14. A Tawdry Affair
14
A Tawdry Affair
Annalise
Music and ambient chatter add to the chaos going on inside my head as my maidens and I weave our way through the crowded ballroom. There are the usual elaborate decorations and beautiful gowns to gawk at, but somehow, it all just seems dull and lifeless.
I hardly slept last night, so it’s possible I’m just cranky and in a bit of a funk, but I’d just love for this to be over. The one and only bright spot is that my aunt and uncle aren’t here. I feel a slight inkling of joy knowing Aunt Geneva is likely crying into her pillow having to miss one of the grandest annual celebrations here in New Eden. Granted, she and Uncle Mitch are still living comfortably even on house arrest—Cas’s stipends make that a given—but the one thing money can’t replace is being able to brag to her friends that she attended such a regal gala.
However, moving forward, her name will never be on one of high society’s coveted guestlists ever again.
And the satisfaction I feel because of this fact is indescribable.
The orchestra keys up a new song, and I forget to be cautious about where my eyes land. So, when I peer up, I unfortunately lock gazes with Cas. He’s supposed to be schmoozing the group of powerful men encircled around him, but when his mouth falls slack, I can guess he’s suddenly forgotten his words. I look away quickly before he can misread the glance for an invitation to cross the room to speak. I’ve avoided him the past two days for a reason, and I intend to keep my streak.
“Oh!” Tabitha squeals, providing a much-needed distraction as she points toward the door. “That’s Piper Huxley! I swear to you, I’ve seen every single one of her films.”
I recognize the A-lister right away, and it’s strange to have gotten used to celebrities frequenting the estate, but it’s certainly the norm.
“Isn’t she beautiful!” Tabitha says in that same high-pitched tone. “I mean, just look at her dress! There have to be at least a thousand crystals sown into it. Don’t you think?”
The dress is certainly exquisite, but given my mood, I have to force myself to match Tabitha’s enthusiasm.
“She looks gorgeous,” I say, and she seems to buy the fake tone I put on for her benefit only.
“I’m gonna go talk to her. Should I go talk to her?” she rambles. “I mean, if that’s all right with you.”
I wave her off. “Of course it is. Here, take this. She’ll need something to autograph.”
Tabitha accepts the embroidered handkerchief I remove from where I kept it discreetly tucked inside the top of my corset. She accepts the piece of fabric, then squeezes me in a tight hug before bounding across the room to check ‘Meet Piper Huxley’ off her bucket list.
“Guess it’s just you and me,” I say to Guinevere with a laugh.
“Well, us and the squad of security guards trailing behind us,” she adds. By today being such a well-attended event, Cas must’ve insisted that more guards be assigned to look after me. If I weren’t angry with him, I’d probably find his protectiveness sweet, but considering where we currently stand, I’m only annoyed.
The lights dim three times, and a hush falls over the crowd. Within seconds, the room is completely silent, and my stomach twists in knots. Guinevere seems to sense my nerves, and she loops her arm through mine. Surprisingly, Tabitha cuts her time short with Piper Huxley to return to my side, gripping the arm Guinivere isn’t already clutching.
They know like I know.
It’s time.
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,” Lady Radcliffe says, standing beneath the spotlight as she holds a microphone in the center of the room. “As you all know, this year’s Spring Ball is special in that we’ve also been invited to witness history in the making.”
The crowd applauds, forcing Lady Radcliffe to pause until things settle down.
“A group of very special, and very lucky, ladies have been chosen as potential mates for Alpha Caspian. Tonight, he will select three women to join Ms. Breedlove, our newly appointed Alpha Regent, in a union that is sure to withstand the test of time.”
There’s more applause, and the sound explodes when Cas emerges from the crowd, escorted by his men as he joins Lady Radcliffe in the center of the room. That sensation of suffocating is back, and I can’t seem to steady my breathing.
“Now, without further ado, please welcome Ms. Dawson, and the alpha’s lovely prospects.”
The orchestra begins to play an upbeat tune, and it’s a stark contradiction to the turmoil I feel on the inside. Whereas I’d fiercely avoided Cas before, I can’t take my eyes off him now, watching to see how he’ll react when the women are brought out. I’m aware of the large, double doors on the other side of the ballroom slowly being drawn open, but all I see is him. The man I once hated and resented for bringing me here against my will. The man I now can’t stand the thought of sharing.
The crowd gasps, making a theatrical fuss over the seven women I met the night before, and my gaze flits toward them. They were beautiful yesterday evening, but now, they’re like living dolls—elaborate hairstyles, makeup, and ballgowns that put everyone else to shame. They practically float across the room with their fake, plastered smiles as they greet the guests. Lady Dawson’s parade stops directly in front of Cas, and I glare at him, feeling the heat of a million suns at my back as my wolf and I contemplate murder.
His murder.
My rage is fueled by chatter floating among the crowd.
“They’re all so gorgeous! How will he ever choose just three?”
“The alpha is a lucky, lucky man.”
“I wonder which will become his favorite.”
And at their words, I’ve reached my breaking point.
“Excuse me for a moment. I need to powder my nose,” I whisper to my maidens, but the looks of concern on their faces tells me they’re not quite believing this lie. Still, I fake a smile, and back away slowly, turning when I need to pick up the pace.
I’m certain at least half my guards are trailing me, and when my fast walk becomes a slow, and then steady, run, I’m causing quite the scene.
But it can’t be helped.
My options are either to flee and make the guests suspect I’m a madwoman. Or lose my shit right here in front of everyone and prove their suspicion right.
It feels like it takes me forever to reach the exit to the ballroom, and I burst through the doors and into the mostly empty foyer. The few guests still lingering there cast their gazes toward me, and I can only imagine what they see.
My red, watery eyes. My frantic breathing as I grip both sides of my dress to keep from tripping over the hem as I race to some unknown destination. All I know is I can’t be here. I can’t stand here and watch the man that I… the man that I…
Hell, I don’t know what I feel at this point. I just need to be alone.
I find solace behind the closed door of the pink drawing room, where I effectively lock my guards out, so I can think and catch my breath. My forehead falls against the door. A swell of emotions has the tears that pooled in my eyes spilling over now. I care very little for how I’m likely ruining my makeup, because a face covered in mascara-streaked tears is the least of my worries.
The alpha… my alpha… is in that room, standing before the gods and everyone else… quite literally breaking my heart.
Get yourself together, Annalise. You knew this day was coming. You knew you wouldn’t be the only one. What he claims to feel for you isn’t real and it never has been. Damn you for believing it was.
My thoughts are sobering, and my breath settles a little as I realize this is all my fault. I knew better than to fall for him.
The sound of footsteps on the other side of the door has me reaching inside my dress for my handkerchief, only to promptly remember having given it to Tabitha. The steps draw closer, and I know there’s no hiding that I’m upset, but it wouldn’t be the first time my maidens have seen me cry.
A soft knock hits the door, and I dab my eyes with the backs of my hands before I grab the knob, preparing to let Guinevere and Tabitha in to join me in misery. But then I hear it. A voice on the other side of the threshold. A voice too deep to belong to one of the girls.
“Is she in here?” Cas asks, and my heart drops as the guards confirm. When I stormed off, he’d just been in the middle of selecting his other mates, but now… he’s here.
I try to imagine what everyone must be thinking. The entire clan is watching, either in person or over the broadcast, so Lady Radcliffe and the media are likely scrambling for a quick cover. I hate that my next thought is of how angry he must be with me for causing such a scene. I’ve been reminded more times than I can count that tonight isn’t about me, but about the alpha and his new mates. However, I’m sure my exit shifted everyone’s focus.
Shit.
There’s another knock, and my heart hammers twice as hard at the sound of it.
“Annalise, open the door,” he says with an added, “Please,” that leaves me confused.
He doesn’t sound angry, but that doesn’t make sense. If he hasn’t chased me down to scold me for embarrassing him and interrupting the evening… what other reason could there be?