Chapter 5 Colby #2
It’s different of course, but still. With her attention firmly on every tiny movement I make, I know I’m the prey in this scenario, and I doubt that’s ever going to change.
The tense moment is broken by Duffy’s laughter. It startles me, but Rory doesn’t move an inch.
“What are you laughing at?” I mutter at him, only moving my eyes in his direction.
“I’ve heard her tell about a thousand dudes she doesn’t want to hurt them, but I think this is the first time she means it.”
The implications of that are . . . well, they’re obvious. What would a psychopath who’s part of the mob do other than hurt dudes? It’s still fucking startling.
“Fuck, you really are insane,” I keep muttering. “If you’re trying to make me feel better . . .” I pause to look into Rory’s eyes again, then turn to watch the same eyes but so, so different. There’s laughter and warmth, and yes a little crazy, in Duffy’s. “You’re failing miserably.”
“Okay.” Quick as a cat, Rory moves back, grabs the chair, and drags it over so it’s right by my bed. “What can I say that will make you feel better?”
“I can tell when you’re trying to fake being normal, so stopping that is a good first step.”
“You got it.” She nods once and sits back, looking almost relaxed. I doubt she ever truly relaxes, though. She’s a true predator. “What else?”
I try to think of something else, but I can’t, so I show my hand with one simple question.
“Are you ever going to let Maggie and me go?”
The way she tilts her head, assessing, is another of those animal-like moves of hers that it’s going to take me a long time to get used to.
“We don’t make any choices here, Colby,” Duffy answers. “We follow orders.”
“Why?” I can’t help but ask, desperate now, because the fact that he didn’t answer my question feels like a death sentence. “Why do you follow his orders?”
“He’s our family,” he says, as if it were that simple.
“Do you mind?” Rory asks, and when I turn to look at her, I see her aiming a significant look at Duffy.
“No, I don’t. He should know.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I demand, and there’s that incessant need to know everything.
“I’m gonna tell you all about Eian in a minute, but I think the best way to make you understand why is to tell you where Duffy and I come from.”
Her curt words put me on edge, and my sensitive stomach does not appreciate that. I shift in my seat and nod once to let her know I’m listening, though I doubt I’m truly prepared.
“Our mother abused me for the first ten years of my life, at least as far as I can remember.” That . . . is not what I was expecting. “When I was ten, I killed her after cutting off the hand she used to hit me, to rape me.”
The nausea wins.
There’s no chance of stopping the bile that surges up my throat. I vomit all over my sheets, my hand doing nothing to stop the disgusting flow of pure bile.
“Shit,” I hear Duffy hiss.
Rory moves fast, taking the sheet off me and throwing it in the direction of the room’s bathroom, then she gets toilet paper and cleans up my face and hands.
Duffy gets out of his bed with his sheet in hand, and dragging his IV stand over, just shoves me lightly, then sits right by me and covers us both.
“It’s hard to hear, I know,” he whispers. I freeze when he throws an arm around my shoulder and pulls me into what I’m guessing he wants to be a comforting hug.
Nothing could comfort me right now. I called Rory crazy, and Duffy—
“Most of the psychiatrists Ronan took me to thought that was probably why I am the way I am. Our father was . . . less bad. In some ways he was worse, though,” Rory continues as she passes me a container of some sort.
I guess it’s in case I need to vomit again?
I don’t have anything left in me to vomit, and right now it feels like I’ll never have an appetite again.
“He came home that day and found her body in the back yard, where Duffy had helped me put her. He didn’t say anything.”
“What?” The question comes out in a shocked whisper.
“I know,” Duffy huffs.
“He knew, of course. He knew what she did to me.” Rory keeps talking as if we hadn’t interrupted her. “He mostly didn’t pay me any mind after that day, and just focused on Duffy.”
The fact that she sucks in a deep breath, as if whatever’s next is something even she has to brace herself for, is terrifying. The rage brimming in her eyes then is real enough that I can practically feel it in my eyeballs.
“He started chaining him to the wall in the basement, and wouldn’t let us see each other for days sometimes.”
“He played sick fucking mind games,” Duffy growls.
“I knew Duffy was suffering, but I couldn’t do anything.
He knew to keep all the knives, anything sharp, anything I could use as a weapon hidden, and I couldn’t ever break the chains when he was away.
” She sounds almost annoyed at that. “And he was stronger than me.” That time she definitely sounds annoyed.
“Eventually he started . . . negotiating.”
“Negotiating what?” I can’t help but ask, indignant beyond anything I’ve ever felt.
“If I did things around the house, he’d let Duffy sleep in his bed, or let me take him down some food.”
“Motherfucker,” I spit out.
“Don’t worry, Colby. I killed him,” Duffy says, squeezing my shoulder while smiling reassuringly down at me.
“Yo-you did?” I hate that I stutter.
“Yeah, but I’ll tell you about that in a bit.”
“Yes, that part of the story is almost here.” Rory nods, almost sagely. It’s weird, but I think I’m grateful she can only really feel anger. I’m grateful she survived and outlived those monsters.
That’s fucking dark.
It’s definitely a new perspective.
“One day, when I was thirteen, he told me he would beat Duffy to death if I didn’t do as he said, and he took me out.
I didn’t know what he did for work, but that day I found out.
He was in charge of one of the brothels, and he took me there.
” She pauses again and sucks in another deep breath.
“To work off a debt.” She speaks quickly now, like the words can’t come out fast enough.
“I don’t know why, but Eian came by that day and he found out about it.
He also cut off my father’s hand, which I think is poetic really.
Then he got the man who was raping me off me, and took me home because I wouldn’t have it otherwise.
I needed to get to Duffy, and Eian did that for me. ”
Her gaze focuses back on me then, like she’s surfacing into this plane of existence again.
“He freed me and Duffy, and then brought us to Ronan. That’s the day we met our real Da, and though we only had him for a few years, I can tell you Ronan Dempsey was more of a father to us in that time than that fucker Jimmy could ever have dreamed of being.”
I keep a level gaze on her even after she’s done. I feel like I owe it to her—the whole fucking world owes it to her.
“They had Jimmy and the other fucker—I forget his name.” Duffy picks up the storytelling without wasting a second.
“Anyway, they had both of them tied up in the bunker, and I’d asked Eian if I could be the one to kill Jimmy when he got those chains off me.
Ronan liked that idea apparently, because only a little while after they went away, Eian came back to the room he’d put us in and told me to go with him.
But Rory here wanted a piece of him too, so we both went in there, and Eian taught us how to deal with them while Ronan watched. ”
“I remember,” Rory says, and it strikes me how in sync they are, telling the story together.
“Eian asked me how much pain I thought that other guy deserved. I told him I didn’t care, and he said that I should care.
That people who take advantage, who make innocents suffer, deserve to suffer ten times more.
He told us that was the job of the Dempseys, and we had to learn how to be the worst monster in the room. ”
“And after a few hours, I finally got to kill Jimmy,” Duffy finishes like it’s the end of a kids storybook or some shit, his voice almost sounding like a song.
“So you see?” Rory asks me. “We followed Ronan’s orders and now we follow Eian’s, because they’re the only ones who care about and avenge all the people who no one else cares about.
” She leans in, rests her elbows on her knees, and clasps her hands.
“As long as you don’t fuck us over and don’t hurt innocents, Eian’s never going to hurt you.
In fact, he’ll even take care of you, and there’s no scenario where he’ll hurt your little girl, Colby.
I don’t know if he’ll ever let you go.” She whispers that last part, and though I told her she didn’t have to pretend with me, I’m still grateful that she does when the next words come out of her mouth.
“But you can have a good life with us, Colby. As far as we’re concerned, you’re already part of the family. ”
And family is forever.
Yay me.