Chapter 7 – ANNA
7
ANNA
M om and Dad sat at the head and foot of the table. Her in white linen. Him in his usual black suit. Like a pair of decorative salt and pepper shakers.
Across from me, Steve Draven took a long swallow from his glass of Malbec.
“So, how was your time in Africa?” he asked casually.
I put my fork down on my plate and dabbed the sides of my mouth with my napkin before peering over at him.
“Life-changing,” I replied obsequiously, feeling the frost of my father’s gaze on me from the seat at the head of the table. I quickly added more detail to my answer. “I’m so glad that I got to see more of the world, but I’m grateful to be home again.”
“Hudson, you’re very involved in charity, aren’t you?” Steve asked. He was a state senator, and I doubted Dad had paid him much attention before. He probably only chose him because he was single, under forty, and attractive enough to look good cheering Dad on from behind a presidential podium.
The poor guy didn’t seem to realize that his job here was to seduce me, not suck up to the governor.
Dad cocked his head toward Mom. “Michelle takes the lead on charity work in the family.”
“Yes, you’re probably too busy with work, Hudson,” Steve replied. “I know getting the state budget approved was a nightmare.”
Nobody saw me roll my eyes. If there was one thing that got Dad talking, it was budget cuts and whether or not he personally approved of them.
My mother was silently eating her swordfish steak, laughing and gesticulating at the appropriate times to cast my father and me in the most flattering light. His perfect performer.
It made me sick to think that I could be her in just a few years.
…if I let this happen.
Sorry, Rosie. I agreed to dress up, but that was where my promises ended.
I put my fork down and interrupted.
“You know, Steve, there’s something you should know about Malawi.”
“ Anna ,” my father warned, but I could already feel it. The manic urge to scream rose in my throat. Or maybe that was just bile. And I was doing so well, too.
Doing everything just right, like I was taught.
There was only one problem, the Anna Vaughn that left this house six years ago and the one sitting here now, were not the same person anymore.
I couldn’t do this.
Even if it meant kissing the security I desperately needed right now goodbye.
If he wanted me to dress a certain way and say certain things while I lived under his roof, then I could do that. I could play the part of the daughter of a future president at parties, when he had company, when I got my Starbucks in town. But I wasn’t going to shape the rest of my life in his image. I’d rather choke to death on this stupidly delicious swordfish right here and now.
My pulse raced and my fingertips tingled. I folded them on the table in front of my plate and gave Steve my best smile.
“I never went, actually,” I said sweetly. “That’s just what we’re telling people, for obvious reasons. The truth is, after high school, I became a waitress at what is essentially a high-end titty bar, had a string of bad boyfriends, then came back.”
The sound of my mother’s knife clanging against her plate rang through the silence. I looked up. My father cleared his throat, choking out an awkward laugh.
“So…you weren’t building sustainable housing,” Steve said, his words full of jest, like he was on my side and was as desperate as my parents were for me to say ‘just kidding.’
“I’m afraid not. Didn’t so much as pick up a hammer. I can’t take credit for something I never did. If anything, I lost the last six years to bad decisions, and I’ll never get them back. If you and I are going to get engaged, you should probably know all the details.”
“Engaged?” Steven echoed. He sounded like he’d just swallowed a fly.
“That’s why you were invited,” I explained, while Dad’s face got redder and redder. “Dad doesn’t intend to do anything to help your political career. Not if you don’t put a ring on it. But I’m guessing a smart guy like you realizes that I’m as much a liability as I am an asset.”
I pushed my seat back and stood.
“ Anna. Sit down ,” my father hissed through clenched teeth. My mom looked like she was going to pass out. I clenched my fists, meeting my dad’s eyes. He was braced in his seat, holding himself back.
“Please excuse me. I’ve lost my appetite.”
I smiled politely at Steve and walked out of the dining room. My heart thrummed almost painfully. I didn’t go upstairs. I went to the great room and slid the doors open to the patio. The brisk sea breeze filled my lungs, immediately invigorating me. I walked over the lawn, and down to the beach, ignoring my father’s roaring voice fighting against the wind for me to return this instant.
He wouldn’t chase me. He was too proud for that.
Instead, he’d have to figure out some way to convince Steve to keep his mouth shut. Maybe our dinner would be good for Steve’s political career after all if the guy had enough balls to reach out and take the low hanging fruit I left for him.
I kicked my shoes off, leaving them behind me to sink my feet into the sand. The beach felt like freedom. The sound of the ocean and the clean, crisp air whispered that I was okay. I’d be okay. Even if dad kicked me out after what I’d just done.
Unconsciously, I wandered down the wide strip of beach, wrapping my arms around myself to stave off the chill of the wind and what waited for me when I eventually returned.
If Hudson Vaughn didn’t already combust from the rage, I’d get an earful when I got back. I was ready this time. I wasn’t a kid anymore. He scared me, but I’d faced down scarier men now.
Plodding through the sand, I kicked my feet, wondering how I managed to live away from the ocean for so long. Staring at boats chugging along the Mississippi River just didn’t do it for me. I walked down to the water line and let the water wash over my feet, sucking in a breath at the chill.
I ached to go further down the beach. Another half mile and I’d be at that invisible line between luxury and squalor. Right at the spot where Carter and I…
Before I knew it, I was already halfway there, walking until my feet were numb with cold in the water. Until I was here .
The houses up the sloping sand away to my right looked a little different. Larger than I remembered. Perhaps remodeled or rebuilt, but this was definitely the place.
I turned to the water, hating how my throat ached as I stared out over the silver capped waves and tried not to think of all the other times I’d come here. Tried not to think of him .
“Do you know how many times I came out here hoping I’d see you?”
I screamed, stumbling toward the water. He hurried over to me to help me up, and I swatted his reaching arms away, flailing to get my footing.
“What are you doing here?” I demanded.
He drew up to his full height, nothing more than a black silhouette against the blinding light of the setting sun, but I knew it was him. I knew his voice just as my body knew the pull of his nearness.
“I live here.”