Chapter Nineteen
Lorelei
T omorrow is the funeral, but today we have actual work to do.
We are on our way to meet with Matthew about the audit.
I’m not sure if he is done, but we are worried about him.
He had a meeting with Andrea this morning, but she hasn’t said anything.
We know there are things they can’t tell us, so we will try to be patient.
If he isn’t in jail, I assume he is innocent.
“Ready?” I ask Ross as he types on his phone.
“Uh… yeah. Ready. Sorry,” he says. He gets out with Cam and Remy and walks around to my door. They have a habit of this and I just let it happen. It makes us all feel better.
I get out and we all walk to the door. Right away, Ross is on edge when the door is open slightly. “Why is his office open?” I ask as I push the door open.
“Lori, wait,” Ross practically yells at me as he looks into the window. It’s too late though, as soon as I open the door, I can see straight into his office through the waiting room. The scream that comes out of me is shrill. I jump back and cover my mouth, not believing what I’m looking at.
“Dispatch, this is Detective Yotes. Send a unit to 15 th and Collier… Yes, notify the sergeant… Thanks,” Ross says into his phone. “Guys, back up.”
“What the fuck is happening?” I say as Remy hugs me tightly. Inside Matthew’s office, he is hanging by a rope. His eyes are practically popping out of his head, and it looks like he’s been there for a minute.
“I am going to clear the building, I need for you three to stay here. Okay? I mean it. Do not move,” Ross says.
“We are good,” Cam says as he hugs me next.
“He killed himself,” I say when Ross walks into the office.
“He felt guilty,” Cam says. “Sometimes people can’t see past the darkness.”
“Why didn’t he just ask for help?” I sniff.
“Sometimes people don’t want help,” Remy tells me as he rubs my back.
“Yeah, just him,” Ross sighs and pulls off his gloves.
“He leave a note?” Cam asks.
“Uh. Yeah. It’s on his desk. It just says, “I’m sorry, Beatris,” and his signature under it,” Ross tells us. “When units get here, we can go back to the office, if you want.”
“Yeah. We have some paperwork to do,” I say. “I need to get lost in that for a while.”
“We still have a surprise for you,” Remy says, kissing me.
I ’ve spent the afternoon doing paperwork.
Everyone has left me alone so I can focus.
When it hit five, Cam and Remy came into my office and took my laptop.
Now, we are pulling into the driveway and the guys are excited.
Why? I don’t know. I just want to take a scalding shower, but they won’t let me do that either.
“Do I need an escort, or can I get out?” I say with an attitude. When no one answers, I scoff and get out.
“Lori,” Cam says. I ignore him and go inside. I toss my bag on the couch.
“Hey,” Remy says, turning me around.
“What?” I snap.
“I’m going to pretend you aren’t being a brat,” he smirks.
“I don’t give a fuck what you do,” I say harshly. He nearly growls as he grabs me by the throat and pulls me close. I grin at him and Cam laughs.
“Lose the fucking attitude or the detectives are going to see you get bent over this goddamn counter,” Remy growls.
“I didn’t see anything,” Ross laughs.
“What is wrong?” Remy asks me.
“I’m just overwhelmed,” I sigh. “You won’t let me cook myself in the shower. Reading doesn’t help…”
“What about dancing,” he smiles. I gasp and throw my arms around his neck, and he laughs as he picks me up. He sits me on the counter and cups my face. “I told you I would, so I did. It’s an escape for you, and I don’t want you to feel trapped.”
“Dancing?” Ross asks. “Ohhhh…”
“Go get changed and we will take you down,” Cam says.
“Okay,” I say with a bright smile. I hop down and Ross still looks confused. “What?”
“Just confused,” he says.
“Pole dancing is more than just stripping,” Andrea laughs. “It’s hard.”
“How would you know?” Ross asks, raising an eyebrow at her.
“Pays well and college is expensive,” she says with a shrug. The wicked grin that comes across Ross’ face when his eyes glance over her body is a dead giveaway.
“I’m going to change,” I say. I race upstairs and change into spandex shorts, a sports bra, and a drop armhole tank top. When I get back to the kitchen, Remy smiles at me.
“That’s more clothing than I expected,” he remarks.
“You would know, wouldn’t you??” I say.
“Come on,” Cam laughs. “You two are welcome to join, since you are staying for dinner.”
“I have no idea what I’m getting myself into right now, do I?” Ross says.
“It’s not dirty,” Andrea laughs. “We’d love to.”
We go down to the basement and the right side of the room has mirrors along the wall and a pole mounted in the center. The floor has newly laid flooring and I can tell he spent a lot of time on this. “You did a lot,” I say.
“I worked on it the last few nights while you slept,” Remy says. He kisses me gently and nudges me toward the pole. “Go on. Pretend we aren’t here.”
“Okay,” I say happily. I go over to the speaker and hook my phone up to it before finding a song. The others grab folding chairs and sit off to one side as I stretch. When I get done, I pull off my shirt and take a deep breath.
“Take it off,” Remy hollers. I laugh and throw my shirt at him.
“Please don’t,” Ross laughs.
“Shhh,” I say. When the current song starts to wind down, I prepare for the song I chose.
I approach the pole and make sure it’s locked before grabbing a tight hold. I test my weight on it by swinging myself around once. When I am confident that there is no movement, I hook my leg and sling myself around so I can get upside down.
I easily get lost in the music, focusing on my hand placement and keeping myself securely attached to the pole.
Nothing about this is provocative or offensive.
I treat it like an art, because it is. When I am dancing, the world doesn’t exist. No one is after me.
No one wants me to hurt me. It’s just me and the music.
When the third song comes to an end, I am exhausted.
I bring myself down to land in a split before moving my legs out in front of me so I can lie back on the floor.
I am breathing heavily, but I am calm. For the first time since before George hurt me… I’m calm. “That was incredible,” Remy says as he offers me his hand. I take it and he pulls me up to stand so he can hug me.
“Thank you,” I say softly.
“You’re welcome, Little Fawn. Anything for you.” He kisses me softly, and I turn around to look at everyone. Cam has a strange look on his face, but Ross and Andrea are smiling.
“You are very talented,” Ross says. “I didn’t realize that takes so much strength.”
“Yeah, it’s taken a lot of practice,” I say.
“Well, I am going to start dinner,” Remy says.
“I am going to go take a shower,” I say, hoping I can escape everyone. Remy doesn’t say anything since the detectives are here, so I go upstairs before I get a lecture on boiling myself.
I start the shower and strip my clothes off while I go to the counter and take my makeup off.
I am tired and sweaty now, but I cannot wait to get into the shower.
I gasp and jump back when I turn and find Cameron standing in the doorway.
“Christ, Cam,” I say. I go to get into the shower and he grabs my waist and pulls me to stand in front of him.
“When I check this shower, what will I find?” he asks, almost daring me to lie.
“That it’s wet,” I say, letting the last word letting pop as I speak. I smile sweetly and try to turn again, but he grabs my throat and pulls me close.
“If that water is hotter than it should be, you and I are going to have a problem,” he says, leaning in to whisper in my ear. I smile when he pulls back, so I lean in to whisper in his ear.
“You talk a lot of shit for being my voyeur,” I say.
The growl that comes out of him is hotter than it should be.
I giggle and pull away from him so I can get into the shower.
I hold my breath when the hot water blasts me, but I notice that Cam is getting in with me.
I quickly turn and adjust the water right as he grabs me by the hair and pulls me back against his chest.
“I am so sick of you challenging me, Lori,” he says. “Can’t you see that we just want to help you?”
“I do see it,” I admit. “I see a lot of things.”
“Like what?” he asks, turning me around before backing me into a corner. He has his hands on the wall at my sides and I try my best to not look at his dick.
“Like the way you look at me,” I say quietly.
“How do I look at you?”
“The way Remy looks at me,” I answer, my voice getting smaller as he stares me down. He is towering over me and so close that I can feel the heat of his body.
“You knew we were going to check on you. Why did you still try to boil yourself?”
“I… Because… It reminds me that I am alive,” I admit.
“The pain?”
“No, just how it numbs my mind,” I say.
“What else does that for you?”
“Uh…” I laugh.
“Tell me,” he encourages, lifting my chin to look at him.
“Orgasms,” I say quietly. A devious grin spreads across his face as he pulls the shower head closest to us down.
“Put your foot on the bench,” he says. I give him a weird look, and he just points to the bench. After a moment, I do it. He turns the shower head around and it is on the rainfall setting. It feels nice, but I know what he is about to do. “Keep your eyes on me. Understood.”
“Cam,” I squeak out.
“Unless you are saying no, it can wait,” he says. “Are you saying no?”
“No,” I whisper.
“Good girl,” he smiles. Before I can say anything, he changes the water pattern on the shower head. The jet hits my clit, and I nearly collapse when my eyes roll back. He chuckles and puts my hand over my mouth so I don’t make a noise. “That feel good?”
“Mhmm,” I moan.
“Better than burning yourself?”
“Mhmm,” I say. I whimper when he smiles and fists his cock with his other hand.