Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
Rhodes
“I’m not telling you that you’re wrong… but I’m not sure this is a good idea.” That was polite. Daddy was just not right. It was okay to point that out. “Things just happen.”
Daddy sighed and raised one eyebrow. “I traded you kisses and bought you that apple. A deal’s a deal.”
Ugh.
I was too easily bribed.
“I think I need to work on being more expensive.” Daddy’s nod said he valued me even if I forgot how important I was. “I’ll do better next time.”
Shrugging, Daddy leaned over and kissed my head. “I’d have gone for the full fruit basket. You settled.”
I was going to be very expensive next time he wanted me to do something scary.
“That’s kind of mean to point out, Daddy.” His grin said he wasn’t worried. “You need to apologize later. Yes. Lots of sorries and kisses.”
He snorted.
How rude.
“I already gave you kisses before we left the house and you thoroughly enjoyed it.” Daddy tugged my hand and made me walk faster. “If you go any slower, we’re going to be moving backward.”
Possibly.
But now we were going forward.
“I like getting kisses.” Hmm. “I might be happier if you give me more later.”
“Nothing is going to make you happier at the moment because for some reason you think my family is as nuts as yours.” Daddy needed to work on his peptalks… and giving me more bribes. “You’ve put this off for a month.”
Because family was scary.
“What if they don’t like me?” My family was doing better but that didn’t mean his would like me. “What if they don’t like you dating a man?”
He kept saying they didn’t care but they might.
“Then I tattle on my sister and get her into big trouble with my mother.” Daddy shrugged. “She’s nice or she’s dead meat.”
That wasn’t what he was supposed to say either.
“You’re supposed to say of course they’ll be nice and like me and I’m being silly.” We were going to have to practice before we had dinner with his family. “Let’s go home and we’ll try again later when you know how to give the talk right.”
“No.” He was stubborn. “We’re here. They’re here. The food is here and I know you’re hungry. I promised you a big burger because we only had salad for lunch.”
I liked burgers.
I liked fries.
I didn’t like salad because my tummy always started growling later.
Lettuce was cute but it wasn’t real food.
Hmm.
How sneaky was Daddy?
“You said you forgot the big part of lunch.” Right. Daddy had just forgot so we had to have salad. “You forgot, right?”
“That’s what I said.” Daddy smiled and kissed my head again. “You have a very good memory.”
“I’m smart. You have to tell them I’m smart because they’ll like that.” Oh. “And you have to poke me or something if I forget you’re my Knight and I accidentally call you Daddy.”
He barked out a laugh. “You already did that last week when I was on the phone.”
Oops.
Well, at least it hadn’t been my family?
I was good at being boring with them and Daddy was good at making them not be naughty. He’d even made them be so nice we had dinner without anyone saying mean stuff.
Twice.
Daddy was amazing.
“What did they say? Are they mad I made you… well… a Daddy?” They might think I’d made Daddy weird. “What if they talk about it? What do I say?”
Daddy’s mother was nice but his sister was… well… I was pretty sure she’d fit in with my brothers.
Kind of.
Maybe?
It was hard to tell but she’d fit in better with them than I did.
She was feisty and nosy and bossy and lots of stuff.
“They said they thought I’d already had that kind of relationship when I was in college and then they had questions about this girl that I’d dated.
” Daddy shrugged again when I giggled. “Now I have questions about that relationship too, but it just boils down to the fact that they’re ridiculously nosy and don’t really care what we’re doing because… ”
Daddy sighed when I pouted and tried to walk slower. He was going to be stubborn. “Fine… because I make you happy.”
“That’s right.” He smiled when we finally got to the door of the restaurant. “If you stop pouting, I’ll get you a milkshake too.”
I liked milkshakes.
“They’ve got an Oreo shake and a chocolate-covered strawberry one…” Daddy knew he was cheating and it made him smile.
He was naughty.
Somehow I kept forgetting how naughty he was because he just looked so nice.
Looking nice was very dangerous.
“Strawberry chocolate, please.” I sucked in my lip but I did it big so I looked like a frog person.
He was naughty and just snickered. “You’re so dramatic, I guess you don’t want a coloring page. They’ve got big ones here.”
Oh.
I liked coloring.
“I’m not dramatic.” I was just… theatrical. Yes. That was a much better word. “I can’t color. I’m big.”
Kind of.
Daddy snorted like he was an ogre. “If you say so.”
I did.
I’d have told him that again and again and again but he opened the door and I had to pretend to be boring for the lady.
Ugh.
I didn’t want to be boring.
I wanted to play with my fruit and get attention from Daddy.
But no… I had to be big and boring and watch someone else’s family be rude and say weird things.
“We’re here to meet… them.” Daddy laughed as a woman who had to be Daddy’s sister stood up and waved. “We’re here with the nuts but please let our server know I tip well.”
The lady at the stand tried not to laugh. “We’re happy to have you here.”
She was nice and didn’t look too boring… maybe I could come color with her if dinner wasn’t fun?
“Big tips… as long as they pretend we’re boring and normal.” Daddy smiled as the lady giggled. “We’ll seat ourselves.”
As he led me toward the loud ladies who were both waving, Daddy sighed. “I really wish one day they’d learn to just sit down and be patient.”
“I’m patient.” I was quieter too and I could whisper as we walked past the other people. “Remember, I know my manners so that means I get more kisses later.”
I liked kisses.
I liked fruit.
“I like bananas and kisses at the same time too.” I was being serious but Daddy laughed. I’d have to tell him I was serious later, though, because we were walking too fast again and suddenly we were at the table.
He needed to walk slower.
“Already being ridiculous, I see.” Shaking his head, Daddy frowned at them. “I thought you were going to work on making a good impression on Rhodes?”
Daddy’s mother looked sorry for just a second but his sister was just naughty. “I tried. It didn’t work.”
I tried better because I smiled like a big boy and looked very boring.
Daddy rolled his eyes at them but just had his regular smile face for me. “Rhodes, this is my mother Linda and my sister Meredith.”
“Ladies, this is my boyfriend Rhodes.” Daddy was being silly and glaring at them to behave.
I was a good boy and smiled politely and gave them my happy work wave. “Hello, it’s nice to meet you both.”
Boring.
Boring.
Boring.
I was boring.
Oh.
Nope.
Ignore the page.
Ignore the crayons.
Boring.
Boring.
Boring.
Oh dear.
It had fruit and burgers and veggies on it.
“For fuck’s sake. How about you guys be subtle for once?” Daddy’s eyes went round and round again as we sat down. “I told you not to talk about it unless we brought it up.”
Unless I forgot and called him Daddy.
“You didn’t know you’d already been a Daddy.” His sister was so excited her hands waved around. “You wouldn’t have brought it up and then he’d have worried. This way he knows we’re happy no matter what makes you guys happy. It’s ripping the bandage off so we don’t have to drag it out.”
I wasn’t sure if there was logic in that or not, but Daddy was in charge of family stuff, so I just let him talk.
“No, it’s making Rhodes uncomfortable because you took his agency away from him… and me.” Daddy was really good at telling everyone they were naughty. “Now, you’re both going to pretend to be normal until he gets to know you better and then you can be weird and nosy.”
Was that how family was supposed to work?
His mother ignored them both and smiled at me. “We’ve been very excited to meet you, so you’ll have to forgive us. Knightly has just said so many wonderful things about you.”
Oh, she was good.
I could see why Daddy said she was so scary… it was like the nice thing but bigger-bigger nice.
Hmm.
Maybe the universe had given Daddy a crazy family so mine didn’t seem as bad?
“Thank you.” I wasn’t going to lie and tell them Daddy had said nice things. He hadn’t. “I’m excited to meet you too.”
As long as excited just meant I had bugs in my tummy instead of food.
Look boring.
Look boring.
Look boring.
Don’t look at the page.
Don’t look at the fruit that needs colors.
Don’t look at the crayons.
I was going to need two milkshakes… and lots of fries because salad was just decorations.
Hands in my lap.
Leave the crayons alone.
Sit straight.
“I’m going to do my best to pretend you’ve behaved, so let’s move past this awkward part.” Daddy didn’t look like he wanted to pretend or move past their behavior, but it was going to make me look better later. “He’s long term and remember, I’ll hold a grudge even if he’s polite.”
Aww.
Daddy lied for me.
I wasn’t polite at all.
Reaching under the table, I rubbed his thigh and tried to send him happy thoughts. He’d kept hoping they’d remember their manners. Depending how we defined that maybe they hadn’t failed?
At least they were excited?
I could manage excited.
Focusing on Daddy’s sister, I pretended she’d been well-behaved. “Knightly said you’re in graphic design. What have you been working on lately?”
Yep.
“Oh.” She took a deep breath and ignored Daddy’s not-so-subtle groan. “It’s so fascinating. Let me tell you about it.”
Ha.
It worked.
I just had to keep asking questions and ignore my crayons.
Burger.
Fries.
Milkshakes.
Questions.
Those were what was important.
I could do it.