Chapter 7
Halfway through the day, I’m officially ready to be homeschooled.
The cafeteria is a nightmare, loud, packed, and overwhelming. The moment I step in, the noise and bodies press in on me like a wall.
I grab a tray of decent-looking food, pay, and slip outside to the attached student courtyard. It’s still too warm to be comfortable, but that means it’s almost empty.
I find a shady table and sit, pulling out my earbuds. The music helps dull the racket in my head. Humming along, I scroll through my phone, grabbing a bite every few minutes.
So far today, both teachers made me introduce myself to the class. Public humiliation, twice before lunch? Stellar.
It’s worked wonders for my popularity. I’ve been catcalled, bullied, judged… all before noon. Jessie wasn’t kidding and Axel couldn’t have been more wrong. This school will eat me alive.
Someone drops into the chair beside me, disturbing my peace. Warily, I pull out an earbud and look over the newcomer. He’s goodlooking. Wears a letterman jacket. Oozes crazy confidence. He must be some type of jock.
“Hey, baby. Mind if I sit here?”
“Actually -”
“Thanks,” he cuts in, settling beside me like we’re old friends. “So, you’re the new girl huh?”
“Yep.”
“I’m Darren.” He flashes a salacious grin. “What’s your name, beautiful?”
“Lina.”
“Luscious Lina!” He winks.
Jesus Christ. No. Just, no.
He barrels ahead before I can correct him.
“So, Luscious Lina… let me take you out on Friday.”
Not a question. A demand.
“Oh, I already -”
“Great!” He slides closer, making me feel clammy.
“What do you do for fun, Luscious Lina?”
Before I can answer, his hand lands on my knee. I freeze.
“I bet you’re a real dirty girl, huh?” he murmurs, eyes raking over my body. Predatory. Wrong. “You look innocent, but I can tell. You have that fuckable look about you. Tell me… has someone already popped that cherry?”
His fingers move higher. I try to shove his hand off, but in response, he grips tighter. My surroundings dim. His voice becomes white noise—just vile, buzzing filth. My heart races. My throat locks up. Tears spill over, hot and silent.
Weak. That’s what I tell myself. Useless. Broken.
The world narrows to the pressure of his hand creeping higher on my thigh. I can’t breathe. I can’t move.
Oh God.
Suddenly, Darren’s hand is ripped off me, and he’s pulled out of his chair. I remain deathly still, trapped in my own head.
I’m vaguely aware of a scuffle going down nearby. There’s cursing and yelling, but I’m stuck in a prison of my mind and can’t find my way out.
“Lina! Hey, Lina! You’re ok. Breathe, Princess. Come back to me.”
The voice cuts through the fog, warm and insistent. Familiar.
Gradually, I become conscious of my surroundings again. I hear the chirping of birds, feel the light breeze blowing across my skin, and then, the firm hand cupping my cheek. I lurch back to find Axel, kneeling in front of me, palms raised.
“Hey. It’s ok. I’m sorry. I won’t touch you again.” He speaks calmly, voice low and careful. “Are you with me, now?”
Lip trembling, I manage a small nod.
“Good.”
He stands abruptly and shouts at someone over my shoulder—
“Piss off!”
His tone and sudden movement startle me, but he instantly lowers his voice again. “Sorry! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you.”
I swallow hard and lift a shaky hand to my face. It’s damp. Tears. Shit.
My eyes shoot around, throat tight. Who saw that? Who saw me?
Axel notices. He leans in like he’s going to grab my chin but catches himself and stops short.
“Lina.” His voice grounds me again. “No one’s out here but us. I sent them all back inside. It’s just you and me. Okay?”
I sniffle and wipe my eyes on my sleeve. Without a word, Axel grabs a few napkins from my tray and offers them, careful not to touch me. I take them and attempt to clean myself up.
I’m a mess. A teenage trainwreck. If people weren’t already talking before, they definitely will be now.
When I finally stop crying, Axel stands and takes the seat next to mine. Still silent. Still here.
“What happened, Lina?”
I don’t respond. A, we don’t have time to unpack that question, and B, I don’t trust him enough to try. Not yet. He may have shown me compassion just now, but I still remember the scowl, the cold shoulder, the way he treated me this weekend.
“Lina?”
Still, I say nothing.
Axel slams his fist down on the table.
I shrink, squeezing my eyes shut. But nothing else happens. No yelling. No threats.
When I peek them open, he’s back to kneeling in front of me, his honey-brown eyes locked on mine.
“What happened?” he repeats, softer this time. “Who hurt you?”
He searches my eyes, seeming to be contemplating that last part internally, instead of actually asking.
I shake my head. I won’t tell him. Not now. Maybe not ever. Some secrets are best kept in the dark.
“That’s okay,” he accepts. “You don’t have to tell me now. But you’ll talk eventually.”
He continues watching me carefully.
“That was a significant PTSD episode.”
My breath stutters. How the hell does he know that?
As if reading my mind, he adds, “Johnny used to get them, too. He’s a lot better now. Hasn’t had one in a while. If you won’t talk to me, maybe talk to him.”
He stands, brushing off his hands, then grabs my purple backpack from the ground.
“Come on.”
“Where are we going?” I croak.
“Home.”
“What? I can’t skip class. It’s my first day!”
“You’re not skipping.” He’s already walking. “We’ll tell the nurse you’re sick. Then I’ll take you home.”
With no better plan and no energy to argue, I follow.
The halls are blissfully empty. The afternoon classes have already started, and the silence is a relief. Instead of heading to the front office like I expect, Axel veers toward a door nearby and opens it, ushering me inside.
“Nurse Kelley! My favorite lady,” he calls in a flirty tone.
The nurse looks barely older than us, brunette, early twenties at most. She lights up at the sight of him.
“Axel Harrington! What are you doing in my office?”
“This is my cousin, Lina.” He flashes those stupid dimples. “She’s not feeling great and needs to go home. I should be on her emergency contact list. Can you write us a pass?”
“Axel,” she says, clearly torn. “You know that’s against policy. Even if you’re over eighteen, students aren’t supposed to check out other students.”
Then, she finally looks at me. Really sees me. My puffy eyes. Mascara-stained cheeks. Pale face.
“Oh, you poor thing!” she says, her voice softening. “Is she actually sick?”
“Of course she is.” Axel puts a hand over his heart. “Do you think I’d lie to you?”
“Please,” she scoffs, typing at her computer. “You live to lie to me. Hold on.”
After a beat, she clicks through something on her screen and sighs. It’s the familiar sound of defeat.
“Alright. You’re cleared. But this is a one-time thing, Axel. Don’t make me regret it.”
“I would never… You’re the best!” he winks, guiding me out of the office and leaving the nurse with pink cheeks.
“Suck-up,” I mutter.
Axel barks a laugh.
“I won’t deny it.”
We head back to the car. Him? Cool as a cucumber. Me? A nervous wreck.
"Why are you being nice to me?" I suddenly blurt.
"What?"
"Why are you being nice to me?" I repeat. "Just a few days ago you were threatening me in my room. And now, you're helping me. Why? I don't get it."
I chew on my bottom lip waiting for his response. It's not like me to be confrontational, but I don't understand his intentions.
He sighs. "It was wrong of me to come at you like that. You have to understand, it was out of concern for my family. It wasn't anything against you. And yeah, I said some pretty shitty things."
He holds an arm out to bring me to a stop. I look up at him curiously, wondering what we're waiting for, and meet his honey-brown eyes.
"I didn't mean any of it. I have a bad habit of being impulsive. I know it's something I need to work on it. I'm sorry, Lina. Forgive me? Please?"
He seems genuine in his apology, and he did me a huge favor today. I also don't want to be living in another stressful environment, so I decide to throw him a bone.
"Yeah, I forgive you."
He gives me a small smile conveying his gratitude, and we continue to the car.
Neither of us talks during the drive home, but the silence isn’t awkward.
When we pull into the driveway, I get out without a word and slip through the front door. Axel doesn’t try to stop me. He just lets me go.
I’m on autopilot, heading straight to my room. Straight to my bed. The adrenaline crash is hitting hard, and the panic, the fear, the guilt… they leave me hollow. I stare at the ceiling.
Why do men need to ruin beautiful things?
Why do they need to take? And break? And scar?
And why is it me who always seems to attract them?