Chapter 20
Cai
“Can I borrow you for a moment?”
Elara looked up from the book she was reading to where I was standing in the doorway of the library.
“I believe it’s grammatically correct to ask if you may borrow me and not if you can.”
I pressed my lips into a line to keep from grinning. “Look at you, telling a king how to speak.”
“Well.” She shrugged. “If anyone ever was going to tell a king how to speak, you and I both know it would be me.”
“I suppose that’s true.” I stared at her for another moment, leaning my head against the doorframe.
“Care to join me for a stroll?”
She sighed, looking up as if she was deep in thought. “You know, I’d love to, but this book I’m reading suddenly just got very interesting.” She held it up for me to see.
“I thought you didn’t like to read?” I crossed my arms.
“You’re right. This book is terrible. I’ve read the same sentence twenty times now.” She tossed the book, and I chuckled as she climbed over the edge of the settee in a manner very unlike the queen she was.
With her arm linked in mine, I led her out to the gardens. My guards followed and I had to ask them to stay back to give me and the Queen of Everness some privacy. Elara’s expression changed at this request, but she remained quiet at my side.
The weather wasn’t exactly desirable. The sun remained hidden while the clouds covered the skyline in a blanket of grey. They gathered in the distance, accompanied by strong winds, foretelling a storm that was likely to arrive. Winter lurked around the corner.
We finally reached the ivy-covered wall, where I felt for the door. After I shoved it with my shoulder once or twice, it finally opened.
Elara took hold of my hand so that I could guide her inside, preventing the skirts of her dress tripping her over the tall grass and wildflowers.
“I see you still haven’t gotten a gardener in here.”
“It will definitely look a lot better once it’s cleaned up. I can’t decide if I should involve my mother in the process — the garden is her heart after all — or if I should surprise her.”
“Either way there is a lot of work to be done.”
I placed my hands on my hips as I took a look around. If I had any interest in horticulture I might have taken on the task myself. But I was likely to do more damage than good. “I do like being the only person who knows about it, though. I might keep it like that for a while.” A place I could go to be alone, to find a little peace amid all the chaos.
“One of the only two people,” Elara reminded me. She picked one of the flowers and twirled it between her fingers.
“So, are you going to tell me why you dragged me all the way out here, or is that a secret too?” Her mouth curved into a teasing smile.
Looking away, I scratched the back of my neck. “I figured it was time we talk about our situation.”
“Our situation?” Elara didn’t seem impressed by my choice of words.
“Well, yes?” I had thought she had wanted this discussion to take place for a while now.
She sighed. “All right, what do you want to discuss?”
The sky above grew darker, the smell of rain in the air.
I stated the obvious. “You need to marry me to strengthen your claim to the Evernean throne.”
“Yes?” Her tone was uncertain.
“And I need to marry you for soldiers to better protect my kingdom against Argon, if we should go to war.” There had been no discussion about the alliance since the last council meeting, and my noblemen would probably have my head if they knew what I was about to do.
She crossed her arms. “Are you proposing, Cai?”
“You didn’t let me finish.”
“Good, because if that is your idea of a proposal, I am really rethinking my choices.”
Where did she find the capability for humour at a time like this? My palms were sweating. I could feel my pulse in my throat.
“This alliance could have a negative impact on Norrandale if Everness is on the brink of a civil war. The same goes for Everness should Argon attack. Your kingdom isn’t the strongest it’s ever been and sending soldiers to Argon could sink Everness into greater poverty.”
“I suppose you’re right,” Elara confirmed.
“You have a knack for wanting to run away from everything and everyone all the time.”
“What?” She seemed more confused at the boldness of my statement rather than arguing against my words.
“And I give people the benefit of the doubt when I shouldn’t,” I admitted. “And you have very little experience of being a queen.”
Elara had a crease between her brows from frowning.
“Well, there is no need to twist the knife,” she said under her breath. A gust of wind, cold and intrusive, blew the surrounding fallen leaves into the air.
“I spend too much time away from home. You used to be a criminal. There’s been a lot of secrets and betrayal between us. Not to mention your family.”
“Is there a point to this or are you just making a list of reasons we shouldn’t be together? Because if that’s the case, you making a list in the first place should also be a part of it.”
She was annoyed, but I couldn’t stop myself now. “I have things that haunt me. We have lied to each other, verbally insulted each other, almost tried to kill each other.”
“Don’t forget you tied me to a tree.” She couldn’t help but bring it up.
“The truth is, neither of us really knows what we’re doing, and this could end in disaster.”
Elara’s expression stilled, and she bit her lip, knowing I was right but not wanting to acknowledge the truth.
“Our union could be the future for our people—” I sucked in a breath — “or the end of our kingdoms.”
She swallowed hard.
“But the truth is, none of those things matter because I’m completely and irrevocably in love with you, Elara.”
She met my eyes, and a raindrop fell onto her cheek. “What?” It wasn’t much more than a whisper. Her expression shifted from annoyance to surprise.
“I love you so hopelessly beyond my control. I loved you when you held a knife to my throat and when you came back for me during the rebellion. I loved you when I thought you were a princess and when I found out you were a bandit. I loved you when I believed you to be engaged to someone else, and I’ll probably still love you even if you don’t want anything to do with me.”
She tilted her head, face softening. “Cai.”
“I heard you,” I said, stepping closer and placing my hands on her cheeks as the rain began to pour. She didn’t move away, she only sucked in a breath.
“What?”
“I heard you the night you asked me to stay.” The night I almost died.
“I don’t understand, I . . . you—”
“You told me that I couldn’t leave. When death was knocking at the door, you pulled me back and begged me to stay. I came back because of you. I know I have a family and a kingdom that needs me, and while those things matter, it was your voice, Elara. Only you.”
She pressed her forehead to mine. I felt the locks of her hair against my skin. “You came back.”
“I came back.” I pressed a kiss to her head, which tasted of sweet rain, and she placed her hands around my wrists.
“If that’s what it takes to keep you, I would fight death again.” I wasn’t sure if she confessed it more to herself or to me.
“Maybe you and I are better off when we’re fighting together.” Under the dark clouds, raindrops fell from the heavens and washed the earth. “Will you marry me, Elara?” I said, softly, into the autumn storm.
She pulled back and looked up at me, her eyes wild with firelight once more. Her lips formed a smile.
I hovered my mouth next to her ear. “Marry me, Elara.”
Her hands were on my arms.
I pressed a kiss to her jaw.
“I’ll marry you, Cai,” she said, before kissing me.