Chapter Fifty-six
Vida
T he carnival is alive with color and music, laughter spilling from every direction. My long white gown trails behind me slightly as I walk, the fabric clinging to my body in just the right way. The slit exposes one of my legs with every step I take, and I can feel Ciro’s eyes on me as I move through the crowd.
The butterfly designed heels he’d gotten me are the best part of my outfit, and I love how it’s become our thing. My favorite little insect.
He looks devastatingly good in his dark blue suit, with his blue eyes shining beautifully in the night. Do I miss seeing him with brown eyes? Not in the slightest!
I find myself beside Carmela with her bright energy matching the event of the evening. We’d left the men and spent time talking with a few friends and cousins, before finally getting some alone time for ourselves.
“So,” she begins, smiling warmly, “When will you tell him?”
I freeze for a moment, my smile slowly fading away.
“I don’t know yet,” I say with a slight shrug. “Maybe later tonight.”
That’s what I’ve been saying for two weeks now. It’s been easy to hide a growing tummy since Ciro has been swamped with work, but as I stood in front of the mirror today, it had somehow become more noticeable.
How had I gone four months without knowing I was pregnant? Well, I just assumed the hormonal imbalances were thanks to my period acting up. With all of the stress we’d been going through, my period, or lack thereof, was the last thing on my mind. Once I’d finally realized it had been a while, I took a test, and here I am, entering my fifth month of pregnancy with a semi-swollen belly.
“You know you’ve got to tell him. He’ll be ecstatic,” she says, dragging me out of my thoughts.
“Tell me what?” Ciro interrupts, startling me as he stands behind me.
I turn to face him, his expression mixed with curiosity and suspicion. His gaze moves from me to Carmela, who immediately raises her hands in surrender.
“Does your tummy hurt, chaos?” Ciro asks, looking at how my hands cover my tummy, a new habit I’d started since I found out, which turned into my flimsy way of hiding the truth.
“I need to use the restroom,” I blurt out, my voice unnaturally high. Without waiting for a response, I turn and walk away, my heels clicking loudly as I make my escape.
The room I find is quiet and surreal, lined entirely with mirrors. My reflection stares back at me from every angle and I hesitate for a moment before stepping inside. The door clicks shut behind me and the music from the carnival slowly fades away.
I stand in the center of the room, surrounded by countless versions of myself, and walk towards the first mirror my legs take me to. I place my hands on my belly, brushing over the curve that is barely there. It isn’t as visible yet, but it is noticeable if you look closely. It looks like I’ve added some weight, but with a closer look, you can tell it might not be just weight.
He or she is there.
My chest tightens as a wave of emotions hits me; joy, fear, uncertainty. The gravity of it all presses down on me, and I let out a shaky breath as my fingers circle slowly around my belly.
“You’re beautiful,” a voice says, making me jump.
I look up to see Ciro’s reflection behind mine. He is leaning casually against the doorframe, his gaze fixed on me like I’m the only thing in the room.
Well, technically I am. The room is filled with my reflection after all.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, flashing him a slight smile.
He pushes off the frame and steps closer.
“Strip,” he says, the single word laced with so much command.
“What?” I blink, certain I didn’t hear him right.
“Strip, chaos,” he repeats, “Fill this room with every inch of your reflection. I want you to see how you consume my mind with your body.”
I hesitate for a few seconds, but with Ciro, with this man I’ve fallen utterly in love with, all I know how to do is yield to him.
Slowly, my hands move to the high neckline of my gown, and I begin to pull it down. The cloth slides over my shoulders, pooling at my waist before finally falling to the floor. My reflection multiplies in every direction, and for the first time in a long time, I feel vulnerable and insecure in front of him.
I watch as his eyes follow every movement, darkening with each inch of skin I reveal. When I finally stand here, bare and exposed, surrounded by countless versions of myself, he takes in a sharp breath and loosens the tie around his neck.
As his gaze drops to my belly, I immediately cover it with my hands. He arches his brow in confusion as he stares at me, seeing right through me like he always can and has been doing since I found out. But my excuse won’t last long anymore.
“Move your hands,” he says softly, his voice almost a whisper.
I hesitate as my heart pounds in my chest, but I obey. I slowly let my hands fall to my sides, exposing the slight swell of my stomach.
Ciro stares at me with an unreadable expression.
“You look perfect, chaos, even if you’ve gained some weight,” he assures me again, just like he’s been doing since I started to lie about why I cover my tummy.
I shake my head, tired of carrying this lie with me. This is the perfect time to tell him.
“It’s not why,” I say, tears instantly forming behind my eyes.
The silence becomes louder than the music outside, so loud and deafening in my ears. I stare straight at Ciro through his reflection in front of me and after a minute or two of silence, I see it, the moment realization finally dawns on him.
His breath hitches and his body tenses as his eyes snap up to meet mine in the mirror. Without a single word, he crosses the room in a few long strides, and comes to stand in front of me.
The first tear rolls down my cheek as his hand reaches out to grab my chin. He tilts my face towards his, before crashing his lips against mine in a kiss so fierce it steals the air from my lungs.
The world disappears in that moment, leaving just him, me, the reflections of us, and a baby who we’re about to welcome into this beautifully cruel world.
Ciro
I reach out, placin g my hand on her stomach after letting go of her lips. She flinches slightly but doesn’t pull away. I let my hand rest there, and I feel it, the undeniable truth that is about to change everything.
“You’re… we’re pregnant,” I say, forming the words with my mouth, like I needed to say it to know how real it really was.
She nods and another tear rolls down her perfect cheek.
“I wanted to tell you when I found out, I just . . .” she pauses, shaking her head.
How long has she been beating herself up? I’m not mad. Fuck! I could never be mad at the mother of my child! I’m not that stupid.
I don’t let her finish. I cup her face, pull her to me and kiss her again. I pour everything I can’t put into words into the kiss, hoping she can feel just how happy I am and how much I love her.
As I pull back, her tears continue to fall down her cheeks, more now than before.
“You’ve given me more than I ever thought I deserved, chaos,” I say, my voice thick with emotion.
“This . . .” I rub her belly, “our child, it’s the greatest gift you could ever give me that isn’t you. And I swear to you, I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure you and this baby never have to question how far I’ll go for you two.”
“Ciro . . .” she whispers as a soft sob leaves her lips.
I press my forehead against hers, my other hand wrapping around her naked frame as I let myself breathe in the air she exhales. I am lucky, the luckiest man to be exact, to have the privilege of not only loving her, but being loved by her to the point where she carries my child.
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done to me? You’re in my blood, baby. In my fucking soul. And now . . .” I glance down at her belly. “Now you’re giving me more of you. Something I didn’t even know I needed.”
“Ciro, I . . .” she tries to say.
“No, chaos.” I stop her, grabbing her wrists gently, but firmly. “Tonight, you let me worship you. You let me show you what you mean to me.”
I turn her toward the mirrors, pressing her body lightly against the cool glass. My hands slide down her sides, memorizing every curve as I lean in and brush my lips against the nape of her neck, where our family tattoo rests.
“Look at yourself,” I say. “Look at how you make the universe jealous of your very existence.”
I press a kiss to her shoulder, then another to the base of her neck, before licking her earlobe and taking my time as I savor the taste of her skin.
“I want you to see us,” I continue as my lips trail down her spine. “Every angle, every reflection. I want you to see how I love you, how I’ll always love you.”
My hand slides between her thighs, teasing her. She lets out a soft moan, her head falling back against my chest. I want her to see just how fucked she’s made me, so I catch her chin, tilting her face toward the mirrors.
“Don’t look away,” I command, “I want you to see every corner of us, chaos. Watch how I love you. Watch how I ruin you.”
She nods as she turns her head to face the mirror, her eyes locking onto our reflections.
I lift her, her legs wrapping around my waist instantly, before I press her back against the mirror. Without a second to lose, I use one hand to unbuckle my melt and then bury myself completely inside her. I lean my forehead against hers as I move slowly, gently, deeply, and smoothly.
Her pussy welcomes me, wrapping its walls around my veiny, throbbing cock.
I thought she looked breathtaking in that dress, but looking at our reflections now, she’s so magnificent as she begs me to move faster.
“You feel how perfectly you fit me? You were made for me, Vida. Every inch of you was made for me,” I whisper against her lips.
Her nails dig into my back and her moans fill the room as I tilt her head, forcing her to look at the mirrors again.
“I love your butt,” she giggles before moaning again loudly and tightening her legs around my waist. “And your cock.”
“Oh fuck, Ciro! You were made for me! Only you! Just you! Just me! Please! Yes,” she cries as I thrust in deeper.
“Yes, baby,” I chuckle, biting her neck and sucking on her skin.
Her eyes move from me and the reflections surrounding us.
“Yes. Yes, Ciro, please! Yes! More,” she pleads, making me move deeper, harder. I want her to feel me, not just physically but in every part of her soul, as if I can knit myself into her very being.
That is where I belong, after all.
“We’re so beautiful, baby,” she says as she looks around, trying to muffle her moans and cries. Her nails dug deeper into my skin, tearing my body open and drawing blood. “It’s me and you. This is what we are, isn’t it?”
“Yes, chaos, it is. Inevitably and undeniably intertwined.”
I thrust deeper, pulling a moan from her lips that makes my chest tighten with pride and something far more primal. Her head falls back against the mirror, her body arching into mine, and I take the opportunity to place my hand against her stomach. My palm rests there, over the swell that marks the beginning of our child’s life, and for a moment, I slow down, letting the realization wash over me again.
“You’re carrying us,” I murmur, staring into her eyes.
Her hand covers mine, pulling me out of my trance, and I look into her eyes that are full of unshed tears.
“Ciro . . .” she whispers, her voice trembling.
I don’t let her finish, my pace quickening, but not rough. I use her wetness to move slowly and deeper into her, making sure every deliberate thrust drives us both insane in ways that we won’t ever forget. Her cries grow louder, echoing off the walls and bouncing back at us through the mirrors.
“Say it,” I growl, my hand tightening on her waist as I drive in deeper. “Say you’re mine.”
“I’m yours,” she gasps.
“And I’m yours,” I say, my voice softening as I press a kiss to her temple.
When her body begins to tremble, I know she’s close. I angle my hips, hitting the spot that makes her shatter beneath me. Her moans turn into cries, and I feel her walls tighten around me.
I bury my face in her neck as I follow her, filling her shamelessly. Even though I know now that she is already full, it still doesn’t stop me.
When I finally lift my head, I stare at her, loving how her cheeks are flushed and how her lips are still red. And her eyes . . . God, her eyes, those eyes that never hide anything when they stare at me. It was the first little thing that made me love her without even realizing it.
“You see us now?” I ask, my voice low as I brush a strand of hair from her face. “You see what we are?”
“I see it, Ciro. I see us.” She nods as she smiles softly.
I kiss her forehead as my arms tighten around her, and in that moment, surrounded by endless reflections of our love, I know one thing with absolute certainty . . . she is mine, and I am hers, and we have a new addition who is proof of everything we both have become.