Chapter 37
Addie woke up slightly confused about where she was, and the fact that there was someone in the bed with her.
It had to be Monroe.
Sometimes she’d climb into bed with Addie if she was cold or lonely.
Addie didn’t mind, although occasionally Monroe did like to kick. There was something a bit off about her, though. Her presence in the bed felt heavier. Addie rolled onto her side and reached over to touch Monroe.
This body felt different. Bigger than Monroe. Harder? And warmer. Monroe always ran cold which is why she liked living in Las Vegas.
But this person was hot . . . she started running her hand down their body. If she’d been awake, she really wouldn’t have done it, no matter who it was in the bed with her.
However, her brain wasn’t fully functioning at that moment.
Her hand landed on something firm and strong. What was that?
She slid her hand up higher. Now, it was on something softer. No, it was starting to become harder. What went soft, then hard?
Oh. My. God.
Addie froze. She was barely breathing. If she stopped breathing and passed out could she escape the embarrassment that was about to hit her?
“I’m going to guess by the way you just tensed that you’re awake,” a sleep-roughened voice said.
She let out a small squeak.
“And that it’s possible you’ve realized exactly where your hand is.”
Another quiet squeak escaped that she hoped he didn’t hear, but he probably did.
“So it might be a good idea to remove your hand from where it is right now. I’m rather attached to it, and it’s rather attached to my body. You squeeze it much harder, and I’m scared the blood’s going to stop flowing to it.”
What was he talking about?
Was he trying to say . . . oh my God. She just realized what he meant.
Why the hell did she have her hand on his cock? Humiliation flooded her. This was just too much. Without opening her eyes, she let go then drew herself further under the covers, curling herself up like a turtle.
Snaggles was with her, and she grasped hold of him, rubbing his ear back and forth under her nose for comfort.
That was it. She was going to become a complete hermit. She was going to hide away for the rest of her days. There was no coming back from this sort of embarrassment.
Also, she’d had her hand on Cash Savage’s dick.
She was aware that it was kind of weird to keep saying his full name in her head. And out loud sometimes.
But she couldn’t help it. It just sounded so good.
Imagine being Addie Savage.
Jeez. She was like one of those kids at school who wrote their name in a heart with their secret crush.
Addie had never really had the chance to do that, which was a bit sad when she thought about it. Maybe she was making up for lost time now.
She could also tick something else off the long list of things that Addie hadn’t done.
She had touched a man’s cock.
Only, she hadn’t had his permission. Had he been unwilling? Had she abused him? Did he know that she’d been half asleep and she really hadn’t meant to? What if he didn’t know that?
What if he was now upset with her?
Her heart started to beat rapidly and she knew she was going to be ill.
Even though she didn’t want to move, she also didn’t want to vomit in the bed, so she forced herself to climb out of bed and race over to the attached bathroom.
She made it to the toilet just in time as bile exploded out of her mouth.
Sobs of pain and embarrassment filled the room. Could things get any worse?
And then she felt him behind her, pulling back her hair and rubbing her back. The warmth of him infiltrated the cold in her bones, warming her from the inside out.
Yep, it seemed that things could get worse. He was a witness to her vomiting. Once again.
Honestly, she’d vomited more in the last few days than she had in the last few years.
It scraped her throat raw and made her stomach clench painfully. It wasn’t like she’d had that much to eat last night, so there was hardly anything to come up. Instead, she was just spewing up bile which tasted revolting.
“Please leave,” she begged through a throat that was scraped raw. “I feel humiliated enough without you watching me throw up.”
“Don’t talk. Just breathe nice and slow and calm yourself down. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”
That was easy for him to say. He hadn’t been the one feeling her up.
Not that she’d probably complain about that.
Addie! Get your mind out of the gutter!
Her stomach heaved again, and he held her, but there was nothing left to come out. So she just ended up sagging against his hold, her body too tired to hold her up as she cried silently. He reached over and closed the lid before flushing the toilet and sitting her on top.
“Wait right here,” he told her.
Well, she could do that since she wasn’t actually able to move. She figured if she tried to stand, she’d probably land on her face.
When he returned, he was holding a bottle of water and Snaggles. He handed her Snaggles and then held the bottle of water up to her mouth.
“Small sips,” he told her.
She tried to reach for the bottle to take it out of his hand, but he frowned down at her.
“Hand down. I’m helping you.”
So bossy. But, to be honest, she was shaking too hard to really hold the bottle of water. She took some small sips and let the cold liquid soothe her throat and take away some of the disgusting taste in her mouth.
Then he pulled the bottle of water away. Reaching into his pocket, he drew out some tissues, which he held up to her nose.
“Blow,” he commanded.
Her eyes widened. He didn’t actually expect her to blow her nose into the tissues while he held them, right?
But the look on his face said that he did.
“Addie, blow now.”
His voice was so stern that she didn’t have much choice but to do as she was told. It was gross and disgusting. But after her nose was cleared, she did actually feel quite a bit better. Her hearing wasn’t as muffled, and she could breathe easier.
He used another tissue to wipe her face, before throwing them away and carrying her to the sink. He grabbed her toothbrush, and after adding toothpaste, held it up to her mouth.
“Open up.”
Really? But when she looked at his face, she could see he was serious, so she gave up fighting and just opened her mouth.
He was careful as he brushed her teeth, far gentler than she’d ever be on herself. As she spat it out, he held her up with one hand around her waist as she stood in front of the mirror.
After rinsing out her mouth, she looked into the mirror. God, she looked like death warmed up. Pale with dark marks under her eyes and a bruise on the side of her face. But there was something she had to do, something that she shouldn’t put off any longer.
“I’m so sorry,” she said croakily.
“You need to stop talking,” he warned her.
She shook her head. What she had to say couldn’t be said through a phone or tablet, it had to be said from her.
“I touched you without your permission. I’m so sorry. Do you feel violated?”
His eyes widened, and he gaped down at her. Somehow it was easier to talk when she was staring at him through the mirror rather than facing him.
But that barrier disappeared as he lifted her, turning her in the air and setting her down on her bottom on the counter next to the sink.
She tried to keep her gaze lowered, but he grasped hold of her chin and tilted her head back, giving her a serious look.
“Is that what’s upsetting you?” he asked. “And before you try to talk again, just nod or shake your head.”
She nodded.
“I thought you were upset because I was in your bed,” he said to her.
She shook her head.
“Right, then listen carefully. You don’t have to be upset about this.
I don’t feel violated. I don’t feel like you touched me without permission, or whatever else is going through your head.
You were sleepy. You were running your hand over me.
And frankly, I have no objection to you touching my cock if you want to. I hope that doesn’t scare you.”
It scared her a little bit, which was odd when it also made her feel relieved. This whole situation had all of her feelings upside down and inside out.
She didn’t know what she was feeling half the time, or if it was even the appropriate reaction.
“I can see it does a little bit. I just want you to know that however you want to touch me, I’m likely all right with it.
I mean, if you stuck your wet finger in my ear, or your tongue, or you tried to lick my toes, that might not be okay.
But having your hand around my cock, that’s fine.
I just don’t want you to be upset about it, all right? No more vomiting. No more hiding.”
She nodded.
“I’m going to hug you now, okay?”
Before that could even really register in her mind, he had his arms around her and was rocking her lightly back and forth.
And that sense of safety came back to her. She let out a deep sigh, relaxing into his embrace.
He lifted her up off the counter and held her fully against him. His body was so firm and warm that she snuggled in.
“Oh, baby, you’re all cold, aren’t you? My poor little girl,” he crooned. “I’m going to make you all nice and snuggly and warm. I’m going to get you a warm drink for your throat, and we’re going to have a little chat.”
She made a noise at the suggestion they needed to have a talk. She wasn’t really in a talking mood. If anything, she wanted to slip into Little headspace and just disappear for a while.
“You can go into Little headspace soon if you want,” he promised. “But we just need to make sure that you’re okay first.”
“I am,” she grumbled.
He lightly patted her bottom. It was more the suggestion of a threat than any sort of punishment.
“No more talking. You’ve done enough this morning, and you’re already in trouble for that, remember? I’d hate to have to double your line count.”
Was he serious? He was going to take her from one hundred to two?
That wasn’t very fair.