The Heartbreaking Truth
Morgan
I spent two days planting the perennials around Creed’s Lake. I loved it when Creed said I could create a small flower garden right outside the community center. All that was left to plant were the fruit trees. I decided to plant those with Addie in the coming days. They would be planted in memory of Callie.
Addie’s room was ready, Creed had a security system placed around the portion of the lake near his home, the playhouse was built, and I had all of Addie’s clothes and toys organized in her bedroom. I couldn’t think of anything else to do in preparation, but I was nervous. I even called Melissa and asked her to meet with me about an opportunity for her. I didn’t need a nanny full time, but what I did need was someone to travel with me and watch over Addie. I thought Melissa would be a familiar face, and since school let out for the summer, those particular familiar faces wouldn’t be available until the fall. It wasn’t safe to take Addie to the trailer park and drop her off. Just because I was retiring from acting didn’t mean I didn’t need help with other things. I needed someone to take over for my parents, who were dealing with my agent, my business manager, and my attorney. There were interviews I had to do for the new film, and I needed someone to handle my schedule. So, Melissa would be a part time nanny and full time personal assistant. I couldn’t expect her to stop babysitting just to accompany us on our very rare travels. So, I thought of a more permanent full time position. Creed was working on her background check to see if she was even a candidate to bring on board.
It didn’t help when Jake called and wanted to have a little talk. He felt like I was pushing him away, which was partially true, but it wasn’t by choice. I had to protect Creed’s Lake, and we were under lockdown. I promised things would get easier further down the road and that I still loved him dearly. He made me feel guilty, which was the last thing I needed at the time. I knew he was just concerned, and I appreciated it, but my promise to protect Creed's Lake was important to me.
The prior evening, I busied myself by baking cookies and cupcakes while Creed was doing something in the off limits room upstairs. I wanted everything to be perfect for Addie, and I thought Creed might have been just as nervous as me. He was locked in that room for hours, and when he came out, he seemed exhausted. I knew there were things I wasn’t privileged to know, but I didn’t like what I saw. He was only out of that room long enough to get a drink then kissed the top of my head, told me goodnight, and went back to that room. He didn’t just look exhausted, he seemed very stressed out.
Choosing an outfit was difficult. I wanted to present as classy as possible without intimidating Addie. I also didn’t want to look like a Hollywood brat. I couldn’t believe the day had finally come, and we were just hours from bringing Addie home.
I chose a respectful summer dress, wore my hair up in a ponytail, and chose a pair of sandals. I was just packing my handbag when there was a knock on my door. “Its open.”
The door opened and Creed stuck his head in, but instead of talking, he ran his hand down his face as his eyes trailed from mine, all the way to my toes. Over the last few days, things grew even more intense between us. I didn’t know what was holding him back. If it weren’t moments like that one, where he looked at me like he wanted to devour me, then it was intimate moments he cut short with one excuse or another.
“Are you ready to go?” I asked as I clasped my handbag shut.
“Umm…yeah. The umm…what’s that thing?” When I turned to face him, his eyes landed on my breasts then quickly shot up to my eyes. “That car thing…seat thing is in the SUV. Do we need to take anything with us? Like how Zoey always carries that bag packed with a million things?”
My lips turned up into a smile. “That would be a diaper bag, and no, Addie doesn’t need a diaper bag. Although I did pack a tote with some juice boxes, a few cookies, a coloring book, and some crayons for the trip home.” I learned a few days prior that CPS, due to the situation, worked with a different county so that Addie could stay in a foster home in Kokomo. Creed didn’t seem as surprised so I had my suspicions he might have had someone watching over Addie and the foster home. I felt terrible, because it wasn’t about Shane and the men he associated with, but the media attention on the case. It was just under a three hour trip both ways. A few of Creed’s security detail would follow on their bikes, but give us enough space so it wasn’t obvious they were with us.
“Okay, well if we don’t want to be late, we better be going.” Creed said and I followed him downstairs and grabbed the tote I packed. Soon, he was behind the wheel, and I was next to him in the passenger seat. Creed’s idea of being late and mine were two different things. To Creed, anything less than fifteen minutes early, was being late. To me, being late meant five minutes after the designated time. I was so nervous, because I knew things wouldn’t be easy with Addie.
It was two days prior when I finally was able to speak to Addie’s foster mother. The case worker in charge of Addie’s case agreed it would be a great idea, so I knew how well Addie was doing before I finally got to see her. She said Addie talked a lot about “the big guy” and how he saved Auntie Morgan. Addie also said she understood that her mommy and daddy went to heaven, but she would be coming to live with me. That her mommy always told her if anything ever happened, Auntie Morgan would take care of her. I was also informed that Addie was having nightmares about that night and always cried out for the big guy. They didn’t know what that meant, but I was more than aware. She would also ask for a man named Caleb, which I knew by then, she was speaking about Sniper. As far as behavior, there were a few instances where Addie acted out. She tried to run away to go find her mommy, which told me she didn’t understand everything as well as her foster mom thought. Addie wasn’t playing with the other children and mostly staying to herself. I hated the fact that she had to make adjustments again, but that wouldn’t be the last one she had to make. She had to adjust again when everything was over, and we bought our own home.
I was nervously looking out the window and biting my nail when Creed reached over for my hand. He glanced at me and smiled before turning back to the road and squeezing my hand.
Taking Addie wasn’t a decision I made the night Callie died. It was a decision I made when Callie asked me to be her Godmother. Callie wasn’t Catholic, so the decision to make me her godmother wasn’t so that I looked over her religious education and activity with the church. She straight up asked me to care for Addie as my own daughter if anything ever happened. Becoming her godmother was me agreeing to Callie’s request. It was a decision I made knowing it could actually happen. I always knew Callie was at risk as long as she was with Shane. I already knew he physically harmed her and if she didn’t leave the outcome would likely be grim.
Creed had been quiet since the time he spent in the off limits room. I glanced at him and saw he looked nervous, but it was about more than Addie. It was written all over his face.
“What’s wrong, Creed?”
He glanced at me, drew in a deep breath and let it out. “I wanted to talk to you about something after Addie was settled, but something has come up and I need to…” He shook his head. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
I smiled over at him. “Yeah, I think I caught that.” I squeezed his hand.
“I hope you understand there are things I don’t tell you. Things that I knew I could eventually share, but the timing was all wrong. Of course, you already know I deal with some highly confidential things I could never tell you as well.”
I nodded my head. “That’s what you’ve always said, but you’re scaring me right now. Are you going on a mission or something?” My heart was racing.
“Its something I thought wasn’t necessary to tell you at first but…but after last night I think you should know before we bring Addie home. I thought the long drive would give us some time uninterrupted.”
“Okay, lay it on me gently.”
He squeezed my hand, glanced at me, then his eyes met the road again. “You know I wasn’t actually in the service long enough to officially retire. I just didn’t re-up when it was my time.”
“Yes, I understand that, Creed.”
He squeezed my hand again. “Just because someone is honorably discharged and given the DD214, doesn’t always mean the military is done with them. A little less than two years after my military separation, I was called back up and sent back to Afghanistan. After that obligation was fulfilled, I thought I was done again.”
“They can legally do that to you?” I asked.
He sighed. “Its perfectly legal with an executive order. In all, they called back two hundred and seventeen men. I was one of them. Axton ran everything here with the help of all the Originals. I was gone for six months. I wasn’t home for another whole year when I was called up again, but this was different. I was called back to duty, again. Not to be an active soldier, but to assist a very high ranking General with a Special Tactics Squadron. As you may have noticed, I visit that locked room daily, but last night was the first time I was needed to command a small mission since you arrived to stay with me.”
My heart may have flat lined. “Creed, are you trying to tell me you are still in the military? Like, active duty?”
He shook his head. “Not active duty per se, more like constantly on standby. I help command missions from that room, and from time to time, I am expected at the Pentagon. This Squadron is very elite, and very few people know it exists. I was called back up by the executive order of the President. I didn’t choose it, and definitely wasn’t given a choice. I was still within the risk time of being called back up the first time, and that started the clock all over again. Axton is the only person, other than you now, who knows I am again serving the military.”
“Wait, if its top secret, then why are you telling me?” My heart was shattering.
“You deserve to know everything about me, and you know why, Morgan.” He glanced at me then back to the road. “You’re…well I guess I’m trying to say we both feel it, but I can’t move forward until you know everything about me.” He glanced at me again and I knew my eyes were huge. “You don’t have to say anything, just know that I’m open to it, but until you know everything I am free to share about myself, we can’t take this anywhere.”
“You’re free to tell me about a top secret squadron you command?” I was confused, but I didn’t miss a word he just said about us.
“I’ve only told you what I am permitted to say to those closest to me. Its typically just our next of kin that know we are actively serving. Axton is the only person close enough to me to be listed as my personal contact in my official paperwork since I don’t have any family. He knows you’re being told, but none of the other Originals or anyone in the community knows, and that’s for a certain reason. I just need you to keep this to yourself.”
“Why?” I had mixed emotions. He was telling me this for a reason, something was happening.
“Not only because of the nature of what I am doing, but we have a strict policy of not hiring active service members. Mostly because it would be frowned upon by the military, and we count on the contracts we have with them. Do you remember meeting Denny?” He asked and I nodded my head then whispered yes.
“His brother is a member of Delta Force. He followed in his big brothers footsteps. He wanted to prospect because he was on a special project at Camp Atterbury for a few months. It was unusual for a member of Delta force to be assigned to a base operated by the National Guard. Prospects aren’t paid, but their living expenses and insurance are covered, but they aren’t under a long term contract. We turned him away, but invited him to join once he separated from the Army. It was to avoid any issues with the Military. Since I was called back, I didn’t fall under the same scrutiny as an enlisted man. He’s serving in the middle east right now, but once this tour is over, he can choose not to re-up and get his discharge papers. We felt there would probably be some pushback if we were open about my current status.”
I swallowed hard. “What does this mean, Creed?”
“After what I learned last night, I’d like you and Addie to live in my home on Creed’s Lake, because in six weeks, I won’t be around for an undetermined amount of time. I don’t want to have to worry about you and Addie living on your own. You’re safe in my house, the community provides the structure Addie needs, and you said it yourself. You feel like you can live a semi normal life inside the community. You’ll have all the Originals to watch over you and that would make leaving a little easier on me.”
I started to cry. “Where are they sending you?”
He shook his head slightly. “I can’t tell you anything other than it’s not on American soil.”
I let go of his hand and reached for my handbag to get a tissue. “What will you tell everyone?” I pulled out a tissue and used it to wipe my nose. I hated the way I no longer could control my emotions.
“Axton and I spoke last night, I will tell the Originals in a few days. We will make a decision together on what to tell everyone else.”
I shook my head as I cried. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I knew there would be a mission, but I never thought this would happen. It won’t be like it is with the others, will it?”
I went to one send off during my time at Creed’s Lake. The mess hall served up a huge breakfast in the middle of the night, and when it was time for the operatives to leave, they boarded a small bus, and everyone waved goodbye. Then four days later, they came back, and we all enjoyed a very nice cookout at the beach to celebrate their return.
“No, this won’t be like a mission. I’ll leave and not know when I will return. It could be a few months, or it could be a year. It wont be over until our targets are located and dealt with accordingly. If we succeed in our goal, the squadron will be dismantled, and it will be as if it never existed. I will be discharged for the third and final time.”
It felt like someone kicked me in the gut.
“And you weren’t given a choice?” My voice was shaky.
“No, I wanted my separation from the military to be permanent. I never wanted to serve again, not after…” He didn’t finish that sentence.
“Not after what, Creed?” I needed to know.
“Not after my last tour with the Originals.” He shut down and didn’t say another word about it. I looked down at the tissue in my hand and didn’t know what to say. I needed to think, because it was a lot to process. I wanted Creed, hell not just wanted him, but needed him. It wasn’t the security he provided, and it had nothing to do with Creed’s Lake. I needed the man. I thought about him night and day. Every minute of my day was based on his schedule. Every morning when I woke, I hoped that would be the day he finally let all his walls down and took me into his arms. After what he told me, I needed him more than ever.