64. BLAKE
BLAKE
SINNERS & SAINTS GROUP CHAT
Axel: HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT
Axel: Our boy Blake is trending on Instagram???
Axel: Dr. Death actually owns a tux and knows how to smile???
Me: It’s called a wedding, jackass. Rich people post everything. You, of all people, know that.
Axel: I wasn’t invited to a wedding with hot, emotionally vulnerable women in formalwear??? This is a crime against humanity.
Axel: Wait.
Axel: IS THAT …
Jace: Tessa. On Blake’s arm.
Jace: Looking very … not sisterly.
Ryker: My sister’s catastrophic taste in men has finally reached apocalyptic proportions.
Axel: WHAT
Axel: THE
Axel: FUCK
Axel: So … that black eye makes a lot more sense now.
Ryker: He got lucky. I was distracted by the shock of finding out my best friend and my sister have been lying to my face.
Axel: That’s it? No murder? No grave? What happened to “touch my sister and die”?
Ryker: Tessa threatened to tell our mother about spring break, freshman year, if I interfered.
Axel: This is bullshit. I was promised violence. I had money on someone losing teeth.
Me: Your disappointment in the lack of bloodshed is genuinely concerning.
Axel: Says the guy who’s been secretly dating his best friend’s sister while treating patients. Very serial killer origin story of you.
Ryker: Don’t push it, Axel.
Axel: Or what? You’ll give him another chance to punch you? *eye roll emoji*
Jace: Are we just going to ignore that there’s apparently a spring break story that’s worse than Ryker’s sister dating his best friend?
Axel: Yeah, why don’t we remember that?
Ryker: You two were both blackout drunk that night, thus your convenient amnesia.
Axel: NEW MISSION ACQUIRED *target emoji*
Ryker: I will end you.
Me: Now who’s making death threats?
Ryker: Shut up, sister kisser.
Axel: Would this be a bad time to mention I finally got that rash to go away? Turns out, it wasn’t an STD!
Everyone: SHUT UP, AXEL.