Chapter 2 #2
I’d thought this would be easy. Terrifying, sure.
Painful, probably. But not confusing. Not something I could mess up before we even got started.
I’d figured I’d just show up and the client would…
would do stuff. Or at least tell me to do stuff.
But not leave me standing out in the hall while he glowered at me, while he looked at me like I was literally the last thing he’d wanted to find waiting on the other side of his door, while he sighed like I was the world’s worst disappointment in ever.
I knew Greg had uploaded my picture after his boss had said I could take one of his clients.
A bunch of pictures, actually. Some of them had been embarrassing and none of them were that great, because I was just me—body too skinny, chin too pointy, eyes too big—but they also weren’t touched-up or misleading or anything.
Hadn’t this guy, the client, even looked before he’d, um, hired my… my services?
His jaw started ticking. “You’re not what I was expecting,” he said, his voice sounding strained.
Something inside me sank like a stone. He must not have looked. Or maybe he had looked, but I wasn’t enough for him without… what? Bringing a “delivery,” too? Had he been expecting me to have recreational drugs? Bring sex toys? Offer him something kinkier?
I didn’t have any of that.
“I’m sorry,” I forced myself to say, since he was still silent. Still looking pissed. “I didn’t bring anything extra, but I can… can do whatever you want. Or I mean, you can. With me. I’m all yours for the whole night. If you still, um, want?”
I was trembling again, and my voice dwindled to barely a whisper by the time I finished rambling.
Uselessly rambling, by the look on his face.
Still, I instinctively held my hands out to display myself, as if that might help convince him to suddenly want me.
.. use me… keep me. Save me from having to do this all over again, with someone else.
It didn’t work.
His eyes raked over me again and his frown turned into a full-blown scowl, making me want to melt right down into the floor with shame.
“No,” he bit out, his jaw clenching so tight this time that I heard something crack. Then he sighed, shaking his head and pinching the bridge of his nose again. “Just… no. Jesus. What was Marcus thinking?”
I didn’t know who Marcus was. Maybe Greg’s boss?
But the outright rejection sent my stomach on another nosedive, worse than the first. Not just because of how badly I needed to make some money before Greg kicked me out, too, but because Greg would kick me out.
He’d have to. He’d gone out on a limb and personally vouched for me with his boss, even though I wasn’t on their regular roster.
He’d even loaned me the clothes, and… and…
Oh God. I couldn’t breathe. I wasn’t going to get another chance, and the next time I tried to do this, once I was on the streets again, I was pretty sure it wouldn’t be with anyone who might be nice.
I made an embarrassing sound, my eyes pricking with hot tears as my knees suddenly turned to water.
“Whoa there,” the client-who-didn’t-want-me said, his big hands wrapping around my arms the second I wobbled. He held me upright, his wide mouth actually softening a little. “Don’t faint on me now.”
I shook my head… then nodded. “Okay, no, I mean, I won’t?”
I’d totally been about to, though.
Maybe.
“You won’t? You don’t sound too sure about that,” the client teased me gently, his lips lifting up at the corners and those big hands of his still holding me steady… secure… safe.
I sucked in a breath, my eyes going wide as that something from the first time he’d touched me suddenly fluttered back to life in my belly.
“I won’t,” I breathed out. “I promise?”
He raised an eyebrow, his grip tightening so deliciously that it took me a second to realize I’d made that promise sound like a question, too.
“Sorry,” I said, heat blazing through my cheeks. “I mean I won’t.”
“Good,” he said, his smile getting even wider as he looked down at me with his eyes all crinkly and those big hands keeping me upright and… and…
“Should I come inside?” I blurted, scared all over again, but this time, that he’d say no.
I held my breath and he went as still as a statue, his eyes flaring so hot for a moment that I thought I’d start to burn, too. But then he let go of me and lost his smile, killing all those flutters dead.
Oh. He was going to tell me to go.
But instead, he ran a hand back through his hair—thick and dark, except for those silver bits—and sighed. “Look, I can’t… I don’t know what Marcus told you. A party favor? Jesus. But there’s no way I’m going to…”
I blinked fast, my throat closing up, and squeezed my hands together tight enough to turn them white as I willed away the stupid stinging in my eyes.
“Oh, hell,” my not-client said, squeezing his eyes closed for a moment. Then he let out a gusty breath and smiled at me again, pulling the door open wider and gesturing toward a plush couch in the shape of an L. “Come inside. We’ll sort this out.”
Inside?
His room?
Had he changed his mind?
The flutters resurrected themselves with a vengeance.
“Yeah, okay, yes,” I agreed, feeling weirdly breathless as I stepped through the door as quick as I could before he could change it back. “I can do that. I can do anything you want.”
I mean, I sort of had to; that was the deal. But I also… I also suddenly wanted to, because I’d never felt flutters like this before. I’d never had hands on me that made me feel safe instead of scared. I’d never met someone who got mad like that, but then didn’t take it out on me.
And even when the heavy door swung shut behind me, the lock automatically clicking into place with a quiet thunk, I didn’t panic.
.. I didn’t suddenly want to bolt... I didn’t even tremble—well, not that much, at least—because maybe I’d been right after all.
Maybe he really was nice. And maybe, if I was very, very good and did exactly what he told me to, he’d decide he wanted to do more than just “sort it out” with me.
Maybe he’d decide he wanted me to stay the whole night after all.