing. “Interesting timing.”
“Blake,” I murmured, touching his arm.
“Just returning her things.” Eli’s casual tone had an edge to it now.
Blake’s eyebrow arched. “And you just happen to show up the first time she’s been home in days?”
“I didn’t realize I needed to clear my schedule with you.” Eli’s smile stayed fixed, but his knuckles whitened around the binder.
“Just seems like quite a coincidence.” Blake’s voice was deceptively calm. “You holding on to her things this long, showing up right when she returns …”
“What exactly are you implying?”
“I think you know exactly what I’m implying.”
“What the hell is your problem?” Eli snarled.
“An ex lingering outside her place? Ever look up the word stalker in a dictionary?”
“You think I’m stalking her? That’s rich.”
“If the shoe fits …”
“You pretentious piece of—” Eli’s hands balled into fists. “You’re lucky I don’t rearrange that face of yours.”
Blake’s laugh was cold. “I’d love to see you try.”
“Guys, stop.” I pressed my palm against Blake’s chest, but he was like granite under my hand.
“Maybe you’re the reason she’s been sick.” Blake’s accusation to Eli cut through the tension like a knife.
The words hung in the air for a moment before landing. Eli’s face transformed from anger to stunned disbelief.
“You think I poisoned her?” He stared at Blake with wide eyes. “What, are you out of your fucking mind?”
“Do you have access to poisons?” Blake’s voice was emotionless now, which somehow made it worse.
Eli’s eyes ping-ponged between us. “Poisoning you? Really?” The hurt in his voice slapped me across the face.
“He’s just trying to rule out all possibilities,” I explained. “That’s all.”
“That’s all, huh?” Eli’s laugh was bitter.
“Sounds to me like you’re stumped, Doctor.
You thought you were so smart, that after a year of other doctors failing to diagnose Tessa’s symptoms, you’d swoop in and figure it out in no time.
And when that didn’t work, you couldn’t admit that you’re not smarter than all those other doctors.
So, you had to concoct some other explanation to keep her hooked and relying on you to figure this out for her.
How convenient that your explanation drives a wedge between her and everyone else she trusts. ”
“Eli!” I chided.
“No, Tessa, you need to hear this. If you ask me? There’s only one person in your life that’s toxic. This guy.” Eli turned to me, his eyes soft with hurt. “After all we’ve been through, I can’t believe you would even think I would do that to you.”
Shame burned my cheeks.
“I was the one encouraging you to pursue a diagnosis when you wanted to give up,” he continued.
“I was the one who would drive you to your appointments and take off work. At the risk of sounding like a jerk, your illness negatively affected my life and our relationship. So, what exactly would I have gained, Tessa?”
He was right. It made no sense.
Plus, if he really wanted me dead, I’d be dead by now.
“Eli …”
“Goodbye, Tessa.”
The pink binder hit the porch with a hollow thud, and Eli stormed off. His car door slammed, tires screaming against pavement as he peeled away.
“He’s right,” I whispered, the words tasting like defeat. “Looking at everyone in my life like a suspect is unhealthy, Blake.”
“Tessa …”
“Look, my relationship with Eli didn’t work out. Part of that was because he was encouraging me to figure out what was making me sick. In your theory, that would’ve put him in jail, so it doesn’t make sense. Even though Eli and I broke up, we were on good terms. Were being the operative word.”
“I’m sure he’ll come back.”
“It’s not just him. I won’t let this happen to everyone else in my life. There is no coming back from accusing someone of trying to murder you, Blake.” My voice cracked. “If I were Eli, I would never want to talk to me again either. I’m ashamed of myself for entertaining this idea.”
“Tessa …”
I spun around, anger and hurt making me bold. “You will not confront anyone else in my life with this accusation, do you hear me?”
“And what if I’m right?”
I paused. “In the unimaginably, unlikely event that some kind of toxin is found in my veins, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.
But you’re a doctor. You know as well as I do that doesn’t necessarily mean someone in my life is poisoning me.
There are outbreaks all the time at food processing plants or supplement companies.
Think about all the areas within the supply chain where something we ingest or come into contact with can be inadvertently contaminated.
Groundwater, medicine, food, supplements, cosmetics.
You name it. So, keep that in mind because we are not speaking this thought aloud again, do you hear me? ”
“What are you doing?” Blake asked, his attention fixed on my hand as I locked my front door.
“After careful consideration, this wild goose chase of visually inspecting my place for possible poison is fruitless and dangerous. We both have busy days ahead of us.”
Blake’s chest puffed up, squaring his shoulders like he was facing down a difficult patient as he glanced at my front door.
I could read the proposal forming on his face—that he would go inside alone, play detective in my townhouse.
But he was an emergency room doctor, for crying out loud, not a poison control expert or a drug-sniffing canine.
What did he realistically think he would find?
Nothing. That was the problem.
Blake’s anxiety over my illness was unraveling into irrational thoughts and wild theories. Again. For that reason alone, I prayed the latest round of testing would reveal an answer.
We walked back toward the car in silence.
“I know you mean well.” I softened my tone, watching his shoulders slowly unknot.
Blake grabbed the back of his neck, looking uncertain. “I do, but you’re right. I’m sorry. The last thing I want to do is sabotage your life, Cupcake.”
A smile crept across my face, and just like that, my anger toward Blake melted away like morning frost. I wrapped my hands around his neck, reminding myself that Blake was, well, less than seasoned when it came to relationships.
He was my pit bull, barking and snapping at the fingers of anyone he perceived as a threat.
I reached up on tiptoe and planted my lips to his, getting lost in the kiss as his mouth opened, my fingers exploring his back while his found my hair. The world narrowed to just us, just this moment?—
“What the fuck?”
A car door slammed like a gunshot, making me jump. We pulled apart and turned toward the sound, only to find my brother, Ryker, storming toward us, his face a thundercloud of rage.
Before I could even process what was happening, Ryker’s palms slammed against Blake’s chest, sending him wobbling backward.