Chapter 22
Jared couldn’t be serious.
He wanted to lay down some rules and consequences because she was under his roof when she wasn’t there voluntarily?
The guy was nuts.
They both were.
Remember, you should play along. Lull them into a false sense of security.
Make them think you want to be here and then run!
How to do that without making them suspicious of her, though?
Hmm.
That was a good question. One she didn’t have a ready answer to. She guessed she’d have to take it slowly.
“Well, I’m not agreeing to that. And there aren’t going to be any consequences.”
Good job on being more agreeable and doing what they want.
Urgh, she was such an idiot most of the time.
Most or all?
She knew she wasn’t the smartest cookie. But what she lacked in book smarts she’d really thought she made up for in street smarts.
However, she was beginning to have her doubts about that too.
“I don’t believe I asked for your agreement,” Jared said as North left. “So you have a whale called Wallina? At least the name will be easy to remember.”
“I named her in memory of Wally,” she said. “I didn’t realize that he’d survived.”
“I’ve been looking after him for you,” he said quietly. “No one was going to harm him on my watch.”
Okay, that shouldn’t make her soften toward him.
He might not have been the one to kidnap her, but he was still keeping her here.
So yeah, she shouldn’t be nicer to him just because he said some kind words.
But this might be an opportunity for her to pretend to give in.
“Thank you,” she told him quietly.
She tried to tell herself that her gratitude was a pretense.
Unfortunately, it seemed that she was lying to herself now.
“You’re welcome,” he replied huskily as he stared down at her with those intense dark-brown eyes.
God, he was gorgeous. He had classically good looks; he could almost be too pretty if it wasn’t for his beard that had a healthy sprinkling of gray and the tattoos that peeked out just above his collar.
“What would you like to wear after your shower? North brought everything over from the other room.”
Everything? All of the Little stuff too?
Jared walked over to the closet, opening it.
They knew she was a Little.
“Um, I don’t know. Just clothes.”
He drew out a pair of pajamas. They were pale blue with a thin yellow stripe. “You won’t be getting out of bed, today. So these will do.”
“Is North really your assistant?” she asked.
“He assists me,” Jared told her.
“Is this . . . is this your house?”
“Yes, it is. I didn’t want to live in Fergus’s house.”
She shuddered. “No one did.”
Picking her up, he carried her into the bathroom.
“I can walk,” she protested. “You’ll get a sore back.”
“I’m unsure if you’re insulting me or yourself when you say that,” Jared told her.
She opened her mouth but he kept talking.
“And you’re not allowed to do either so I suggest you tread very carefully.”
“Well, rat-bums,” she muttered. “How fit are you?”
“Fit enough to carry you for as long as I need to.”
And there went her stomach again, swooping and spinning.
There was something wrong with her. She shouldn’t want this man like she did.
He’s keeping you here against your will.
Although did you come straight out and ask to leave?
Do you want to leave?
Of course I do. Why would I want to stay here?
With two gorgeous, sexy, handsome, controlling, bossy, at times terrifying men?
“What would you say if I said I wanted to leave? Right now?” she asked.
He set her down on the countertop. “I should let you go. I am not my father. But I don’t like that you were so unprotected. I need to have a chat with Zander.”
A hint of disappointment sparked.
What had she been expecting him to say? That he wanted her to stay?
Urgh. You’re acting like an idiot.
She had to have Stockholm Syndrome.
“I’ll have to make sure that Zander doesn’t try to retaliate.”
Yeah, that sounded like something Zander would do.
She couldn’t believe she was in this situation again. Even though he wasn’t Fergus and neither of them had hurt her . . . it still felt like the walls were closing in.
This room was nicer than the last one.
But it was still a prison.
Her breathing started coming in short pants and the world around her began to spin.
“Angie? What’s wrong? Can’t you breathe? Fuck. Hold on, baby. Just hold on.”
“I’ve got the IV set up. What’s wrong?” North asked.
“Baby, listen to me. I need you to breathe.”
“Oh, she’s having a panic attack,” North said.
When had he come in? Also, her lungs were really starting to burn.
She needed to breathe.
“I know that. Angie, come on, breathe. You’re going to pass out.”
“Angie,” North said sharply. “Listen to me. I need you to do exactly as I say. Now, look at me.”
She raised her gaze to his, staring at him through blurry eyes.
“Put your hands up in the air. That’s it. Now make a circle with one finger. That’s it. Then the other.”
As she followed North’s directions, her heart rate started to grow slower and she could take a few shallow breaths.
“Now, breathe in with your belly.” He placed his hand over her stomach.
If she hadn’t still been trembling and feeling ill and breathless, she might have liked that more.
Why was she always in a terrible state around this man? Vomiting? Panicking? Launching herself at him in a rage?
Well, he’d set himself up for all of it, hadn’t he?
“Breathe in through your belly. Come on, push against my hand. You can do better than that. In, one, two, three, four. Now, out slowly for six.”
“Good girl,” Jared told her, rubbing her back.
Oh God.
That was something she definitely liked. It had been rare for her to ever hear praise growing up. And now she didn’t trust it when people told her that she was doing a great job or that she was smart or really, for anything.
But she seemed to lap it up from Jared.
“Not yet, she’s not,” North said, shattering the soft glow she had going.
Lord, he was a dick.
“Not until she gives me three more belly breaths. Then she gets the praise.”
She felt her lower lip drop out in a pout.
“And put that away. You know it doesn’t work on me,” North ordered.
No, because he had no heart.
She turned the pout on Jared who also shook his head. “It’s cute. But it’s not going to work on me either.”
North guided her through some more belly breaths and to her shock, she did feel her nervous system start to calm.
The shaking stopped. And her heart rate slowed. Her body moved out of fight or flight mode.
“When you concentrate on breathing through your belly there’s no room for thinking about anything else,” North told her. “It calms you down if you're overloaded. And it can also make you sleepy.”
Right.
She’d agree with that assessment.
As though he’d just realized that he was touching her, North snatched his hand back and stood. “There, you should be okay now.”
“Um, thank you,” she told him.
He just nodded and left the bathroom.
Wasn’t he going to tell her that she did a good job?
Jared cupped her chin in his hand and turned her head toward him. “Being here made you panic.”
“Can you blame me?” she asked, breathlessly.
And her breathlessness had nothing to do with her panic attack and everything to do with his closeness.
His touch.
Holy. Moly.
She swallowed heavily.
“No. I don’t.” He looked away and she had to fight the urge to touch him.
Or maybe she wanted to beg him to touch her. She wasn’t sure.
“Come on, let’s run you a bath. Although you really need to wash your hair. I’ll do that for you.” Jared turned away to run the bath.
“I can fill the bath. And wash my own hair.”
He didn’t really think that she was going to let him bathe her, right?
Surely not.
However, he didn’t answer. Instead, he searched in the cupboards, then poured some bubblebath into the water.
Then he walked over to her, placing his hands on the counter on either side of her. “I’m not a good man.”
She swallowed heavily. What was he going to say? To do?
Was this the part where he . . . where he turned on her?
“But I am not my father. I will not harm you. And neither will anyone else.”
Angie frowned, running those words through her head.
“You know that I was safe even though I don’t live with Zander anymore, right? I’m nobody. No one wants to hurt me or is coming after me.”
“Don’t call yourself nobody.”
Good. Lord. He kept focusing on the wrong thing.
“I was safe. And I’m not sure why you’d care. We’re not friends. I haven’t heard from you since I escaped. So why would you care?”
He stared at her for a long moment. “You’re right. Why would I care?”
Okay. Why did that hurt her feelings? Had she wanted him to protest that he did care?
Last time she’d seen Jared, he’d been cold. Almost . . . mean. Definitely detached.
He didn’t seem quite as cold now. But he still had the potential to become that person.
And she wasn’t strong enough right now to protect herself from that sort of hurt.
“I want to bathe on my own.” Hurt was bubbling in her throat.
You’re being stupid.
Right? But at the moment, she just felt like she needed to cry.
Alone.
Angie hated crying. She rarely did it. Because it seemed like a complete waste of time.
And she certainly never cried in front of anyone.
“You need help washing your hair,” he stated.
“I really don’t. What I need is some privacy. If you’re not going to let me leave yet, then isn’t that the least that you can do for me?”
Angie thought he would refuse. But to her shock, he nodded and stepped back. Then he moved to the bath, running his fingers through it, before turning off the taps.
“There is shampoo and conditioner in the shower. You might want to wash your hair in there. Do not stay too long in here. We need to get some food and liquid into you. I will be waiting out in the bedroom. If you need me, call out.”
And then he lifted her down off the counter.
And left.
He’d just left her and she felt . . . weird.
Alone.
Don’t be stupid. He’s keeping you here against your will. You do not want his company.
Tears dripped down her face.
She was a complete mess.
Because she really, really wanted his company.
His, and the man who had kidnapped her. And neither of them were good choices for her. One was emotionally and physically distant. In fact, she wasn’t sure he had emotions.
And the other one was the son of the man who had nearly destroyed her. He’d also proven in the past that he could swing from warm and caring to cold and unfeeling in a heartbeat.
She needed normal.
Ordinary.
Maybe if she said it often enough it would come true.