Chapter 22
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
RYAN
A s expected, Jonah was playing like he was on fire. My plan to keep my bullshit out of his head was working. So, it was no wonder we won our game against Cornell. Next up was the finals and we were pretty sure we were playing Notre Dame.
After the game, we pulled Ace and Hopkins out for a press conference with Patterson. Mason was on his way to the Coyotes and Ace was surely going to get picked up by an NHL team next year when he was fully seasoned. Plus, the guy had more saves on goal tonight than any goaltender in the finals since 2005. He deserved some time in the limelight.
I watched from the side of the room as Mason handled the reporter’s questions with ease. The guy wasn’t just good at hockey, he was charismatic as hell when he wanted to be. My phone buzzed in the breast pocket of my blue suit, and I fished it out. Mom scrolled across the screen. I had to take it.
I slipped out the side door and into a hallway, then answered the call. “Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
“Hey, I heard you won tonight,” she said.
“We did. I was watching the press conference.” I strolled down the hallway, taking in the venue’s workers scurrying about in their blue uniforms, probably on their way to clean the place and ready it for the next game.
“Oh no, are you busy?” she asked. “I can call back another time.”
“No, it’s okay. What’s up? Did you have your scans?” I held my breath for a second. Mom’s health was more important than the championship right now.
“I did, but…”
“Tell me, Mom. What did the doctor say?” I tightened my jaw. Obviously, it wasn’t great news, or she’d be blurting it out.
“It’s not terrible, but I’ve decided to take the more aggressive treatment route,” she said. “So, I’ll be doing a combination of radiation and chemo to start, then follow it up with a stronger round of chemo.”
As my gut wound into a knot, I pinched the bridge of my nose. How soon could I get up there? “I’m not surprised. You went the aggressive route with the breast cancer too.” Though, I couldn’t blame her for removing all her breast tissue. She wasn’t one to fuck around with shit like that. “So, tell me more about the treatment. And don’t leave any of the gory details out.” It would be just like her to downplay it too.
“I start next week. It shouldn’t be too bad for the next month or so.” She sighed. “Once the radiation is done, it’s the second round of chemo that might get bad.”
Okay, so I had a month before I needed to be with her. Maybe I’d be here for Jonah’s graduation after all. “Mom, I need to tell you something.”
“What’s that?” She breathed in deeply, then in a low voice, she said, “I know what you’re going to say. I can handle this. Kathy said?—”
“I’m coming home.” I stood in the hallway, now empty, with my heart breaking. My life was completely up in the air. Jonah playing for the Leafs, me getting another coaching job, all of it. The only thing I was certain of was that I needed to be there for her. “Mom? ”
“I knew you were going to say that.” She scoffed. “Ryan, you can’t.”
“I can and I am. In fact, I’ve already put in my resignation.” I’d have to lay this on thick. “Laurent is pretty sure they’d take me back in the junior league and if that doesn’t pan out, then another coach here thinks he can get me in with the University of Toronto.” I gritted my teeth. “In fact, they have an opening and I’m going to interview.” Fuck, I was lying, but so what. I wasn’t going to tell her about Owen.
“Oh no, honey. What about your boyfriend, Jonah?”
“He has an invitation for the Leafs’ development camp, remember?” I fisted and opened my hand, then paced the hallway. “I’m sure he’ll get signed with the way he’s playing. It’s only a matter of time.” I forced a smile through my voice. “So, see, Mom? Toronto is where I need to be. I’ll have you and Jonah and Laurent and, and even Dad.” As my vision blurred, I fought to steady my voice. “Me coming to the desert was never meant to be.” My heart ached. Except it was how I found Jonah, the love of my life. God, if only all these dreams came true.
“I don’t know. It’s a shame this coaching job with ASU didn’t work out. What are they saying about it?”
“They’re happy to give me a glowing recommendation and with this championship under my belt, I’m sure to have more than a few opportunities back home.” I fucking hoped. I also wasn’t going to tell her I was using her cancer diagnosis as a crutch. Fuck, I felt like an asshole. But what choice did I have? I had to find a way out of this that didn’t destroy the team and our chances here. And I wasn’t going to let her face this alone, no matter how much she tried to dissuade me.
“Well, I hate to see you give up on that job so soon.” She huffed.
“Mom, I’m not just giving up on it. I’m coming home to help you and to be with my boyfriend. And there are opportunities for me there too.” I swiped wetness from my eyes. “It’s all a blessing, really. And now I’ll be there for you when you need me.”
“Shoot, okay.” She exhaled a long breath. “I can’t say I’m not happy to have you home again.”
“I know.” I turned and paced in the other direction, the tightness in my throat relaxing. “I’ll be moving back in with you for a while,” I said. “It’s for the best, Mom, so don’t try to talk me out of it.”
“What about your boyfriend?” she asked.
“I…” Shit, I hadn’t thought about that. I stopped pacing and touched the smooth wall surface next to me. “Let’s see how it goes, okay?” Would Jonah want to live with me and my mother? How weird would that be? “Listen, we’ll work it all out later. I have to get going.” All I had to do was get through this next game. Then I could talk to Jonah and explain everything. And I’d find out where his head was at.
“Okay, honey. I’ll keep you updated,” she said. “Love you.”
“Love you too, Mom.” I sucked in a ragged breath. “Bye.” I hung up the call and strode down the hallway. I needed to get to the bus. And I had to stay away from Jonah until after tomorrow’s game. He knew something was up with me, and I wasn’t great at keeping things from him. But for now, I had to.
The next day, Finley cornered me after breakfast in the hotel’s hallway by our rooms. “Hey, Gibson. I spoke to my buddy over in Toronto.” He sipped coffee from a paper cup.
“Yeah?” I glanced down the hallway, players coming in and out of their rooms in various states of dress. Everyone was pumped up for today’s game. The final game. I didn’t see Jonah anywhere.
“You’re in luck. Their current defensive coach is retiring this year and get this…” He leaned in close to me and tapped my ch est with his knuckles. “He’s heard of you and your stellar performance in the junior leagues.”
“Yeah?” My heart danced. Laurent was right. Maybe I was better than I gave myself credit for. Fighting off a grin, I said, “Okay, so?”
“So, he’s going to talk to their head coach and give you a call.” He raised his brows. “It’ll all work out for you, Gibson. I know it.”
“Thanks, Finley.” I patted his shoulder. “You’re a good guy. I’m sort of sad we didn’t hang out more.” Shit, I was leaving a class-A team.
“Yeah, well, I don’t go to gay bars.” With a snicker, he walked to his room and slipped out his keycard from the front pocket of his team sweats. “I gave him your number, hope that’s all right.”
“Hell yes.” The biggest smile I’d had in a week spread over my mouth. There was a glimmer of hope.
That evening, we fought like hell against Notre Dame. They came in big and hard and Ace had done more than his fare share, not letting any of their shots slip by him. But our guys had yet to score too, and here we were, third period with two minutes to go and we were looking at sudden death. I glanced at Finley, wincing.
My gaze cut to the ice. Jonah had taken a hit and was down, then popped back up and hustled to Notre Dame’s end zone, chasing after Hopkins and the puck.
“Go, Jonah. Get us a goal,” I muttered under my breath, my pulse racing. We were so close.
Finley glanced at me, a grimace on his face. “Your boy better get us out of this mess.”
Some of the players on the bench twisted their helmeted heads to look up at me.
None of them knew what was going on. They’d know soon enough. Cupping my hands around my mouth, I called out, “Get the puck in deep, Boehm!”
A smirk teased Finley’s lips.
I returned it with a grin, then fixated on the jumble of jerseys and sticks fighting for possession of the puck in the corner of Notre Dame’s D-zone. Jonah had been out there for a while. He needed to come in.
Hopkins took off, out of the fray, and wound the puck close to the crease.
Out of nowhere, Jonah flew from around the other side of the net.
Tapping the puck to Jonah, Hopkins skated forward, faking out the goalie.
Jonah slapped the puck at an angle, and it skirted around the goalie’s skate.
As the clock ticked down to zero, the horn blared through the arena and the red lamp ignited. The crowd all hopped up with a roar.
“Holy fuck, he did it!” I jumped and clapped, my heart soaring. This was it. We won the championship!
The guys at the bench leaped off it with slaps and hugs, all smiling and laughing, then piled over the boards and raced toward Jonah, who was caught in a maelstrom of slaps and bear hugs.
Notre Dame quietly left the ice with their heads hanging.
I took a big step to Finley and side-hugged him with a few slaps to his back. “Good game. The offense was on fire tonight.”
“Ace was on fire tonight.” Hitching up his navy slacks, Patterson strolled to us, a wide smile stretching across his face. “He’s going to get picked up this fall. You watch.” He patted me and Finley on the shoulders.
Hammett stepped to us. “Our defense killed it too.” He held out his fist to me. “Thanks to all the hard work you did with them over the last few months.”
Bumping my fist with his, I said, “I’m glad I could make a difference.” Fuck, I didn’t want to go. But at least I was leaving on a high note. For now.
After the press conference, which we had Jonah give along with Ace this time, we celebrated the win in the lobby bar of our hotel with beers and shots of tequila. I snuck away to leave Jonah to celebrate with his teammates for the last time while I headed into a small conference room with Patterson to talk.
He shut the door behind me, then motioned for me to take a chair at the square table in the room.
“No thanks. I’m too wound up to sit.” Pushing my suit jacket away, I planted my hands on my hips. I knew what he wanted to chat about.
“Okay.” He narrowed his eyes at me. “You’ve been a big part of our success this year.” He drew in a long exhale. “We’d probably have made it to the Frozen Four, but I don’t think we’d have won it without you.” He set his hand on the back of a chair. “Are you sure we can’t find a way to have you back next year?”
A knot formed in my gut. What if Mom was better this fall? Fuck no, there was Jonah to consider, and I wanted to be where he was. “I don’t think so. I’ve got my mom to think about and then how would we handle this thing with Owen?”
“It’d be old news by next year. Your affair with Jonah won’t hold as much weight with him gone and us winning the championship. I’m sure there’d be some sort of reprimand, but it would be mild.” He lifted his chin. “And quite frankly, if the asshole wants to start a scandal, let him. The season’s over.”
“Won’t it affect your ability to recruit for next year?” I’d feel awful if players decided not to come to ASU because of me. I tensed my jaw.
“Really, Gibson? We just won the championship. Who the fuck is going to turn down a chance to play for us now?” He smirked and patted my shoulder. “Can I give you a few days to think about it?”
I took a calming breath. Staying in this organization, especially after this win, was appealing. But no. I wanted to be where Jonah was. And I was sure he’d be in Toronto. “Thanks, but I’m going to hand in my resignation as soon as we get back. The official reason being my mom’s cancer.”
“Sure.” He held out his hand. “It was great having you.”
“Thank you.” I shook his hand, then left. It was time to talk to Jonah. As I walked down the hallway, I texted him.
Ryan
Hey, we need to talk. Are you still relatively sober?
I hated to pull him from his party, but this couldn’t wait. I strolled to the elevator and pressed the call button.
Jonah jogged to me, his team sweats hugging his body in all the right places, his dark bangs falling around his stunning blue eyes. “You looking for me?” He cracked a wide smile.
“I am.” I hated to ruin his mood. But with this news, we might be able to plan a future together. “You did a great job out there tonight.” I leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. It didn’t matter now who knew.
As the elevator door dinged and slid open, his eyes rounded. “You kissing me in public now, Coach?” He grabbed my elbow and led me into the elevator. “I’m totally on board with this.” He hit the button for our floor, then pinned me against the stainless-steel wall, lifting my arms over my head. “Fuck, I want you. Now.” Rocking his swelling cock against mine, he devoured my mouth in harsh kisses, his teeth scraping on mine, our tongues tangling.
As desire tingled in my dick, it plumped in my slacks. I ground against him, pleasure sparking up my spine. It felt like it had been forever. He had a way with kissing in elevators. I savored every second of it .
The elevator stopped and the doors swung open.
We both twisted our heads.
Ace stood there with a bottle of champagne in his hand. “I guess we won’t be seeing you two the rest of the night.” He cackled and stepped into the elevator. “Go, get out of here and fuck yourselves silly.” He dipped his head toward the hallway.
“Hell yeah.” Jonah snatched my hand and hauled me into the hallway, then to my room, because of course he’d scoped out where I was staying.
As I slid my keycard out of my breast pocket, I said, “Jonah, before we start something, we really need to talk.” I flung my door open and stepped inside. I couldn’t wait to get out of this suit.
“Okay.” He shut the door behind him and followed me in, the swagger of the win in his step.
Shucking my coat off, I said, “Go ahead and take a seat.” This was a sit-down conversation, after all. I hung my jacket off the chair by the desk, then worked my tie off and draped it over the jacket.
“You’re undressing for me, but you’re saying we need to talk.” He tilted his head. “Do you have any idea what that’s doing to me right now?” He curled the edge of his mouth.
I faced him with a shake of my head. “It’s not what it looks like.”
“Uh-huh.” He tongued the corner of his lips. “So, let’s get this talk over with. You know how horny I get after a win. And this was the biggest win of all.” He patted the bed next to him.
If I sat next to him, would we fool around instead of talk? “No, I’m going to stand for a moment.” I crossed my arms over my chest and gazed at the floor for a second, thinking. How the hell did I start this conversation? My face went slack.
He bumped off the bed to squeeze my forearm. “Ryan? What’s going on? You don’t look so good.” He stood up fully. “Is it your mom? Is the cancer worse than you thought?” He stepped closer .
Gazing into his gorgeous eyes, I said, “No, it’s Owen. I’m turning in my resignation on Monday.” My heart tripped in my chest. How was he going to take this? “He got letters through to the whole coaching staff. They all know about us.”
He stared at me for a beat, his jaw dropping, then his gaze grew hard. “No fucking way, Ryan. You are not letting that asshole win.” With his lips thinning over his teeth, he paced across the room and raked his fingers through his long bangs. “You can’t do this. It’s not right.” He stopped and glared at me. “Is your mom really sick?”
“What?” I blinked a few times. Did he really think I’d lie to him about that? “Of course she is.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” With a choked huff, he strode to me, then wrapped me up in a tight hug. “Fuck, Ryan, I’m so sorry.” He nuzzled my neck. “This is all my fault.”
“No, it’s not. I did this to myself.” Hooking my arms around his waist, I inhaled the scent of him, the fresh hotel soap on his skin, the hint of beer and tequila on his breath. “I need to go home anyway and help my mom. She needs a serious round of chemo in about a month.”
With a sniffle, he freed me and gazed into my eyes, his own eyes glistening. “But what’s going to happen to you?”
“I’m going to look for another coaching job in the Toronto area.” I grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it. “Jonah, it’s not completely terrible. Finley is hooking me up with an interview to coach at the University of Toronto and when Laurent was here, he swore my old league would take me back.” Was he starting to put the pieces together of what this really meant for us?
He swiped at his eye with his fingers. “But what’s going to happen? Aren’t you going to have the label of fucking around with a player pinned to your back? Is the school going to?—”
“No, Jonah.” The corners of my lips twitched with an almost smile. “The timing of this thing blew up in Owen’s face. The coaching staff didn’t want a scandal to hit the team right before the championship. So, I made a deal with Owen.”
“You what?” His gaze hardened again. “Did you talk to him?”
“I did.” With a nod, I rubbed my thumb over the back of his hand. “I had to, Jonah.” I pursed my lips. Doing all this behind his back wasn’t cool, but then, I’d had no other choice. “I had to meet up with him to discuss the situation.”
“Fuck.” With a scoff, he rubbed his forehead. “I wish you would have told me. I should have been with you for that.” He locked his gaze to mine. “The fucker is dangerous. What if he tried hurting you again?”
“He didn’t and it’s over. I didn’t want this shit hanging over your head and affecting your game.” I pulled him to me and wrapped my arms around his stiff shoulders, then kissed the side of his head. “I handled it, Jonah, and it’s done.” I couldn’t blame him for being upset. It was a sign of how much he loved me.
He slumped against my chest. “Yeah, okay. But what about your reputation?”
“It’s going to come out of this intact. The coaches are not going to report me, and Owen agreed not to take it any further if I resigned.” I pushed him far enough away to look into his face and held on to his shoulders. “The coaching staff will give me letters of recommendation and like I said, Coach Finley is setting me up with an interview. So, see? It’s all handled.” I gauged his reaction.
With his brows furrowing, he lifted his gaze to meet mine. “So, what’s next?”
My pulse quickened. Here it was. Would he want to commit to me enough to move to Canada? And what about the off chance he didn’t make the Maple Leafs team? “I’m going home, Jonah, and I want you to come with me.”
His eyes grew wide. “You mean…you mean you want me to live with you. In Toronto? With, with your mom, or what? ”
“Yes, that’s what I mean.” I rested my palm on his cheek and pressed a soft kiss on his lips. “I love you, Jonah, and I want you by my side. I want a life together.” He did want the same, right? “You have a chance to play for the Maple Leafs. How bad could it be?” The hint of a smile teased my lips.
“Holy shit.” He stared at me, then blinked. “I’m going to work my fucking ass off to make it happen.” A full-on smile swept over his mouth. “Goddamn, Ryan. This could be so awesome. You could meet my family at graduation, then we can move all your shit back to Toronto, and I’ll come help you with your mom.” He giggled. “I can’t wait to meet her.” He shoved me backward onto the bed, then landed on top of me, both of us bouncing. “You’ll become the best damn college hockey coach in all of Canada and I’ll be the best winger the Leafs have ever seen. I’ll score goals like it’s nobody’s business and we’ll beat the Coyotes in the Stanley Cup. Then I’ll chirp on Mason and Archer like they’ve never heard before.”
With a hearty laugh, I said, “I see you’ve got it all figured out.” My heart burst with warmth. “If you want, I’m sure I can arrange some special coaching for you with the best college hockey coach in Canada over the summer, to be sure your plan works.” Grabbing the back of his head, I pulled our lips together and kissed him deeply.
“I’m going to write that fucker Owen a thank-you card.” He brushed the tip of his nose on mine. “I was having the hardest time trying to figure out how this could work. But now, fuck, Ryan. Now, we have so much to look forward to.”