Chapter 11 CASPIAN
I had a newfound confidence since I’d started dating Daddy Rick.
He kissed my scars and told me I looked beautiful, which I knew he was only saying because he had to.
It filled me with so much confidence, but I liked my sparkles, glitter, and blush.
It was part of me now, and it was part of the enjoyment my little side got.
Night after night, I’d been at his apartment, lying in his big bed, though obviously there were perks to the apartment above the bakery—one, it was above where I worked, and two, my friends lived there.
The other reasons were my things, but they were just things—it didn’t matter about them as long as you were with the right people to play with.
Although, very different types of play between my friends and Daddy.
And that seemed to create one big feelings culmination as I told him I loved him.
I didn’t know if he was going to say it back—but he did, almost immediately, though in my mind, it felt like forever.
We shared a passionate kiss after that, followed by me doing as instructed and changing out of my onesie.
I knew I should’ve worn something warmer to cycle over in but I also didn’t realize just how cold it was getting out there.
Fall should stand for temperature falling instead of leaves falling.
It was all good in the end, with my warm onesie on. He told me he loved me again, unprompted, as I pulled the dough, which had expanded inside the Tupperware container. It was beside the large bag of cheddar cheese. We couldn’t have cheese twist breadsticks without the good stuff.
As much as I baked all day in the bakery, I loved doing it in Daddy’s apartment with him.
Rolling out dough, sprinkling cheese, making sure the sizing was right, all of it under Daddy’s watchful eye, and occasional grubby hand as he was not at all dough dexterous—a skill you needed when working with dough.
“My sister is thinking of visiting,” he said as both of our hands were in the dough.
“That would be fun,” I said. “Getting to meet your family.”
“Just my sister and my niece and nephew,” he said.
“Right.” I nodded. “You’ve met my family, right? They live in the little cul-de-sac suburban nightmare.” I snorted a laugh.
“It’s possible,” he said, keeping his eyes locked with mine. He pulled a hand out of the dough and dotted a finger of flour on my nose. “And you know I have no relationship with my father.”
Wrinkling my nose, I didn’t want to distract from him telling me about his family. “You’ve mentioned him being homophobic.”
“And the fact I was married to a woman, right?” As he spoke, he nodded.
“Yeah, are you worried your sister’s going to say something that’ll shock me?” I giggled, digging my fingers into the dough to fold in the cheese. “Because I’m obsessed with you. Nothing could scare me away from you.”
He kissed my nose, right where the dot of flour was, now transferred to his mouth.
He licked it away. “Not sure if that’s safe,” he said.
“You don’t do that. And yeah.” I thought he was going to say more, but he went quiet, and we went back to the dough, making sure our cheese twist breadsticks were well incorporated with all the cheese.
Once they were in the oven, we cleaned up. Daddy sat in his armchair, and I sat across his lap with a book in hand for him to read to me. He looked at the book, then back to me. “You want me to read this, or you can ask me more questions about my family?”
I gnawed at the edge of my lip lightly. The intense urge to know gossip prevailed. “Okay, I have questions,” I said with a giddy smile and giggle. “What did your dad do?”
“Okay,” he said, nodding. “I’ll tell you in the form of a story. But we don’t have long, food will be ready soon.”
Getting comfy with a bum wiggle on his lap, I wrapped my arms around his neck. Our faces were inches apart from each other. I just wanted to be there for him when he exposed his soul for me.
“A long time ago, in a very dark castle, the paths in and out of it were covered with poisonous thorns. There was no leaving. Except, one day, a very nice girl who I loved very dearly, told me we could escape to the city. However, the girl’s family were part of this small village too, and they decided to pressure them—me—into marriage, a new union in the village,” he said, and I could see it behind his eyes, almost a struggle.
“You see, the boy who’d tried to escape in the first place, he did so because he had a family who held very conservative views.
They wanted boys to go hunting, to be—be soldiers, and basically machines of rage used like some type of social standing.
But this boy, he’d rather run track, he’d rather watch the wrestling than take part in it—for some obvious reasons. ”
I giggled. “Naughty.”
“And I knew—he knew from a young age that he was different, but he also knew it was wrong—wrong in the eyes of his family. He’d heard every slur they ever said, the deep hatred and vitriol that spilled out of their mouths.
He thought—marrying this girl was his way out, and it was, for a moment, but now only eighteen and under the thumb of two equally hateful families, he felt powerless.
So he escaped with the girl, and she went to New York to become a badass in business, and he—me—I became a fireman, and never looked back. ”
“I’m sorry you went through all that.” I cuddled him tight.
“And I always thought everyone else was like that,” he whispered. “I kept it secret. As long as I could afford my own life, I was okay to keep it to myself and let myself be free at home, or in one of the big cities.”
I squeezed him until he made a joke about me cutting off his air supply. “Nobody deserves that,” I told him.
“I know, and I have gay friends in New York and Burlington. I even have a friend on the Maple Kings team,” he said.
I swatted a hand at his chest. “Okay, not telling you to out them, but I know there’s a couple of out guys on the team,” I said. “Isn’t it owned by some rich gay billionaire?”
He shrugged. “I didn’t know you were into ice hockey,” he said. “We should go see a game together.”
“Yeah, I’m a huge Sharks fan,” I told him. “I like how rough they get on the ice. Oh my god, you remember our first date? Well, Toby and Keaton went to the rink, and they saw the Sharks finish practice.” I stuck my tongue out to pretend to salivate. “Dreamy.”
“Hey,” he said, laughing. “No more of that. You’ve only got eyes for Daddy now.”
Sucking my tongue back in, I pouted. “Yes, Daddy.”
“Same goes for me,” he said, kissing my cheek and pressing his lips there. I was growing a little more comfortable with him touching them, but I was still very self-conscious about the acne scarring. “Love you.”
It was a simple phrase, and it had me grinning from ear to ear, probably radiating enough heat to become a furnace and start baking everything in here.
I kissed him on the lips, both my hands pressed to his cheeks, pushing them together all chubby so his mouth parted like he was a fishy.
And I kissed him again. “Love you more,” I said.
It was a sensation in my belly, a fire, almost like all those butterflies in there were kissing too.
“I’m not sure that’s possible,” he whispered in my ear, his hand now slipping down my back as he reached for my ass.
Wrapping both arms around me, he lifted me out of the armchair and stood.
His big fireman muscles were pulsing almost, showing me just how strong he was.
“We should go make food before I decide to eat you instead.” He pretended to gnaw on my neck. His scruff tickled me.
This wasn’t so much of a threat, because he was always trying to bite or lick at me—especially where a little frosting or whipped cream on my skin was concerned.
* * *
I was nervous about meeting his family. It wasn’t the morning after and I was in the bakery, telling Toby and Keaton about it. They were both annoying about the entire situation, and I just wanted to sink into some of the cake batter and be baked at a high temperature until I was turned to a crisp.
“Too soon,” Keaton said, sucking on his teeth. “You don’t know if they’re going to like you, and if they don’t, he might just say bye to you there and then.”
“But obviously they’ll like you,” Toby added, readying a hand towel to whip at Keaton. “You’ll just have to hide the books you’ve taken.”
“Oh, yeah, we noticed books going missing from the library box,” Keaton said.
“Okay, stop ganging up on me.” My brow furrowed and a pout formed on my lips. “I’m excited to meet his sister, and his niece and nephew—they’re like ten and eleven, or something, so I can relate to them as a former child, you know.”
“And a current big baby,” Keaton giggled.
Toby playfully whipped at the air near Keaton with the hand towel. “You’re the biggest baby,” he said. “So protective over your Sippee cup.”
He gasped. “That’s because I didn’t want you slobbering all over it,” he said, grabbing the hand towel. “And the same goes for my pacies.”
I pretended to vomit. “Eugh. Gross.” Play speaking, they liked the pacies and Sippee cups. I didn’t like the way the rubbery plastic felt on my teeth, so they weren’t my cup of tea—and thankfully so, otherwise I would’ve been involved in this fight as well.
The bell above the door rang and we had to get back to work.
With Keaton up at the front, it was nice to focus again, except my focus was marred by the impending test and doom that might come from meeting Daddy Rick’s family.
I knew it was all going to be okay, but I’d have to be in adult mode, and sometimes it sucked major. I just wanted to relax.
Whipping cake batter by hand into a fury, Toby laughed at me and said something I didn’t hear until he came over and said it again, his hand on my shoulder.
“Huh?”