27. “Little More （Royalty）” - Chris Brown
“Little More (Royalty)” - Chris Brown
Iforbid Henry’s words from haunting me. Unfortunately, they’re not good at following instructions. I hate that he’s right. If I’m just after power, what does that make me?
I refuse to let this be the legacy I leave. When future generations of students read about this period in their history textbooks, they will not read about a queen who sacrificed everything to maintain her power.
The question is, what can I do to prove to Henry that I don’t want to be that person?
The answer comes when I’m scanning my schedule for the day as Daphne finishes my hair and makeup. The opening of a new children’s farm in the southern part of the city is slotted for eleven o’clock. I’ll shake a few hands, pet a few animals, and let the photographers do their thing.
I just need to convince Henry to come along and bring Axel.
He answers after a few rings. “Hey,” he says, his voice breathless. I picture his hands on his hips, a sweaty towel draped around his neck.
“Hey.” Heat rises to my face as I picture what happened yesterday in his bed. That experience is going to become a permanent part of my dreams from now on. “Please tell me you’re free today.”
There’s a slight pause. “That depends.”
“On?”
“What kind of favor you’re about to ask.”
I’m momentarily distracted imagining which kinds he’d be open to. I shake those thoughts. “I’m attending the opening of a new children’s farm this morning. I was hoping you’d come too.”
“To a children’s farm?” He sounds skeptical.
“With Axel.”
“Just to clarify, you want me and Axel to come with you to a petting zoo.”
“Yes?” I say it like it’s still a question.
A long sigh floats through the phone. “Why?”
“What do you mean why? He’ll love it.”
“C, you haven’t cared before. Why now?”
“I do care. I’ve always cared.”
“Is this about yesterday?”
As if I need another reminder. I squeeze my thighs closer together in hopes they will stop tingling. “Of course not. Look, you asked to do some events in public with him, and I thought this might be one he’d actually enjoy.”
“Then why do I get the feeling you have an agenda?”
Needles of apprehension prick my spine. “I don’t. I just miss you.”
There’s silence on the other end. I picture Henry raking his hand through his hair. “So you want me to call Libby and say what? ‘My wife wants to borrow your son for a few hours’?”
Hearing him call her by her nickname still sends a bolt of pain through my abdomen, but I’m comforted that he says “your son” instead of “our son.” My brain hums with the words “my wife.”
“Do you mind?” I say.
He sighs again. “I guess not. Is she invited too, or just Axel?”
My muscles clench. I never considered inviting Elizabeth. She’ll ruin the vision I had for today, completely stomping all over the whole thing in her adorable little dress and sneakers that shout “I am the personification of a cool mum!” It’ll be an absolute nightmare.
“Sure!” I say, too brightly. There’s no way I’m fooling him with that.
Sure enough, he snorts. “Okay. I’ll see what she says.”
This will be good, I remind myself. The press will see that there’s no animosity between us, it will squelch any rumors that may be circulating about Henry and me, and it will hopefully prove to him that I’m willing to do what I can to save us—even spend time with his sickeningly perfect ex.
Henry and Axel arrive at the palace right before we are due to leave for the farm. I note the absence of Elizabeth with an overwhelming sense of joy that contributes to the enthusiastic kiss I leave on Henry’s cheek.
His hand slides around my waist as if by muscle memory, and I linger there as long as I dare. After a few seconds, I sense him growing uncomfortable, and I pull back.
I squat down next to Axel. “Are you excited to see the animals?”
Smiling, he pops that ever-present thumb into his mouth and nods before glancing up at Henry. Henry ruffles the kid’s hair and takes his hand to lead him to the limo.
“Elizabeth couldn’t make it?” I ask once we’re in the car.
He studies me for several seconds, creases forming at the edges of his eyes. “She has a closing to attend.”
“That’s too bad.”
“Like you’re not relieved,” he says under his breath.
“The more the merrier.” I shrug and smile at Axel, who is watching us with wide eyes. I’m trying, Henry.
The children’s farm boasts over thirty different animal species for families to visit. Other visitors have been limited to a small handful in order to decrease the amount of security needed.
The press is here too, of course, and even though I know this will provide some great footage, I’m a little annoyed by their presence. We won’t have even a modicum of privacy.
Axel votes we visit the goats first, so that’s the enclosure we head toward.
He walks solemnly beside Henry, clutching his hand tightly as PPOs and photographers surround us.
It must be terrifying to be thrust into the spotlight like this, and even though it’s his mother’s fault, I feel sorry for Axel.
It’s not like he’s had any say-so in the matter.
Elizabeth bloody Gable should have thought about what she was doing to her son before starting this whole drama.
Once we’re inside the enclosure, I get a handful of food from the machine and take it to Axel, who is staring at the goats with much less enthusiasm than before. “Do you want to feed them?” I ask.
He shakes his head and sticks his thumb into his mouth again. We’ll need to work on that, or else Elizabeth will have my head for allowing him to catch some animal-related disease.
“You sure? They’re nice, especially if you feed them.” I hold out my hand and show him the pellets.
This catches the attention of several nearby goats, and they immediately head toward me. I don’t typically consider myself scared of animals, but when three large goats start heading for me, looking at me like I’m going to be their next meal, I’m as terrified as the next girl.
I remind myself that Axel is watching, not to mention the cameras all around, and force myself to stand my ground. I hold the food out to the goats, and one of them scarfs it down before the others can get any.
“See?” I say to Axel when my palm has been licked clean. “That’s all there is to it.”
“Um, C?” Henry is standing next to Axel, his son’s small hand tucked inside his large one, but he’s looking at the animals now swarming me, all begging for a handout.
“What?” I push a particularly obnoxious goat off my shoes.
A smile spreads across Axel’s face. He pulls his thumb out of his mouth in order to point at me. “Look!”
I look around for the source of their entertainment. A huge white goat stands several feet away, a piece of yellow fabric hanging from its mouth. Glancing down at my lemon-colored blazer, I see a large section has been torn from the side.
“No!” I yell. “Bad goat!” I start to chase him or her across the paddock, then think better of it. The entire country does not need to be amused by the sight of their queen running after a goat.
I turn back to find Henry and Axel both bent over in laughter. “Glad you found that so humorous,” I say, heading for the hand-washing station.
By the time they join me, I have to admit it was slightly funny. My blazer won’t recover, but if that’s what it takes to put a smile on Axel’s face, bring it on.
We head to the geese next. Axel was attracted by their squabbling and general chaos, which can’t be a good sign. By the time we’re done, the boy again refusing to pet anything, my trousers are less “glacier white” and more “barnyard brown.”
Back on the asphalt path, Henry studies me, paying special attention to my mucked-up pants, destroyed jacket, and disgusting sneakers. “At what point did that outfit seem like a good idea?” There’s a twinkle in his eyes I’d have to be blind to miss. Is he flirting with me?
The thought sends a warm tingle through my veins. I slip out of the blazer and toss it into a nearby rubbish bin. I don’t miss the way his eyes linger on my bare shoulders. “Good ideas are overrated.” I swoop up Axel’s free hand. “Where to next, buddy?”
I can feel Henry’s gaze on me as we head to the miniature ponies. The weight of his attention feels heavier than that of any of the cameras following us. I lean down to whisper to Axel, “Race you there.”
He offers me an open-mouthed smile and drops Henry’s hand. We sprint toward the ponies and arrive in a mad dash of giggles. When Henry joins us, the grin on his face is worth everything.
A guide inside the pony enclosure helps Axel into one of the saddles. Henry and I watch from the wall as they walk circles around the pen.
“You’re good with him,” he says.
I look up, waiting for the barb. He returns my gaze, a faint smile hiding in the corners of his eyes.
“Thank you,” I say, meaning it. His sincerity is like a cool breeze on a hot day.
He turns his attention back to Axel, but I can’t tear my eyes from him. The sun is hitting his face just right, throwing that ridiculous jawline into even deeper shadow. I want to run my tongue over it, feel the stubble of the five o’clock shadow he always has these days.
His arm is perched along the wall behind us, and I take a tiny step closer, just enough to be inside its embrace. After a few more minutes, I find the courage to place my head against his shoulder. I wave as Axel makes another loop on his pony, then rest my fingertips on Henry’s stomach.
His muscles tighten beneath my hand. “What are you doing?” he says quietly.
I pretend not to hear him and nod at Axel. “Look at him, actually smiling. He’s a natural on that horse.”
A few seconds later, Axel decides he’s had enough and tries to lurch off the side of the pony. The guide manages to grab him in time, but Henry and I both rush over.
“Hey, buddy,” Henry says. “Go a little slower next time, okay?”