Chapter 11 – Sebastian
SEBASTIAN
The air leaves my lungs in a rush as I struggle to comprehend her words. My gaze flickers to Rowan, who has gone pale with shock. “What are you talking about?” I manage to choke out, feeling the ground beneath me shift.
“Her name was Elara,” my mother continues, her voice sharp with derision. “She was quite the seductress. She…ensnared your father, and when he ended it, she kidnapped Desta as revenge.”
The room goes deathly still, this news the ultimate sucker punch. Althea looks as if she’s been slapped, her eyes wide with disbelief.
“You knew?” the words slip past Rowan’s lips, and I find myself shooting out of my seat and marching over to the bar. I pour a round of drinks without bothering to check what anyone wants or even acknowledging that it’s not even noon.
“Yes, I knew. She was one of the house servants and she certainly wasn’t the first. Just the one who grew the most attached.”
I bring over the tray of drinks and Rowan and Althea immediately go for theirs.
“Mother, how could you have known all this time and never said or done anything about it?” Rowan demands, his voice shaky with anger.
“Who says I didn’t do anything about it?” she snaps, her eyes narrowing. “I am the only one who kept this family going. I am the one who protected it. This is what happens when you allow yourself to become entangled with someone of lower stature.” She raises her eyebrow at me.
Ah, so that’s what this bullshit with Bellamy is really about.
“Enough!” I shout, my anger boiling, fists clenched at my sides. “You’ve said enough about Bellamy. She is not some random woman I’m having an affair with. I am not my father and Bellamy is not that woman. Now, tell us what happened to Desta.”
“The woman became demanding. She told your father he had to divorce me, which he wouldn’t. She started threatening us. Threatening me. Threatening all of you. We fired her, obviously, and made sure the guards knew she was never allowed back on the palace grounds.”
The air in the room is thick with unease, heavy with the weight of the revelation as we struggle to comprehend what we’ve just heard. Althea’s hand is over her mouth, her heart visibly aching, whereas I see the betrayal etched onto Rowan’s face.
“That’s why Father told me to alert the guards when I woke him,” he says. “He knew it was that woman.”
“Yes.”
“And she killed him.”
“I don’t believe that was her intent, but yes.”
“You don’t believe that was her intent?” My eyebrows shoot up, incredulous.
“She loved him and when I saw her after that, she was devastated by it.”
The fuck?! I can’t deal with that. “When you saw her after?!” My voice booms and I pick up my glass, polishing off the two fingers of bourbon in one gulp.
“She took my child. I sought her out. I found her. And I made her a deal.”
I collapse forward, my elbows digging into my thighs, my face in my hands. She’s so cool about this. So cold and detached. Much like the woman I’ve known my whole life, but this…this is on an entirely different level.
“How did I not know of this?” Althea questions, her voice barely above a whisper.
“Because I told no one. My husband was dead, and my child was gone. I told the investigation team that I didn’t know who the culprit was and off they went on a wild-goose chase.”
“Why?” The word breaks past my lips.
“Because I couldn’t allow that sort of thing to get out,” she says haughtily.
“Think of the scandal. Of the taint that would put on our family and power in our country and the world. I offered her Desta’s tiara in exchange for Desta, and she agreed.
I met her on a vacant road in the middle of nowhere and she snatched the crown, cut my arm with her knife, and fled.
That was the last I ever saw of her or Desta. ”
Rowan shoots off the couch and starts pacing.
His glass in his hand, he finishes it before chucking it into the fire, crystal smashing against the stone inside the hearth.
“And at that point, you still didn’t tell the police or anyone you knew who took her?
! They could have searched. They could have found her, Mother. They could have found Desta.”
“Desta was already dead. As she retreated, she showed me the bloody pajamas. She told me she’d killed Desta and dumped her body in the river.”
“And you believed her?” I turn my head and meet her eyes, the same blue-gray as mine.
“Why wouldn’t she have done that?” she asks as if there were no other possibility. “Desta was a liability for her. She had no reason to keep her alive and no ransom was ever requested.”
“Except now we know the blood on those pajamas was Father’s and not Desta’s.”
“Yes,” my mother says. “Now we know that. But that doesn’t change the fact that Desta is still likely dead.”
I don’t think I’ve ever felt this level of betrayal before.
Not from Samil. Not from anyone. I glance at my brother and my aunt, catching their uneasy stares, and I’m not sure what to do with all of this.
It’s true, Desta was a liability for this woman, and why on earth would she want to keep around a baby who wasn’t hers?
But still. What if she did? She supposedly loved my father. Why not keep his daughter?
“You’ll give us every piece of information you have on this woman,” I tell her, my voice sharp enough to cut a diamond.
“This is not something that should come out,” she beseeches. “Think of what this sort of thing could do to us.”
I scoff. “Us? You allowed the woman who killed your husband and kidnapped your child to be free all these years. You are the reason we don’t have Desta.
If the police had known, they might have been able to find Desta immediately.
You allowed your child to remain gone, and for what?
To save face to the world? Who gives a shit? ”
“Sebastian—”
“No. You live in your residence at my discretion. You have no royal authority or claim in this country. If you want to continue to maintain such luxuries, you will give us every last piece of information you have and then pray we take pity on you. As it is, you are never to see my children. You are never to step foot in any of my homes or palaces again. You are never to speak ill of my wife again. If you do, I promise, I will not show you any mercy. As it is, I’m struggling to do so now. ”
She stands, trying to regain her composure.
“I have earned my place in this family through love and loyalty. My blood might not be royal like yours, but no amount of slander or scorn from you will ever change that. I did what I thought I had to do to protect both of you. To protect our family. Desta is dead. You’re a fool if you think otherwise. ”
My heart races, but I maintain steady eye contact with my mother as I speak through gritted teeth. “Family loyalty is more than just blind adherence to tradition. It is about risking whatever is necessary for those you love.”
“Very touching,” she replies coolly, her gaze never leaving mine.
“But have you forgotten your duty to your kingdom? You wish to simply discard generations of tradition and honor. And for what? Where will it lead you all these years later? You might want to consider that before you take off on some public witch hunt with a bad ending. Remember this. Every family has its breaking point. And when that time comes, you’d best be prepared to face the consequences. I was.”
With a swish of her red dress, she turns on her heel and stalks out of the room, leaving behind an oppressive cloud of bitterness and despair. As the door closes behind her, I release the breath I’ve been holding in my chest.
“I don’t even know what to say,” Rowan murmurs, his hands on his hips as he starts to pace again. “The hits keep coming.”
“Well, for now, we’ll get the information from her and privately investigate it.
As much as I hate to admit it, she’s right about not letting this go public.
Not only is it not in our best interest, but keeping this all quiet might give us the upper hand in finding the woman.
If she’s still alive and somewhat close to Messalina, she knows we found the blanket, but nothing else has been mentioned. ”
“How could she not have looked into her? After all these years?” Althea is beyond incredulous, as we all are.
“No clue. I can’t imagine if it had been one of my children. I’d have strangled that woman with my bare hands until she took me to them.”
“I knew your father was having affairs,” Althea admits.
“That was never a secret, and I knew it broke your mother’s heart.
She loved him and he never cared for her.
When he was murdered and Desta was taken, all she spoke of was the curse.
She blamed it for everything. I think her title and appearance were the only things she felt she had control over, and she did whatever it took to protect that.
Including sacrificing her own daughter.”
I shake my head and stand, scrubbing my hands up and down my face. “This is fucked.” So much so that I’m having trouble grappling with it. “I’m going to go see my wife and make sure she’s okay.”
“By calling it a curse, your mother excused her responsibility in this,” Althea continues.
“She excused your father’s as well. A curse does not remove a person’s free will and their actions had nothing to do with a curse. They are the reason this happened, nothing else.”
“Maybe. But some moments more than others it feels impossible to ignore the reality of our family.”
I leave Rowan and Althea here, needing a moment to myself.
Needing my wife’s smiling face and sunshine disposition.
I feel it creeping back in. The darkness.
I need to find a way to shake it before it consumes me once again.
I have matters of state to attend to. My country needs me and my entire being has been so focused on this madness with Desta.