15. Chapter Fourteen
They had arrived at her house a couple of minutes ago. She tried to tell Mac it wasn’t a big deal and she would call someone, but that wasn’t happening. He had insisted and told her it would only take him a couple of minutes to see if anything was stuck down there.
“Can you think of anything that it could be?” Mac asked as he stood in front of her sink.
Janie’s eyes hadn’t left the sink since they got into the kitchen. Knowing that Mac was going to stick his hand down to figure out what it was didn’t sit well with Janie. What if something happened?
She knew she would be in too much shock to call anyone if anything happened. Her worst nightmares would be coming true.
“Pinky,” Mac gently said. “Are you okay?”
She nodded her head but didn’t look at him. It was a lie and he could probably tell that it was.
Mac moved so he was in her line of sight.
“Pinky, I want you to look at me,” he said. “My eyes.”
She looked at him and he gave her a smile.
“There’s my girl,” he softly said. “No, don’t look away. Look at me. Focus on me.”
How could she do that when she knew what was going to happen? And this is why she wanted to call someone. Have them come over and leave so she didn’t have to think about it. Or better yet, maybe she should call someone and ask them to get rid of it. That sounds even better than trying to fix it.
“Janie,” Mac’s voice went deeper. “Look at me.” She looked back at him. She honestly hadn’t even realized that her eyes had moved to try and find the sink again.
“Good girl. Now, can you answer my question?” he asked.
She opened her mouth but closed it. What was his question?
“Do you know what it could be that is stuck in there?” He asked. “It’s okay if you don’t.”
“Maybe a bottle. It’s not glass or anything,” she replied.
“Okay, that’s good. I’ll be extra careful in case it is something that’s glass.”
Maybe it wasn’t too late to try and change his mind. He didn’t need to do this.
“I can just call someone,” she said. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Janie,” he said. “I’m doing this for you. End of discussion. Now, can you tell me which switch is the one that turns it on?”
She pointed to the lonely switch. It was easy to remember which one it was. Donald had wanted it with the rest of the other light switches but she didn’t. What if she fell into Littlespace and accidentally turned it on?
Yeah, that wasn’t happening. Though, when she was Little she wasn’t anywhere near the kitchen.
“Thank you,” Mac said. “Now, I’m going to take a quick peak.”
She watched as he turned his back on her and walked towards the sink again. Janie watched his movements. Nerves were running through her body as he slowly put his hand on the sink. Something was going to happen.
Her fingers moved towards her mouth and she subconsciously started to bite them. What if something happened? Was he going to lose too much blood and not make it to the hospital? What if the thing magically turned on.
Janie watched as his hand lowered into the drain. Her eyes were trained on his hand, watching him to make sure nothing happened. She wouldn’t be able to do anything this far away, but she didnt know what else to do. She wouldn’t be able to sit down in the living room or in her office and work. Her mind would be on him and his hand in the drain.
Her eyes moved from his hand to his face, trying to find any sign of discomfort. But nothing was there. She looked back down at his hand. How long was he going to be in there? Was he finding anything? What if his hand got stuck and he couldn’t get it out? Maybe she should have just sucked it up and put her hand down there. It was much smaller than his.
There were so many things that could go wrong. She didn’t want anything to happen to Mac, not in her own house.
Mac moved his hand and she let out a little whimper. Was he hurt? Did something happen? She didn’t hear anything turn on or him scream in pain. What could have gone wrong?
“Janie?” Mac asked.
She kept her eyes on his hand. He wasn’t moving it. Was it hurt?
“Pinky? Are you okay?” he asked.
Janie was watching his hand and biting her fingernails even more. She could feel slight pain and the metallic taste in her mouth, but she didn’t care right now. Mac could get hurt or he could already be hurt.
She knew he was talking to her, but her brain wasn’t fully registering it. She was solely focused on his hand down the strain and the possibility of it randomly turning on and hurting him.
His hand slowly moved out of the drain and she searched his hand for any signs of blood.
Nothing.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
She stared at the sink again. His hand had been down there. He could have been hurt. Mac could have almost died. Why had she let him do that? It wasn’t okay.
“Janie,” he gently said.
He moved in front of her and knelt down. Her eyes went back to the sink. She definitely needed to get rid of that now. She would never be able to look at it the same.
Mac touched her hand and pulled it away from her mouth. She let out a little whimper and she locked eyes with him.
“It’s okay. You’re okay,” he whispered. “Nothing is going to happen. I’m okay.”
She stared at him, not wanting to speak right now. He had his hand down the drain. She had repeated that over and over in her mind, but she still wasn’t fully wrapping it around her brain.
“Were you worried that I was going to hurt myself?” he asked.
She nodded her head. Anything could have happened. What if he had accidentally touched the switch and turned it on while his hand was still down there? What if he had asked her to do something and she accidentally turned it on? She would never forgive herself.
“Thank you for telling me that,” he said. “You’re such a good girl. Nothing is going to happen. You don’t have to worry about anything.”
Janie watched as he looked down at her hand that was in her mouth.
“Oh, baby,” he gently said. “You’ve made yourself bleed.”
She looked down at her hand and saw some blood trickling down her fingers. She had felt the pain and tasted the blood, but it hadn’t registered in her mind. It still hadn’t.
“Can you tell me where your first aid kit is?” he asked.
She turned her body and pointed towards the main bathroom.
“The bathroom?” he asked.
She nodded her head.
“Do you want me to pick you up or do you think you can walk with me to the bathroom?”
She stared at him, not knowing how to answer. Her legs weren’t hurt but she didn’t really want to walk there.
“I’ll pick you up,” he gently said. “Ready?”
Before she could nod, he gently picked her up and started to walk towards the bathroom. Janie relaxed in his arms and placed her head on his shoulder. He was so comfortable. She could be in his arms for hours and never get tired of it.
But he would.
“Is everything under the sink?” he asked and she nodded her head.
She had wanted to put it in the closet, but that required being organized and she wasn’t that way. It was just all over under the sink. A complete mess.
Mac placed her down on the counter, squatted, and started to look under her sink. Hopefully he was able to find everything that he needed.
“Alright,” Mac said as he stood up. “I’m going to clean it off and then we’re going to put some beautiful bandaids on.”
She stared at him as he placed everything down on the counter next to her.
“This might sting a little. If it does, I gave you full permission to squeeze my arm, okay?”
She nodded her head.
“Place your hand on my arm so you can squeeze,” he said.
She placed her hand on his arm and watched as he put some rubbing alcohol on a cotton ball.
“Alright, it may hurt,” he said.
She gripped his arm as she felt her fingers hurt from where he rubbed the cotton ball on them. “Ouchie,” she whispered and tried to pull her hand away.
“Be careful,” he said. “I’m almost done and then we can put the medicine and bandaid on.”
Janie watched in fascination as he blew on them before placing some medicine on the bandaid and gently wrapping it around her fingers. One by one he covered each and every one that bled.
“Do you do this a lot?” he asked.
She didn’t say anything. Janie didn’t want to answer that question.
“Pinky,” he said. “Do you bite your fingernails until they bleed a lot?”
She shrugged her shoulders. Sometimes and sometimes she didn’t.
“Janie.”
“Sometimes,” she whispered. “When I’m super stressed.”
He cupped her cheeks with his hands so she was looking at him. It was like he could read into her soul right now.
“Oh, Pinky. Nothing was going to happen. I was perfectly safe,” he gently said.
“How do you know that?” she asked.
There was no way he could guarantee that he was safe. Not with that thing. Horror movies showed that it could happen.
“The power bottom was off,” he said. “Nothing was going to happen. I was completely safe.”
Mac wrapped his arms around her. She felt safe, snug, and protected.
“Everything is going to be okay,” he whispered in her ear. “You’re not going to worry about a thing.”
He pulled back, but kept himself close so that she could feel the heat radiating off of him.
“I’m going to go back and take a look at it again,” he said.
“No!” she yelled. “You can’t. I’ll call someone and get them to look at it. Then I’ll leave while they’re looking at it.”
He raised his eyebrow. “You’re not doing that. This is what we’ll do. You’ll be in Littlespace so you don’t have to worry about anything while I look at it.”
She shook her head. That wasn’t going to work.
“Nope,” she replied. “I cant be Little right now.”
“It’s okay to be Little in front of me. I’ve seen you at the club. This may be different because we’re at your house, but no one else is going to see you.”
“No.”
“I’ll look after you, no matter what. I promise. You’ll be safe and happy.”
She shook her head again. “I want to make sure everything is okay while you look at my sink. I won’t be able to be Little right now. Not when I know you’re going to look at my sink and possibly get hurt.”
He wrapped his arms around her again. Janie nuzzled her head into his chest, loving the feeling of his warmth surrounding her and the smell of him.
“I’m not going to get hurt.”
“Please,” she begged.
“I’ll let you come with me only if you hold my hand the whole time. I don’t want you to stick your fingers in your mouth,” he said. “Do you understand?”
She nodded her head.
“Words.”
“Yes, da-sir.”
She closed her eyes and willed her body not to go stiff. She had almost called him Daddy again. Maybe if she didn’t react to it, he wouldn’t realize it like last time. She was betting on that and Janie didn’t know what she would do if he had actually caught on and heard it.
“Good girl,” he said and pulled away. “Now, let’s go to the kitchen and get this over with.”
He helped her down off of the sink and they walked back towards the kitchen.
“I want both of your hands on mine,” Mac said.
She nodded her head and grabbed his hand when he stretched it out.
“I think I may know what it is. Nothing sharp and shouldn’t take me long to get it at all,” he said. “Can you be brave for twenty seconds while I grab it? You can squeeze my hand as hard as you need to.”
“Okay,” she whispered. She could already feel herself squeezing his hand and he hadn’t even attempted to reach in yet. Mac leaned forward and kissed her forehead.
“Everything is going to be okay.”
She watched him like a hawk as he put his hand back down the drain. Janie held her breath the whole time and squeezed his hand really hard.
Before she knew it, his hand was coming back up and she saw a pink glittery baby bottle emerge from the garbage disposal. A gasp fell from her lips, she let go of Mac’s hand and lunged for the baby bottle.
Her whole face turned bright red as she snatched it out of Mac’s hand. Janie had wondered where this had gone. She had just thought Eleanor had grabbed it and placed it somewhere she couldn’t find.
“Thank you. You can go now,” she hurriedly said.
Janie placed the baby bottle behind her and looked down at the ground. She could not look at him right now. It was too embarrassing.
She should have just sucked it up and done it herself. Maybe use the tongs her ex-husband had bought but never used. Anything but Mac pulling it out would have been better.
“Please go. You don’t need to be here any more.”
Any second now her voice was going to start cracking and she would cry. This was so embarrassing. Why did he have to pull it out? Why did she not pay close enough attention and let it fall down there in the first place?
“Pinky,” Mac said.
“Please go,” her voice cracked. “Thank you for getting it out.” Mac grabbed her face with his hands and forced her to look at him. She closed her eyes. She didn’t want to see what emotions were across his face.
“Janie It’s okay,” he whispered. “Everything is going to be okay.”
“No,” she mumbled. Everything wasn’t going to be okay. Sure, he had seen her playing before at the club, but he had never seen her use a bottle. It was private.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed about that,” he said. “It doesn’t matter if you use baby bottles or diapers. I’m still going to be there for you and will take care of you. In Little headspace, but also as adult you.”
Janie still had her eyes closed.
“Can you please look at me?” he asked.
She shook her head to the best of her ability.
“Please.”
Her eyes cracked slightly open and she looked at him. Everything about this was different than before. It wasn’t the club setting. It was her own house and he had never been in there before, never seen her Little stuff.
“Such a good girl,” Mac said. “You have nothing to be afraid of or embarrassed about. I’m a Daddy. You’re a Little girl. I want to help you, take care of you. If that means you want to use a bottle, then you can use a bottle. If you want to use a diaper then you can.”
Mac gently grabbed the bottle from her hand. She tried to keep her grip on it, but she wasn’t successful.
“Let me clean the bottle for you,” he said as he turned around towards the sink.
“You don’t have to!” her voice raised as she talked. He really didn’t need to wash it for her. “Mac, you really don’t need to do that. I can clean it later. Please, you can go now.”
He turned around and looked at her. “Janie, I want to do this for you.”
Her shoulders sagged as she watched him clean her baby bottle.
“Everything is going to be okay,” he said. “You don’t have any reason to be embarrassed or nervous.” That was easy for him to say. He was perfect in everything.
“Do you want a bottle?” he asked.
She shook her head. There was no way she was going to drink that in front of him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am. I don’t want to have a bottle when my daughter should be getting back in an hour,” Janie replied. “I don’t want to be in Littlespace for such a short time. Especially when I’m going to have to talk to my sister.”
Joann didn’t know that Janie was a Little and she wanted to keep it that way. She wasn’t embarrassed by any means, but it just wasn’t something she was comfortable doing. Joann had never given any indication that she may be a Little and Janie didn’t want her to misunderstand and question everything.
“Okay,” he said as he placed the clean bottle upside down to dry. “I’m here for you if you ever need someone to look after you while you want to be Little. You can call me at any point and I’ll be there for you.”
Janie nodded her head. There was no way she was going to do that. It was going to step over a line that they hadn’t crossed yet. A big line they hadn’t crossed yet. It was different when it was at the club because there were other Littles there. But at her house, it was just her and it was more intimate.
“If you need anything while you’re on your period, just call me,” Mac said. “And I mean it. I know some people can have super bad cramps, get headaches, and just don’t feel good. If you need or want anything, call me and I’ll help you or get it.”
Her face got bright red and she shook her head. There was no way he was going to help with anything. It was weird and embarrassing.
“There isn’t anything you need to be embarrassed about. It’s a normal thing,” he said. “I want you to eventually be comfortable around me so I can help you in any way. I know it’ll take time and I’m a patient man. But if you need any candy, heating pad, pads, tampons, or food, you let me know and I’ll get it for you. Do you understand?”
She nodded her head.
“I’ll make sure to check in with you every once in a while to see how you’re doing and feeling,” Mac said.
“You don’t need to do that,” she softly said.
“But I want to. I really do and I wouldn’t have offered or said I was going to if I wasn’t or didn’t want to.”
She blinked at him several times. He was so much different than what her ex-husband was like. So much different and all in a good way. He was caring and wanted to make sure everything was okay.
“Well, I’m going to go now. You take care of yourself and tell Eleanor I said hi,” he said, kissing her forehead and walking towards the door. “Lock this after me.”
She followed after him and locked the door when he left. There was so much that had happened in such a short amount of time.
Janie leaned her head against the door and took several deep breaths of air. What did she need to get done before Eleanor came home? Shit. She had completely forgotten about her car. She was going to have to text Mac about that later.