Chapter 30
ROMAN
“Oh my God, this place is so in right now?”
I genuinely don't know if that was a statement or a question. But I also don’t give a fuck.
So I ignore Anna, like I’ve been doing all fucking night, and slug back the drink in my hand. I don’t miss Bane’s piercing look as he watches me reach for the bottle of vodka in the bucket of ice on our VIP table and snatch it up. But I ignore him as I refill my glass and bring it back to my lips.
Fuck it. Right now, this is fucking medicinal.
Anna is still babbling away about God-knows-what.
I’m ignoring her. I’m ignoring my friends, too, together with their ladies.
Carmine, Lyra, Nico, and Naomi are all clustered to one side of me, making plans to head out to Carmine and Nico’s father Vito’s house out on Long Island in a week.
Nero is all cozied up with Milena sitting on his lap, his hand tangled in her hair and his face buried in her neck as she giggles and blushes and only half-heartedly tries to shoo him away while she talks to Brooklyn.
Laz has some girl whose name I don’t remember—I doubt he does either—eating out of his palm as he plies her with his usual bullshit. And Bane…
Well, Bane actually pulled my attention for a second, but only because I thought the fucker was staring at my goddamn sister. But it’s not Evie he’s got his fierce gaze locked on. It’s the girl with the silvery-pink hair sitting next to her.
Interesting.
But not interesting enough to pull my attention fully away from what it is fully engrossed in, across the club.
Him.
Specifically, him and whoever the fuck she is: the fucking brunette wearing too much eyeshadow, straddling his lap and sucking his neck.
The urge to maim or cause serious bodily harm thunders through me.
It’s been three fucking weeks since that night in the alley…my drunken and entirely cringe attempt to…I don’t even know. Push him? To what end? Or confront him? Same question.
All I know is, that night he took me somewhere I’d never been—dark, beyond where we’d gone before, as terrifying as it was thrilling.
The fucked-up truth is, that night in the alley might be the best sex I’ve ever had. It’s also the most brutal sex I’ve ever had.
I was sore for days afterward. But I was also so hard it hurt, and I’ve spent more times than I can count since that night stroking my swollen cock, trying to recapture the heat of that moment as he fucked me against the brick wall.
But there’s no touching whatever that was. Not even close.
A week ago, deep into a bottle, I actually thought about recreating that moment more…truthfully.
AKA with an actual partner. Somehow, I forced myself to download Grindr again. But after the tenth guy in five minutes messaged me “throat my cock, daddy” or “bend me over and rail me”, I just felt…numb.
Cold.
Sick.
Disgusted, and not because I was thinking about sex with men.
Because I was thinking about sex with men who weren’t him.
That’s the only reason I let Laz hook me up with Anna tonight: I had to feel something else. Anything other than that ache whenever I think of Val.
As if cued by a director with a sadistic sense of timing, the fucking brunette across the room on his lap giggles loudly. She grinds her hips on him, shoving her tits in his face.
He doesn’t want you. He wants ME.
Bitterness curls inside me.
He doesn’t want me. He made that abundantly clear when he fucked me against the wall, made me come harder than I’ve ever come before, left his cum trickling down my leg, and left.
For good.
I’ve been trying to swallow that bitter pill ever since, but it seems there's no amount of alcohol in the world that’ll help it down.
Mercifully, Anna finally slips away from my side. She starts talking animatedly to Brooklyn and Milena about fuck-who-even-cares as she pours herself another drink from the bottle on ice.
“Hey, are you okay?”
I smile at the sound of my sister’s voice. My eyes swivel to her as she takes a seat on the banquette next to me, her pink dress fanned out around her and a barely touched—thank fuck—glass of bubbly in her hand. She looks at me sadly, her brow slightly furrowed.
“Roman?”
“All good, Evie,” I mumble. “Just…enjoying the night.”
She smiles wryly, turning to look at Anna, still babbling away at Brooklyn, Milena, and Nero. The first two are trying to be polite and feign interest in whatever she’s saying. Nero looks like he wants to cut off his ears.
“She’s…interesting?” Evie ventures. “How did you two meet?”
“Pretty sure Laz used to sleep with her.”
Evie makes the face I’d expect her to make hearing me say that.
“Oh,” she says tightly, her face turning the same color as her dress. “That’s...yeah.”
I chuckle. “Don’t let me ruin your night, Eves. Just being a grump.”
“You've been a grump for a while.” She frowns. “I’ve been trying not to be annoying about it, but I’m curious, and I care about you—”
“Evie,” I smile as I take her hand. “I’m fine, really. Just…lots on my mind.”
She makes a face. “Dasha, huh?”
Sure. Let's go with that.
“I guess,” I lie, feeling like a piece of shit for it.
Her mouth twists as she pats my hand. “You know I’m here whenever you need, right?”
I grin at her. “Yeah. I know.”
“And you remember what mom used to say about yucky situations?”
I smile quietly. “I’m surprised you do.”
Evie was five when our mom died.
She grins. “When life gives you lemons…”
“Make lemonade,” we finish together.
I wink and tap my glass to hers. “Thanks, Evie.”
She squeezes my hand. “Any time. You sure you’re okay?”
Nope.
“I’m great.”
She nods. “Well, I won’t interrupt your date. But Rome?” She eyes the drink in my hand. “Go easy?”
“Always.”
She goes back over where she was talking to Dove. Anna slides next to me, giggling and talking about—again—I have no fucking clue what. I ignore her and bring my glass to my lips, taking a deep slug and bringing my gaze back to Val.
Suddenly, he turns. His face swivels my way, and when he sees me, he suddenly freezes. So do I, still ignoring whatever the fuck Anna is saying as she wraps herself around my arm. My eyes lock with Val’s, and I shiver when I see the way his jaw grinds.
Fuck, why is he so goddamn attractive? Why does he have to be so fucking magnetic?
His gaze drags over me, making my skin sizzle. The icy blue glint in his eyes flashes at me, and suddenly, I can’t breathe. Can’t think. Or rather, can’t think about anything except him, touching me, kissing me, swallowing me.
Fucking me until I beg for more.
I squeeze my eyes shut.
This needs to stop.
But when I open my eyes, he’s still there. Still ignoring the brunette on his lap. Still staring at me.
Igniting me.
Melting me.
Turning me the fuck on.
“Ooooh, baby!”
I flinch when Anna squeals in my ear. Her hand drops to my lap, and my attention rips from Val to her when she squeezes the bulge there.
“Someone’s hard for me…”
Before I can open my mouth to say “you couldn’t be more wrong”, she’s crawling into my lap and straddling me.
I scowl, gritting my teeth. “Stop it,” I growl.
She giggles. “Why, baby?” She grins. “Someone obviously wants—”
“My sister is here,” I grunt, grabbing her hips and trying to slide her off me without causing a scene.
She grins. “Mm, sounds kinky.”
What the literal fuck.
I stare at her. “The hell is wrong with you?”
Anna giggles as she drops her mouth to my ear. “Everything,” she purrs. “So you can do anything you want to me, baby. Fuck, I’ve been wet for you all night.”
I barely hear her, turning my head to glare at Val.
…But he’s not there anymore.
Fury ignites in my chest as I picture him walking out with the fucking skank that was on his lap. Taking her home.
Touching her.
Kissing her.
Fucking her.
I’m milliseconds away from physically throwing Anna off me and storming out of the club to wrestle him away from that cunt when suddenly—
Speak of the devil.
Past Anna, I catch a glimpse of Val dropping into the seat across from me, next to Brooklyn, Milena, and Nero.
The girl isn’t with him.
Anna is purring some fucking psycho shit in my ear, calling me daddy and telling me to break her pussy. Whatever. I’m ignoring her, craning forward and trying to hear what Brooklyn is saying to Val over the thudding club music.
“….left?”
Val nods, shrugging. “…fucked up…batshit crazy…”
I feel myself grin darkly as he sits back in the booth, sipping a beer.
I glance around, and when I see the brunette stalking out the front door, my smile widens.
He told her no.
Because of me?
I know how fucking pathetic it sounds—how needy and desperate and totally cringe. But it’s all I have to grasp onto as I look at him over Anna’s shoulder, remembering his scent. The taste of his skin. The sound of his voice rumbling against my back.
I wince, whipping my head around to stare at Anna, still on my lap. My earlobe is throbbing.
The psycho just fucking bit it to get my attention.
“Well?” she giggles.
I stare at her, my brow furrowed. “What?”
She rolls her eyes. “I said, let’s do something crazy tonight.” She giggles again as she drops her mouth to my ear. “You make me feel naughty, baby.” I roll my eyes when she licks the side of my neck. “You can do whatever you want to me tonight.”
How about put you on a plane to as far away from here as possible.
I don’t even know why I agreed to take her out tonight. I don’t want her. I don’t want any of this. I just want…
I look up, and suddenly freeze.
Val is no longer alone.
The brunette from earlier is back, with a trim, male-model looking motherfucker.
…And they are both sitting on Val’s fucking lap.
My last nerve bends, tightens, and snaps like a twig inside me.
Somehow, I drag my eyes up to his. Val’s looking right at me, pure venom in his eyes as he watches Anna writhe on my lap. His mouth twists into a cold line, and I watch with a fury I can't even articulate as he wraps an arm around each of their waists, making them grin and lean into him.