28. Chapter 26
Chapter 26
The hardest thing a man can do is wait. Pain, exhaustion, and even death may be preferable, but I waited. By the gods and dragons, I waited, and of all the sacrifices I’ve made in my life, this is the one I’m most proud of.
~Cole Cyrus, A History of Flames
The Shade
I open my eyes to the clearing where I’d brought Maeve, tears streaking my face. The cold air bites at my skin, but I barely feel it. My gaze drops to the woman in my arms—the woman I would give anything to save—but there’s nothing I can do. I can't shield her from what’s tearing her apart inside. The agony of that single memory looked like it would only push her further into the void.
But she promised me she wouldn’t give in, and I have to trust her. I can’t give up on her.
A sliver of moonlight filters through the bare branches, barely enough to illuminate the world. How long was I lost in her mind? How long will she be trapped there now? A dusting of snow begins to fall, catching the faint glow of the moon and shimmering like ghostly embers. The first snowfall of the year.
I can’t bear this pain for her. I can’t protect her from it. All I can do is wait—but not here, not in this frozen meadow in the middle of nowhere. She deserves to wake up somewhere warm, somewhere safe.
Without hesitation, I scoop Maeve into my arms. She's so light it’s as if she’s barely tethered to this world. Shadows curl around me, and the clearing vanishes as I step into the void. When I emerge, I’m standing outside Darian and Lee’s chambers in Stormhaven looking like the Shade.
I promised Maeve I wouldn’t leave her, and I won't break that promise.
I knock on the door, and Darian opens it almost immediately. His hair is disheveled, his tunic half-buttoned, and his eyes widen in horror when he sees Maeve. “What happened?”
“Aerwyn is gone,” I say, my voice steady even as the words threaten to shatter me. “Her father, too. The Nothing swallowed it all. And Maeve… she shattered.”
Darian’s gaze shifts to Maeve, lingering on the Painted Crown, which is still glowing faintly on her brow. He doesn’t speak at first, just stares at her like she’s already gone. Maybe, if I hadn’t reached her in time, she would be.
“She’s going to be fine,” I say firmly, the words more for myself than for him. “I spoke to her. She’s going to heal herself.”
Darian shakes his head, his expression dark. “Cole, that doesn’t happen. A shattered mind and soul can’t be fixed. She’s…” His voice falters. “She’s not coming back.”
I grit my teeth, refusing to let those words take root. “She’s coming back,” I snap. “I won’t hear another word to the contrary. Maeve told me she would fix this. She still wears the Painted Crown, is Brenna Morvyn’s daughter, and is the last Queen of Earth. She will survive this.”
He doesn’t argue. He doesn’t even look at me. Instead, I notice the slightest shake of his head, slow and defeated.
I don’t have the patience for his doubt. Turning away, I say, “We’ll be in my quarters, Darian. Inform King Aric’s steward that we’ll be taking all our meals there. I won’t be leaving, and if anyone needs to see me, they can come to me there.”
Darian hesitates, then murmurs, “Cole…”
Shadows ripple from my hand, silencing him as they press against his mouth. My voice is cold steel as I say, “Not another word, Darian. You will not question our Queen. She is still our Queen.”
The shadows recede, and I leave without looking back, Maeve still cradled in my arms. My fingers trail along the mortarless stone walls as I walk. They're the only human walls that rival Draenyth's.
Maeve feels impossibly light, and I can’t stop the questions that circle in my mind like vultures. How is this happening? How could the strongest Immortal in the world come so close to death?
Now I understand why Immortals shield themselves from emotion. This incredible woman, this force of nature, could have died today—not by sword or spell, but by heartbreak.
That won't happen, though.
Maeve Arden will survive this. She will come back to me. She has to.
Because if she doesn’t, then I won’t survive it either.
Maeve lays silently in my bed. She looks so peaceful, as if she wasn’t fighting for her life behind those closed eyes.
“Do you have any news from Lee?” I ask Darian now that I’ve calmed down and he’s realized he shouldn’t say anything at all about Maeve. We’re seated across from each other in the small sitting room that I’ve decided will be where I’ll deal with anyone that needs to talk to me.
“Not much. She got into the Keep of Shadows, but none of the sylphs know where Vesta went. She hasn’t been seen since the Summer Solstice. The messages have been cryptic at best, passed via letter, so I didn’t expect anything concrete from them since they could be intercepted.”
It hasn’t been very long, so I’m not all that worried. I knew this wouldn’t be a simple task. “Whenever you get updates, please let me know. And my father?”
Darian sighs. “Your father has been… strange. He’s begun talking about you a lot. Now that he’s not being tortured like he was in the Keep of Steel, he's opening up more than I’d ever imagined he would. He keeps talking about your childhood, Cole. I think he regrets things.”
I huff. “Like what?”
“Like the way he refused to allow you to see your mother.” I’ve never asked him about my mother. I’ve always known that she was chosen purely because of her power to give birth to me. She probably did it to gain some favor or amount of wealth from my father.
I can’t care about a woman that willingly gave me up immediately after I was born. “Why would he regret that? I don’t even know her name.”
“Her name is Cora,” Darian says immediately. “She was banished from Draenyth to keep you and her from ever meeting. Your father didn’t want anyone else to taint your development with softness. He says that he needed you to be stronger than anyone else. But Cole?”
Darian pauses for a moment, his lips turning into a thin line before he continues. “He says that when he was young, Calyr told him it was the only way to save his House from complete destruction. He says that he’s been this hard on you because of that one meeting with Calyr.”
I pause, my body going cold. From what Maeve remembers from A History of Magic and Dragons , Calyr the Gold could follow the threads of the world and guess at what would happen in the future. If he predicted that the only way for the House of Flames to survive was if my father was this hard on me, I… wouldn’t blame my father for some things he’d done. There is always a price to pay, and if that is the truth, then we’ve both paid for it. Me with my pain, and my father with our relationship.
I’ve done terrible things in the name of saving the world. I’ve manipulated people and ruined their lives and even watched them choose death rather than do as I demand. What would I have done if I’d received his warning? Would I have tortured my only child?
I don’t know. Maybe? Maybe my father is stronger than I am because I don’t know if I could do the things he’s done.
At the same time, my father’s insistence on destroying my weaknesses has made me strong. It’s what has given me the strength to be the Shade. It’s what’s kept Maeve safe until now. I made my peace with my pain and scars, but I’ve never made peace with my father. I’ve never accepted that he was anything other than a cruel tyrant.
Maybe I need to now.
I look past Darian at the smooth limestone walls covered in a tapestry on the other side of the sitting room. “Maybe it’s time that we considered letting Casimir Cyrus know that we’re the ones holding him.”
“Really? He’ll want to control…”
“I didn’t say that we were releasing him. He’s still an enemy in my eyes, and as long as he’s in that steel cage, he doesn’t pose a risk to anyone. Keep doing what you’re doing, Darian. But soon, we may need to consider telling him the truth.” I glance at the closed door to my bedroom and finish, “But not until Maeve wakes up. I won’t leave these quarters until then.”
Darian looks at the door as well, and I can tell that he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. He swallows the words and nods to me before standing up. “I’ll push him harder, Cole. Something’s happening in your father’s mind. He’s changing. Anyone could see it. Maybe it’s that he’s giving up hope of escaping this, and he’s treating this all as his last confessions, or maybe it’s something else entirely. Something’s changing, and I don’t know what it is. I’ll keep you updated, but it might be good for you to see him.”
I shake my head. “He doesn’t matter as much as Maeve does, and I made a vow to her.”
Darian nods to me before walking out of the room, leaving me in silence. I stare at the wall, an ache in my chest as the last task for the day ends. I pick up the book that I requested from one of the footmen and go back to my bed where Maeve still lays.
I put the Shadowed Cloak on and sit with my head against the headboard before cracking open the book. A truly ridiculous sight, I’m sure, but I made a vow that the Shade would be there for her when she woke up.
My voice changes, becoming more gravelly. My nails sharpen and turn black. My fingers darken.
“Now, where were we? Oh right. Chapter five. Seraphina stepped out of her father’s…”
As I read the children’s tale, I glance over at her. She’s silent, as still as marble, and yet, I know that she’s fighting the greatest battle of her life. The battle between pain and a promise. A battle for each breath. Giving up would be so easy, and the hardest thing in the world is to keep going, to embrace the pain that her memories hold.
But I believe in her enough to wager everything on that battle, on her strength.
The House of Flames.
The world.
Myself.
So I’ll wait. I’ll lay beside her and read fairy tales to her in the hopes that my voice will bring her back to me just a little faster.