Chapter 11
Moon
"Dagger..."
"Yes, Baby?" He asks looking down at me, a sparkle glinting in his eyes. That is until he sees the look of panic on my face, his giddy smile morphing into a concerned look.
"We didn't use a condom."
"It's okay, Baby, I’m clean." He soothes me, combing my wet hair away from my face.
"What if I get pregnant, Dagger? I'm not on birth control." That sobers him up a little bit.
A dazed look crosses his face for a moment like he's imagining something, the smirk reappearing before he gives me a more serious look.
"We can stop at the twenty-four-hour drug store and get a plan b... whatever you want or feel comfortable with." He says without a single drop of concern like he's genuinely okay with whatever choice I make. For some reason that calms me a little. Or maybe it's the post-orgasm bliss.
"Okay, we'll do that," I reply with a nod. He nods in agreement letting me choose since it is my body, not to mention all the craziness that would go along with having my father's best friend's baby. I can't even fathom that.
Sneaking around, secret feelings, and longing looks is all we can ever really have together.
Sadness washes over me at the thought as we slowly make our way back to the dock climbing the ladder connected to the end of it. Once we reach the blanket we both crash onto it sleepily.
I'm just saying the sex was great, but swimming back sore as hell -post otherworldly orgasm- was not.
We both lay side by side staring at the stars in silence, completely naked and not even caring. It feels comfortable, but a thick heaviness coats the air. I know it's the impending return to the clubhouse and having to act like none of this ever happened.
I can't even think about not being able to touch him in front of anyone. But that's just how it will have to be, my dad can never find out.
It's not that I care about Razor’s opinion or his disapproval. I only care about the repercussions, and I know they won’t be pretty if he ever finds out.
He would strip Dagger of his patch and the club is all he has, we're Dagger's family. That's only the lighter end of what could happen. He could kill him. He could send me away. There are so many things that could happen that it makes it seem a little easier to keep this thing between us quiet, for the safety of us both.
"What's running through that pretty little head of yours?" Dagger asks, laying on his side propped up by his elbow with his head resting on his hand. His eyes are sparkling in a way that I've never seen before. He looks like he's filled with hope and that's dangerous.
"Nothing, just thinking about what it'll be like when we go back to the club."
"We don't need to think about that right now, Baby." He says, running his fingers gently between my breasts before circling my nipple delicately with his fingertip.
"How are you feeling?" He asks after a stretch of silence.
"Sore," I reply with a satisfied smirk.
"I could get used to this." He says pulling me into his side, brushing his lips against my forehead.
We must doze off because the next thing I know light is blazing down into my eyes waking me from the most peaceful sleep I've had in years.
I pat the area Dagger was in when I fell asleep finding it empty. I sit up the second I realize he's gone, panic filling me.
What if he's regretting what we did and left me here with no way home?
It's right when that thought crosses my mind that I see a fully Dressed Dagger packing the bag he brought for the picnic into his saddle bags.
"I didn't wanna wake you." He tells me with a dimple-popping smile as he approaches. Dressed in the same clothes he had on yesterday except he has the shirt he let me borrow on underneath his Cut.
"What am I supposed to wear?" I ask, looking him up and down as I gather my clothes, wrapping the blanket around me. I feel really exposed when he gazes at my naked body while he's fully dressed, it feels too vulnerable.
"Just zip up the jacket, no one would look at you twice if we pulled up with you in a bra that's how you typically dress. On the other hand if I pull up shirtless with you on the back of my bike there will be talk." He says matter of factly, smiling as he leans down planting a chaste kiss against my lips.
He does that so much lately, it's like he can't get enough since the night Tequila Moon came out to play.
"Well, turn around," I order him, now standing up with the blanket wrapped around myself and tucked under my armpit like a towel, my clothes in one of my hands. He quirks a brow looking at me as if he's asking if I'm serious.
"You realize I've seen all of you and was just inside of you a few hours ago, right?" He asks with a chuckle, making a blush tint my cheeks. I put one hand on my hip giving him a stern look.
"Fine, fine..." Dagger says spinning around to face the tree line while I slide on my clothes. I slide on my thong, then my bra. My underwear sitting higher on my hips than the borrowed gray sweats, somehow giving me a sexy but lazy look. I put the jacket on without bothering to zip it. I'm confident, my rolls out and all. I'm a big girl and there isn't anything wrong with that.
I then quickly slide my socks and boots on. Dagger spins around when I give him the okay, looking me up and down, a clear look of desire painted on his face.
"Sexy little thing." He says resting his hands on my hips, nuzzling his face into my neck kissing the spots that he's learned make me weak.
When he pulls back he drops to one knee in front of me. I immediately panic. What the fuck, what the fuck, what the actual mother fuckity fuck.
Dagger must see me go pale because he pats his knee that's raised then pulls my boot-covered foot onto it almost making me fall on my ass or worse into the water.
He makes quick work of lacing up my riding boots that I didn't even realize I'd forgotten to tie. I let out a shaky breath wondering why I'd even thought for a second it was anything more. We could never have that.
Asking for more than good sex from him would be greedy knowing the trouble it would cause if word got out.
We stop by the drug store on the way back to the clubhouse, grabbing a Plan B and a cold caramel coffee for me to wash it down with. While I'm taking it he's tapping away on his phone, a frown on his face.
"What's wrong?" I ask gripping each side of his Cut as I stand in front of him, Dagger leaned against his parked bike. The chain bracelet he gave me when I had to go into hiding sparkles on my wrist, I've never taken it off.
"Club business," he replies, in a clipped tone before typing away some more.
"Gotta go to Florida to help Wrecker, about half the club is riding out tonight."
"For how long?" I ask, a panicked feeling spreading through my chest when I think about him leaving so soon when this thing between us is so fresh, but I know club business is club business and there isn't anything I can do about it.
"Don't know yet Baby, could be anywhere from a couple of days to a couple weeks." He says, still staring at his phone, not giving me a second glance.
We ride back to the clubhouse in silence, a couple of sweet caresses from Dagger along the way, but they feel off knowing he's leaving. Knowing there'll be club whores in Florida, knowing he isn't my old man and if he wants to fuck one of them, he can.
When we walked into the clubhouse no one questioned where we were all night. No one really gets a chance to because everyone is immediately called to church leaving me with Stray, the creepy newest patched member drinking a beer and playing poker.
What feels like hours later, way more than half the club brothers head upstairs. They’re packing I'm sure.
About an hour or so later I'm waving goodbye to Dagger, My dad, Swiss, Stray, and a few other members. Leaving only Pyro and Doc behind with me. Pyro ruffles my hair when he notices the concern in my eyes.
After a few minutes Doc lets us know that he's got a shift at the hospital that he's gotta go get dressed for. Leaving only, Pyro and I.
I know if they're going to support another charter that means there's danger. Some of these Brothers I'm waving to, might come back in a pine box with dimes covering their eyes to pay their passage to the ferryman.
My gut twists with nausea and I can't tell if it's the plan b doing its job or the stress of my Father, Dagger, and men that are like family to me riding headfirst into danger. I guess that speaks to their loyalty though. Sometimes I wish this life wasn't so dangerous.
When the rumble of tailpipes fades we shut the door to the clubhouse and lock up, Pyro telling me what I already know.
"Alright little Devil, you know the drill. Lockdown until they get back. Gotta make sure you're safe, so no leaving this clubhouse-"
"I know. Our enemies will know our numbers are down and could decide to attack," I say cutting him off with an eye roll, knowing were at peace with everyone in our neck of the woods at the moment.
He affectionately smacks my shoulder, almost knocking me over with the unintentional force behind it. I tuck my hair behind my ear and Pyro's eyes immediately land on my neck. Shit. Shit. Shit. I forgot.
"What's that?" He asks pressing down on what I'm sure is a hickey, trying to wipe it away.
"This some kind of prank kid?" He asks pulling out his phone like he's gonna take a picture of it and report to my dad. I quickly cover it back up with my hair. His eyebrows raise with an unspoken question. Like he's saying 'Who the hell gave you that hickey?'.
"It was a slip with my hair straightener, it's a burn."
"You've been wearing your hair natural lately girl, you can't fool an old trickster." He replies a stern look painted on his face as he crosses his arms intimidatingly. We have a stare-off for a few seconds before I break eye contact. His eyes analytically scan the rest of me stopping on the leather jacket a look of understanding passing over his face.
"Why are you wearing Dagger's leather?" He asks angrily. Like he knows the answer already and can read right through me. He's pissed. Pyro has always been protective over me, over women in general really. I know it stems back to his childhood and his momma but he refuses to talk about it.
"He let me borrow it because it was cold on the bike." I feel like that was a reasonable explanation, but Pyro isn't buying it.
"You're lucky your dad needs a clear mind heading into the Florida chapter's mess or he'd know about this shit right now. You better be the one to tell him when he gets back Little Devil or I will." I can feel a panic attack coming on at his words.
Fuck.
He tucks his phone back into his pocket and I dash upstairs, snagging a bottle of whiskey along the way to keep the panic attacks and flashbacks at bay.