Chapter 10 Nate
NATE
I checked my watch for the third time in ten minutes, then forced myself to stop.
Ember would arrive when she arrived.
Pacing my living room and obsessively tracking the time wouldn't make her get here any faster.
I tried to make everything perfect for her—a warm fire, a bottle of wine chilling, and soft music playing.
I wasn't trying to be super romantic, but setting the mood never hurt.
Besides, after days of being tense and warding off gossip around the office, we both deserved some space to relax and not have to feel the pressure of everything leaning in on us.
The past few days had been brutal.
After the hospital colleague had spotted us kissing at the charity drive, word had spread through the staff faster than I could contain it.
I encouraged Ember to have a day off if she needed one, but she insisted she was "fine", which had become her new favorite word. Or it seemed so to me.
I'd handled the fallout as best I could, but I hadn't seen Ember alone since that kiss.
We'd limited our interactions to emails and brief exchanges about scheduling.
The tension between us had grown unbearable, a live wire that threatened to spark every time we were in the same room.
Tonight, I'd finally texted her, asked if she'd come to my home after work to discuss it because if I had to live one more day in that office within reach of her without knowing where we stood, I was going to go mad.
She'd agreed, but I felt the hesitation in her single-word response of "Okay." When all of this exploded in my life, I never dreamed I'd be chasing down a twenty-something because I was falling for her.
Now here I was, planning secret meetings with her in my private residence to discuss how to handle gossip surrounding our non-relationship.
It felt like torture as I paced my living room waiting for her to show up until exactly seven thirty when the bell rang and I rushed to the door to open it for her.
"Hi," she said quietly. Her hair was down, framing her face, and she was stunning.
"Come in." I stepped aside to let her pass.
She hesitated on the threshold for a moment before entering, and I closed the door behind her.
When I turned back, she was standing in the middle of the living room, her arms wrapped around herself as though she needed protection from me.
So many emotions erupted at that sight, but I could only think so fast.
My brain stumbled over what to say and I ended up muttering, "Would you like some wine?"
"Please."
I crossed to the sideboard, poured two glasses, and handed her one.
She took it gratefully and sank onto the sofa, curling her legs beneath her and letting her shoes drop to the floor.
I sat on the opposite end, giving her space, but the awkward silence was killing me.
"Nate, I really think we should talk," she said softly, and I couldn't have agreed more.
"Yeah," I mumbled, setting my wine glass down. "It's gotten a bit hairy, huh?"
Ember chuckled and then laughed.
Then she laughed so hard she snorted and used a drink of her wine as cover, but I chuckled at her anyway. "What?" I asked, and she set her wine down and angled her body to face mine.
"Big Foot is hairy. This is more like the Kraken." The defeated way she said the words tore my heart open.
It was easy to see she was torn up by this too, probably tormented.
I couldn’t imagine going through what she went through and I'd been through a few things.
When Kristy and I were set to be married and she cheated on me, I lost it. Having your heart ripped out when you trust someone is next-level pain.
"Look, Ember, I know this is really complicated and it's made worse by the things you lived through, but I don’t want the town to pressure either of us into backing away from each other. I really like you." I inched closer on the sofa and she didn't shy away.
"It's just that the way they're talking about us makes me very uncomfortable.
They have no clue that there really is something going on between us.
They're just spreading rumors, but it kills me because there's truth behind those rumors.
" Her eyes narrowed as her forehead formed deep creases.
"I hate being that girl everyone talks about. "
"I will defend you," I told her, scooting close enough to take her hand and press it to my lips. I'd heard what men my age were calling me, a cradle robber and other, worse, things. But they looked at Ember like a child still growing up.
I saw her as a beautiful, amazing woman—and a powerhouse at that.
Her desire to chase down a career and rise to the top was admirable, but backed by her talent and knowledge, I knew she could do it. I saw the potential she had and the smarts, and I found every bit if it just as attractive as her body.
"Nate, I just…"
Then came the knock at the door.
We both froze, but my heart sank too.
We were just beginning to bond.
Ember pulled back slightly, her eyes wide. "Are you expecting someone?"
"No." I glanced toward the front door, irritation spiking through me. "Stay here."
I stood and crossed to the door, already composing a polite dismissal for whoever had decided to interrupt.
When I opened it, my father stood on the front steps with a windswept combover and a scowl of disapproval on his face.
"We need to talk," he said, pushing past me into the house.
My stomach dropped.
I turned to see Ember scrambling off the sofa, smoothing her blouse and trying to compose herself.
My father took one look at her and his face darkened further.
"Of course," he said coldly. "I should've known."
"What do you need, Dad?" I closed the door and moved to stand between him and Ember. "I wish you'd have called. You shouldn’t just come over without announcing yourself first."
Years of tension and painful moments knotted together in my shoulders as I scrambled to think of a way to make him leave before he hurt Ember the way he was so good at doing.
"I can when my son is making a fool of himself." He gestured at Ember without looking at her. "Is this her? The girl from the photographs?"
"Her name is Ember," I said through gritted teeth. "And yes, she's my guest."
"Your guest." He swept a hand downward over his face and turned fully toward me so his back was to her. "Nathan, do you have any idea what people are saying about you?"
"I'm aware of the gossip, yes." I noticed Ember chewing a nail and tried to ignore the pained expression on her face.
"Then you understand that you need to end this immediately." He finally looked at Ember directly. "No offense, young lady, but you're a liability. To his career, to his reputation, to the entire Lightkeeper tradition."
Ember flinched as though she'd been struck.
Her face screwed up into a grimace and her eyes pleaded with me for help.
Rage surged through me almost immediately. "Don't speak to her that way."
"Someone needs to speak plainly," my father said. "You're throwing away everything you've built, and for what? A fling with your secretary?"
"She's not my secretary. She's—"
"No, she's also young enough to be your daughter, which makes this entire situation even more distasteful." He turned back to me. "I raised you better than this, Nathan."
"You raised me to prioritize achievement over happiness," I shot back. "I am successful now. Can't I just have a private life without my father nosing in? Christ, I'm almost fifty."
"I raised you to be a man of integrity," he said coldly.
"And I am. But integrity doesn't mean bowing to other people's expectations for whom I should be with or how I should live my life."
I stepped closer to him and sighed hard. "I'm forty-eight years old. I don't need your permission or your approval."
"You need my support if you want to keep your position at the hospital. The board listens to me, Nathan. One word from me and your career—"
"Then say the word." I cut him off. "Go ahead. Tell the board whatever you want. Sabotage my career if it makes you feel powerful. But I'm done letting you control my choices."
My father's face went red. "You're making a mistake."
"The only mistake I've made is caring what you think for far too long." I walked to the front door and opened it. "Get out of my house."
"Nathan—"
"I said get out." My voice was loud enough that it echoed through the room.
I'd never raised my voice to my father before or challenged him so directly.
The shock on his face was almost worth the anger still burning in my chest, and though the regret and shame came instantly, I held my position and stood firmly.
He would not treat the woman I cared about like that.
He stared at me for a long moment, then straightened his shoulders and walked to the door.
He walked out, and I slammed the door behind him hard enough that the windows rattled.
The house fell into sudden, heavy silence.
I stood with my forehead pressed flat on the wood and my pulse hammering in my ears, trying to get my breathing under control.
"Nate." Ember's voice was so tiny, I almost didn't hear her past the roar of my heartbeat.
I turned to find her standing in the middle of the living room, her arms wrapped around herself again.
The way she shrank herself for protection broke my heart.
"I'm sorry," I said, crossing to her. "I'm so sorry you had to hear that."
"Your dad…" Her head shook. "I can't…"
"Don't." I pulled her into my arms, holding her tightly. "Don't let his words define you. He's bitter and controlling and he's been that way my entire life. None of what he said reflects the truth."
She pressed her face against my chest but didn't relax into the embrace. "Maybe I should go."
The defeat in her tone felt like a knife in my chest.
"Please don't." I pulled back just enough to look at her face, then I cupped both cheeks. "Don’t leave. We'll have dinner and talk. We don't have to do anything else tonight. Just stay."
She hesitated, clearly torn between wanting to flee and wanting to stay.
Finally, she nodded. "Okay, I'll stay for dinner, but that's all. I'm not in the mood for anything else after that display."
"That's fine." I kissed her forehead gently. "Whatever you need."
We had dinner, takeout of Thai food Ember said she was craving, though our conversation really centered around how to handle the chaos at work.
Both of us resolved to pretend that nothing was happening and act normally for the time being, but we also both agreed that neither wanted this to end. We'd just have to be more careful.
It was after nine when she left, and I kissed her goodbye inside so the neighbors wouldn't see us.
And as soon as her Uber pulled up and whisked her away, I turned and walked to the gas fireplace and turned it off, then leaned on the mantel.
From the time I was eighteen years old, my father had dictated most of the important choices in my life.
The one time I had chosen to rebel against him by asking Kristy to marry me, he had jeered at me and thrown it in my face.
And who could ever have known what she'd do?
But he swore he called that out long before we were that far in.
He rubbed that in my face and made me feel like less of a man—part of the reason I was still single at nearly fifty.
But Ember didn't feel like a mistake or a bad choice.
Albeit, neither had Kristy at the time.
Still, everyone in this town had an opinion and all of them thought it was a bad idea even though none of them knew the extent of what was going on behind closed doors.
What if Ember wasn't a mistake and my father and the festival committee were all wrong?
And what if she was exactly what I needed after all this time?
And what if I let them pressure me to push her away when she and I needed each other?
I was too old for any of this.
I'd finally met a woman I adored and time was running out for me to find the love of my life and grow old together with her.
I refused to let them manipulate me out of fear for my future.
If it took everything I had, I intended to fight for Ember Harrison and make her a permanent part of my life until the day she no longer wanted it.
And perhaps a few days after that, too.