11. Chapter 10
Chapter 10
The past was made of lies and half-truths. The future is uncertain. We stand on the precipice of it all, and fear is all I feel. We were not ready. Calyr’s prophecies were correct, and there stands a single possibility now. There is a single way to possible success, and now I know the true weight of my choices.
~Maeve Arden, The Future of Magic and Dragons
Maeve
The easy part is done. Casimir Cyrus sits in a chair in a perfect replica of his cell in the Keep of Steel. The Shade looks exhausted. Darian and Lee are both barely standing. The steel room is exactly what we need. It’s been inspected again since we came back to be sure that there weren’t any changes.
Casimir looks the same. A little less filthy after being carried several hundred miles through the air by Darian, but otherwise unchanged. Other than the black lines that weave their way over his face, of course.
His poisoned blood threatens him with death at any moment, but unlike the stupid Wyrdling that nearly killed her cousin, there’s no fear of losing control now. I nod to the three people in the room, and they leave.
A bowl of stew and a roll sit on the table, neither of which is even warm. It’s probably better than he’s used to, but it’s been three days since he’s eaten, since any of us have eaten.
I take a deep breath and, with peace flowing through me, I touch Casimir’s temples. The angry poison throbs in his mind, and I pull it out. It doesn’t flow as easily as stone. This poison wants to cause pain and suffering. Stone doesn’t care where it is, but poison craves pain.
Casimir shakes below me as I draw the black sludge out of his body, and the black lines that had covered his face disappear. The poison is as black as shadows, but it’s viscous like curdled milk. It sticks to my fingers, and the smell is near enough to a rotten and bloated animal.
When the last drop flows out of his temples, he slumps in the chair, finally relaxed. I immediately move to the door, and by the time the door shuts, he’s stirring. The poison falls to the ground outside the door, and I push it into the stone.
Everyone around, King Aric included, watches me. No one really understands the powers of the House of Earth. They aren’t as simple.
“Do I need to worry about someone stepping there?” King Aric asks.
I shake my head. “No, earth becomes earth. There’s nothing left of the poison now. It’s just as much a part of the walls as the mortar.”
Aric frowns, but I don’t explain any more than that. “Who would have interrogated Casimir?” I ask the three Immortals.
“Rhion or Gethin,” the Shade says without hesitation. “No one else would be allowed to speak to Casimir.”
Darian nods. “He was very confused when I showed up as Jasper.”
“Which one of you wants to play the part of Rhion or Gethin?” I ask the twins, and they glance at each other.
“I can be Rhion,” Darian says.
Lee shrugs. “It’s hard to pretend to be a male. Their brains don’t work the same as ours.”
I nod. It’s not surprising. “Darian, we don’t have any specific goals with Casimir. Just talk to him. Be… attentive. From what I remember about him, he likes to talk and rant. So let him rant. Don’t let him realize that you’re you, though.”
“You… want me to talk to him?” Darian asks. “Not torture him? Not try to get information out of him? He’s an Immortal, so it’s not like he won’t heal.”
I smile, not considering Cole’s thoughts at all. “The House of Flames does not bow to pain. They… embrace it.” The thoughts are strange. Like they’re coming from somewhere else. “What the House of Flames does not do well with is keeping secrets. They need to talk, to share. Casimir will know not to tell you anything, but he’ll be compelled to. The…” My mind doesn’t know where these thoughts are coming from.
Only the strongest shall wear the Crown. Only the strongest will be the tie to hold our magic to this world. Four sacrifices to save the many. Only they, of all the immortal Fae, shall fade in mind and body.
The words flash through my mind unbidden. A memory from the book that Vesta always read to me. But are they from the book? Or from somewhere else?
“Casimir will talk. It may take a while, but just sit with him. Talk to him about the weather. Tell him you prefer the House of Flames gambesons versus the chain mail of the House of Steel. Tell him whatever you want, but just talk to him. He’ll break faster like this than any other way. And then tell me what he says.”
Darian looks confused, but from the way the Shade is standing, I know that he’s in agreement. And the Shade would know better than any.
A flash of Cole’s face moves through my mind, and I shake my head. No. Not now. I have to stay focused, and every time I think of Cole, I feel myself falling apart. There’s no battle to throw myself into right now. There are too many decisions to be made.
And the Shade, Darian, and Lee aren’t making them.
I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Everyone’s eyes are on me, King Aric’s included, and I smile. “For now, though, let him wait. I don’t think he knows what happened. I doubt he’s ever been the recipient of Earth’s poison before. Tomorrow you can begin interrogating him.”
Darian nods. “Is there anything in particular you want me to push him to talk about?”
“How are he and Gethin planning to save Nyth after two Houses have been shattered? The longer I’ve worn this Crown, the more apparent it’s become that they had to have a plan for what to do after the wars. Even Gethin knows that the world is crumbling. At least Gethin had a plan, and we need to know what it is.”
I leave them in silence. There’s nothing else to say, and today, the Crown is weighing heavily on me. Everything inside me wants to escape their presence. The looks and expectations are more difficult to be around than in the past.
More than that, I know that I’m not ready to make all these decisions. I’m not a thousand year old Immortal like the Shade, Darian, or Lee. I’m twenty-three. I know that I’m the Queen, and it’s my responsibility to choose our course… but I don’t know if I have the experience to make the right choices.
I look down at my hands, and for a second I’m surprised that shadows aren’t pouring from my fingertips. While we were in Draenyth, I’d almost thought that I would be able to use them again.
I was wrong.
Maybe the Shade is right, and I don’t have any desire in me anymore. Maybe I’m too at peace. Maybe I’m too broken after everything. I know that’s what the Shade thinks.
My footsteps echo off the smooth limestone walls. They look like they’re from Draenyth, smooth walls made of liquid limestone, every type of gray imaginable. It’s as if someone had sucked the color out of a rainbow and turned it to stone.
My fingertips trace those stones, and my mind goes back to the Shade. I can’t seem to stop thinking about him. I instinctively locate him. He’s waiting in my room. For some reason, even with how tired he is, he shadow walked to wait for me.
I frown. Being all alone would be so wonderful. I want to sit in a room by myself and let my mind wander, with no one expecting anything of me. Then there’d be no need for conversation or decisions. Why can’t I have just one quiet evening?
I grit my teeth and continue to walk through the hallways. My mind can’t wander now. My focus is on the Shade.
Why does he keep pushing at me? Is it going to be like when we were in Draenyth together? Alone. A shiver runs through me, and I’m not sure whether it’s anger or desire flowing through my body.
My feet move faster, their steady drumbeat against the limestone is an ever quickening beat. I want to shadow walk to my room, but I can’t. Not anymore. Instead, I have to climb the stairs like a human.
Power of any sort is a double-edged blade. The wielder will always be cut just as her enemy is, but she has the opportunity to embrace the blade’s edge. There is no warrior that has not been wounded. Every action has a cost.
Another memory of words from Vesta. Words from that book of hers. Even though I’m trying to focus on the Shade, I can’t stop the memories that have flooded my mind for the past three days. Touching Casimir must have triggered something in me.
Or is it something different?
My head throbs, and I have to lean against the wall for a moment as a bout of dizziness hits me. That’s not normal. I’m Immortal. I shouldn’t have these moments of weakness.
Maybe I should talk to the Shade? Or someone? I don’t know. What would happen if I had a dizzy spell in the middle of a battle?
I need to do something, and now that Casimir is safe in his new prison cell, I think it might be the perfect time.
“What are you doing in my chambers?” I ask before the door is completely open.
King Aric gave all of us a set of chambers while we’re here. While we all said that we didn’t need a place to stay, he insisted. Probably smart of him. Keep your enemies close and all of that.
“Waiting for you, my Queen.” His voice sends a shiver through me when he talks like that. When he’s subservient and also so damned sure of himself.
“But what are you waiting for?”
The door is open all the way when I realize that there are shadows everywhere. Immediately, they embrace me, pulling me toward him. Slowly. Softly. Insistent, yet not forceful.
Every touch of those wisp-like tendrils of darkness pulls at something deeper inside me, something I’ve locked away.
“We were interrupted while in Draenyth, but now we won’t be.” He stares at me from under that hood, and I resist the shadows. Several of them move over my neck, the tips becoming razor sharp as he reminds me of what it felt like to have his nails on my skin.
I can’t help but remember the way I’d nearly let him pull me in with seduction. Just like he’d done the first time I’d met him. Except that this time, I know his tricks, and I know how much I enjoy him using them on me.
“That’s not the way the game is played,” I say. “You don’t come and seduce me. You…”
His shadows cling to me tighter, pressing against all the most sensitive parts of my body. “Offer you something that no one else can?” he whispers, his voice carrying in a way that no one else’s does.
“And what would that be?” I whisper back, not really believing that he has something I want.
The scent of revulsion shadows fills the air, and I look down to find the stone armor that I’ve been wearing is gone. I’m completely naked again, a dress of midnight fitting tight against me, and a gasp escapes my lips. His shadows sent my armor to the void, and he replaced them with this dress. “What are you doing?” I demand.
“I’m going to take you to the void, Maeve Arden,” he says. “I’m going to stay there until I can’t stand it any longer.”
I blink. “What?”
He nods to me. “A bargain. I know how much you’ve wished you could spend time in the void, and it will be exhausting for me. That means that there will be a price.”
I arch an eyebrow. “Beyond my clothes?”
“Yes. Beyond your clothes.” I feel a presence outside my mental landscape. A dark presence, full of salt and cedar. The Shade wants to enter my mind, to touch my soul. “I require entrance,” he whispers as he moves next to me. “I require access to the power inside you.”
The shadows disappear from my body, leaving me completely naked in front of him, and he runs a black-tinted nail down from my collarbone to my breast, slowly tracing the curve, yet never actually looking at it.
A tingling in my wrist makes me look down. The shadowy mark on my skin is moving more than normal. I look up at the Shade. “You could have asked for a debt,” I say. “And demanded entrance then.”
He stares at me for a moment before saying, “Yes, but then you could refuse, and I would not have you burn to death at my feet. Once I call in the debt, I cannot stop it. And, Maeve Arden, I worry about whether you have enough reasons to survive.”
He’s not wrong. But the void has called to me. Every time we’ve shadow walked, I’ve wanted to linger. I’ve wanted to feel that dark pressure pull the weight from my shoulders. It feels so soothing to be there, in the darkness of the void, with none of the stresses of this world. It’s freeing.
“Why did you stop coming to me, Shade?” I ask. “Why are you just now coming back to me? It’s been months.”
Something feels ridiculous about that statement, but I don’t know what it is. It’s like I should already know the answer to it, but I don’t.
“Because you refused me, Maeve,” he says. “You refused the Shadowed Crown.”
I run my finger over my forehead, remembering the way it’d looked to have the shadows over my head while I looked into the little pond that day. I shiver as the Shade glides around behind me. “Open your mind to me, Maeve Arden,” he whispers. “Do not make the same mistake twice by refusing.”
His shadow covered hands encircle my waist as he steps behind me, and this time, when he presses into my mind, I don’t resist. An image of us standing in my room fills my thoughts. Him behind me, covered in the linen of the Shadowed Cloak and me completely bare in front of him. An intricate black crown covers the Painted Crown, thin wisps of shadow form into a sparkling, shadowed tiara filled with stars that twinkle like diamonds.
“I don’t know how to be the Queen of Shadows,” I breathe.
“Trust me. Stop refusing me. Stop doubting. Give yourself to me without question.” My natural instincts war with the simplicity of what he demands. The Shade wants to use me. He wants to turn me into something that I’m not strong enough to be.
I’m already the Queen of Earth. How can I be both? And the Queen of Shadows can’t forget about the pain… and her past.
“I don’t know if I can do that,” I whisper. The image in my mind changes. The Shade moves his hand lower, his fingers pressing between my legs. His nails slowly move through the fine hair, leaving a tingling in their wake.
“You can. You’re stronger than you know, Maeve Arden. I’ve always said that. I’ve never hurt you, Maeve. I’ve never lied to you.”
Something about that statement is wrong, but I can’t remember. It’s not wrong, but it’s not right either. “Let’s go to the void now,” he whispers.
I nod.
And the shadows at our feet swallow us up.