10. Chapter 10
10
Chapter 10
Bronwen
The silence was suffocating. Every rustle of leaves, every snort from the horses, and every bird flying above seemed louder than it should have been. The magic flowing through me had me jumpy, its constant hum a relentless presence in my mind. Every moment was a battle to keep it contained, to stop it from spilling out. We were nearing home, and Papa hadn’t said one word to me yet.
I knew it was coming. Anytime Papa was this quiet, it was because something was bothering him. And I knew what it was.
He didn’t want me to go out alone.
As our barn came into view, I tapped Shadow’s side lightly to have him move a little faster. Just a little closer and I’d be away from the conversation that I knew was coming.
“Winnie,” Papa mumbled.
I pretended like I couldn’t hear him.
“Bronwen.”
Great. He used his Father of the coven tone, and he said my real name.
I pulled on the reins and brought Shadow to a halt. Whipping my head around, I said, “I am not hunting with others. I’d rather die.”
He stayed silent for a moment. “Winnie.”
“You can either put bars on my window and lock me in my room or let me hunt alone. Those are your options.”
He stared at me a moment, and something that was almost a smile formed on his lips. “I know.”
What?
“You . . . know ?”
He nodded. “Please just be careful. That’s all I wanted to say.”
I tried to form the words, but nothing came out. With the click of his heel, his horse jolted forward and left me stunned.
At least he knew.
I stared at myself in the mirror in my room, barely recognizing the face that looked back. My reflection seemed foreign, haunted by dark circles under my eyes. I ran my fingers along the dark circles under my eyes, but quickly pulled my hand away before I did something I’d regret.
Any other time I had magic, getting rid of the blemishes would have been my first priority, but priorities change, unfortunately.
Mama stuck her head into my room. “Lowen is here to see you.”
I tilted my head and ran my fingers through my hair. Maybe he was what I needed right now. A distraction.
“Tell him I will be out in a moment.”
Mama nodded and left.
Before walking out of my room, I added a little lipstick and perfume. I smoothed my hands over my dress, ensuring it sat just right before adjusting a loose strand of hair behind my ear. Taking a deep breath, I glanced at my reflection one last time, forcing a small smile.
Mama gave me a knowing look when I walked into the kitchen before nodding toward the back door. Her lips twitched as if she wanted to say something but decided against it.
I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help the small smirk that tugged at my lips. She always saw more than she let on.
As I stepped into the shade of the barn, I saw Lowen petting Shadow. He had a small box tucked under his arm.
“Lowen,” I said, drawing his attention away from Shadow.
His face lit up with a boyish smile as he turned to me, his excitement evident. “I got you the chocolates,” he said, extending the small box toward me, his fingers gripping the edges like he was afraid I might refuse.
“Thank you.”
I reached out, my hand lingering a moment atop his as I took the box. My fingers brushed against his, and for a brief second, neither of us moved. My eyes trailed over him, taking in the way he had chosen the blue shirt I once complimented. The top few buttons were left undone, revealing the warm tan of his skin. He had styled his hair differently today, slightly tousled but in an intentional way, as if he had taken extra time to make sure it looked effortless.
When I met his gaze again, he was watching me carefully, uncertainty flickering in his expression. I didn’t blame him. I was unpredictable, and each time he saw me, he never knew which version of me he would get .
And today he’d get the one he wanted.
I needed to feel him. To feel something that would make me feel real again. I was balancing on a short wall between reality and the part inside of me that was a mix between stolen magic and lack of sleep.
I took the chocolates from him and placed them on the old wooden work table. Taking a slow step closer, I let my hand rest on the waist of his pants, my fingers tracing the fabric lightly.
“I’ve missed you,” he murmured, his voice softer now as he cupped my face, his thumb brushing against my cheek.
I met his gaze through hooded eyes before sliding my hand up his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin through the fabric. “I’ve missed you too,” I whispered, my voice barely audible between us.
His fingers lingered at my temple, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear before trailing down to my jaw. The touch was light, hesitant, before he finally pulled me into him. His lips pressed softly against mine, a slow, testing kiss, but I refused to let hesitation linger. Reaching up, I tugged him closer, deepening the kiss, feeling the urgency rise between us.
In one swift motion, he lifted me, his hands firm against my waist as he set me on the table. The chocolates slipped from the edge, the small box tumbling to the ground. I bit my lip as they scattered across the floor, forgotten in the moment.
At least I had another reason to bid him away when I grew bored of him again.
He brought his hand up my leg, pushing my dress along with it. As we continued to kiss, his fingers slid inside of me. I moaned under his touch as I gently rocked against him .
I slowly unbuttoned his shirt, my fingers grazing over the fabric, eager to feel the warmth of his broad chest beneath my hands. He met my pace, shrugging it off his shoulders before returning to me, his lips trailing up my neck, lingering at my pulse.
“I want all of you, Bronwen,” he murmured against my skin, his voice rough with desire. A quiet clink filled the air as he unfastened his belt, the sound sending a shiver through me.
“No. Some things need to be left until—” I stopped myself before I almost said something I’d regret. I didn’t want to further our relationship, and in the beginning I thought he felt the same way. It was fun.
That was all it was.
Until one day I could see his feelings change. The gifts he brought me, the compliments he gave me—more about my laugh or my stubbornness and less about my looks. I blamed myself. I should have stopped this the moment I began to notice.
He leaned back, his brows knitting together. “Until what?” His tone was softer now, hesitant, but there was a sharp edge of hope clinging to his words, one that only deepened my unease.
I pulled him back to me, our lips meeting again.
“Marry me,” he managed to say through the kisses, his voice trembling with a vulnerability I hadn’t expected.
I pushed him off of me. “What?” My heart sank as his words hung in the air, their weight pressing against my chest. This—this was what I was trying to avoid. A relationship was one thing, but a promise like that? It wasn’t just about marriage; it was about what I’d lose. Lowen wasn’t a witch. If I tied myself to him, I’d have to give up a side of me. I’d never feel magic coursing through my veins or even the small thrill of hunting vampires. It wasn’t a compromise I was willing to make.
Lowen looked at me a moment before grabbing my hand and getting on one knee. “Bronwen, I love—”
“Get up.” I rolled my eyes.
His brows knit together in confusion as I cut him off, hesitation flickering across his face before he finally stood up. “What is this?”
“What?” I pushed my dress down covering my legs once again.
“Us. I have done nothing but try and yet every time I feel like we are getting somewhere. You push me away.”
I hopped off the table and walked past him, making my way to Shadow. As I reached out to pet him, he flinched slightly, his ears flicking back as if sensing the unsteady rhythm of my heartbeat. I ran my fingers through his mane, taking slow, measured breaths, trying to steady myself as the weight of the moment settled over me.
“I’ve never said there was an us,” I mumbled, my voice barely audible as I turned to him. “This is fun. Isn’t that enough? Why does it have to be more?” The words tasted hollow, even to me, but I wasn’t ready to give him anything else.
“I have turned down many advances for you,” he said, his voice shaking with frustration. “I’ve chosen you, Bronwen. Doesn’t that mean anything?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “I never told you to do that.”
His expression turned cold. “Have you been giving your time to others? Is that why you push me away?” He stepped closer to me. “You—you’re whoring around?”
Before I could stop myself—though I’m not sure I would’ve done it differently—my fist made contact with his face. He grabbed his cheek and looked at me with wide eyes.
Shadow stirred in his stall, letting out a loud snort, his ears flicking back at the tension in the air.
I bent down, snatching Lowen’s shirt off the ground, and tossed it at him with a sharp flick of my wrist. “Lowen, leave before I do something you’ll regret.” My voice was steady, but the heat rising in my chest was anything but.
His jaw tightened, his hands clenching at his sides. He stared at me for a long moment, something dark flashing behind his eyes—something I hadn’t seen from him before. Then, without another word, he turned on his heel and stormed out, his footsteps echoing in the quiet barn.
***
I scoured the woods for hours, the magic pulsing through my veins like a second heartbeat. A melodic tune hummed in my mind, soft but insistent, growing louder with every step I took.
Use me. Use me. Use me.
The words looped in my mind, a seductive chant that wrapped around my thoughts, squeezing tighter each time I resisted.
“Go away,” I mumbled as I hit my head with my hand. I had never heard that before, but I also had never held on to magic for longer than a few hours before I would use it to have our baron fruit trees bare fruit in the middle of winter, or make my hair a little shinier, or even just to do something to scare Adar.
I wanted to use it so badly, to release the pressure building inside me. The need was suffocating, like a weight pressing down on my chest, begging for relief.
August just had to come find me tonight. I pricked my finger, leaving a trail of blood to entice him more, and yet— nothing .
It was like he knew how bad I needed to see him tonight. So he didn’t come.
I made my way home, jumping at every small sound in the woods that I heard before collapsing on my bed.
He placed a gentle kiss on my neck. “Come on. It’s getting dark. We shouldn’t be outside.”
“I need to go home.”
“You can stay with me tonight.”
He took my hand, leading me through the streets at a hurried pace. I giggled, breathless, as he glanced nervously at the darkening sky, more concerned about nightfall than I was. I wasn’t sure why—I’d never stayed out this late before. But he gave me attention, and that was enough. For weeks, I had tried to talk to him, only to be met with indifference. Yet tonight, he looked at me like I was the only person in the world. I couldn’t walk away—not when I finally had what I wanted.
We turned into a narrow alley, the walls closing in as shadows deepened with the fading light. Steps loomed ahead, leading to a dark green door adorned with a golden fox, its eyes gleaming as though it knew what was about to happen. My heart quickened as he opened the door, pulling me inside.
Once inside, he pushed me against the cold wall, the air thick and stifling. I closed my eyes, anticipation fluttering in my chest, but instead of a kiss, sharp pain exploded in my neck. The sting sent a shockwave through me, freezing me in place.
I struggled, my hands clawing at his chest, but his strength was unrelenting. The room seemed to spin as panic overtook me, my vision blurring as he laughed. I twisted, trying to break free, but his grip tightened, and I felt myself growing weaker with each second.
Just when I thought hope was gone, he released me. I stumbled toward the door, but before I could reach it, I was thrown across the room and slammed onto the bed. His weight pinned me down, his hands trapping mine above my head as his grin widened.
His once deep brown eyes that I had grown so fond of were now a searing, burning red. The warmth that had once made them familiar was gone, replaced by something inhuman, something predatory. His short, tousled hair fell slightly over his forehead, a deceptive echo of the man I used to know. He loomed over me, his breath shallow, his clothes—once neatly worn—now slightly disheveled, his shirt unbuttoned just enough to reveal the pale stretch of his collarbone, smeared with the remnants of fresh blood.
My blood.
Tears streamed down my face, hot and unending. “Please,” I choked out, my voice trembling. “Let me go. I won’t tell anyone. I promise.” The words felt fragile, like glass about to shatter under his gaze.
“You see.” He bit down on my arm, only taking a small amount of blood before bringing his face back to mine. “I don’t believe you.”
I shook my head but before I could say anything, he bit my other arm.
I kicked him with my legs but all he did was smile. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”
I kicked again, and he lowered himself as he pushed my dress up and bit my inner thigh.
“Stop!” I screamed but he came back up and kissed my cheek before biting my neck one more time.
I startled awake, my chest rising and falling in rapid, uneven breaths, as if I had just sprinted for miles. My skin was damp with sweat, my heart pounding so violently that it drowned out the silence of the room.
I knew sleep wouldn’t find me again, but I still rolled over, pulling the blanket up in search of comfort. That’s when I felt it—something wet against my skin. My brows knitted together as I reached down, fingers brushing against the damp patch on the bed. I lifted my hand to my face, but in the darkness, I couldn’t make out what it was.
With trembling hands, I fumbled for the candle beside my bed and struck a match. The flickering light illuminated my palm, and my breath caught in my throat. Blood.
A chill spread through my body as I inspected my arms, the candlelight revealing deep, bloodied marks marring my skin. Not just scratches, not mere cuts. No— bite marks.
My pulse roared in my ears. This—this can’t be real. I must still be asleep. Squeezing my eyes shut, I willed myself to wake up. But when I opened them again, nothing had changed. The blood was still there. The wounds still burned.
My breathing quickened as the mattress shifted beneath me. A slow, creeping dread curled around my spine. I wasn’t alone.
I turned my head, every muscle in my body locked with fear.
August.
He was lying beside me, his pale face serene, the candlelight kissing the blood smeared across his mouth.
A scream ripped from my throat as I threw myself off the bed, my heart slamming against my ribs.
August’s red eyes flashed open, confusion flickering across his face before a slow, twisted smile spread across his lips.
“You—” My voice faltered, my eyes darting toward the door just as Papa stormed into my room.
I gasped, looking down again—nothing. My bed was empty. My arms, smooth and unblemished.
“Winnie! What’s wrong?” Papa’s strong arms wrapped around me as he pulled me close.
“I—I just had a nightmare.” My voice was hollow, my eyes sweeping the room again. Nothing was out of place.
But I knew the truth. The nightmare had bled into reality. And with each passing hour, the line between the two was dissolving. Was it the magic coursing through my veins? Or would this torment continue until I finally ended his game?