Chapter 15
CHAPTER 15
Pilar
“Someone is here to see you.” Amir’s voice made my eyes snap open.
I yawned. I must have dozed off at some point in the middle of writing my letter. Elias and Adeline asked me to write missives to children for the first day of school, which was coming up. “ Write something inspiring that’ll make them want to learn ,” they’d said. I’d always been a superb student, but I never needed outside inspiration to make that happen. I just did what I knew I was supposed to do, and getting good grades was one of those things. And now, at this point in my life, I still wasn’t sure how I felt about children in general, so this was an interesting exercise. I set the paper and pen aside and walked out of my room, eyeing Amir suspiciously.
“Who’s here to see me?”
“I am. I hope you don’t mind.”
My heart beat a little faster at the sound of Ben’s voice, and when I walked all the way into the foyer and saw him, I thought it would go into a frenzy. He was dressed casually in jeans and a white button-down, the sleeves rolled to the elbows. I’d never really thought much about arms. I’d always been a back girl, but Ben’s forearms were quite possibly the sexiest thing I’d ever seen on a man. And that was saying something, given the rest of him.
“I don’t mind at all.” I smiled, remembering myself, then looked at the bag he carried. “Did you bring food?”
“Wine, cheese, and ham.”
“That sounds wonderful.” I looked at the dining room, but it seemed too boring and formal. The kitchen could work, but the chefs were nosey and congregated there, and I’d rather not have an audience. Finally, I turned to my bedroom. It had ample space and a sitting area as well as a balcony—and memories of what we’d done there. I felt myself blush and pushed the thought away quickly. “Amir, will you have someone bring us plates, a bottle opener, and?—”
“Glasses,” he said. “I’m on it.”
A few minutes later, Amir walked in with those things and set them on the table before signaling to me that he’d be around. I thanked him and waved as he closed the door behind him. Ben stood by the window, looking out at the ocean beneath us.
“Do you want to open the doors?” I moved to do just that, but he took over and pushed them wide. He then moved the table a little closer to the balcony. I grinned. “Perfect.”
“I think so.” He smiled at me, and I got the feeling he wasn’t talking about the outside view.
We sat down, side by side. He opened the bottle of wine while I uncovered what he’d brought with him—cheeses, ham, jam, bread. Everything looked so good, my stomach began to rumble.
“I guess I was hungry, after all.” My cheeks warmed as I ate a slice of cheese.
“I’m always hungry.” He winked at me as he poured the wine.
“Thanks.”
“Cheers.” He raised his glass to mine. “To the unexpected.”
I clinked my glass to his and took a sip before setting it down. “What’s unexpected?”
“You.”
“And what about me is unexpected?” I raised an eyebrow.
“Absolutely everything, Princess.” He placed a hand over mine. “Unexpected, yet welcome.”
“Not so unexpected if you specifically asked for me to be your date at the gala.”
“Well, I’d like to think we were sort of friends before this summer.” He met my eyes. “But I’m not sure that friends share this much chemistry or have such an attraction to each other.”
“If they did, I imagine they’d become more than friends.”
“If they’re lucky.”
“Are you?”
“Lucky?” he asked. I nodded. He chuckled. “Right now, I feel like the luckiest man alive.”
“I feel pretty lucky, as well.”
He grinned at me and looked out at the ocean. “Do you like the freedom that being here brings?”
“I do.” I looked over at him. “Not as much as you do, I’m sure.”
“I’m not used to being in the spotlight.”
“I can’t say what it would be like to be away from it for too long. Even when the cameras aren’t flashing and the paparazzi aren’t chasing, we’re always putting on an act for someone.”
“Even during Sunday dinners?”
“Especially during Sunday dinners.” I laughed, shrugging. “I guess it depends on who’s there.”
“When I’m there, you’re always the perfect little host. Quiet and attentive. Who would have known that underneath it all, you’re such a naughty princess?”
I bit my lip as he came closer, brushing his nose against mine. “I’m only naughty when you’re around.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes.”
“I probably shouldn’t like hearing that as much as I do,” he murmured against me, nipping my lower lip and pulling it into his mouth. My body was on fire. I set my glass down and moved closer, wrapping my arms around him, wishing I could wrap myself around him completely. He moved his chair and welcomed me onto his lap, his fingers deftly pushing up the summer dress I wore. He found my center quickly.
“We should go inside,” I whisper-panted against his mouth, though my hips rocked, clearly not agreeing.
“Should we?”
“Yes.” I gasped as his fingers entered me.
“Should I stop?”
“God, no.” My head dropped back.
I didn’t want him to stop. Ever.
Ben and I had been inseparable. So much so, that Joslyn had been in town for two days and I hadn’t even seen her. So, when I walked into my room and saw her, I shrieked.
“Did you forget I was here?” She raised an eyebrow as she looked up at me.
“Honestly? Yes.” I took a deep breath as I lowered my hand from my pounding heart.
“Well, I haven’t wanted to bother you. I figured if you needed me, you’d call.” She smiled. “You look…happy.”
She was sitting in the comfortable leather recliner in the corner of my bedroom, and had been reading a newspaper like an old man. It was people like Joss who kept the newspaper industry going, so I never made fun of her for it, but she really did look funny with her reading glasses and paper.
“I am happy.” I sighed, opening my arms and letting myself fall smack into the middle of the plush, king-size bed.
“Do tell.” The paper crinkled, and the footrest of the leather chair clicked back into place.
“I don’t even know where to start.” I turned on my side so I could look at her.
“Well, you haven’t been back to the villa in two days now. Start there.”
“It’s been like a never-ending date.” I smiled widely.
“Are you going to share?”
“Well, I mean, you want details? I can’t give you all the details.”
“With the way you’re blushing, I want them, but I won’t ask because I don’t want you to hide from me for the next few days. I was getting bored here all alone.”
“I really like him.”
“Pilar.” There was a warning note in her tone.
“I know. I know.”
“We said fun. You’d have fun while you’re here. Sometimes, you don’t get to take the fun home.”
“I know.” I shut my eyes to that reality.
She wasn’t wrong. As wanted as Ben had made me feel, I knew this was temporary. It had to be. Now that I’d taken on more responsibilities with the Crown, anyone I dated would be put in the limelight, and from what I knew about Ben, that was the last thing he wanted.
“Imagine how it’ll be at your mother’s Sunday dinners if you don’t fully accept that it’s temporary,” she said.
“Yeah, you’re right.” I opened my eyes again. “But I also want to remind you that you were wrong about Elias and Adeline.”
“I was, wasn’t I?” She frowned slightly. “But that was because your brother stepped up and did something about it. He was in a position where he could. Ben…well, he’d have to want to settle down. Do you think he wants to settle down?”
“I’m not sure. He doesn’t seem opposed to it.” I gave her a small smile. “But I also don’t want to spring that on him. He likes to keep his private life private.” I shrugged.
“And that’s an impossible task with the Crown,” she said.
I nodded sadly.
“Well, let’s wait for him to decide what he wants.” She sighed. “Sometimes, love chooses for you.”
“Love?” I felt my eyes widen. “I don’t think he’s… I don’t think we’re…” I paused. “It’s too soon for love.”
“Love has no time restraints.” She shot me a look. “But I’m not going to encourage this. I’m not supposed to, and I won’t. I’m supposed to talk sense into you and tell you that it’s dumb, not tell you to be open to it.”
“Spoken like a true secretary of the Crown,” I said, though I meant it sarcastically.
I’d never second-guessed anything, but lately, I’d been doing that with every situation. I was beginning to dislike the idea that we had been brought to this Earth for one sole purpose, and that was to serve the Crown. I wanted to serve myself for once. I couldn’t even imagine how it was for Elias, who had the weight of so much responsibility on his shoulders—from the time he was born. The only thing I wanted was Ben, and every moment I spent with him, I only wanted him more and more. But the fact of who I was made it all seem pretty impossible.